A few days later…
Gray poured tea into Jamie’s cup, noting a little of the man’s color seemed to have returned. Not that he knew what Jamie looked like prior to his cancer. “You look as if you feel better today.”
“I do. It’s been a good couple of weeks,” Jamie said before adding a light spoonful of sugar to his tea and stirring.
“So how was it good?” Gray asked, curious what made the man tick. What made him smile… what kind of papa he’d be.
If he had the chance.
“Well… I did have chemo this week, which isn’t great. But it was my last one, hopefully forever, so this one didn’t seem to hit me quite as hard as others. And I’m grateful.” Jamie lifted his cup to his lips and took a small sip. He smiled, his eyes widening. “Oh, this is good.”
“It’s a new blend from the little shop on Main. It’s supposed to help bolster the immune system, or so they say. After I sampled it, I had to buy some.” Gray pulled a small bag of leaves from his pocket and sat it beside Jamie’s cup. “I got you a little to take home, too.”
Jamie reached out and squeezed Gray’s hand. “How kind of you. Thank you.”
Gray smiled and patted Jamie’s hand with his free one. “Don’t mention it.”
He went back to fixing his tea, watching Jamie from the corners of his eyes. “You never finished telling me about your good week.”
A smile spread on Jamie’s face. “I got to see my brother Wilder, not once, but twice. He visited me while I was having my treatment. Rohan’s usually there, but he was tied up at work and sent Wilder in his place.”
“That was nice of him,” Gray said.
“Rohan’s very protective of me.” Jamie’s smile faded some.
“You act as if that’s a bad thing?”
Jamie shook his head slightly. “It’s not.” He paused before sighing. “He’s not completely sold on the idea of a surrogate. He’s worried about me… that protective instinct is flaring.”
Gray paused, his cup halfway to his lips. “Is he refusing to meet?”
“No…no, nothing like that. He’s just worried—as everyone is—about my health and moving forward. I seem to be the only one who sees that the end of this disease is upon us. You’ll all see it soon, though. Mark my words.” Jamie took another sip. “Mmm… lovely. This really is good tea.” He settled his cup down and smiled. “As far as the rest of my week. Wilder brought over DeNardo’s sausage and pineapple pizza on Saturday night and spent a couple of hours regaling us with what’s been going on at work. He and Rohan are co-workers—and great friends—which is a joy for me. Wilder is my favorite brother… but don’t tell my youngest brother Vaughn that.” Jamie grinned. “Do you have any siblings?”
“A brother,” Gray answered, trying not to let the pain hit him too hard. He took another sip before he answered and lowered the cup to the table. “Silver. He passed a little over a month ago.”
A frown creased Jamie’s face. “Oh, no… I had no idea. I’m so sorry.” He took Gray’s hands in his. “How?”
“A car accident. They were coming back from a long weekend on the coast. A truck driver who’d been up for almost a full day… he fell asleep. And we lost Silver and his alpha…” Gray felt the sting come to his eyes.
“I heard you say something about the boys… Tensen was rather tight-lipped about them. Your brothers’ children, I assume?”
Gray nodded. “Silver and Gilead left behind a ten, a thirteen, and a nineteen-year-old.”
“All left in your care,” Jamie said, tsking.
“Technically, left in Avery’s care. The oldest. As he’s of-age—he decided he wanted to become their guardian. He received temporary custody, and the family solicitor said it’ll easily become permanent. He’s very responsible, and now… now he’s been forced into being even more responsible.”
“But you still feel accountable? Is that why you chose to become a surrogate? To help them financially?”
Gray smiled wanly. “I’m still not sure I want to become a surrogate, to be honest. But I don’t know how else to make sure we stay afloat.”
Jamie was silent a moment. “The boys? Are they alpha or omega?”
“Omegas. All of them,” Gray said.
“The eldest… he’s close to mating age. Do you have him signed up for the next round of balls?”
Gray nodded, lying. He was beginning to hate being a party to Avery’s lie. “Yes. Of course. But as I well know… he might not have an alpha to rely on.”
Jamie frowned. “You truly believe you don’t have one?”
Gray shrugged. “I’m thirty-five and unmatched. Most omegas have found their alpha by the time they’re not much older than Avery. I’m… I’m not stupid enough to think there’s a chance.”
“I’ve heard of omegas finding their alphas later in life. It’s not impossible.”
“A chance in a million.” Gray smiled. Silver’s words whispered through his mind. I’ve never given up hope. “I’d much rather focus on how I can survive on my own than wish for something that might never be.”
Jamie squeezed his hand. “If you do this… and he is out there… he might refuse you. Are you willing to give that chance up?”
