Kai

My eyes burn as they open, and the empty hospital room is revealed under a groggy haze. No one is waiting for that split second when I wake up and announce that I’m okay, that I made it. I’m a grown fucking man, but the loneliness of that isn’t something I’d wish on anyone. Not even a nurse is looking after me. With a shaky hand, I hit the call button on the side of the hospital bed, which is way too fucking small.

The light on the button blinks with urgency.

Round and round. The car flipped. It fucking rolled five times before I lost count. With a battered body and a concussed brain, I pulled myself from my beloved car as it burned. I was barely crawling through the grass as the fucking thing was engulfed.

Teagan.

Teagan.

Teagan.

A thin, tall man wafts through the door with ease and a bounce in his step. “You’re a lucky man,” he declares as his introduction before messing with my monitor and scribbling on a clipboard.

“The girl.” My words are barely audible, scratchy, and hoarse.

He gives me the face, the face you don’t want to see from any medical professional while you’re asking for news. “You probably shouldn’t try to talk. You inhaled a good deal of smoke while waiting for emergency responders.”

I clutch the bedrail. “Where is the girl”—I’m choked by an insatiable cough and have to take a second to breathe—“who was with me?” My teeth grind before I endure another hacking fit.

“Do you remember what happened, Mr. Grant?”

“Yes. Accident.” I grab his wrist, which causes a biting throb to ricochet through me. “What happened to the girl?”

He won’t say the words.

He won’t say the words.

He won’t say the words.

He won’t say it. I need the doctor.

“I’m just the nurse. I’m not supposed to deliver this kind of news …” He looks around the room, as if he’s holding the world’s largest secret. “I’m sorry. The girl, Teagan, she’s gone.”

She’s dead.

Teagan Hensley is dead.

That’s what he said.

“There was no hope for survival for Ms. Hensley. It happened before the ambulance even made it to you both, sir,” he continues on.

Professional, he can’t say what he’s really thinking.

His tone implies the truth of his thoughts though.

He implies that my actions, my decisions … killed Teagan Hensley.

My car, my precious toy, it was going too fast, and she didn’t survive.

That’s what he wants to say.

I’m getting the fuck out of this hospital bed. I sit up and search the room for my belongings. Is my phone here, or was it in the car?

“Sir, I need for you to remain calm.” To his credit, the guy barely flinches as he fiddles with the syringe he pushes into my IV. The drugs immediately slow me down.

“Get out!” The two words are slurred.

The nurse steels his spine and exits. A man, thick in build and short in stature, walks in, and I search for his name on his badge. Dr. Christopher Sanderson. I’m thankful that the name rings a bell.

“You should sit back. Your injuries are somewhat severe. You need to relax and stay calm.” Even though he tells me this, he makes no move to fiddle with the machines I’m hooked up to.

The minimal effort I made toward fleeing has me wheezing for air, and my closed fist draws to my chest.

“Mr. Grant, the accident you were in earlier today was bad. It’s a miracle that you’re alive. You must have been working on pure adrenaline when you pulled yourself from your vehicle.”

No fucking kidding, asshole. I was going a buck twenty around a curve.

“You need to heal. No matter what it is that landed you here, that doesn’t change the fact that your injuries are real and serious. Keep still and don’t give the nurses a hard time.”

Those words are fucking ridiculous to anyone in my shoes.

I shake my head.

“The speed at which you were driving, well, it was unreasonably fast. I have no idea how you made it out in the shape you did.”

I know that. Remember, a buck twenty?

“Get out!” Somehow, I manage to put force behind my words.

“If nothing else, I need to brief you on your injuries, Kai. You were hurt pretty badly, no matter the current circumstances.”

“Get out!” I grit my teeth so tightly that spit shoots from my mouth. “I won’t say it again …” I test my limits to see if I’m able to get up from the bed.

Unfortunately, I’m not.

The moronic doctor deserves to be paid a lot less.

He retreats from the room with a slight shake of his head, one so small that I’m sure he assumes I don’t see it, but I do, and the motion has me seeing red.

I close my eyes and can’t help but think about a world without Teagan. Her laughter extinguished. The way she gave beautiful art to the world gone. It’s hard to breathe when I imagine never again experiencing her touch, the sensation of her lips tingling against my skin. The idea of the rest of her life, with me, our future not being an option is too much to bear. She promised me I’d get to see that black dress, her in that delicate piece of fabric. As my throat closes and my heart falls heavy in my chest, the image of never seeing her in a white dress instead has me gasping for air.