Chapter 22

Rhett

 

I wanted to go home. I was really done with this place, with this family, and with the entire goddamn wedding. Now that I had royally fucked everything up, I was just done. I knew that I’d done the right thing by blowing Danica off, however shitty it felt, because I couldn’t keep leading her on knowing that we could never go anywhere, it wasn’t fair to either of us.

But the right thing felt like shit.

I was so tempted to call up my mom again, to tell her that I was leaving no matter what she wanted, but I just couldn’t quite face it. I hated feeling like a coward, and that was exactly how she made me feel last time. That bigger man nonsense had really gotten to me–especially after my dad saying that I was like him–and I couldn’t face that conversation again.

It really wasn’t long until the wedding now, maybe I could get away with hiding in my room until the day arrived. As long as I didn’t see anyone, I could hardly cause any more damage, could I?

All of my original plans went out the window as I felt my world fall apart–the idea that I was going to find something out about my dad, plus the novel plan to make things good between me and Danica again. This needed to be only about survival. I just had to get through it, and go back home. That was it.

But almost as soon as that decision was made, Lyla walked back into the kitchen having returned from her meeting with the wedding planner, with an idea that was going to kibosh my new resolve almost as quickly as I’d made it.

“How you doing, Rhett?” she asked, with an uncertainty in her tone. She was shifting awkwardly from foot to foot, which filled me with a nervous energy. She wanted something from me, and she didn’t like having to ask. This could only spell bad news.

Much as I wasn’t in the mood to make pleasantries, I did just because I liked her and she’d done nothing to deserve being on the wrong end of my bad mood. Plus, despite my reservations, I found myself intrigued–we’d spoken in passing, but that was about it. I felt like this was going to reveal more of her to me. “I’m okay, thank you, Lyla. How are you? Did it all go well this morning?”

“Yes, thank you,” She smiled at me, as she put on a pot of coffee. “It was really productive. The wedding planner is brilliant, she can really make magic happen. It’s going to be an amazing day.” I nodded numbly, not exactly having an opinion on wedding days having never seen one myself. “Of course, Danica has been amazing, too.”

“Yeah,” I replied quietly. I remembered all of the lonely days spent waiting for her to contact me, when she was embroiled in all of the wedding planning. I was upset about things then, but nothing compared to now. The unknown was probably better than this! “I know.”

“She’s been brilliant. I just feel bad that it’s made her so ill.” Again, I didn’t say much because I knew that it was mostly my fault that she’d been faking being unwell. “I hope she’s okay for the big day–her dress is gorgeous, it would be a shame not to use it.” She laughed, and I did my best to join in.

Eventually, she sat at the dining room table, giving me an odd look. Whatever her purpose was for being there, it was about to be revealed; I could just sense it. “Rhett, I know this is all a bit strange for all of us, but I’d really like to get to know you a little better if that’s all right with you. This isn’t to do with your relationship with you father; that has nothing to do with me.”

Obviously by this, she meant that he’d spent a lot of time talking down about me. Considering all that had happened today, this didn’t affect me as much as it normally would. Normally, I’d be raging at the thought of that horrible douche bag saying bad things about me, but this time it was like a mild irritation, somewhere at the back of my throat. Something that I would deal with later.

“And, you get on so well with Danica.” I didn’t correct her as she said this, sensing that it wasn’t the time. “So I wondered whether you might like to spend the day with us tomorrow. We could go out for the day into the city.”

My heart sunk into my shoes at her words. Oh God, how the hell was I going to get out of this one? I didn’t want to spend any time with anyone, never mind the one person I’d just promised not to. That was a disaster waiting to happen.

“Erm, I don’t know,” I replied lamely. “Have you asked Danica?” I hoped this would be enough to stall her for a few moments, but it seemed that I was wrong.

“Yes, she’s really excited for it.” She nodded enthusiastically to highlight her point, making me feel about a million times worse.

She was?

I was struggling to believe that Danica had agreed to anything that involved me after the shitty way that I’d treated her, but why would Lyla lie? She couldn’t honestly be that desperate for us all to spend time together as a family.

“Right, okay.” I was speaking, but barely aware of what I was saying. “That sounds great.”

“Lovely,” she stood up with a satisfied smile on her face. “We’ll go in the morning, then.”

As she walked away, I couldn’t help but wonder what the hell I’d allowed myself to get roped into.

