"You have to eat."

Cassie lifted her head as Devon appeared in the doorway of her room with a tray of food in his hands. She felt hollow and exhausted, but she didn't feel the fury anymore. It was as if the tears had burned it all away and washed it clean. She still felt the burning thirst for revenge, but the inner rage that had blazed so hotly before didn't blaze anymore. She tried to find it, for it had been what was keeping her going, but she couldn't summon the strength for it anymore.

She watched as he moved into the room. His shoulders were set; his body tensed as if he was frightened he would scare her away. Her heart flipped over; tears burned her eyes once more. Tears she would have thought had run dry by now, but seemed endless. She had been so cruel to him, so cold and unforgiving when there had been no real reason to be. Yet, despite all her cruelty, he had still been loving and caring to her today.

She didn't deserve him. She didn't deserve many things, she realized. Placing the tray on top of her bureau, he turned toward her. "How are you feeling?"

Cassie shrugged as she twisted the towel in her hand and pondered his question. She’d spent over a half an hour in the shower but she was still cold. She didn't know how she felt emotionally, not anymore. She had been infuriated for two weeks, now she was just empty. She didn't know how to describe that to him. She didn't know how to figure it out for herself.

"You went home?" she asked quietly.

He looked down at the fresh pair of jeans and deep green sweater he hadn't been wearing before gym. "No, Chris grabbed some clothes for me."

Chris had been to his place? She had never been to his place. She had known Chris and Devon still talked with each other, but it sounded as if they had become closer than she'd realized. She didn't know how to feel about that. Though, she knew they’d leaned on each other when she’d so brutally shut them both out.

She rocked forward as waves of self-hatred crashed over her. "Cassie..."

She held up a hand to hold him off as he approached. "I'm sorry," she whimpered. "I'm so sorry."

"There's nothing to be sorry for. Cassie, listen to me, you did nothing wrong."

She wiped the tears from her face as she tried to stifle her sobs again. She had been crying for hours, how could there possibly be any tears left in her? "I treated everyone so badly, especially you. How can you stand to look at me?"

He came toward her and dropped to his knees as he seized hold of her hands. "Look at me," he ordered gruffly. "Cassie, look at me." She lifted her head and her gaze clashed with his bright emerald one. She swallowed heavily as love swamped her. He had been everything to her, and she had turned her back on him. She had blamed him for something that wasn't his fault, but was hers. She had cut him deeply, and there was no way for her to take that back.

"What you went through, what you are going through is an awful, brutal thing. No one knows how they are going to react when they lose someone they love."

"I was cruel though, mean..." her voice trailed off as she turned her attention to the window.

Her forehead furrowed as she tried to recall the way she had felt for the past two weeks. It was as if she had been a different person, as if something had taken her over and made her someone alien and cold. Someone she couldn't stand to be around, but had to live with every second of the day. She couldn't tell him it had been someone else in her body. Of course it had been her, who else could it possibly have been?

"I was someone I didn't recognize. But it was me, and I was disgusting. I never thought I could be like that."

His hands tightened on hers, his emerald eyes searched her face. "Stop Cassie, stop doing this to yourself, stop hating yourself. No matter what, I love you." She didn't deserve his love, not at all. He never would have turned against her, never would have hurt her in this way. "No matter what happens I will always love you."

"No," she moaned as she tried to deny his words. "I don't deserve it, don't love me. The people who love me die. They die for me, and they die because of me."

His jaw locked. "You did not cause your grandmother's death, and there was nothing you could have done to stop it. You are the kindest, most giving and loving person I have ever met. I will love you for eternity because you deserve every ounce of that love, and there is nothing you can do to make me stop loving you. Nothing."

His hand slid firmly around the back of her head, his fingers entwined in her hair. "If you turn me away again, I'll go. It will kill me, but I'll do anything for you. But you have to know I won't leave your life Cassie. I can't. Not when you won't take care of yourself, and not with Julian and Isla out there. I will be here for you until I'm certain you're safe."

