Oliver just asked me what I want, and I’m not even sure. I can’t go back to the house. I thought I could come back and take care of everything on my own, but it’s become evident that it’s much more than I can handle. But I don’t feel like running away this time. I want to stay in Coldgrove… with Caden and Oliver, but I’m afraid of how they’ll react. I was hoping one of them would make it easier to let me know what’s going on in their minds. I’ve spent so much time being passive that even when I feel comfortable, I find myself falling back into my old patterns, but these past few happenings have shown me that I can be assertive.
“Well, maybe I do kind of know…”
Caden gives me a funny look.
“What?”
“Nothing. You’re just adorable.”
Adorable? I guess I can take it as a compliment.
“But go on. I’d love to know what you want.”
I shiver slightly, because Caden knows how to make anything sound sexy.
“Okay,” I say softly. “I think I want to stay in Coldgrove.” Once the words are out of my mouth, both Caden and Oliver stop moving their hands. I can’t tell if they are happy or disappointed. They’ve been succeeding at keeping their thoughts and emotions close to the chest.
“Where do you want to stay?” Oliver doesn’t look at me as he asks the question. His voice is steady and even, so I can’t even get a read on his tone.
I turn to Caden, who’s lowered his head so I can’t see his face either. “Well, I was hoping I could stay with you…”
Caden has placed a kiss on my shoulder, but I can feel his lips move up into a smile. Oliver is looking at me and he’s also smiling.
“So, you guys are… happy…?”
“Yes. Of course we are. Did you think we wouldn’t be?” Oliver seems almost offended that I even entertained the thought that they wouldn’t be welcoming.
“Maybe a little… I don’t know. You guys are secretive with your emotions and stuff.” I feel Caden shaking next to me and immediately know he’s laughing. I turn over on my side, so I’m facing Caden, and my back is to Oliver. Caden is resting his head on the pillow, looking directly into my eyes. “Do you think I’m funny?” I try to keep a straight face, but it’s not possible for me.
“I think I want to kiss you.” He slowly moves his face towards mine until our lips touch. It’s such a soft kiss; I’m afraid if I open my eyes, he won’t be there. That’s what this whole experience has felt like; that at any moment it could disappear, almost without a trace. I can feel Oliver shifting behind me, and I break the kiss to twist my neck so I can get a peek at what he’s doing.
“Do you mind if I join in?” Oliver asks.
Caden shrugs, which is his way of saying yes. I nod for him to go ahead. Oliver moves in even closer, sandwiching me tighter between the two of them. I’m facing Caden as Oliver pushes his pelvis against my butt. Caden has taken my hand and is kissing the back of it. I’m getting an idea of what they want to do, and I’m completely into it.
“Scarlet?”
“Mmhmm…”
“Would this angle be uncomfortable for you?”
So… what I thought was correct. Oliver wants to have sex with me while Caden is on the other side. I’d think the idea of something like that would scare me, but what I’m feeling is excitement.
“No, go ahead…”
Oliver peels my underwear off, pushing down my legs so I can kick it off. I feel him press his erection against my bum and it’s rock hard. The pit of my stomach tingles with anticipation… along with other places. Caden’s still holding my hand, and I can’t describe how much this gesture warms me. They’ve always been gentle and careful with my feelings, but this moment feels like Caden is finally opening up to me. They both are. We’ve been through a lot together, and it feels like we’re going to be connected by it from now on.
Oliver uses his hand to spread my legs, and I feel him positioning himself at my entrance. I’ve gotten used to their considerable size, so I no longer feel sore afterwards. As he slowly inserts himself, I squeeze Caden’s hand. Oliver has a hand on my shoulder to keep me from moving too much as he finds a pleasurable rhythm. Caden places his forehead against mine and plants soft kisses all over my face. All the hands on my body remind of the first time we were together. But it’s different this time. The first time was rough, illicit, forbidden, but now I’ve grown accustomed to the feel of Caden and Oliver. I love them. Caden kisses me when I reach my peak, and I moan into his mouth. I hear Oliver grunt out his release, and he places his head against my back. He removes himself, and I let out a deep breath.
“Is everything okay?” Caden looks at me as if I’m going to leave.
“Yeah. I just feel at peace.” I wiggle out from between them so I can go to the bathroom. I finish as quickly as I can then lie back down between the two of them. “I never thanked you two…” I say this hazily as I drift off to sleep. I hear one of them ask,
“For what?”
I can’t tell who it is, because I’m so close to falling into deep sleep. I lazily reply, “You made me feel safe from the big, bad wolf…” I think another question is asked, but I don’t catch it. I fall into my dreams.
• • •
The next morning, I wake up alone in bed. It takes me a moment to remember where I am. Events of the previous night come crashing back into my head. We all came to Caden’s house after deeming grandma’s place too tainted. I remember snippets of last night’s conversation as well. We didn’t deeply discuss the logistics, but the two of them said I could stay with them. Is it long term? We probably should have talked it over more. Things moved awfully quickly last night. Maybe they’ve changed their minds. After all that excitement, we were all riding an adrenaline high. I want to get up and ask, but I’m too afraid. As I’m trying to will myself out of bed, the door opens with Caden and Oliver entering the room, carrying trays.
