Chris sat rigidly in the chair with his head bowed and his hands clasped firmly before him. His knuckles were white, he wasn't sure he could open his fingers he'd been clenching them for so long. But he was worried if he unclasped them, he might just fall apart. His head was throbbing with the pulsating emotions pounding against him.

The worst of which was Cassie and Devon. Cassie remained immobile beside him; her head held high, and her chin tilted up. The large, dark sunglasses she'd taken to wearing were firmly in place. He would like to think they were hiding her tears, but he knew better. She hadn't cried yet. Not in front of them, and he was fairly certain not at all.

The solid wall of hate she had erected around herself didn't allow room for tears. It didn't allow room for anything, especially not grief. He turned his head slightly toward her. He desperately longed to reach out to her, but knew he would only be rebuked again, just like he had been a hundred times over the past few days.

She didn't want comfort, she didn't want love. She simply desired not to feel anymore, not to care, and revenge. Fortunately, at heart, Cassie was a caring, giving person. That was part of what was destroying her now. She didn't know how to deal with her fury, her loathing. It was eating away at her, driving her deeper into her hole, and causing her to hide from the world once more.

It was destroying him that he couldn't do anything to help her. This wasn’t the Cassie who had hidden from the world before. That Cassie may have kept people at arm's length, but she had never radiated this hate. Chris couldn't tune out her emotions, he'd tried, but the force of her rage broke through all of his barriers to beat him down.

Chris shuddered. He was losing his best friend, and there was nothing he could do about it. She wouldn't let him, or anyone else, help her.

Devon wasn't helping him either. He could feel Devon, somewhere nearby, probably in the woods, watching. Chris could feel his distress and heartbreak as he was also impossible to block out now. Between Devon and Cassie they were killing him, and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He didn't know what he was going to do if something didn't change soon. He couldn't sleep at night anymore.

He shuddered again, his hands clenched to the point it was painful. His sorrow over the loss of Lily was being overshadowed by their emotions. He had loved Lily; she'd been like a grandmother to him too. She had raised him, loved him, and sheltered him when his own mother had been unable to handle the life handed to her, unable to love her son anymore, and retreated into an alcohol induced stupor.

A tear slid down his face as his own grief momentarily overwhelmed Cassie and Devon's, allowing him a brief reprieve. He lifted his head as the minister's prayer ended. His attention immediately focused upon the gleaming mahogany casket draped with wreaths of flowers. It hovered above the hole, Lily's permanent resting place.

He shuddered again at the harsh reminder that Lily would never again walk amongst them, loving them, caring for them. A sob choked his throat; he could barely breathe through the pressure in his chest.

It was chilly for November, but he couldn't feel the cold through the emotions swamping him. Heartache enshrouded the people surrounding him, some were openly crying, others stood and remained stoic. Even his mother had come, and though her breath reeked of booze and cigarettes, she appeared to be only hung over and not intoxicated. She stood on the other side of the coffin, her head bowed, and her sandy blond hair spilling across her shoulders. At one time she'd been a beautiful woman, but years of rough living had aged her far too early.

Seeming to feel his gaze, she lifted her head. Sapphire eyes, identical to his, momentarily met his. Though there was loss in her gaze, there was little else. She'd checked out of the brutal reality of their lives years ago. She wasn't capable of handling much anymore; she sure wasn't capable of dealing with what her son was, or handling the loss of his life.

Chris swallowed heavily, not only had Cassie been orphaned by Lily's death, so had he. He hadn't been close to his mother in years, and he'd always known he never would be again. But for the first time he realized that in his mother's eyes, he was already dead. To her, he was simply still breathing for now; still walking for a brief period of time, but it was only a matter of time before he wasn't. She had already dealt with the loss of her son; she was simply just waiting for it to come true.

Chris tore his gaze away from her, unable to handle the look in her eyes. Unable to handle the realization she already thought him dead when he was still very much alive, and planned to stay that way for a lot longer. Dani and Melissa sniffled beside him; Cassie stiffened as her head rotated a little to look at them. Though her eyes were completely hidden, he could feel the full force of her gaze on him.

