BEFORE SHE KNEW IT, HER FIRST TWENTY-four-hour shift was over. She had gotten a schedule that consisted of working one twenty-four-hour straight shift, with evenings off, then another thirty-hour shift on the seventh day, with days off, but working nights.

It reminded her of when Jake had started. She’d only seen him when he’d had nights off. But she didn’t work like an idiot her first month, the way he had.

She’d gotten angry, knowing he’d lied to her that first month. It must have been that married woman she’d somehow forgotten about. He must’ve bumped into her at the hospital or something, and they must’ve talked. He must have been with that woman while she was pregnant, while his ‘other woman’ had waited like an idiot for him to phone her.

She felt so stupid now. Her mother had been right when she’d said, “When something is too good to be true, it usually is.”

Two hours before her shift ended, she grabbed herself a cup of coffee, but for some reason, struggled to get it into her system. It was strong and tasted bitter, like no amount of sugar would help it taste like the cup of joe she enjoyed in the mornings.

Her phone buzzed and she picked it up.

Coffee is disgusting. I miss yours.

It made her smile knowing that she was at least good for something. Even if that something was making a good cup of joe.

We need to buy big travel cups, then you can take some to work.

Her phone beeped again.

Awesome idea. You’re the best. Adding them to the grocery list now.

She laughed at Rod’s silliness. 

How was the first day, Dr. Baluccio?

Boring! And no, I didn’t get to see the inside of a real, live brain yet.

Bummer! I’m sure if you flutter your eyes at TBG, he will let you scrub in soon.

Oh, it’s Macaroon now. So GA. Besides, I don’t think I’m his type.

Holly smiled at the GA reference. Ever since she’d known Rod, he’d referred to Grey’s Anatomy as GA. He teased her about it, too. He thought nobody’s lives, especially doctors, were that complicated.

Macaroon? Ha-ha. His loss, you are going to be brilliant.

She received a yellow smiley face with hearts for eyes.

Her phone buzzed again ten minutes later.

How is your schedule?

Not too bad. Twenty-four-hour shift today, day off, work tomorrow night, then nights all the way till a big thirty-hour shift.

WHAT? You lucky bitch. I worked the first month like an ass. I regret taking P&E now.

Holly felt bad that she’d thought about Jake having an affair that first month. So it was a P&E thing. Still, he’d left her when she’d needed him. He was an ass—it could’ve still happened.

Sowi, I’ll make you extra cups of coffee.

Hope you will deliver them, too.

She laughed. Love you a lot, buddy, but not so much that it I’ll go to P&E, she thought, choosing to reply with a smiley face.

Slumping in her chair, she closed her eyes, still having no idea where the sleeping quarters were. Her mind rushed over the past twenty-four hours. She’d spent almost the entire day in the ER. After entering, a resident on Dr. Embers’s program told her that everyone went through the same thing on their first day, so she needed to be on the lookout for cardiac cases and call immediately should she come across one.

As it turned out, she felt stupid when Dr. Embers found her, because she’d been pranked. Tanya had more than likely been the one behind it. Dr. Embers said she was supposed to stay in the ER, and he told her to get her ass back there. The tone he used was one she didn’t at all like, but she obliged. It wasn’t like she had a choice. She handled minor cases—fevers, headaches, and checkups—before admitting patients. Of course, she filled in her fair share of paperwork, too.

There were a couple of near heart attacks, and these she was good at. She was especially good at relieving fears, but she never got to show what it she could do, as a second- or third-year resident would always push her out of the way and steal the case from her.

She found Dr. Green smiling at her when she walked back into the emergency room’s lobby, looking extremely bummed out.

“You should show some claws. Maybe they will back off?”

She giggled. “I doubt that.”

“So what makes you tick?”

Holly laughed. “Precisely that.”

He smiled. “Good word choice, then. See, if you loved the mind, I could’ve helped you.” He started to walk away.

“Bummer,” she yelled after him.

She found Agneta, or just Aggie as most doctors called her, behind the desk. She was the one who had said the Niagellis were all the same. 

 “Uh huh,” she said. 

Bernie would’ve died a thousand deaths if she was here, which made Holly smile. But her humor disappeared quickly; thinking about her friend made her miss her.

Agneta was one of the nurses she’d had the pleasure of working with in the ER yesterday. Aggie reminded her of a mamma teddy bear you could hug, and she would make all your problems go away. It had been a pleasure working with her.

“You are everywhere, aren’t you?” Holly said. If she’d learned one thing from Jane, it was to be super nice to the nurses; they could either make your life as sweet as honey, or as hard as hell.

