EMELIA
Days had gone by, and except for Colin and Deacon communicating with one another, there wasn't an overabundance of conversation in that cabin. There was some, but he spent more time in a sullen silence than engaged with me. Even more disconcerting to me, there was no news from my father yet. At least, none that Deacon shared with me.
Except for the fact that I was being held against my will, staying at the cabin wasn't half-bad actually. In a weird way, it almost felt like a vacation – at least, if you forgot about being restrained at night and the lack of any sharp objects within my reach. He was so untrusting of that that even silverware was kept locked up and inventoried harder than a bank vault.
But I had to admit, all things considered, it wasn't half bad. When we did talk, the flirting with Deacon continued and even grew a little heated at times. Sometimes I think out of boredom, we were just trying to press each other's buttons, see how far the other would take it. I knew Deacon would fuck me in a heartbeat if I offered myself up though – he was just that kind of man.
But he was testing me, and he seemed to be enjoying the little game of chicken we were playing. How far would the sweet, innocent, Emelia Antonelli go?
The problem with this little game though, was that I wasn't sure how far I would actually go. The closer he got to kissing me, for instance, the more I found myself yearning for him to do it. He was a powerfully attractive and seductive man and something in me longed for him.
I knew that this was getting dangerous and because of that, I was really hoping Colin could work something out with my father sooner rather than later. But the other part of me hoped I would have more time with Deacon in the cabin. Because the truth of the matter – as terrible as it was to think it – was that Deacon Murphy was probably my ideal man, in most every single way. Ideal, except for the fact that he was technically the enemy. Though, I was so caught up in him that the enemy part didn't even really register on my heart or in my head.
“Do you think my father will do it?” I asked him. “Do what you asked him to do?”
“Do you want him to?” Deacon asked me, staring straight at me with a serious look on his face. “So that you no longer have to marry Tony?”
I looked down at my hands, which were clasped in my lap, but I couldn't find the words. No, I didn't want someone to die because of me. But truth be told, Tony wasn't a good man and I didn't like him – let alone love him. And that was something I never saw changing.
I really didn't want to be married to him, to sleep with him every single night, to have his children. I didn't want anything to do with him. Even if in the end, I was forced to marry him, I couldn't imagine that I'd saved my virginity all these years just to be given away to a man as part of a goddamn business deal.
“I want to get out of the marriage, yes. But I don't want anyone to die because of it,” I said softly. “I don't want him killed, I just don't want to marry him.”
The tears welled up in my eyes as I remembered the nights we'd already spent together – the way his filthy hands tried to pull off my clothing, his terrible smelling breath, the leathery feel of his skin. I remembered his utter insistence that I fuck him even I told him many, many times that I was saving myself for our wedding night. He tried, hard, to convince me otherwise, but I'd always managed to push him off me. But once we were married, I'd have no excuses. I'd have to give myself to him whether I liked it or not. The mere thought of it sent waves of revulsion through me.
I looked back up at Deacon who was watching me closely, but not saying a word. If I expected him to comfort me, I was out of luck. He didn't seem to be the warm, comforting, warm and fuzzy type. At least, not to me.
Wiping my eyes on my sleeve, I asked, “Mind if I lie down for a bit?”
“We just woke up about an hour ago,” he said.
“Not like there's much else to do in this god forsaken place,” I muttered.
“I can think of a few things,” he said with a smile.
And as I looked at his glittering eyes and that roguish smile, it hit me – this was my chance to make my own choices. This was my chance to not let my father – or Tony – decide what I could do and who I could be with. Even if Deacon's plans failed and I had no choice but to marry Tony, at least I had this one moment to take control of myself and make my own choices for a change. At least I had the opportunity to give myself to someone because I wanted to – not because I was being required to as the terms of some business obligation.
I had this one moment to just be myself and carve a little slice of happiness out of this world and my life for my own.
“Well then – maybe you'd care to join me upstairs?” I asked, my voice was barely more than a whisper as I stared across at Deacon.
He raised an eyebrow and and looked at me for a long moment before laughing almost hysterically.
“Damn. That was a good one, love,” he said. “You almost had me. I almost believed ya for a second, until I remembered what a good lil girl you are.”
Standing up, I walked over to where Deacon was sitting in the chair, staring at me with those deep, blue eyes of his. Never taking my eyes off of him, I straddled him in the chair, sitting down in his lap, one leg on each side of him. I felt his erection pressing into my warm, suddenly very wet center – I knew he wanted it. And judging by the fire burning between my thighs, so did I.