“There’s no one out there, Jamie. No one.”
Jamie didn’t say anything. He only squeezed Gray’s hand again. “Part of me wants to argue with you and tell you there’s a chance. Another part of me wants to give in and allow you to make up your mind… you’re an adult, and that’s your right. But giving in so quickly makes me sound selfish—you giving up on your alpha is good for me.”
“I didn’t think that.”
“I hoped you didn’t… but know that I’m not selfish. I want you to really think long and hard about what you’re potentially giving up if you agree to help us. I want a child. Desperately. But not one forsaking your chance at a future.”
Gray held Jamie’s earnest stare. “Thank you for that. I appreciate the sentiment—but on the sudden appearance of my alpha, I hold no illusions.”
Jamie held his stare a moment. “Okay,” Jamie said before taking another sip from his tea. He looked over Gray’s shoulder at one of the paintings on the wall. “Is this one of yours?”
Gray smiled. The painting was one of his favorites among his work. “It is.”
“That’s beautiful! You must show me more.”
Taking their tea, they strolled through the house. Gray showed off a few of the pieces he had on the walls… and then they made their way to his studio, where he displayed a few of his more recent paintings.
“My word, Gray. Tensen wasn’t kidding. You really are quite talented,” Jamie said, lifting one of the canvases before him. “Absolutely breathtaking.”
Gray wasn’t used to sharing his work—or receiving much praise for it. His face was burning. “Thank you.”
“Is it for sale?”
“Sale?” Gray asked, confused. He’d never imagined selling his work. It was only a hobby. Something to occupy his long hours alone.
Jamie smiled. “I’d like to buy it.”
“Buy it? You can have it.”
Jamie shook his head. “Absolutely not. Talent such as this needs to be nurtured and applauded. I won’t take one thing, but I will buy this piece.” Jamie glanced down at it. “Say two hundred? Does that sound fair?”
Two hundred renos for one painting? “That’s… it’s too much, Jamie.”
“Not hardly. Why don’t we make it three?”
Gray sighed. “You don’t have to butter me up. I promise it won’t affect my decision one way or another.”
Jamie looked stunned. He stood up a bit straighter and lifted his chin. “I would never try to buy you, Gray.” He chuckled slightly, relaxing. “Well, I suppose we are technically paying you if you agree. But that’s for a service… I wouldn’t attempt to buy your decision.” He looked back to the painting. “It’s absolutely stunning, and the fact you can’t see that breaks my heart. You’re so talented.”
Gray watched as Jamie stared at his work. “You really think so?”
“Yes! I’m jealous of your talent,” Jamie said. He tilted his head. “Is this the koi pond from Mill Street Park in the Family Quadrant?”
“What I remember of it,” Gray said, staring across the surface, longing to relive those days. “I haven’t been in nearly twenty years. I loved sitting there and feeding the fish when I was younger.” A smile played over Gray’s lips as the memories assaulted him. The warmth of the sun. The laughter as he raced through the park with his brother. He could almost hear the sounds in his mind—and how he longed to have the freedom to return there once again.
He swallowed back the sadness that suddenly slammed into him, harder than he could ever recall. Maybe it was because the omega standing beside him did have the freedom he lacked. Gray slanted a gaze at Jamie as the man began to speak and knew he had no right to hold on to any kind of jealousy. Not with the battle he’d just waged.
“Wilder and I used to sit on that little bridge and feed the fish on Sunday mornings,” Jamie said, laying a reverent hand over the painting, a soft smile on his face. He lifted his gaze to Gray’s. “It’s a wonder we never ran into one another over the years. I loved this spot. So serene…” He turned back and looked at the painting once more. “I need some serenity in my life right now.”
“I really wish you’d take it,” Gray murmured. “I don’t need your money.”
“You have three boys to help support… and new paint supplies to purchase… so you can continue making these brilliant works of art.” Jamie paused and looked down, cocking his head to the side. He took a step and then paused to glance at Gray, his eyes wide with joy. “Oh my… does that one go with this? It looks like the rose garden on the other side of the park.”
“It does… and it is,” Gray said with a smile. The fact Jamie could recognize those places was good for his heart. His memory had served him well, it seemed.
“I’d love them both if you can part with them. Do we have a deal?” Jamie placed a hand before Gray.
“I have a feeling I won’t win this fight.”
Jamie’s grin only grew stronger, with a hint of something wicked within. “When I want something, I don’t lose.”
Gray chuckled before he shook Jamie’s hand. “Deal.”
Jamie set the painting down against the easel and rubbed his hands together. “Show me more. I might need another.”
