Soraya

 

I pounced on Dez the moment he came back into the office. “What did he want?”

“Believe it or not, restaurant recommendations. I think he’s meeting a contact or something there.” Dez’s cheeks were flushed from the wind outside and he seemed a little out of it as he shrugged off his jacket. “Is he really a spy?”

“Oh, of course, he bragged about that,” I muttered.

“And you two are rivals?” Dez teased, smiling now.

“Please!” I bit out. “No, unfortunately, because we both worked under Mirois and I’m a field agent who travels, I’ve worked with him one too many times.”

He grinned over at me. “He was only messing with you, Soraya.”

“Ugh. He grates on me,” I muttered.

“He also sent his condolences about Faye,” Dez said gently and I stopped walking over to my desk. “Said he’s glad to see you beginning to recover.”

“Damn that man,” I muttered, all but running over to my desk and picking up my to-do list. “He didn’t even know her. What a jackass.”

“That’s what Kesari called Roy the first time they ever met,” Dez said with a reminiscent grin. “He looked like someone hit him across the head with a frying pan.”

My lips twitched into a smile. “Zimas are universally a pain in the ass.”

“Are they all like that?” Dez asked. “So… closed off?”

I raised an eyebrow. “Don’t go feeling bad for Andrei Zima, he’s not like Roy at all. Roy cares about people and tries to do right by them. Always has. Works too hard. And don’t tell Roy this, but I think Andrei should have done a lot more for Roy. Watched out for him more. Instead, I had to sneak around and watch out for him. Or get poor Faye to do it.”

“So, that’s where the resentment was coming from,” Dez teased, as he turned on the Keurig and pulled out a coffee pod. “Talking about Roy makes me think of Kes and that makes me crave coffee.”

“The resentment is not unwarranted,” I said and my lip curled. “He's way too self-important. Roy is the exact opposite, but he tried to pretend he wasn’t.”

“I still think Andrei got under your skin because you’re protective of your cubs,” Dez said.

“You better not let Roy hearing you call him one of my cubs,” I said with a laugh. “For the longest time, I had to keep it very much on the down-low since he never got along with Piper or Kai. So, when Roy was a rookie, I convinced Faye to mentor him and it worked out well.”

“Does Roy know that? Or Piper?” Dez queried.

“Balt knew and I think he told Piper, which I think made her feel guilty – but I have no idea when he told her,” I said, thinking hard. “I was super happy to hear that he agreed to work for her team last winter. It was about time, that boy was wasting away as a Runner.

“Actually, before he went to Greece, my boss and I, Mirois, you know – we were talking about it and I was like, listen, send him to Greece. She almost didn’t agree, but I convinced her to.”

“Good thing you did,” Dez commented, knowing how Roy’s intervention had managed to save Piper and Balt from possibly getting banished from the Order because of a pissed off Director Herrod. “I don’t think I’ll ever forget when Piper slugged Director Herrod.”

“Ah,” I squealed, getting up and walking over to him. “That’s right, you were there.”

Dez recounted the story and I all but fell down laughing. “Oh my God, told from your perspective makes it so much funnier for some reason,” I said, gasping for air.

“You have a great laugh,” Dez said, grinning at me.

My heart missed a few beats before I managed to get out a small, “Thank you.”

Scurrying back to my desk, I tried to get work done, but Dez and I kept lapsing into stories and he kept making me laugh. He told me about the time he’d spent with Enele transporting the precious heirloom of the Kazan family, Capitis Leonis, to Berlin and Kesari. My brother had been so intent on flirting his way through Europe that poor Dez had felt like a third wheel.

Before I knew it, I glanced over at the clock and it was seven, an hour later than I was supposed to be here and I got to my feet. “Oh my God, Dez, I’m so sorry, I’ve talked your ear off.”

“I enjoyed it,” Dez said with a chuckle. “And I did my fair share, too.”

“Hey,” I said impulsively. “Do you want to go get dinner? I’m starving and there’s nothing at all in my apartment.”

Hesitating barely a second, Dez nodded and said, “I know a place.”