Her jaw clenched, her face was unreadable as her mouth pursed into a thin line. God, he missed his Cassie. This girl sitting beside him was a stranger, someone he didn't recognize. This girl was so unyielding. All things Cassie never had been. It was as if the real Cassie had been abducted by aliens, and this was the thing they'd replaced her with. He hated to think of her as a thing, but that was what she was now. There was no trace of humanity in her anymore, no love. He'd felt many atrocious emotions from people over the years, but this was the biggest void he'd ever felt from another soul.

If she would just let someone touch her, and hold her, he knew she could come back. She wanted nothing to do with any of them anymore, and he knew all she craved was revenge, and death. He was beginning to fear she'd been lost to him forever.

She didn't even want Devon, the one person (well vampire) who had been able to bring her to life before. If she'd shut Devon out, when Chris knew exactly how in love with him she was, then what hope did he have of getting through to her? He'd thought Cassie and Devon's love could survive anything. He hated being wrong.

He still held out hope Devon would finally be able to reach her. The only problem was she wouldn't let him get close enough to do so.

Cassie suddenly stood, drawing Chris's attention back to her. He was surprised to realize the funeral was over. Cassie dropped a single red rose onto the coffin as it began its final descent into the ground. He followed behind her and dropped another rose down as the first shovel of dirt was tossed into the deep grave.

Cassie flinched as the dirt thudded against the coffin. For a brief moment he felt a flicker in her walls as anguish rushed forth to clash against the hatred. Hope sprang forth in him as he stretched his hand out to her, but he felt her walls slam back into place. Though he couldn't see her eyes, he felt her gaze disdainfully rake over him. His hand wavered in midair before falling limply back to his side. Cassie lifted her chin as she marched forward, her head was held high as she gracefully slipped through the departing crowd.

Though some people tried to approach her, she easily sidestepped them as she continued toward the waiting limo. Most fell back from her and didn't bother to approach as they headed for their cars. He didn't know if they would bother to come to the house. Cassie had been accepting of their condolences, but aloof and abrupt.

Luther stayed close to Cassie's side, but stopped briefly to speak with a woman before hurrying to catch up with Cassie. None of them were willing to let her out of their sight for any length of time. Chris didn't put it past her to take off on her own in search of Julian and Isla. No, they couldn't leave her alone; if they did it was likely she would get herself killed.

Mrs. Manz picked her way carefully around the headstones as she approached them. Cassie slid into the darkened interior of the limo. "Christopher, Melissa, Danielle," Mrs. Manz greeted as she nodded to each of them.

"Mrs. Manz," Chris said. Though many teachers, and the principal, had come to offer their support, none of the student body had arrived. Cassie had become the social leper of the school, but Chris had still expected at least a few of her old friends to come. He'd been wrong, and he despised them for it.

"How is Cassandra doing?" Mrs. Manz inquired as she glanced at the limo.

"As well as can be expected," Melissa assured her, though it wasn't true.

"What an awful tragedy," Mrs. Manz murmured as she tugged on the sleeve of her black jacket. "Will you let Cassandra know she doesn't have to worry about her assignments until she returns?"

"We will," Melissa told her.

Mrs. Manz squeezed Chris and Melissa's arms. Apparently if she couldn't console Cassie, she was going to settle for consoling them. "Take care."

They nodded as she hurried away, leaving them alone at the edge of the gravesite. Dark clouds were starting to roll in, a breeze tickled the back of his neck, and he detected the hint of snow in the crisp air. It was fitting a storm was rolling in as it seemed to fit the moods of the people gathered around him. "We should go," Chris said.

"Yes," Melissa murmured.

Chris shuddered as he huddled deeper into his coat; it wasn't the chill in the air that bothered him, but the one in his soul. The sound of more dirt hitting the coffin spurred him into movement. He didn't want to be here anymore, but he also didn't want to be near Cassie at the moment. He wasn't sure he could handle her anger anymore.

Unfortunately, he didn't have a choice. She was his best friend, and she needed him, even if she refused to acknowledge it.

