APOLLO:

What were the odds that after stage two of my amends, she’d come knocking at my door? If anything, I thought she'd have come in swinging. Better yet, I thought, she would have put Shay on me.

God, I tasted her lips and her sweet nectar. There was no turning back now. Not only did she come three times but she came when I slapped her wet pussy for being defiant.

Oh fuck, I was hooked and there was no turning back now. All I needed was one kiss.  She gave me that plus some. Lori Barrister would be mine and I'd do whatever I had to fucking do to make that happen.

We just bypassed phase three and moved to four. The general population of Manor probably knew that I'd apologized to Lori and now they needed to know, she was mine. Whether she knew it or not.

"Yo, Apollo," Razor called me over at the shop. "Nice job on that bike."

I grunted the acknowledgment of his words.

"For real, nice fucking job." He hit me on the back. "The owner is out of his mind about it. He wants to meet you."

"I'm good."

"Naw, you will be. Come over to the house tonight, he'll be there and I'm grilling." Razor nodded. "Could be a career changer."

The man was such a forward thinker it was sometimes hard to keep up with him. This made him a good president. The fact that he was a doer and a finisher made him a great president.

"Alright," I agreed.

"Good."

"Going into town," I told him. "Need anything?"

"Naw," he said as he headed into the office.

As I was strolling through the aisle at the hardware store, a few folks were looking at me oddly. Then an older lady walked up to me and asked, "You that Apollo boy?"

"Yes, ma'am," I responded.

"Thought so. I heard about what you did to a lady's yard near Baltic. How much you charge for something like that?" she asked.

"Uh, that was a gift. I don't do stuff like that," I replied.

"Well, ya should. Here’s my number and give me a price, ya hear." She whipped out her business card and kept walking down the aisle.

By the time I reached the cashier in the front, three more people wanted things done to their yard and wanted quotes. Immediately, I thought of Razor and what he said about career changes. It looked like my options had simply opened up out of nowhere or maybe I was being more open.

After I finished working at the garage, I called Big Joey to set up the meet. A fellow army brother, named Goliath, was stopping by but before he came I needed to handle some business. Around four-thirty and right on que, Lori walked through the bar and called for Big Joey.

When he directed her to me, sitting on the far end of the place, she visibly sighed.

"Connor, give me my bank card," she said with a sigh.

"I will. Have a seat and let's chat." I motioned for her to sit on the other side of me.

"No, just give me my card." She folded her arms over her chest.

I sat back and stared at her. God, she was so beautiful, even when she was angry. What was I thinking a year ago? What fool in their right mind would turn her away?

Me.

Not anymore.

"Sit, Lori," I projected the base in my voice. "We talk and I give you the card. That's the deal."

"I'll order another one." She dropped her arms and went to turn to leave.

"You never struck me as a coward. All I want to do is talk. We're in public, so you won't have to worry about me trying to kiss you or anything. That's what you want right?" I asked.

This stopped her from leaving and then she turned and sat in the booth where I wanted her.

"What?" she hissed.

"We've never talked since that day and I wanted to tell you to your face, I'm sorry." I put both hands on the table with my palms up. "Fucked up, Lori and I shouldn't have done it."

"We can agree on that." She nodded.

"I've been diagnosed with obsessiveness, attention deficit disorder and I'm sure I have some other shit I haven't got the official diagnoses for." Her eyes grew big. "I'm telling you this to say, I recognized the symptoms and even though you were over the top, I should have done something else."

Her head reared back. "I was what?"

"Over the top, Lori. You were spiraling out and you know it," I whispered.

She blinked and shook her head.

"Well, I got help," she countered.

"Yeah, sweetness. You did. Proud of you," I said.

"Don't call me that and I don't care what you are," she said.

"How long you going to be mad at me? Forever?" I asked. "Just want to know how long I should plan to beg for your forgiveness before I can take you as my own."

"Are you mad?" She gasped. "There's no goddamn way, I'd ever..."

She cut herself off and shook her head.

"Listen, we can play this little game if you want. I kiss you, you go and get engaged." I moved forward, so only she could hear me. "I make you cum three times and what next, you plan to elope just to escape the inevitable. I fucked up, sweetness, but you're fucking up now. You don't love that man. Why put him through that shit? You of all people should know how that feels; an unrequited love. So, Iet me be clear. I'll keep fighting for you, stealing those moments, seeking your forgiveness until you're mine. Those are my cards."

With that statement, I put my palms on the table and her look of shock turned to a glare.

“You think because you make some declaration of love, that’s all it takes. All things are forgiven? No, Connor, it does not work that way. You utterly humiliated me and for what? Yes, I was over the top, as you say. Yes, I needed a wake-up call and I got the help I needed. But you think all is well and forgiven. You think because I’m engaged now and haven’t thought about you, not one goddamn bit, that you can come in and sweep up the roadkill you left in your wake? Well,” she leaned in, “fuck you and the bike you rode in on.”

