Ava
I couldn’t think straight. James’s head was between my legs, I was naked on the bed and I had no idea how we’d gotten here.
The one moment he’d been at my door trying to talk to me and I hadn’t wanted to hear what he had to say. The next, my body ached for him in ways that only ever happened with James.
I cried out, his tongue making magic and an orgasm building inside me. My body filled slowly with fire. This wasn’t my first time doing this – I had been with a few men before that had been talented – but this was different. It was my first time with James. And judging by the way my body was reacting, it felt like it was the first time for me, all over again.
He wasn’t just using it to work me up a bit, either. That alone would already have been enough. James carried on, his tongue against my sex, driving every rational thought out of my mind and pushing me to the brink of bliss.
He was going to push me all the way.
I shuddered. My nipples tightened, goose bumps spread over my skin and I gasped for air. Waves of heat followed the chill in the room that brushed against my body. My hair was going to dry like this – messy and without form.
I struggled to care. All I could think about was his mouth against my sex and what it felt like.
I shuddered again, my body jerking when he flicked over my sensitive bits. I had my hand in his hair, guiding him, pulling him as close as I could, stopping him from pulling away if he wanted to. I was caught in a pit of ecstasy and I needed him to take me all the way, now.
James had no intention of stopping. I closed my eyes and focused on what I felt. Lust. Pleasure. Desperation to let loose.
The orgasm started at my core and spread slowly through my body. My legs went numb and the pleasure gripped me, taking over my body and then my mind. My mind went blank and I closed my thighs around James’s head. I curled my body and cried out before my stomach tensed so much that the sound fell away altogether. James didn’t move away – maybe he couldn’t. Instead, he kept his head in place and guided me through the orgasm, holding onto my hips, balancing me between his hands and his mouth. He held me together while I came undone at the seams.
When the orgasm finally subsided, I gasped for air and breathed hard. I opened my legs again, setting James free and he lifted his head. He grinned at me and wiped his mouth with his fingers as if he had just eaten something delicious. My head lolled to the side and I watched him through hooded eyes.
He was still dressed. The contrast between how put-together he looked and how I had just fallen apart made me feel vulnerable. I had a terrible feeling that he was going to leave.
James reached for his lapels and slowly removed his blazer. He dropped it on the floor, not caring whether it creased or not. He unbuttoned his shirt and the item joined the blazer on the floor. James stripped, slowly, deliberately, watching me. I wasn’t a fan of male strippers – it always seemed fake – but the way James bared himself bit by bit was hot. He was giving me a show. He was confident, in charge, he knew exactly what he was doing.
When James was completely naked, I let my eyes slide down his body. The last time we had done this I hadn’t paid attention. We had fallen into each other’s arms and he’d disappeared before I could think about what we had done.
Now, I took my time. He had changed since we were kids. He’d filled out the way men do when they transitioned from boy to man. His muscles were strong, built like he trained now and then. His skin still had that rich sheen about it but his confidence and authority – more now than it had been when I’d met him – added to the masculinity he exuded. In short, James was a very handsome man.
My eyes rested on his sex. He was hard, straining against his own flesh. Dark hair covered his balls, the shaft stretching upward, smooth, the tip glistening eagerly.
When I looked up at his face again his eyes were glued to mine.
“What are you looking at?” I asked.
“You.”
He moved, lifting a knee onto the bed and slowly crawled over me. He settled himself on top of me, his hips between my open legs, his sex pressing against my entrance. I gasped. The feel of him would always catch me off guard.
“You’re really hot,” he said. “Your skin is on fire.”
“That’s your fault,” I said.
He smiled, pleased with himself.
His eyes were a bright green, drowning deep when he looked into my eyes. I had known those eyes for what felt like a lifetime. At the same time, they felt like they belonged to a stranger.
“I want to be with you, Ava,” James said in a hoarse whisper.
“You are,” I said. We were fraction away from having sex.
James shook his head. “That’s not what I mean. I know you’re angry with me and I have done so much wrong. I won’t be able to change the past.”
I shook my head. I didn’t want to talk about that now. Not when he was on top of me, his sex against mine, my body aching for his. James pushed through, though.
“I can fix the future, though. I can do right by you, Ava. I love you.”
I froze.
“What?”
James swallowed hard as if he had something in his throat.
“I know that I have been a dick.”
That was an understatement but I was too shocked to be sarcastic.
“But I lost you once and I don’t want to lose you again.” He took a deep breath. “I love you.”
He was being serious. James lay on top of me, sex so close it burned my skin, and he had just confessed his love to me. He had said those words to me once before but this time…
I grabbed onto his head and kissed him. I didn’t know how to respond. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t want to tell him that I loved him, too. I was too scared for that.