* * * *
Rohan came home to see three large paintings sitting in the foyer, propped against the wall. He lowered his briefcase and lifted the one at the front, his gaze drawn by the swirling play of color. Whoever it was, they were very talented. He tried to pick out the name scrawled at the bottom of the piece.
Gray?
Rohan frowned as a scent came off the canvas… one that had him growling and clutching the edge of the inner wooden frame.
“Isn’t it stunning?” Jamie said as he strolled into the foyer.
“It is. Who’s the artist?” Asking as if he couldn’t guess.
“Our potential surrogate, Gray.”
Rohan tried to hide the wince at having his suspicions confirmed. He lowered the first and looked at the others—all lovely in their own right. “And how much did you pay him for his work?”
“He didn’t want me to pay, but I insisted,” Jamie said before turning and heading back toward the kitchen.
“Of course he didn’t,” Rohan drawled as he followed his omega. “But he took your money, didn’t he?”
Jamie was silent as he pulled a container of sparkling water from the refrigerator and poured himself a glass. And then poured another before handing it to Rohan. “I had to convince him. He was willing to hand them over for free. I wouldn’t hear of it, not someone this talented. Gray needs to know how skilled he is.”
Rohan took the glass. Before he took a drink, he added, “You shouldn’t have done that, Jamie.”
“And why not?”
“Why does a surrogate choose to carry another’s child?” Rohan asked, setting the glass on the counter. “Because they need money. You barely know this omega. Be careful.”
“If you’d met him already, you would understand. He’s…” Jamie smiled. “Well, I’ve absolutely fallen in love with him.”
Rohan paused, his hackles rising. “Fallen in love?”
Jamie smiled. “Not in the way I love you.” He grinned. “No one will ever replace you in my heart. You know that.”
“So this love of yours is brotherly?”
“I suppose you could call it that. And shouldn’t I feel affection for someone who might carry our child? He’ll be the true papa to our babe. The fact we already have a connection is wonderful.”
“If he agrees… don’t get ahead of yourself.” Rohan leaned a hip against the counter. “And once any babe is born, he won’t have any rights to it. He’ll be ours. Gray will no longer be in the picture.”
Jamie gave him an odd look. “I know, I know. I just sense something special about him. I feel it, Rohan. This is the one. This is the omega for us.”
Rohan watched as Jamie twirled in the kitchen and added some spices to the pot simmering on the stove. “You seem in good spirits today.”
“I am. I even feel famished. How about that? I can’t recall the last time I didn’t have to force myself to eat something.”
“You had no problems eating a couple of slices of pizza this weekend.”
“I didn’t want to alarm Wilder,” Jamie said. “But I really didn’t feel like eating much that night. I made myself eat them since he’d gone through so much trouble.”
Rohan sidled over to his omega and gripped Jamie’s hips from behind. He left a peck on his mate’s neck and then looked over his shoulder. “Beef stew? You must be feeling good.” It did him well to see Jamie in such high spirits.
“I don’t know how much I’ll actually eat, but I’m going to try.”
Rohan kissed the side of Jamie’s cheek and inhaled his mate’s scent. Closing his eyes, he felt his body respond. He inadvertently rubbed his thickening shaft against his omega’s ass.
Jamie stiffened and pulled away.
“I didn’t mean to…” Rohan sighed, backing up a step. Of course seeing Jamie so full of excitement and energy had gotten to him. It had been months since they’d been intimate. Not once had Rohan pressed sex during Jamie’s illness—and he hadn’t been pressing just then either. It had simply been a reaction to being close to the man he loved. A man who was slowly coming back to him, it seemed. “I wasn’t trying to suggest anything. I was just caught up in the moment and excited to see you so well.”
“I can’t,” Jamie mumbled over one shoulder.
“You don’t have to.”
They were silent a few moments before Jamie turned to Rohan. “What if my desire for you never comes back?”
Rohan couldn’t breathe for a moment. The thought of never being intimate with the man he loved was enough to bring him to his knees. His instinct to breed didn’t end just because his omega wasn’t able—it wouldn’t fade for some time. He’d squashed that innate need time and time again, refusing to let it come to the surface. “I’ve never once made demands on you. And I don’t plan to now.”
“Now. But what about six months from now? Or a year? Two?”
Rohan was silent a moment. “We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.”
Jamie stepped closer, wrapping his arms around Rohan’s waist. “You know I love you, right?”
Rohan drew his omega closer, pressing a kiss to Jamie’s forehead. “I do. And I love you even more.”
Jamie nuzzled closer.
Rohan told himself this would be enough.
Jamie would always be enough.
No matter what.