“Hopefully not one of the ones you recommended to Andrei,” I said with a roll of my eyes.

“You know, he teases you like that because he knows he’ll get a rise out of you, Soraya,” Dez said gently. “I could see it on his face that he didn’t mean a word of it.”

I blew out my cheek. “Yeah, tell me something I don’t know. He still gets under my skin, though. And it goes both ways – I’ve made a joke about him and he bit my head off.”

“No hope for a reconciliation, then?” Dez asked with a laugh.

“Ugh, you’re like Balt, wanting to be his pal,” I said, shaking my head. “And I know I shouldn’t react, but he’s just so irritating. So smug. Not like you at all, which is great. When you make jokes, they’re actually funny for one thing. And charming. Andrei thinks he’s charming, but he’s obnoxious. You’re the real gentleman, the real charmer because you’re genuine.”

Dez let out a startled noise. “Wow, you’re killing me with all these compliments.”

I watched as Dez locked the door and smiled at him when he glanced at me. “Are they compliments or are they the God honest truth?”

“You’re going to make me as arrogant as Andrei,” Dez said and I laughed.

Grabbing his arm, I let him lead me downstairs and outside. On the steps, which had iced over thanks to a late-afternoon shower and rapidly dropping temperatures, his arm went around my waist as he carefully helped me down the steps. He was more worried about me falling and towards the bottom, I had to grab his lapels to keep him from slipping.

We were still laughing by the time we got to the restaurant. The afternoon had slipped into an unbearably beautiful evening, giving everything a winter fairy-tale glow outside. Seated at a table by the window, I could glance out and see the rosy hues distilled over everything. Even the parked cars and street meters had a softness to them that didn’t take away from the scene.

“I never knew winter could be so gorgeous,” I commented, looking over at Dez.

He had his chin on his hand and the light reflected off his glasses as he nodded. “I might be prejudiced, but I’ve always thought Boston was one of the loveliest cities in the world.”

There was a cadence to Dez’s words that seemed to wrap around me and I almost sighed in content. In spite of the cold temperatures and steely skies, I’d been noticing a steady warmth in my chest the last few weeks. One that always burned a little brighter in his peaceful presence.

Dez, this city, and this work had turned out to be the friend I needed during this time and I suddenly found myself incredibly grateful I'd been reassigned. Each day, I was feeling more like my old self. And soon, I hoped, King and I would figure out a way to stop the cash flow to the TLO. Then I’d return back to the frontlines with the comforting knowledge of knowing the TLO was crippled.

“This is going to sound like an odd question, maybe one you can’t answer,” Dez said, interrupting my thoughts after the appetizers had come. “But, do you know how much longer you’ll be here?”

“Maybe a month or so more,” I said. “Hopefully not too much longer.” Dez chuckled and I flushed. “I didn’t mean it like that – it’s just there’s so much going on back home and elsewhere…”

“How are Piper and Balt?” Dez asked casually. “The twins?”

“I think they’re good,” I said, smiling softly. “Have you seen any recent pictures of them? They’re getting so big!” When Dez shook his head, I pulled out my phone. “See?”

“You think Leo will be as big as Balt?” Dez asked with a laugh.

“I’m sure they’ll both be too tall for their own good,” I said with a shake of my head.

“I hope I get to meet them soon,” Dez said, handing me back my phone.

“Why wouldn’t you?” I asked and he shrugged.

“Work, this and that. I’ve always been one to bounce from university to university teaching, and I’m not sure where I’ll go next,” Dez said.

This disquieted me and I pursed my lips. “You should come to San Francisco at the end of the semester. Spend the summer there – teach there, even,” I suggested, although it came out like a demand. “You don’t have to work for the Order, but it would be nice to have you around.”

Dez smiled in that slow, charming way of his that made me wish I was a mind-reader. But all he said was a casual, “Maybe. I’ll have to see.”

“I’ve heard people say San Fran is the Boston of the west coast,” I inveigled. “Tons of museums, the best restaurants, too. I can think of like twenty places off the top of my head I should take you, too. Plus, Piper, Balt, Kesari, and Roy all live there now. And Isla and Kai might be there.”

