Balt

 

I’d woken up almost an hour before, but was lying in bed as guilt and remorse churned my stomach. What kind of an asshole had I been to Piper last night? A woman I owed so much to?

That wasn’t the kind of man I was.

Sitting up, I pressed my fingers into the pads of muscle at the base of the back of my neck and tried to massage out the tension. Everything was tense and tight.

I couldn’t take much more of this.

“Good morning, Balt,” Piper said, breezing in and yanking open the curtains. “Ordered us breakfast, should be here soon.”

“Piper, I’m sorry about–” I started to say, wishing this wasn’t my new routine.

“Don’t worry about it,” she interrupted. “It was yesterday. Ancient history. Oh, but thanks for taking care of my foot, by the way. It’s all healed up. Oh, and Soraya had to go – probably flying to South Africa as we speak.”

I nodded, a little dazed as I looked at her. Piper wasn’t mad.

Maybe it wasn’t as bad as I thought it’d been. Then I thought about it and cringed.

No, it had been ten times worse. Piper was just trying to handle it like a mature adult, while I was regressing into a teenage male, hormones and mood swings to match.

At that moment I realized she was wearing jean shorts and a black tank top, both of which flattered her long legs and torso. I still wasn’t used to Piper in these kinds of clothes and it took me a minute to force myself to look away.

She’d been looking at her phone and now I sensed her gaze on me. “I’m getting up,” I said and yawned, moving slowly. Damn this jet lag.

“Still not used to London time?” she said in a mock British accent.

“Nah, probably won’t be until next week,” I said, swinging my legs off the bed and stretching. Looking over at her I smiled. “Thanks for waking me up.”

Piper seemed to be distracted and her gaze fluttered restlessly over me. “Oh,” she said after a minute. “Of course. Anytime.” Then she turned, hiding her face behind her hair as she looked at her phone again. “You might want to hurry though.”

A strange thought hit me out of nowhere and a smirk formed on my face before I could help it.

Was Piper checking me out?

“Oh, hey, in all the good times we were having last night, I didn't ask you how dinner was," I said nonchalantly, both wanting and not wanting her eyes back on me. The urge to know, to have that happen again was undeniable and I egged her on in my head. I could almost feel the storm of fire in my soul licking through the last layer without restraint. "How's the weasel?"

“Balt!” Piper exclaimed with a laugh, her hair swinging over her shoulder as she turned.

“Still a weasel, eh?” I said, trying to do a British accent and failing.

She laughed again and her smile became a cross between amused and guilty, her eyebrows high on her face. “Um, yes. Definitely. But we won’t be seeing him anytime soon.”

“Good,” I said with vehemence. Jamison was one of those rare people who made me hate them on sight alone and whose name caused me to want to punch something. I’d tried to be nice to him through the years, but it was impossible. Like breathing underwater impossible. Standing up, I walked over to Piper and asked, “Did you get anything out of him?”

“Huh?” Piper was tucking her hair behind her ears and looking away. She seemed flustered and my chest suddenly twisted with ugly jealousy. Was she acting like this because of Jamison? Had he asked her out again and she’d said yes? “Oh, no not really.” She made a face.

“How come you’re not telling me what happened?”

Piper put a hand on her hip and gave me a look. “Funny, I could say the same thing to you.” Then her eyes went wide and she bit her lip. “Sorry, I didn’t mean that. It’s honestly because nothing of consequence happened or was said. It would be a waste to relive the minutiae.”

“Regale me,” I said, folding my arms.

“Go take a shower Balt,” Piper said in a tired voice, pushing around me.

“He didn’t ask you out, did he?” I asked before I could help it.

Piper threw back her head and laughed. “Oh, Balt. No. A million times no.”

That convinced me and I nodded, moving towards the shower. “Gotta make sure you’re not dating any weasels, part of my job description.”

“And what job is that?” Piper asked, sounding amused.

“Best friend stuff, you know,” I said, glancing back at her.

She looked faintly put out, her eyes distant and she nodded. “Sure. I know.”

 

Later that day we were walking along the Serpentine, the long winding lake in the middle of Hyde Park and enjoying the light crowds. Clouds had rolled in, threatening rain and most of the visitors had wisely taken shelter.