“Don’t change the subject. That one’s got his eye on you… and maybe something else.”

“You make me sound cheap,” Holly said.

“Heart, baby, I was talking about the heart.”

“Didn’t sound like that, Aggie,” Holly said, picking up the chart of the next patient waiting to be helped.

Aggie simply laughed.

Most of the cases involved minor injuries, as the second years stole all the bigger ones. If that was how things were going to go, Holly wasn’t going to see the inside of an OR at all this year.

The rest of the day went on in much the same way. After lunch, she headed back to the ER.

Desire came in at three and showed her how the filing system worked, what her job would be if she had to scrub in with one of the doctors, and what to do afterward.

At six, they had dinner. Holly took an apple to munch on for eight o’clock, just to fill that empty spot.

By seven-thirty, the ER was quiet. Some interns had left at seven, but they would be back at six the next morning. Holly was part of the lucky few who had to stay. She would have done anything for her bed, or any bed. But Desire had said  she shouldn’t lie down before ten in the evening. She still hadn’t shown her where yet.

Holly found the maternity ward on the fourth floor and spent some time watching all the healthy newborn babies through the glass. Taking her apple out, she took a bite. Since her daughters’ birth, Holly felt some kind of peace with newborns. She didn’t know if it was what they represented—new life—or whether it was because they were so fragile and so little that she felt needed. It put her in the ‘zone,’ as some would say. 

Why she hadn’t become a pediatrician was beyond her. Frank constantly suggested it, but she never saw herself in a ped’s shoes. She loved the fact that her patients could tell her what was wrong with them. Newborns—all babies for that matter—were so much more difficult when it came to finding out what the problem was. That had been the case, so far, in her experience.

“You are not allowed to eat in here,” a doctor reprimanded. She was tall, had dark hair, and was either in her early forties or late thirties.

“Sorry.” Holly put her half-eaten apple back in her pocket.

The doctor laughed. “I won’t tell. I sure as hell know they won’t, either.” She gestured to the babies. “I’m Dr. Matthews, and you are one of the new interns, I presume?”

“I am, Holly Scallanger, the one from Seattle.” She held out her other hand, and Dr. Matthews shook it.

“It’s so sad that Seattle Grace lost their title. I was a resident there.”

“You were?”

“Yes, Dr. Edwards was one of my mentors.”

“I know him well; my mom is a nurse there.”

“Oh, good for her. So, what is it you want to do, Dr. Scallanger?”

“Cardiology, but for some reason I love watching newborn babies.”

“Me, too, which is why I became a pediatrician,” she said as she walked away.

Since no one else was around, Holly took out her apple and finished it. Returning to the ER at around eight-fifteen, she sat behind the reception desk, along with Rev, who was playing with a stress ball, tossing it up into the air.

“Favorite food?” he asked.

“Salad,” Holly joked.

“Really?”

She laughed. “No, but I absolutely love that look you guys give when I say it. Burger, fries, and light beer.”

“That’s more like it.”

“Smoke?” He queried, lifting a brow.

“No, ew.”

“Never?”

“I used to, but I’m so glad I kicked that habit.”

“Weed?”

“Twice. Even worse.”

He laughed.

“Kid’s name?”

“No. Forget I have one, okay? I don’t want people to know I have a child.”

“Why not?”

“Because they look at you funny. Like, why isn’t she with you, and all that crap.”

“She’s not with you?” His face became serious.

“See,” she said.

“It’s not like that.” He rearranged his facial expression quickly.

“No, she’s back in Seattle with my mom.”

“Not so bad. My mom worked hard, too, especially after my dad left. It’s part of life, Holly.”

She smiled, knowing what that was like and could relate. “Fine. Her name is Jamie, but keep it to yourself, please.”

He looked at his watch and grunted. “This is so boring.”

“Tell me about it.” 

“So, you live in the motel down the street, too?”

She squinted at him. Rev was looking for a place to stay. “Nope, I live in a huge fire station that was turned into a five-bedroom apartment. If you’re super nice, I’ll let you rent one of the rooms.” She rested her head on the edge of the chair, and with her feet touching the floor, she spun around.

He stopped her chair and spun it to face him.

Holly opened her eyes.

“You’re fucking kidding me, seriously?”

She giggled. “Yes, I don’t know how much Rod is charging, but I’m sure it can’t be that much.”

“Who’s Rod?” he asked.

“My husband.”

“You’re married, too?”

“No, idiot. He’s my roommate, and no relation, okay?” She laughed.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” he repeated heavenward, which only made her smile again. 