“What about you?” Dez asked. “Are you living in San Francisco?”

“Oh,” I said, trying to think about the last time I’d been to my apartment in LA, which was really becoming an overpriced storage unit for extraneous shoes. “Not really, but I’m like you – I’m a nomad. I guess LA is home base, but I do like San Francisco.”

“If you could live anywhere, where would you live?” Dez asked.

“One place?” I asked and he nodded. “Wow, that’s hard.”

“Why, where have you been?” he asked.

This launched me into a litany of cities and countries I’d visited. To my surprise, Dez had lived in several as well – teaching and studying. While it wasn’t rare to meet people who considered travel the manna of life, it was rare to meet someone who bounced around the globe as much as I did. And we were both alike in that we’d done the vast majority of it alone.

“I thought field agents worked in teams, though,” Dez said with a frown.

“You do have your squads, but you also spend time alone. We have to – there’s not enough of us to go around. Of course, for any kind of work, we usually are with a team. It’s safer that way. My being here alone is a bit of anomaly. I should have at least three other people.”

“What about what Roy did? A Runner?” Dez asked.

“Oof, that job. That's a lot of ‘running' around for the Heads and other agents of Anubis. You can think of him as part-agent, part-spy, and part-courier pigeon." Dez laughed and I did too. “Don’t tell Roy I said that. “Being a Runner is a good way to see the whole of the Order and figure out what you want to do in the order. I was one for a year and it sucked.”

“And what about Andrei?” Dez asked.

“I honestly don’t know. That’s all very covert. I do know he infiltrates places and does most of it alone. It’s dangerous work – of all the jobs in Anubis that could cost your life, his is at the top.”

“It’s more bureaucratic than I thought,” Dez commented. “When you say the Order, it sounds so mysterious and old-school, but it’s not that dissimilar to any big organization.”

I nodded. “With each year I feel like there’s more red tape.”

“Maybe that’s how they’re doing it,” Dez suggested and I raised my eyebrows. “The traitors – they’re hiding in plain sight, right? Take it from someone who works in one of the biggest and unwieldiest bureaucracies outside of government. Academia.”

I sat back, intrigued. “What do you mean?”

“Well, there are shifter classes and schools of learning across the globe, right? One of the ways this is possible is because of the layers and layers of regulations, rules and so forth. Instead of working against the system, shifter academics found a way to work within it.” He pushed his glasses up his nose. “Actually, if you think about it, it’s kind of the way shifters have always survived.”

Something about that lit a fire in my brain and an idea began to piece itself together. I wasn’t quite sure what I was onto, but something about Dez’s statement hit home.

“You’re brilliant, you know that?” I asked him and he hunched his shoulders, smiling at me. “For some reason, something about that…” I made a frustrated noise. “I can’t quite put my finger on it.”

Dez tilted his head. “Sounds like you need to sleep on it. Or take a shower.”

That made me laugh. “Sure,” I said.

At that moment, the waiter appeared with our bill and I covertly glanced at my watch. It was almost nine-thirty. Where had the last two and half hours gone?

After we’d signed our names and left a generous tip, Dez helped me into my coat. I took a bit of pleasure in that, allowing myself to lean against him for a moment and he squeezed my shoulders. Outside, we lingered for a few minutes, still talking, until Dez took a step back.

“I really have to go,” he said reluctantly. “I’ll see you Wednesday.”

“See you,” I said, watching him walk away.

Pulling out my phone, I went to call Faye to ask her what she thought about it when I violently started and squeezed it in my hand.

Oh my God, what is wrong with me?

Head down, I began to walk, berating myself when another voice woke up in the back of my head. It sounded like Faye and she was chastising me.

What good is it to brood and blame yourself? I’d be the first person to tell you to make the most of every day! Miss me, sister, but don’t miss out on life because of me.

Biting my lip, a smile spread across my face and I dabbed at my eyes.

If I knew one thing, it was that Faye would never forgive me if I didn’t live life to the absolute fullest. Chasing happiness and hope.