Swallowing heavily, she couldn't stop herself from stroking his magnificent face. It had been so long since she had touched him, held him, felt him. Today in the cemetery she had been too distraught to feel the bliss his mere presence brought to her. But now, the peace he gave her began to steal through her body as it seeped into her pores, and warmed her soul. He turned into her touch, nuzzling her gently. He was a man trapped in the desert and she was his water.

"How could you forgive me?" she murmured.

"I could forgive you anything. You forgave me."

He took hold of her hand, keeping it pressed to his face as she stared at him in confusion. "Forgave you for what?"

He smiled at her. "For my past, for everything I've done, and everything I was."

"But there was nothing to forgive you for. You didn't do those things to me Devon; you are different now than you were then."

"There was plenty, you just never realized it because that is who you are Cassie."

Wonder filled her as she gazed at him. Maybe she didn't deserve his love now, but she would do everything in her power to deserve it from now on. "I love you too," she whispered.

Leaning forward, she meant only to place a chaste kiss upon his lips. But they had been apart too long, and as their mouths met she felt the instant flash of heat. A rush of love rose up between them, and buried her beneath the tumult of emotions tearing through her. Devon's fingers firmly clasped hold of the back of her head.

She knew instantly she’d made a mistake. Now she was accepting him again; his desire was more intense than she’d ever felt it before, and so was hers. She’d been wrong to turn him away. He was the only person who could make her whole, and ease the sorrow and anger that had taken up residence inside of her. Her mouth opened to his invasion, she welcomed him with a faint moan as her hands clenched upon his back.

The kiss became more frantic, more desperate. His muscles stood out clearly in his forearms as they quivered around her. His fangs elongated and pressed against her lower lip. Though they were a little uncomfortable, the feel of them caused excitement to spurt through her as she began to tremble. Cassie clung to him, needing something to keep her grounded in the chaos her life had become.

He suddenly pulled away from her, nearly causing her to fall off the bed. His head bowed as his shoulders shook. Cassie knew how he felt as she could barely catch her breath. Her heart pounded rapidly, her body tingled with burning excitement and unfulfilled passion.

"Devon," she ran her hand through his thick black hair as she tried to comfort him.

He shook his head as he moved out of reach. Tears filled her eyes as she recalled all of the problems they'd had before her grandmother died. They had weathered this last storm together, but there was a much larger hurricane still in their way.

She swallowed down the heavy lump lodged in her throat. She couldn't lose him again; she'd just gotten him back. Without him, her life was lost and lonely and full of despair. He was a part of her, and being near her was distressing for him. Cassie hugged herself again as he rose to his feet and strode with easy grace back to her bureau.

Grabbing hold of the tray, he turned back to her again. A muscle in his cheek jumped but he seemed determined to stay near her as he approached again. "It might be easier if you sit in the chair."

Cassie shook her head; her stomach was too upset to put food in it right now. "I'm not hungry."

The muscle in his cheek jumped more forcefully. "You must eat; you have to start taking care of yourself."

"Devon..."

"When was the last time you ate?" he demanded.

Cassie opened her mouth to answer, but closed it again. Her forehead furrowed as she tried to recall the last time she’d eaten a full meal. The fact the answer eluded her was more than a little troubling. She hadn't been hungry lately; she’d been too angry to be hungry, but surely she'd eaten at some point in time. She would have had to, wouldn't she?

Shaking her head, Cassie tried to clear it of her troubling thoughts. She must have snacked at least, but she really couldn't remember when. "I don't know," she admitted reluctantly. The tension in him notched up a level as his eyes scanned her face. "What's wrong?"

He shook his head. "Nothing," he mumbled. "Come on, sit in the chair."

She really didn't feel like eating, but she thought he might force feed her if she didn't try. Deciding to heed his words, she slid from the bed and plodded over to her armchair in the corner. He placed the tray in her lap and pulled the cover off the plate of food. She frowned down at the toast and oatmeal.

"Your stomach probably couldn't handle a big meal right now," he explained.

Cassie managed a feeble smile. She lifted the spoon and started on the oatmeal. She was surprised by how good it tasted, but she couldn't work up an appetite. "Are you going to watch me the whole time?" she asked as she picked at a piece of toast.

He eyed her warily for a few seconds. "I could use a shower."