Showing him with my body was enough, apparently. James kissed me back, his tongue in my mouth, urgency building between us that had never been this strong. James didn’t hesitate. He slid into me, his size splitting me open as he plunged into the most intimate part of me. I moaned softly as he did, feeling him bury himself deeper and deeper inside my core until he couldn’t go any further.
I was breathing hard. His breath matched my own, our chests rising and falling against each other. I could feel his heart hammering against my own ribs.
James pressed himself up on his arms, putting a little distance between us, bracing himself. He moved his hips, pulling back so he slid out of me until he was almost out completely. When he slid back into me again I gasped. The friction was delicious. I was irritated, frustrated, blissful at the same time. My body had ached for a long time with an itch that only James could scratch.
His hips moved against mine and he pulled out and slid back in. He started slow, stroking my walls with his erection. I focused on what I felt, on every inch that he covered.
He moved faster and faster, bucking his hips against mine until the motion between my legs was a blur of pleasure. I closed my eyes and gave over to the sensation of being this connected with someone. Waves of pleasure washed over me as James pumped into me. He lowered his face and kissed me on the lips before he pushed himself back up and carried on pounding into me.
With the first orgasm out of the way, my body was sensitive, tender. I was hyper aware of every movement and sound that James made on top of me. I was reeling with the inebriation of sex, getting sucked in by the rhythm.
And I loved it.
When last had I gone about my life with this reckless abandon? I don’t I had ever been like this before.
Time and space blurred around me and it was just me and James, doing what we were meant to do all along.
After a while – I wasn’t sure how long – James slowed down and then stopped. He leaned down and kissed me again. He leaned to the side and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He held onto me and I followed him as he rolled us over so I was on top. We hadn’t discussed it. We were in tune, moving like clockwork.
I settled on top of him, making myself comfortable. He had slipped out halfway. I sat down on him and he groaned.
I pushed my hair back and out of my face. It probably looked terrible.
I didn’t care.
I moved my hips back and forth, riding him. James’s eyes closed, his lips parted slightly and heard him gasp lightly. This was what it looked like when the man finally surrendered his control. I watched his face as I lifted myself slightly and bucked my hips, sliding him in and out of my body.
My breasts jiggled with the motions, my clitoris rubbed against his pubic bone and ecstasy traveled through my body.
I settled into a rhythm of my own and rode him, giving him everything I had. James’s face changed from concentration to surrender. His face went slack and he was doing what I had done – surrendered to the sensation.
The friction on my clitoris, the sheer size of him inside me and the feeling of my breasts moving back and forth as I rocked on top of him were enough to lead to a second orgasm. My clitoris was on fire, my sex burning up. I picked up my pace. James groaned. My body felt slack and I struggled to keep myself upright.
The second orgasm came out of nowhere and I squeezed my legs tight around his sides. I braced my arms on his chest, trying to hold myself up. The orgasm shattered through me and I leaned forward, giving in.
The orgasm around James’s sex kickstarted his own and he grabbed onto me, pressing large hands against my back. I felt him jerk and release inside me, emptying himself out. I shuddered and jolted and jerked, too, moaning in his ear. His breathing was hard and erratic. I let go and the orgasm ripped through me. I cried out and fell apart.
James was right there with me. His arms were wrapped around me and we rode out the wave together.
When it finally subsided, I lay on top of him, gasping for air. His arms were slack around me. Our skin was slick where we touched. When I lifted my head, James’s hair was wet with sweat, too.
He grinned at me.
“You. Are. Fantastic.” He said and put a hand behind my neck, pulling me closer to kiss me. I kissed him before I lifted my body and let him slide out of me. I was sensitive, feeling him pull out just as acutely as I’d felt him going in. I collapsed next to him, a wet mess.
James sat up and reached for the covers. I got up and walked to the bathroom. If we were going to cuddle I had to clean up, first.
When I went back to the bed James had peeled back the covers and gotten into bed. I walked to him and slipped under the covers. My body gravitated toward his and I crawled onto his chest.
“Will you still be here in the morning?” I asked.
James stroked my back, his fingertips light.
“I’m not going anywhere,” he said.
I nodded. I wasn’t sure if I could believe him. He had disappeared on me before.
I didn’t want to ruin the moment, though, wouldn’t trade it for the alternative where he left now and got it over with. I wanted James to stay. I wasn’t done digesting that he’d confessed his love for me and I wasn’t sleepy yet. I wanted to rest a while before I climbed on top of him again and tested the theory that I would only ever be satisfied when he was the man that was beneath me.