CHAPTER 6
I slid my hands into his hair and closed my eyes as I pulled. Brett groaned, and I moved away just enough to finish the wine before I looked at him. “I’m already in hell so why the fuck not?” I hated myself as I kissed Brett, my stepfather. I felt like the worst daughter but I was suffering inside, and I wanted it to stop. My need for Cole blended with the memories that I had of Brett as he pulled against him and returned the kiss. His tongue met mine as he lifted me onto the table and gripped my ass.
Everything about the night came back to mind as I wrapped my legs around him and tilted my head to deepen things. Brett pressed against the seam of my jeans, and I remembered how well he filled me as I rocked against him. “Oh, God. Why did you have to be hers?” Brett mumbled against my lips before he kissed me again and moved against me as I felt shame filling my body.
I pushed away thoughts of my mom and pulled myself up as Brett stumbled for a moment. He dropped me back on the table and pulled away as he took a ragged breath. “What the fuck? I didn’t plan this,” he stared at me with his intense eyes before he downed his drink in one gulp. “I knew there was a connection with you that night, but we left things in that hotel room. But you’re here again and I…” Brett walked into the kitchen and poured more whiskey as the phone on the counter rang. He walked over and stared at it. “It’s your mom.”
We both stood in silence as the phone continued to ring and then went silent. “I can’t right now with her. I just can’t.”
“She said that you’re not close. She stated that there was a rift after your dad died and she didn’t know how to reach you anymore,” Brett told me as he stared at me. “She didn’t tell me who you were.”
I knew that Cole was out of my life now and that I couldn’t go back. Somehow, the men reminded me of each other, and I blinked as he drank a large swallow of his drink. Could Brett fill the void, as sick as the idea was? “We’re not close, and we never were. I was always a daddy’s girl and when he was gone…I felt like I lost everything.” I looked at him as more tears shimmered in his eyes, caught somewhere between lust and pain. “I didn’t even have a sibling to talk to and the one that was closest to that left me years later.”
“Jesus, Larisa. I didn’t know,” Brett said as he stepped forward and cupped my face before he kissed me gently. I melted against him, drunk more on emotions than the wine as he pulled me against him. I knew that I wasn’t going to stop this from happening and we ended up in my room, tearing our clothes off as Brett worshiped my body all over again as I cried through it, hating myself but loving his hands and mouth as he brought me close to the edge over and over. I was begging him by the time he slipped a condom on and moved slowly inside of me.
This wasn’t the heated one-night stand that we shared before. This was Brett comforting me the way he knew I needed him to and I pulled him closer to me as he thrust harder inside of me and brought me to an explosive emotional release as I cried out his name. Brett moved slowly through the waves as he sucked on the skin of my neck and then jerked as he came at the very end of my orgasm. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath as he rested against me and kissed my shoulder. “That’s twice now,” he said as I stared at the ceiling.
“Yeah,” I said as I stroked his hair. I wanted to feel terrible, but I felt amazing inside as we rested together. His skin was damp and warm as I felt his lips brush against mine.
We got up and went down to heat up the food, eating silently at the table with thick robes covering our skin. I felt like he knew me well now, having had me twice and I wondered where this was going to go now. I drank the wine in large gulps, and he had a few more drinks as I got to know him more.
I learned that Brett was a partner in a graphic design company here in New Mexico, one of the most successful in the country. He told me that the night that we met but I was drunk and couldn’t remember. Once we kissed, I only wanted one thing from Brett, and I listened closer tonight. I wanted to know him, for the time we had and the future, no matter what happened between us.
I talked to my mom, keeping it brief as she told me that she’d be back in two days. Two days alone with Brett here…I didn’t know how to feel about that. I finished my dinner and helped him wash dishes before we went out to the back patio and stripped our robes off to soak in the hot tub. It felt so good to let the hot water soothe my bare skin as I giggled from the effects of the wine and the way that he was making me laugh.
I thought of Cole later that night as I drifted off to sleep with Brett by my side, drunk on need and wine. I wasn’t ready to face what I’d done, not yet. I was just trying to feel good inside.