Damon
My alarm goes off at four-thirty, the way it does every morning, and I get up to start my exercise regimen. As I turn on the overhead light, I see that a piece of paper has been slipped under my door.
With a sigh, I pick it up, ready to read a bunch of hostile stuff from Liv. I was truthful with her last night, and that’s going to bite me in the ass now, I’m sure.
Why can’t women just accept men for who they are and not try to change them all the damn time?
Unfolding the page, I see she starts with an endearment.
Baby,
I was furious when you left me standing there, watching you go, and feeling helpless. It was at that moment that I realized just exactly how you must feel. Helpless.
My heart broke at that moment. And I was sorry for ever feeling anger at you.
You’re only human. Sure, you look like a God from another world, but you really are just a man. A man with faults and insecurities just like any other man, or woman for that matter.
My life changed when Genevieve contacted me, asking me to come to London and then asking me to stay on so I could help her son. I think she must’ve had a premonition about her death that she never wanted to tell me she’d had. I don’t know. But I do know this: that kid needs me.
I wasn’t ready to be a mom. I wasn’t looking to be anything to you, other than a friend who’d be helping you learn how to parent. And I’m sorry for the sex stuff. That was unprofessional of me and stupid, I can see now.
But I wouldn’t change it for the world. You’re fantastic!
I’m writing this letter to let you know that I am your friend more than I’m anything else to you. I care about you nearly as much as I care about Harold. And I can understand how you must feel.
I judged you. I expected a lot out of you. And I was wrong to do that. I’m sorry, and I’ll accept whatever it is you have to do for yourself. Not all of us are cut out to be parents, after all.
I didn’t know I was. But that kid just got under my skin, little by little.
So all I’m going to ask of you is one more week. If the results come back and you are Harold’s father, please give it another week. Things will be different from hanging out in this hotel. We’ll be going home. You may see things differently there.
No matter what, Damon, I will not judge you. And I will always be here for you.
Yours in love,
Liv
Folding the letter, I place it in my bag. I think I’ll keep it. I can’t recall a time anyone was so honest with me and saw things from a side that wasn’t their own.
Liv’s a different kind of woman. A woman who deserves more. And so does Harry. But for now, I’m all they’ve got. I’ll do what she’s asked me to. If I am the father, that is.
A knock has me looking at the door. “Yes?”
“The results have arrived, Damon,” Liv’s sweet voice tells me.
“I’ll be right out. Is Harry awake yet?”
“No.”
“That’s for the best.” I pad over to the door and open it.
Liv’s standing there in shorts and a shirt with the envelope in her hand. She places it in mine and I gesture for her to come in. “You sure?” she asks me. “You wouldn’t rather get this news on your own?”
Taking her hand, I lead her to sit with me on the bed. “Nah, I want your support. I’ll need it either way.”
My hand is shaking as I open the cream-colored envelope. The paper is cream-colored too and I handle it delicately. If he’s mine, then I’ll be saving this forever.
Opening the letter slowly, I find my eyes closing. “Oh,” Liv says. “Open them up. Read it, Damon.”
“I’m his dad.”
“You’re his father, Damon!”
Looking at Liv, I’m struck dumb. I don’t know what to say. I feel numb. It all feels unreal to me. “I’m a dad, Liv.”
“You are,” she says with a bright smile. “Harold is going to be over the moon!”
Shaking my head, I just can’t believe it. “Liv, I am that little boy’s father. I am the father of a son.” My entire body begins to shake and I’ve never been more afraid in my whole life.
I’ve run through crossfire. I’ve jumped into freezing water and swam a mile to get to a dark beach where I got out, killed bad people, then swam back through shark infested waters to my boat. I’ve been held prisoner for fourteen hours and threatened with physical harm, yet I’m more afraid now than any of those times.
Her arms go around me, holding me in a loose hug. “It’s okay, baby. It is. You’ve just been given a tremendous amount of responsibility. In a matter of five days, you went from what some might consider an expectant father to a real dad. Most guys have months to get used to the idea. You’re doing great.
“Am I?” I ask, finding my voice shaky.
She laughs and looks at me with sparkling green eyes. “You are.”
Suddenly there’s a little blonde-haired boy rubbing his sleep-filled eyes at the door. “I’m up.”
Liv gives me a nod and says, “Come sit with us, Harold.”
Wearing a set of pound puppy PJ’s, he walks over to us, and I pick him up, placing him on my lap. Holding the paper out, I ask him, “Harry, would you like it if I was your real father?”
He looks at the paper, then up at me. His smile tells me what he’s going to say. “Yes.”
Liv runs her hand through his unruly curls. “Of course you would.” She looks at me. “Go on, Damon.”
“Harry, this paper says that I am, in fact, your real father.” I realize just how badly my voice is shaking and clear my throat to stop that. I don’t want him to think I don’t want him. “Would you like to call me Daddy?”
He claps just once as he grins. “Very much!”
“Then go right ahead, because you have a dad now and I have a son.” I pull him in for a big hug and look at Liv over his little shoulder. “You will help me, won’t you?”
“You two are mine to watch over. I’ll always be here for you both.” She leans in and joins our hug.
I feel like a happy little family. But I don’t know how well either of them will take it when I have to go to work. Liv thinks it’s just that easy to get out of the service, but she’s dead wrong about that.
And I don’t want to quit it, either!