Lila
She wouldn’t let herself cry, not over him and not now. She squared her shoulders before heading back into the room where they were sitting. There was something about Ray that she wanted to avoid at all costs, and she had done a decent job of it to over the last week, until today. He had been watching her across the room and it left her unsettled. It was obvious that he was used to getting whatever he wanted and whenever it suited him, and she wouldn’t be added to that list. Especially now that Andre had told her they should see other people.
There should have been no surprise there really. He complained about her weight and cancelled every date they had anyway. How could they see other people when he never made it to see her? Either way it was the best time for her to shift her focus to working on herself. She just needed a moment to get over him, she had declined his offer to go out tonight, no she was either good enough or she wasn’t. She was almost glad when Miss Margie wanted to take a nap. It would give her the excuse she needed to get out of the house for a while.
After the was settled, she made her way back down the long hallway and into the room once more. He was sitting, almost waiting for her. She paused, but a second before she continued on, only stopping again when he stopped her.
“What’s wrong Lila, I ask as a friend.” He stood then walking over to where she was in the doorway.
“Nothing why do you ask?” She turned her face towards him and did her best to contain herself. Why wouldn’t he just let her go?
“I don’t believe you.” He moved a hand out and gently tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. She could feel the heat from his fingers, and it caused her to tremble.
“Why do you do that?” She couldn’t help but ask.
“Why do I do what exactly?” His brow was furrowed as he asked.
“This, touch me like that, flirt with me like you do? It’s not very nice you know to play with people. Is it because I look like this? Do you somehow think you can get whatever you want from me because I must hate myself or something? Well, I don’t, ok. I actually think I am pretty awesome and I have a weight issue, but you know what everyone has stuff that they need to work on so just stop… stop flirting with the big girl in hopes of making yourself feeling better.” She was bottled up too tightly and the smug look on his face when he had looked at her pushed her over the edge.
She moved past him and outside into the garden where she could find some peace. She would apologize later, obviously. For now, she just needed him to stop making her feel this way when she had so much going on. She settled into her usual chair, her head thrown back and her hand on her forehead, eyes shut. She had seen the writing on the wall with Andre but it didn’t help her feel better now. She hadn’t lied, she knew she was a good person, but she was more self-conscious than she let on. She felt him before he even said a word, somehow his presence filled up the space.
“Did you follow me so you could fire me?” She didn’t get up, didn’t open her eyes.
“Stand up Lila.” He said it with deadly calm. She blinked twice before looking up at him.
Before she could respond, he continued on. “Just do it… please.”
It was the please that let her do it, to move and stand up in front of him. “Ok, now what?” She waited under his heavy gaze.
“I want you to understand something about me Lila, I don’t play games.” He took a step towards her backing her up slightly. “I don’t say or do anything I don’t want to do.” He moved her even further until she felt her back against the large canopied trellis.
She blinked rapidly, looking up into his eyes. There was something there, something dark. “I certainly don’t think about you… or think about you in my bed where I want you for any other reason than I simply want you there.”
He put his hands in her hair then, pulling her mouth up to meet his in a fiery kiss. She felt his words and knew he meant every one of them. She let the feeling creep in now, believing his words and wanting him to make her feel like she was pretty. His mouth moved across hers, his lips nipping across hers, pausing only to move lower down her neck and to her collarbone.
The heat was intoxicating, as he kissed the top of each breast before moving back up and carefully planted kisses under her ear. She let her hands creep up, moving into the soft curls of his hair. Soon his mouth founds hers once more. Kissing her until she couldn’t breath. She felt his hands move along her sides until he cupped her backside and pulled her closer to him. One last kiss and he pulled away from her. Both of them breathing heavy.
“I assume I’ve made myself clear?” He gave her a wink. She couldn’t help but smile.
“Is this what you do Ray? You come home and find an unsuspecting woman to win over and get into your bed?”
“No, I don’t plan on it. But it is a good plan now that you mention it.” He smiled once more. “But then you’re not in my bed are you…. yet?”
She took a deep breath. “No, I’m not.” She stood to brush off her clothes.
“I want you Lila, in case I haven’t made that clear, I want to make sure you know it.” He said it directly looking into her eyes.
She wasn’t sure what to say to him, having never had anyone be so direct in all of her life. She simply waited for him to say something else.
“I will put the ball in your court Lila. I don’t want love and romance or all that. What I do want is you in my bed tonight. You come to me, no pressure. It will be good for us both, I promise.”
She wanted to yell, or be offended, but she couldn’t. He was simply being honest. She nodded in understanding as he left her there. She slumped into the chair her focus on both Andre and the man who had just left her going crazy inside.