“Hop in and I’ll scoot you into the water. Once you’re there, keep your body steady and use the paddles to push yourself through. If you want to go left, paddle right, and vice versa. I’ll be right next to you if you need help,” Liam explained while he pulled two blue kayaks from a shed that sat near the beach.
The property his cabin sat on was beautiful. The entire front was wooded with tall trees that had probably been around long before the little town they sat in was even built. They provided privacy and a sound barrier from the busy road that the long driveway pulled out to. Behind the cabin, the land had been cleared and beautiful lush grass led up to the modest, private beach they built on the water’s edge. Liam mentioned that across the road was filled with more woods that they took snowmobiles and four-wheelers around in. Each side had cabins that looked similar to his, but they were far enough away to keep the little paradise private. According to him, the families who owned them were friends of his family’s and they would share the land when they all came up together.
He described it like a distant memory, one he almost didn’t even believe could have been real.
After I latched my life jacket and hopped into the one-person kayak, Liam pushed me through the sand drop-off and into the water. Once I felt the bottom of the kayak lift and float, he let go and ran over to his, dragging it to the water’s edge before hopping in and pushing off, appearing next to me just before I spun into a circle.
His life jacket was tucked in next to his legs, so he was able to move his arms more freely than I could. When I squawked about having to wear one when he didn’t, he blew me off and forced me into mine, mumbling something about me being inexperienced and less coordinated than him. I pouted and flipped him off, earning a rare laugh from him that made my cheeks flush.
It took about ten minutes for me to get accustomed to paddling the little boat around the smooth, glass-like water. Liam woke us up early, so we could get out before the waves picked up for the day and it would be harder for me to navigate.
I’d always hated when people doted after me the way he did. Growing up as an only child meant I had two overbearing parents whose worlds revolved around my well-being. I appreciated them, especially as I grew older and realized that some parents weren’t even home with their children most of the time, like Cara’s. But I wanted my independence and I fought hard to get it. Once Cooper sexually abused me, it seemed like both my parents pulled their supportive hands out from underneath me and I was left free-falling.
So, when Liam cared for me, I didn’t fight him hard on it. He was providing me with support I’d grown accustomed to throughout my life and lost during the time I needed it the most. I also had a feeling he reserved that supportive behavior for people he truly cared about. Whenever I’d seen him interact in public, he kept his tone clipped and wore his signature moody, hard face. To be honest, sometimes he acted like a complete asshole, and it was the total opposite from how he treated me.
“I’m freezing,” I complained after about an hour of paddling.
The thin coat and light leggings I wore didn’t provide much warmth against the cool morning air. We hadn’t even made it around the perimeter of the lake and my arms were aching from effort. As it turned out, it was much bigger than I originally thought, so when he suggested we do a lap, I was horrified to find it bend and expand off into another circle much larger than the one his cabin sat on. The entire lake was shaped like a lopsided figure 8, Liam’s cabin being on the smaller end.
He looked over at me just as I rested my paddle across my legs and slowed down. I was so out of shape, it was embarrassing. Where he glided across the water with ease, I struggled just to keep my little blue boat straight enough to follow him, let alone maintain the same speed. If I continued to keep up the charade that I was in shape enough to finish, my arms would likely fall off.
“Okay, we can take a break and then head back if you want.”
I huffed out a breath and nodded in agreement, finally taking in the scene before me. Cabins of all sizes littered the coast with large trees surrounding them. Every plot of land seemed to be the same size as Liam’s, but each one had its own unique house to set them apart. Some had docks sprawling out into the water and I imagined that in the summer the lake was littered with boats and jet skis. It seemed like the perfect place to escape the hustle of the city and relax in the sun. Cara would have loved it.
“What are you thinking about?” Liam asked, expertly navigating his kayak to sit beside mine so we didn’t have to talk as loud and our voices wouldn’t carry over the water.
“Cara,” I responded sadly, avoiding eye contact with him. I was sure Liam had a negative opinion of her after the few times he’d seen her, so I tried to stay away from the subject altogether.
He watched me carefully, sympathy swimming in his stare. “You miss her.” It wasn’t a question.
“Yeah, I do.” I looked down at my hands and picked at the dirt on them as I explained, “She was my best friend before all of this happened. I know it’s my fault we drifted so far… all because I can’t get past that night. I just can’t figure out how she’s turned into the person she was back at my parents’ house.” I stopped myself, finally looking up at him. “I know you probably don’t care, though.”
