Liv
Sneaking out of Damon’s bedroom for the fourth night in a row, I find myself smiling at how well this is all turning out. In the morning we’ll have the results, and then I can take him to the estate and show him what he’ll be living in. I’m giddy about showing him everything, including the bank account.
I just hope he doesn’t get pissed when I make him sign the paper that has the stipulations on it. So far, he’s enjoyed Harold. I don’t think he’ll even contemplate leaving the child to go back to the military.
And I’m equally as hopeful that he won’t want to end things with me.
The man is a monster in the bedroom. He makes me do shit I’ve never thought about before. Used positions I thought were impossible. And made me have orgasms that went on and on, with incredible intensity.
Yeah, I’ll be pretty upset if he ends things with me.
Just as I pull on a nightgown and slip under my blankets, a knock comes to the bedroom door. “Liv, can I come in?”
I can’t believe he’s come to my bedroom!
He’s taken me to his each night, but never came to mine when I left him. So I hurry to allow him in, “Of course, Damon.”
Wearing his tight black briefs, he comes in, his body a hulking, dark shadow. Not climbing into my bed as I thought he would, he stands at the side of it. “Can we talk?”
“Sure, climb in.”
He shakes his head and sits on the side of the bed. When I reach over to turn on the lamp, he stops me. “I can say this better in the dark.”
“Damon, you’re kind of freaking me out.”
He pulls my hand up and kisses the top of it, then places it on the bed and lets it go. “Liv, I’m not this guy. I’m not a father and what we’re doing is getting confusing as hell. It’s like we’re a little family and I don’t want that. I don’t want it at all.”
Sitting up, I feel as if I’ve been punched in the stomach. “Listen, Damon, I know you haven’t ever been committed to anyone. But you can do this. I won’t hold you to me, but to Harry, I will.”
“I can’t do it, Liv.”
Taking his hand, I hold it tightly in mine. “You can. You’ve done great with Harry. He loves you, Damon. Don’t let fear get in your way.”
“Fear?” he asks as he shakes his head. “It’s not how you think. I’m not afraid for me. I’m afraid for Harry and you. I can’t be this man you want me to be and that Harry needs me to be.”
“So far you’ve been fine. Why now? Because the results are about to be in? Because I can tell you something that might help you. I was holding back until the results were in, but I can let you in on what you’ll be getting. Your life is about to really change, Damon.”
Leaning close to me, he whispers, “What have you been keeping from me?”
Taking both of his hands, I tell him what I’ve been holding back. “Damon, you’ll be a billionaire, with an estate, twenty-six automobiles, a private jet, and a stable full of horses. Add that to the profits you’ll be receiving quarterly from the candy business, and you don’t ever have to go back to the Navy again. You can spend your life with your son. And me, if you want.”
Shaking his head, I’m sure in what has to be disbelief, he says, “No, Liv. No. I can’t. I can’t leave my work. I can’t be a father. I don’t know how to. All I know is my work. And I’ll hurt you. I know I will. I’m a womanizer, Liv. You know I am. But I have to know this. If I leave, even if I am Harry’s father, will you take care of him?”
“I told you before, I’m his Godmother. I’m going to be in his life no matter what. But I want you to know that I’m not some bimbo that’ll let you do whatever the fuck you want to. I’ve already written up papers that stipulate certain things to make sure you take care of your son.”
“Things like what?” he asks as he pulls his hands out of mine.
“Things like you can’t be away from him for any longer than one month at a time.”
“And if I am?” he asks as I watch the shadows of his face move into a frown.
“Then you’ll lose the money. You’ll lose access to all of it. You were given this to help Harold. It’s not about you. It’s all about him. If you make the wrong decision, you won’t just hurt him, you’ll hurt the chance for you to live like a king.”
“So it’s a bribe.” He gets up and I get out of bed to go to him.
“It’s not a bribe,” I tell him as I reach out and take his arm, making him stay.
He turns to look at me and asks, “What made Genevieve think she could control my life? What makes you think you can?”
“No one wants to control your life, Damon. You have a son …”
He stops me. “Might have a son. You don’t know that for a fact yet.”
“You’re right. I don’t. If you have a son, then you owe him more than five days out of your life. You have to agree to that.”
“I don’t owe anyone anything. She had him without telling me. Genevieve had my information, and she could’ve told me in the beginning. If anyone is owed a thing, it’s me. I lost four years of that kid’s life because of her.”
“And you have every right to be angry about that. And you can be as mad as you want to. You can let anger take you over and make you do stupid things. Or you can be thankful that she wanted you to know him and made it possible for you and him to be a family. I suppose it’s all up to you. But you must know this: I won’t stand back and let it all happen if you decide to leave him.”
“And what do you think you can do about it, Liv?”
“Make life difficult for you in any way I deem fit.”
“Do you have an inner bitch who resides in you that you’ve not made me aware of?” he asks as he looks directly into my eyes.
With a blink, I break the stare as I answer him, “Yes, I do. And believe me, you don’t want to meet her. Do yourself a favor and just roll with what comes your way. Whatever that may be.”
“You’re kind of scary, Liv.”
“Look, I don’t want to be this way. I just love that kid and made a vow to protect him and help make his life as good as it can be. That’s all. Don’t let your imagination make it into any more than that. He has no mother. I’m like his Momma bear. Just don’t hurt him and things will be great.”
“And if you and I don’t work out?” he asks as he grips my arm.
I look at his hold on me and then at him. “Damon, if you and I don’t work out, that doesn’t matter at all. I’ll still be in Harold’s life and in his corner, always.”
“If I marry someone els,e they may see you as a threat,” he says, and it makes a sharp pain stab at my heart.
“Really, Damon! Why do you have to go there? At this point, that doesn’t matter. And if some woman you marry does see me as a threat then that’s for you to fix. I’ll always be in Harold’s life. That’ll never change. So you and anyone you bring into your life will have to deal with that.”
“Do you live at the estate?”
“I do. But I can move out if you want me to.”
He looks me over then runs his hands over his head. “This is insane! I feel so damn odd. I don’t like change and this is way too much.”
Suddenly, I’m pissed. “You know what, Damon, you took me, without asking me a thing, and you fucked me. You’re the one who made this situation into something harder than it had to be!”
“Don’t act like you didn’t want it!” he throws back at me. “Every fucking night, you’ve wanted it!”
“And I still do. But I don’t want to be the reason you walk away from your kid. If you’re afraid of me thinking we’re in a relationship, and you can never fuck anyone else, then think again. My primary objective is helping you and Harold integrate into a father and son. I can stop fucking you if that’s what it takes.”
“But you’ll always be part of our lives if I stay,” he says then turns away from me.
“You’re picking at anything you can to make yourself believe this will never work. I don’t think there’s a damn thing I can say that you won’t warp to fit what you really want. And that’s to walk away from us both, pretending you just can’t do this. You just can’t be a father and a boyfriend.”
He turns back and I can see anger flash in his dark eyes. “I’ve never been either! What you’re asking for is too much!”
Crossing my arms over my chest, I sigh as I look at a frightened little boy, instead of a grown and completely capable man. “Get used to it, baby. That’s what being a parent is all about—being asked over and over again for things you didn’t know you could do or even ever wanted to do.”
“I’m going back to bed, Liv. You’ve given me even more to think about. And just so you know, I don’t have to accept anything. I can sign my rights over to the kid. He’s a rich kid. If you don’t take him, someone else will. Someone who knows how to be a father. Goodnight.” He closes the door behind him and I’m left fuming mad.
He cannot just walk away like that!