“Good morning, Miss Scarlet Russell. Caden has prepared a lovely meal for all of us to enjoy in bed!” Oliver’s enthusiasm seeps into me, and my earlier anxiety fades away.
“Jesus, Oliver. It’s just breakfast. And you helped make it…” It’s funny seeing Caden embarrassed. I’ve noticed the easiest way to coax a blush from him is to praise him excessively. I get up so I’m on my knees. Caden and Oliver have placed the trays on their respective nightstands. Caden is seated so that I can rest my chin in the crook of his neck and get a peek at the food. It looks delicious, and, even better, smells delicious.
“I’m sure it’s the best breakfast currently being served in this state.” I reach my hand across Caden so I can grab a waffle, but I’m not quick enough, because Oliver grabs me from behind and pulls me into him. I’m giggling, because he’s tickling me, and it all feels childish. He brings his lips to my ear and whispers,
“Well, well, Miss Scarlet. You’re quite the eager beaver.”
Eager beaver?
“Eager beaver?” Caden also questions Oliver’s weird turn of phrase.
“It sounded weird as soon as I said it, but by then it was too late. I had to commit.” Oliver still has a hold of my midsection, but thankfully he’s stopped tickling me. I don’t know how much I’d be able to handle. I never realized how ticklish I am. Caden and Oliver continue to poke fun at one another, almost as if they’ve forgotten I’m here.
“Hello? Are you two going to chit-chat all day? I’m hungry!”
The look they give me gets me giggly again. I manage to wriggle out of Oliver’s grasp, and I take a seat at my spot in the middle of the bed.
“I guess we can start, if you simply cannot wait.” Oliver feigns annoyance, but all Caden offers is a smirk.
I smile at myself, taking pride in the fact that I’m getting better at reading the two of them. Soon, we’re all sitting on the bed, next to one another. Caden gave me a tray and placed a plate for me on it, and the boys took their trays to their respective laps. There’s some quiet for a little while as we eat. I put my utensils down and push myself to ask the burning question,
“So, umm… What are we going to do next?”
Caden gives me a quizzical look then glances over at Oliver. I’m not sure how to feel about this. Caden doesn’t say anything with his mouth full of food, so Oliver takes over,
“I thought you already decided what you wanted to do?”
I decided? I mean, there was nothing definitive. At least I don’t think there was. “I mean…” I don’t know what to say. It sounds like we’re all confused and intentions are already getting lost in a sea of miscommunication.
“You still want to live with us, right?” Oliver looks at me expectantly, waiting for an answer, but Caden chimes in before I get a word out,
“We’ll understand if you don’t want to anymore, but you kind of got our hopes up.”
I turn towards Caden, and he’s put on a despondent look; I can’t help but burst into laughter. It looks like such a put on that I can’t take him seriously.
“What are you doing?” I ask him.
Caden responds to my laughter with a boyish grin, “I thought if I look super sad, you’d have to stay to make me feel better.” His answer makes me laugh even harder.
“I don’t want to leave. I just wasn’t sure how long you wanted me to stay!”
Caden’s eyes flick up, over my head. I’m assuming he’s looking at Oliver, trying to get confirmation on something. He gives a small nod and then looks back at me.
“Well, we were hoping for a very long time, but we can settle for a decently long time… at the moment.”
They really want me to stay, full-on move in and stay with them.
“I think I can fulfill that request.”
• • •
The next few weeks are spent moving all our stuff together. There was discussion on whose house we’d be moving into, but unfortunately both Caden and Oliver’s homes weren’t suited to our needs. They’d never had any of their previous partners move in. We eventually decided to get a house just for us. All of us could get a new start. It didn’t take long to find the right one. We’re still in Coldgrove but less suburbia. It’s nothing too big or fancy, and it even reminds me a little of Grandma Rachel’s house. It has a homey cottage feel with the next house a decent ways away.
On moving day, Caden arranges to have all our stuff moved into our new home. The boys are helping load up the last of my things, and I’m standing on the sidewalk, taking in one last look at Grandma Rachel’s house. I would have liked to make this my home, but after her passing away, the struggle with the Blakesley boys and their father’s death, it started to feel tainted, almost haunted. The deeds to the house were given to another buyer outside of Coldgrove – Caden and Oliver are taking time off from the business, and we thought it was best not to hand it over to their father’s clutches, just in case. I will always have fond remembrance of my time here with Grandma Rachel, but it’s time to move on with a fresh start in a new home and make new memories, good memories.
Tears begin forming in my eyes, and I sniffle to prevent them from coming down. As if on cue, both Caden and Oliver’s hips meet mine, each of them on either side of me.
“Are you gonna miss it?” Oliver sighs.
“Yeah,” the tears are fighting me to fall down.
Caden turns towards me and sees my face flushing red. “Oh, Scarlet! Don’t cry! It’s going to be okay.”
I sniffle, “No, I know. It’s just starting to hit me now. But I really am happy that she can finally rest peacefully and I can move on.”
Neither of them says anything else as they wrap their arms around me and cocoon me between them, full of warm love.
• • •
The first night we spend at our new home is perfect. As I fall asleep between the Blakesley boys, I can’t help but feel hope for the future, which is something I haven’t felt in a long time.