At least she’d made one person happy today. Taking her phone out, she sent Rod a message.

I found a roomie. He’s cute.

Her phone buzzed.

How cute?

At least an eight.

Then… it’s his.

Holly snorted. “The room is yours, if you want it.”

“Can I move in tomorrow?”

“If you want.”

“Yes!” he shouted, pumping the air with his fist.

Following his excitement, Rev left Holly on her own to wander around the ER.

She must have dozed off; she awoke to frantic shouts. The ER was buzzing with activity from a head-on collision that involved five passengers. Holly was needed. Blood and guts were literally spewed everywhere.

Rev rushed in. They both began working on one of the patients, cleaning up as much of the blood as they could, trying to locate all possible wounds and doing their best to keep the patient calm until a doctor was available. As they waited, they took blood to send to the lab, as required by strict hospital rules.

Shocked, Holly couldn’t believe her ears when they were both ordered to scrub in. Dr. Green and another heart surgeon, Dr. Jacobs, whose name was reflected on the white coat, arrived to take the patient to the OR. She was finally going to see the inside of an OR.

Her adrenaline levels hit the roof. She was pumped with all the action around her. The patient went into cardiac arrest, blood spewed in every direction, doctors and nurses hurried back and forth—it was crazy. But that was precisely what she’d been looking forward to, not that she wanted any patient to suffer longer than was necessary, but being in the OR, helping, meant that she was learning—and that was a good thing. After an excruciating struggle, the patient survived.

They walked out of the ER at eight in the morning, both beyond exhausted, but on a high from the rush.

“Great job, Dr. Scallanger,” Dr. Jacobs acknowledged.

Thanking him, Holly filled in the chart, making notes on the procedure as she remembered them, while Dr. Green filled in his own chart. Rev had wanted to do it, but Oliver Green was somewhat of a perfectionist.

Rev waited for Holly to finish with her chart, and when she went to file it, she asked Dr. Green if she could file his, too.

“Go home, Dr. Scallanger.” He flashed her a smile.

Joining Rev, they made their way to the locker rooms, cleaned up and changed, and then she took him to his new home.

Rev’s eyes grew as he lowered his head to see better through the windshield when they neared the fire station. “This is fucking awesome,” he said, stretching the sentence out, as she got out of his car.

Smiling tiredly, Holly motioned for Rev to follow her up the stairs, but her exhaustion was showing as she rattled the keys, trying to find the correct one. When she did, she opened the door and revealed a still-unfurnished, spacious apartment. 

“I’ll get you a key as soon as I wake up, then I’ll get the electricity turned on. Promise.”

“Cold shower?”

“Sorry, Rev.”

“Fine by me.” He winked, walking toward the window to peer outside.

A young, tiny, brown-haired girl walked into the lounge, with only a towel covering her body, and one on her head.

Holly stared at her. She wasn’t the only one; she could feel Rev watching the girl, too. Holly could just imagine what was going through that head of his.

“You must be Holly, right?” the girl asked, holding her hand out to her. “I’m Julia. Rodney said it was fine if I took one of the rooms.”

“Hi, Julia. Great. This is Rev, by the way, and he’s going to take one of the other rooms. We just need one more person.”

Julia shook her head. “Nope, it’s already taken. By Bridgette.”

“Got it,” Holly said. “I’m off to bed, then. Are you going to be okay to find it again from the motel?” She asked Rev, to which he nodded.

“Awesome. Here.” She threw him her keys. “I’m off to bed. Happy moving, Rev.”

“Thanks, Holly.”

She left Rev and Julia to their own devices. They started to chat amongst themselves. She walked to the end of the hall where her room, one of the most amazing ones, was situated. Rod had taken the other large room with an en suite bathroom. Julia, Rev, and Bridgette would have to share a bathroom. Luckily, that wasn’t her problem.

She toed off her shoes and fell onto her bed, feeling satisfied. She’d been in the OR during her very first shift when all the others were sleeping, and it turned out to be everything she’d ever dreamed of.

For some reason, Jake flew through her mind again. She knew that the image her mind remembered wasn’t doing him any justice; she couldn’t remember his smile anymore, or how he used to smell. She couldn’t even remember the sound of his voice, just that it was manly, and that she loved every single ounce of him.

Her heart still ached over the fact that he’d turned out to be such a coward. Pathetically, she still missed him, but there was absolutely nothing she could do about that now. He was getting married and she had to try her utmost not to bump into him. He could never find out where she worked.

Holly would have to endure the stories Rod would share with her—he would find a way to get Jake to notice him. He was that good.

On that thought, Holly felt herself slipping into the dream world.