Cassie smiled at him and waved her hand toward the bathroom. "Go on, I promise I'll eat it all, but you're making me nervous."

He managed a small grin before nodding to her. Turning away, he went into the bathroom and shut the door. Cassie ate at a snail's pace as she listened to the water. She wasn't fooled into thinking he would be in there for long. Focusing her attention on the oatmeal, she forced more of it down. It wasn't until the shower turned off that she realized the rest of the house was oddly quiet. Where were Chris, Dani, and Melissa? They had been her constant shadows for the past two weeks, but she could hear nothing beyond Devon's shuffling around.

The bathroom door opened and Devon's head popped out. His black hair was tussled and damp as it curled boyishly across his forehead. His eyes focused on her half eaten oatmeal. Cassie's mouth went dry and parted slightly; her eyes almost bulged out of her head as he stepped out of the bathroom.

He hadn't placed his shirt back on, the rigid muscles of his chest, and the ridged lines of his abdomen were clearly revealed to her. His skin was still damp, the glistening water only served to emphasize the carved muscles running through him. Her heart turned over as her toes curled.

Her forgotten spoon hung limply in her hand. Despite the intimacies they had shared, she'd never seen him without his shirt on. Now, she never wanted to see him with it on again. Taking a deep breath, Cassie raised her gaze to find his emerald eyes watching her keenly. An answering spark of hunger glimmered from him as his full mouth compressed into a line.

She dropped her spoon; she wouldn't get another bite into her, not now. Lowering her gaze to the tray, she was annoyed by the heat burning through her cheeks and creeping down her neck. She had been gaping at him like an idiot, completely revealing her inadequacy around the male form, around his form. She had always been a little embarrassed by her lack of experience around him, now she was mortified. He must think she was an idiot.

"I'm done," she managed to choke out.

"Maybe you should eat more." She shook her head, unable to meet his gaze again. "Cassie..."

"I'm good," she interrupted. Her mind flashed to Isla, beautiful, seductive, knowledgeable Isla. She wouldn't have blushed at the sight of Devon's chest. Isla had seen far more of him, and Cassie was certain Isla hadn't been at all bashful about it. Though she knew Devon had never loved Isla, at one time she had been exactly the type of woman he liked. A type that was nothing like her.

She heard him moving around, and then he was taking the tray from her hands. Her face flamed hotter as she saw he'd put his shirt back on. She truly was an idiot, she thought with an inward groan, an immature, foolish, idiot.

He placed the tray back on the bureau and returned to her. Taking hold of her hands he knelt before her again. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

She glanced at him from under lowered lids. She fought not to blush more, but failed miserably. "You didn't make me uncomfortable."

It wasn't a lie, he hadn't made her uncomfortable. He'd made her many things, but uncomfortable wasn't one of them. He leaned in closer, looking charmingly boyish and hopeful as he peered up at her. She couldn't help but smile at him. She had missed him so much, ached for him every day, and yet she had turned him away. What had she been thinking?

She'd been stricken with grief, but it wasn't an excuse.

"You look exhausted," he said as he brushed back a strand of her hair.

Cassie shrugged absently as she fiddled with the pleat in the workout pants she wore to bed. "Maybe a little," she whispered.

"When was the last time you slept?"

Why did he keep asking her difficult questions? "I've slept here and there," she hedged.

"You ought to sleep."

"The nightmares." She was haunted by the horrifying images of what her grandmother's last moments must have been like.

"I'll keep the nightmares at bay."

Cassie's eyes filled with tears as she caressed his cheek, she loved the feel of his skin beneath her palm. She managed a tremulous smile, she couldn't hurt his feelings, but she was doubtful he could actually keep them away. "Ok."

He took hold of her hands and helped her to her feet. Cassie was surprised by the relief filling her as she climbed onto her bed and curled up beneath the comforters he draped over her. The pillow felt like heaven, the sheets were deliciously smooth against her skin. Devon closed the door, turned off the lamp, and crawled into bed beside her.

His strong arms enveloped her as he pulled her back against his chest. She had forgotten just how right it felt to have him curled up against her, making her feel safe and loved. Her eyes drifted closed as the tranquility settling over her lulled her to sleep.