I decided that the only thing I could do would be to get the perspective of an outsider–someone who could shed some unbiased advice on the situation, and there was only one person in the world that I felt like I could trust with this information. And it wasn’t my mother, not with this. She had too much of her own baggage involved.

“Hello?” James’s voice came blasting over the phone, but I could instantly tell that he was at some crazy party in the Alps. The exact place I would have been had I not been so determined to screw my dad over.

I could have avoided all of this if I’d gone. Sure, I never would have seen Danica again, but then we would only have good memories rather than this mess.

“How’s it going, James?” I asked, sensing that he was barely going to be able to hear me over the music. Now was certainly not the time for the heart to heart that I needed. “Are you having fun?”

“Man, this is the best fucking week ever; you should totally come here!” He was dunk and forgetting that I was already in the middle of something. It also seemed to have slipped his mind that I couldn’t afford things as readily as him. If I was given some time to prepare, I could save up, but there was no way I could fly over last minute. “Come and party, dude!”

I laughed loudly, trying to hide my longing. “I wish I could, but I have this wedding, don’t I?”

He slid into a quieter room, which made it so much easier for the pair of us to communicate. “Yeah…how are things? With your dad?” He wasn’t asking just to be polite, he genuinely wanted to know, making it much harder. I knew that I couldn’t just brush him off and that I was going to have to tell him something of the truth.

“It’s not great,” I admitted. “He’s acting like his dickish self around me, just like I expected.”

He blew out a sad sigh before continuing. “I’m sorry. Are you sure you don’t want to blow it off? If he’s acting awful, then is there much point in you staying and upsetting yourself?” He meant well, but unfortunately there was no magical solution to this one.

“Thanks, bud, but I really have to just get through this–for Mom’s sake.”

“Okay,” he drawled. “If you’re sure.” He paused for a moment. “You never know, there might be some fit birds there.” Oh God; if only he knew. I was quiet for a beat too long, which made him suspicious–even when he was wasted, James could see right through me. “Oh, I see,” he said teasingly. “There’s already a girl.”

“Mmmm…” I replied, in a non-committal way.

“Has it gone to shit? Is that why you sound so down?” He caught on far too quickly for my liking.

“Something like that,” I muttered, suddenly regretting my decision. How the hell was I supposed to explain all of this in a way that made sense to James when he was in a different country? I didn’t think he would judge me for my crappy decisions, but I also wasn’t ready to hear how much I was in the wrong. Not yet, not like this, not while I was still stuck here. “I’ll tell you all about it when we both get home.”

“Okay, man, if you’re sure.” He was as disappointed as me that I wussed out on being honest, but it was too late now. I was just glad that we were back on something of an even keel. “I’ve got lots to tell you, too.”

I rolled my eyes and smiled to myself. My best friend was a good-looking guy, and that combined with his laid back attitude seemed to have ladies flocking to him like flies. A fact that he took full advantage of.

He wasn’t like me; he wanted to have all the fun in the world with as many women as he could while he was young. He couldn’t have been further from being ready to settle down if he tried, whereas I was more sensible…well, usually.

“Go on, how many?” I chuckled. “And try to spare me the gory details.”

“Well, first there was this amazing blonde. Mary, I think her name was…” I tuned him out as he spoke, knowing that he was going to ignore my request and tell me far too much. Instead, I made the occasional agreeable noise, while I thought about my life out of this situation.

At least James had done one thing–helped me to put it into perspective. It wouldn’t be long until I was home and back to normal. Then it wouldn’t be long until all of this would be nothing more than a distant memory.

I was putting far too much stock into all of this because I was here in the middle of it. Taking a step back was the only way. Sure, I was going to have to face a day with Lyla and Danica tomorrow, which I wasn’t looking forward to one bit, but it would only be a few hours. I could get through that. And the wedding day would be a farce, but not for long.

I could do it. I could do all of it.

“Right, man,” I eventually spoke out as James wrapped up his in-depth account of his time skiing–although I didn’t hear much about the slopes. “I have to go, but I’ll see you real soon okay.”

“Sounds great,” he replied. “Miss you! Love you!”

“Go and get even more drunk, you idiot,” I laughed. As I hung up the phone, I felt much happier, even though I hadn't really even discussed any of my actual problems. All I knew for sure now was that I was going to be okay. I would keep my head down, be civil with Danica but nothing more, and then I would go home and I would organize my life from there.

Simple.