When she went to stand up, I grabbed her wrist and said, “Sweetness, you can be mad as a rattlesnake but I’m telling you, as the sun is yellow and the sky is blue, you’ll be mine. Every goddamn inch of you. For keeps. Want to know how I know, because we’re just right for each other. Fucked up in many ways, but we understand that shit better than anyone. Baby, you’re brave and I commend you on that. I’m a dick but I swear to you, I’ll spend my life fixing that shit. I won’t rest till I do.”

Lori shook her head, snatched her arm away from me and said, “Well, don’t rest. See if I care.”

Then she walked off and bumped into the next person I was planning to meet up with, Goliath. His eyebrows were up, so I simply laughed and said, “Now, tell me you got some wisdom on how to tame that.”

He shook his head and said, “Fuck, I came here looking for some wisdom from you.”

We laughed and talked some more about our women, trying to make amends or fix the shit we fucked up during the process. After a while, Razor and Bronx came by to talk membership with him. He seemed to be a solid dude looking for some good brothers and one thing was for sure; The Guardians were definitely that.

That night, after we all left Pepper's, I went to Razor and Kylie's place. The woman was getting bigger in the middle area and seemed to actually glow, if that was even possible. She said she was tired, so Razor carried her up the stairs while she protested the entire time and when he came back down, he had a smile on his face.

"Can see you're excited," I smiled as I sipped on the beer.

"Yes, I fucking am," he laughed. "Best thing that's ever happened to me besides Mace."

"How's he doing?" I asked about his first born.

"Great, we facetime almost every other night, since they have him traveling all over the country. He's having a blast." He sat down on the long sofa adjacent to me. "Now, what about you?"

"About what?" I asked.

"Your next steps. Seems like you can go a few different ways. That owner, he wants to meet up with ya and he's got a lot of rich, bike-riding friends too." Razor lifted the beer to his lips and continued, "My point is that you're skilled with your hands. Always have been. What you going to do about that?"

I laughed and said, "You always see shit about me I don't see."

"That's cause you ain't looking." Razor asked. "You making a move for Lori?"

My eyes met his sharp ones that always seemed to see right through me.

"Yeah."

"Okay, you have a shit load of money that’s in CD's and bonds from Guardian International. Including your work, missions, and our annual payouts. You have no debt and I know you must have a load of money from your time in the army. You live free and with that freedom, you have choices." Razor put down his beer. "Now, what will you choose?"

The man told no lies and yet managed to challenge me at the same time. I never looked at anything that came into my accounts or ledger with the Guardians but if I'd been with them for almost ten years, with no rent, car payment and the same bike that I paid for outright. I did have options, more options than I realized.

I left the President with more options and a small plan began to form in my head. Once I thought it through, then I'd act.

*****

LORI HAD A STEADY ROUTINE for the most part and Saturday's were her days to go grocery shopping. Therefore, when we ran into each other in the diary aisle, she said, "You do know stalking is illegal. I should know."

I actually burst out laughing at her comment until my stomach started to ache. When I could open my eyes long enough to focus on her, she had stopped moving and was staring at me.

"I can't remember seeing you laugh, ever," she said absently.

This caused me to abandon my cart and approach her. "There are a lot of things you haven't seen from me."

She blinked and took a step back. "Connor, seriously. Leave me alone."

"Not happening, sweetness," I replied.

"So, you're going to be the stalker now? They have programs for things like this when we relapse. I was just in one," she commented.

"I like my new obsession.”

“Well, tough titties, because she doesn't feel the same," she said while holding her hand up, waving her shiny ring.

"If you think that shit will deter me, you really don't know me. If for one moment I thought it was real, I'd keep my distance; but you and I both know the truth. He's filler." I stood there waiting for her to rebuff me.

"So, let me get this clear." Lori turned to face me. "When I was head over heels obsessed with you, I wasn't good enough. Now that I'm with someone and engaged, not thinking of you, you're hell bent on being with me? Is that right? You say it's not because I'm with someone, then what is it. What's changed? You feel sorry that you drove me to a looney bin? Well, let me ease your conscience. You didn't. I did that by spending way too much of my life worrying about someone who couldn’t give two shits about me."

She had no idea and this wasn't the place to tell her. Contemplating my shoes, I said, "That's not true, Lori."

"Really? What is it then?" she countered. "Cat got your tongue?"

She was in my face at that point, so I looked up and said, "Sweetness, you in my face like this, says something big time. You want it or just flaunting it because I can't have it?"

Lori's eyes grew wider then she took a mini step back. I grabbed the phone out of her pocket and programmed my number in it.

"Now, you have my number. Call me when you want it." With those final words, I made my exit with not one grocery item and a silent Lori watching me.