* * *

Cassie stood rigidly in her living room, unwilling to sit down, unwilling to move. Though not everyone from the funeral had come here, there were still enough of them to make her edgy and unsettled. Most of the people were from her grandmother's church. They were her grandmother's friends, but she wanted them out of her house.

They milled about, eating the food they'd brought, and conversing amongst themselves. They avoided her now, apparently having decided she was beyond their reach, which she was. Melissa and Dani were standing by the dining room table, talking with a few members of the church. Chris stood by the fireplace, casting her looks that aggravated her more and more.

She simply didn't want his worry, or his concern. She understood it, but she didn't want it. Turning to the window, she stared out at the darkening night as snow fell in spiraling flakes. It had just started, but it was already beginning to build on the lawns and trees that still hadn't completely shed their colorful leaves.

Headlights swung into the driveway as Luther pulled in. He'd left shortly after the funeral, citing that he had a few things to take care of. He'd been disappearing for brief periods of time ever since her grandmother's death. Cassie didn't know what he was doing, and she didn't particularly care. There was nothing she did care about anymore.

She watched as he blew on his hands in an attempt to keep them warm as hurried up the walkway. "Cassie, maybe you should eat." She glanced back at Chris and shook her head. She had no appetite anymore. "You should eat," he pressed.

"I'm fine."

He sighed reluctantly before moving away from her. She didn't like causing him anymore suffering, he was grieving for her grandmother too, but it was best for him if there was distance between them now. It would upset him less when she was gone.

Her eyes scanned the dark night, though nothing moved she knew Devon was out there. She knew that as well as she knew the sun would rise tomorrow, the earth would turn, and she would still be dead inside. Cassie rested her palms against the cool glass, yearning to go to him.

She wouldn't feel so lifeless in his arms.

She couldn't allow herself to do that. He was the reason her grandmother was dead after all, to forgive him would be a betrayal of her grandmother's memory. To allow herself to love him again would only make what she had to do much more difficult. Her hand slid away from the glass. No, there was no room for forgiveness inside her anymore. She wasn't sure there was room for her inside of her anymore.

She almost welcomed the certainty of her death, almost welcomed the release it would bring her. She just hoped by the time it happened Chris and Melissa would have distanced themselves from her. She didn't want them to be this devastated, this hopeless and enraged after she was gone. Though she wanted a release from this frozen existence, she wanted even more for them not to have to feel this way too.

"Cassie." She turned toward Luther but ignored the plate he held out to her. Shaking his head, he lowered the plate. "Cassie, your guests are leaving."

She focused on the line of people standing by the door. The only thing that got her moving was the thought her grandmother would be disappointed in her if she was rude to them. She clasped hands, exchanged hugs, and murmurs and was greatly relieved when the last person filtered out. Closing the door behind them, she leaned against it.

"Melissa and I are going to stay again tonight," Luther said.

It took her a moment to focus on him; her vision was becoming blurry from exhaustion. "If you feel you must."

"We don't want you to be alone," Melissa told her.

"I'll be fine. Dani still lives here."

Dani shifted nervously. "Would you like me to leave?" she blurted.

Cassie shook her head as she stepped away from the door. There may be little left of her, but she wasn't going to throw the girl out on the street. "No, you can stay for as long as you have to."

Dani glanced at the other three, unsure how to take Cassie's answer. It hadn't been inviting, but she hadn't been booted to the curb either. "I think it's best if we stay," Luther stated firmly.

They were worried about what she would do if they weren’t watching over her but they couldn't watch her all the time. They would have to go home at some point, and eventually Devon would have to feed. Now that the funeral was over, Cassie had much more time on her hands to think about how she would get away. How she would carry out her revenge.

"I'm going to sleep."

Though she uttered the words, she knew they weren't true. She hadn't slept in three days; she didn't expect to sleep tonight. She ignored them as she wearily climbed the stairs. She had become a bitch, a miserable cold bitch; she knew that, she just couldn't bring herself to care.

But then all of her caring, her love, her life had all been burnt away by the rage festering within her. It was best if she stayed alone, best if she kept every one away from her. It was better if they didn't know how little there was left to her. Better they didn't know all that was left of her were smoldering ashes of the person she'd once been.

A person she would never be again.