“Of course I care. Anyone who’s important to you is important to me.”
He sucked in one of his pouty lips, chewing on the soft skin, deep in thought. My throat tightened, remembering exactly how those lips felt on my body just hours before.
“I know she probably doesn’t like me right now, but we’ll figure it all out. Same with your mom. We all love you in ways that may not make sense to you or anyone else, but they make sense to us.”
There was that love word again. He hadn’t mentioned it after we’d mumbled it the first time. I still wasn’t sure if he’d even meant to say it. But his loose use of the term had my heart fluttering in my chest again. I decided not to make a big deal about it, in case he ended up regretting it. The version of Liam I was talking to now felt like a gift I knew I should treasure while it lasted.
We paddled back to the cabin shortly after, my arms and core being worked out more than they ever had before. As we neared the private beach, Liam wasn’t even out of breath and he jumped into the water with ease, pulling my kayak up to the shore so I could get out on the dry sand.
“It’s always like this the first time,” he excused, noticing my flushed face and heavy breathing. That embarrassed me even more.
I kept my mouth shut while we dragged the kayaks back into the shed and headed toward the cabin in silence. Liam’s pinky hooked around mine, covering it completely. A small smile lifted on my lips and I kept my head pointed down, so he didn’t notice.
“Liam? What the hell are you doing here?” A feminine voice sounded through the screen of the back door.
My head swung up to identify the intruder, and I was met with two piercing blue eyes identical to the ones belonging to the man who stood beside me.
“Who are you?” she asked, her face twisted in disgust at the sight of me.
I wanted to shrivel up into a tiny ant and run in the other direction under her glare. Aside from a few years of aging, her face was nearly identical to Liam’s, and just as intimidating.
“What are you doing here?” Liam asked, his gentle tone from before long gone. The sudden change in his demeanor had me pulling my hand away from his in fear. Now I understood why people shied away from him.
“It’s my cabin. I’m allowed to come here whenever I want. Who is this?”
I was frozen in place, eyes wide as I took in the exchange before me. Liam wasn’t nearly as warm with this woman, who I assumed was his mother, as he was with me. I realized then I still had no idea what kind of relationship they shared. I didn’t know anything about Liam’s personal life.
“This is Luna,” Liam explained, stepping ahead of me to grab the sliding door from his mother’s hand and open it wider. He motioned for me to go inside and she stumbled back when I walked past her to get in. As I walked by, I was met with the bitter smell of alcohol seeping through her pores and out of her mouth.
Just when Liam closed the sliding door, a male entered the small living room from the adjoining kitchen. “Who the hell are you?” Liam asked him, looking between the two strangers who infiltrated our quiet morning. I noticed a bottle of cheap vodka sitting on the kitchen counter, and an overnight bag was opened and spilling out onto the couch.
“I’m Randy, who the fuck are you?” the stranger responded, stumbling over toward us with his chest out defensively.
I felt Liam’s stance stiffen at my side and quickly reached out beside me to grab his hand and calm him down. I wasn’t even sure where the moment of insane bravery came from. He terrified me.
“Oh, come on, Liam. What are you going to do?” his mother challenged, bravely stepping between the two men. Randy took a second too long before he stepped down, sitting on the couch next to the black overflowing bag.
“What the hell, Mom? Why are you even here?”
His mother walked over to the kitchen counter to grab the vodka before making her way over to a recliner next to the couch Randy’s drunken figure sat on, completely oblivious to the tension that was radiating off her son. That, or she was used to it.
Liam turned toward me and gently pulled his hand out of my grasp before standing over her, once again grinding out, “Why are you here?”
I felt her stare on my face before I saw it, and when my eyes met her angry ones, I sank down into myself. Shifting my weight from side to side uncomfortably, my legs were itchy from the sand that made its way into my leggings on the beach.
Searching for any opportunity to escape the uncomfortable situation before me, I looked up at Liam. “I’m going to change,” I whispered.
I rushed off to the bathroom before he could respond. I didn’t even have clothes to change into, but no one seemed to notice. Once inside, I quietly shut and locked the door before leaning against it and sliding down to the floor, listening to every word they spoke.