His laugh was a little nervous and he was looking anywhere but into my eyes. I could tell that he was trying so hard to be on his best behavior because he wasn't like the other men in the Irish mob I'd encountered – he had morals and values. And his values told him that taking advantage of girls like me – in the position he had me in – was wrong.
But what if I wanted him to take advantage of me? Was it wrong in that case? Would that go against his morals and values? Would it go against mine? I didn't know. About the only thing I was sure of, was that I was tired of other people controlling my life.
“Maybe I'm tired of being such a good girl, Deacon,” I said, softly pressing my lips to his.
He didn't pull away, but he didn't kiss me back either. I pushed my long hair over my shoulder and lowered myself so I could run the tip of my tongue along his neck, taking in his musky, manly scent. Savoring it. He smelled so good, I didn't know why I'd never noticed it before, but his scent did wonders to my libido. It made the fire in me burn even brighter, almost involuntarily making me grind myself into him.
Deacon let out a muffled groan as I sucked and kissed his neck, but he didn't join in the fun. He was trying to be good, to not give into me. I could tell by how hard his cock was that he wanted to – he really wanted to. But he was trying to restrain his carnal urges. It looked like I was going to have to do more convincing.
Pulling back, I gave him my best, most sultry bedroom eyes.
“Please Deacon? Please let me have this?” I said. “Let me have you? If only this once?”
“Not that I don't appreciate the offer love, but what exactly are you hoping to get out of fucking me?”
“Honestly?”
He nodded. “I'd appreciate it.”
“I want to take back my body,” I said. “So if I have to marry that creep, at least I know I don't go him pure. That I kept something for myself. He doesn't deserve that, Deacon.”
“And I do?”
I shrugged. “If I'm being honest, I find you incredibly attractive at least. Him? Not in the least. I'll have to fake it with him and hope I don't throw up when he touches me. At least with you – well, I might have a chance at enjoying it. And I think I deserve that.”
Deacon smiled. “Oh, you'll enjoy it alright. I guarantee it.”
“Does this mean – ”
But before I could finish my question though, Deacon kissed me – hard – shoving his tongue into my mouth and literally taking my breath away. His hands were suddenly on my waist, pulling me down onto his stiff cock. His fingers dug into my flesh, pulling me down harder and even through my clothes, and I felt just how hard he was for me.
So hard and so large that I had to admit – it scared me a bit. Given that it was my first time, I was afraid that I would do something wrong or not be very good. Especially with a man like Deacon who had so much experience with sex under his belt. As I ground myself against him and he kissed me, a million questions swirled through my mind. Would I actually be able to take all of him into me? Would it hurt? Would he be gentle with me, I wondered?
With my heart racing and adrenaline surging through my body, I knew that I was about to find out. Reaching down, I fumbled with Deacon's pants, trying to unzip them while also straddling him – a feat I found more difficult than I'd first though.
“The movies make this look so much easier,” I said, color rushing to my cheeks.
Deacon stood, picking me up, and carried me over to the couch. My legs were wrapped around his body and when he laid me down, he came down with me.
“Here, let me take care of the hard stuff,” he said, removing my pants with one hand – to my ever-lasting amazement.
He moved down lower on my body, and I stared down at him, confused as to what he was doing at first, but when his mouth found my clit, it all made perfect sense. My body arched upward toward him as I gasped in surprise.
“Figured you'd need to be warmed up a bit, love,” he said.
Deacon went to town on my pussy, sucking and licking and doing all kinds of crazy things that drove me absolutely wild. I never knew a man could enjoy this so much – and surely, I'd never enjoyed myself so much – but I could tell that Deacon was having fun with it, taking his time and looking up at me with those icy blue eyes of his while he pleasured me.
“Deacon, oh God, Deacon,” I muttered, tossing my head from side-to-side.
There was a sensation low in my body, a tightness in the muscles of my vagina, as the swelling of pleasure started building up inside of me. It felt like I might explode, and I had to wonder if this is what it felt like to orgasm with a man. I'd pleasured myself in the past, sure, but this was different. This was – magical. And as that sensation built, I could tell that it was going to be far more powerful than any orgasm I'd ever given myself.
And as I reached the peak, Deacon grabbed onto my ass and lifted me closer to him, fucking me with his tongue as the spasms took control of my body as well as my mind. My entire body exploded in pleasure, wave after wave of electrical impulses sending me thrashing wildly on the couch, only held in place by Deacon's strong hands.
I was gasping and my body already felt a little wrung out, but Deacon wasn't done with me yet. Staring up at me with his face slick with my juices, he removed his pants.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” he asked.
“Yes, Deacon, yes,” I said, writhing on the couch, needing to feel him inside of me.
My first time shouldn't be with some old family friend. And it shouldn't be the consummation of a goddamn business deal. My first time should be with someone I was attracted to. Somebody I wanted. And regardless of how fucked up the situation was and why I was there in the first place, I found that I was deeply attracted to Deacon.
“I'm positive, Deacon!” I almost shouted. “I need you inside of me.”
Deacon lowered himself on top of me and I could feel his dick pressing directly against my opening. Squeezing my eyes shut, I braced for the pain they always told you about the first time you had sex, but he hesitated and didn't enter me. I opened my eyes, not understanding what was happening and why he wasn't inside of me yet.
I stared into those baby blue eyes and he smiled at me – actually smiled! And then he kissed me softly. Like he knew that this would be unpleasant for me, and he was going slow to minimize any pain. My kidnapper taking the time to consider my feelings? That shocked the hell out of me – and whether he'd intended to or not, told me a lot about the character of this man.
I'd used dildos before, so it wasn't like nothing had ever entered my body before The only difference was that I'd never put anything inside of me that was this large or this real before. As the tip of his cock pressed against my opening, I gasped. And when he slowly stretched me open as he slid into my, I groaned and bit my bottom lip hard. My eyes opened wide as he entered me, inch by glorious inch. There was a momentary flash of pain, but then a tsunami of pleasure that followed.
Judging by the look on his face, I could tell he wanted to thrust inside me, wanted to fuck me hard. But he moved slowly, deliberately taking his time, savoring the sensation of my tight pussy closing in around his cock.
Because of the wetness from both my natural juices and from his mouth, it hurt far less than I had expected it to. There was some pain, yes, but it was a good type of pain. Pleasure mixed with pain – which only heightened the sensations and made them all the more potent. I held onto Deacon and gasped as he entered me, finally filling me up completely.
Eyes wide, I stared up at him, shocked at the feeling of it all. I'd never had been filled up so completely, not like this. No toy had ever come close. And the warmth of his body, the warmth of his cock deep inside of me – it was all so surreal.
Slowly, Deacon started moving back and forth, in and out of me. Fucking me. He looked at me and I could see the concern in his eyes – he was worried about hurting me. I smiled at him and moaned as he kept moving in and out. This was it. I was having sex. I was giving myself to a man and it wasn't Tony.
Just knowing that made me feel so happy. So – victorious. In control. It was an empowering feeling that I relished every bit as much as the feeling of having Deacon's cock inside of me.
“Fuck, you're tight,” he said through gritted teeth, his eyes shut tightly.
“Never been with a virgin before?” I asked.
“Not that I'm aware of,” he said, his voice more gravely than normal. “But damn, you feel amazing.”
And he felt amazing too. Once the initial pain wore off, the pleasure hit me with the force of a sledgehammer. Deacon was able to speed up, moving in and out of me with such ease, building a rhythm that worked for us. Our bodies were moving in unison – I rose up to meet each of his thrusts, burying him deeper inside of me. This was all so new. So raw. So magical. And yet, with Deacon, it felt so normal. So natural. So – perfect.
And when that familiar tingling started low in my belly, that heat rising up from below, I knew I wasn't going to last very much longer. He'd brought me to that brink again with such ease that I felt like I was still trying to catch my breath from the last orgasm he'd given me.
“I'm going to come, Deacon,” I cried out, digging my nailes into his back and writhing underneath him.
How he managed to keep himself inside of me while I squirmed so much, I had no clue. But he somehow managed to continue thrusting in and out of me, keeping a rhythm that was driving me absolutely crazy.
His breathing was growing more and more ragged though, and I sensed he was also close. As I came, my pussy clenched tighter around him and he let out a groan from deep within his chest, burying himself into me even deeper than before. I could feel him throbbing inside of me as he shuddered above me, his eyes shut tight as he filled me with his seed.
The warmth from his cum caused me to come again, and this time, I couldn't hold back the screams. I let it out, calling his name over and over again as together, we came.