“Another dead-end lead,” Piper said out loud with a sigh.

“We’ll get ‘em eventually,” I said in a reassuring tone.

For right now, I wanted to enjoy this moment with every fiber of my being. Me and Piper, walking along in a beautiful park in the middle of summer and the taste of rain on my tongue. Her simple outfit that had me desperately trying not to notice how well her shorts hugged her ass.

And her smile almost arrested me mid-step.

Piper’s determination to let bygones be bygones and move forward was having a soothing effect on me. I was holding my temper in check and avoiding falling into brooding. Her single-minded focus was familiar and bracing, lulling me into forgetting about the future.

“I’m starting to think this is longer than a few months of a job, Balt,” Piper said. “There are so many loose ends to track down and the Kazans don’t take kindly to anyone in their business. Never mind if the TLO is involved.”

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get there,” I said.

“I still wonder if that little speech about having a buyer for Isla was a red herring,” Piper said slowly. “Why tell us so much? And before the Parasite always avoided us – why confront us?”

I mulled it over, thinking back to that night in the desert and the moment when my cousin had let out a soft cry of pain. Piper and I had sprung apart, our embrace interrupted and watched as he’d held a defiant, white-cheeked Isla to his side and pressed a gun to her head.

“So many puzzle pieces and the puzzle keeps getting bigger,” Piper murmured. At that moment raindrops splattered on us and we both glanced up. “Oh no.”

“Come on, run,” I urged, heading towards a small, circular stone-roofed shelter in the distance. But we weren’t fast enough, even for two shifters, as the skies opened and soaked us.

“Dammit,” Piper said, shaking her hands as we ducked underneath. Her hair was full of water and she wrung it out. “We should’ve known better and grabbed an umbrella.”

“Yeah,” I said, squeezing the water out of my shirt and watching her out of the corner of my eye. “Should of.”

In an alternate universe, this would be a place where Piper and I would be glad to find ourselves alone for an hour. Or a few.

Abruptly I turned and went to go lean on one of the stone pillars, watching the rain. All around us the greens became more vivid and the shadows darker.

“Move over,” Piper said, elbowing me as she came to stand next to me.

I stood up straighter and flattened myself against the pillar and gave her a shrug. “No room.”

She rolled her eyes, then turned and settled herself into my side. “Hm, look at that.”

Bad idea.

I could almost hear my self-control melting away as my left arm settled around her shoulders and my right clenched at my side. Don’t do this to yourself.

But it was too late, I could smell her perfume and was intoxicated.

Piper’s cheek was pressing into my shoulder and I felt a surge of helpless rage at the universe as I looked at the top her dark head.

Why couldn't I have the one thing I wanted? Or at least be honest about my feelings? Try to win her heart?

Craning my head forward, I saw her eyes were closed and my arm slipped a little lower, my hand cupping her elbow. At least I had this, I thought with a fervent gratefulness.

This small, insane taste of what could never be. Piper’s warm body against mine, our wet clothes melding together and her hair tickling and dripping onto my arm.

“Tired?” I asked in a teasing voice, as I gently pulled her even closer.

I am a masochist.

Piper nodded and I watched her face relax even more. With her eyes closed and her lips curving up at the corner, she looked young. I could almost pretend we were teenagers again and I was ignorant of the chains around my soul that would one day tear me away from her.

Today would be another clumsy attempt to try to see how she’d respond to my feelings – not one day closer to when I’d have to leave.

I lifted my head, watching as the rain continued to fall and my own eyes closed. Suddenly Piper shifted and my heart plummeted as I thought she was about to pull away.

Instead, she turned so her head was on my chest and wrapped her arms around my torso with an out-of-character possessiveness. Now my heart seemed to shake as I held onto her tighter and my other arm wrapped around her as well.

It was then it came to me.

Some deeper instinct of Piper’s was recognizing the distance and she was starting to dig her claws in. But I also knew she would never acknowledge it fully, either.

No, she had absolute faith in our friendship and in me.

Piper would never think I’d betray her.

In that moment, as my eyes opened and I looked down at her, the tension in her body and the musicality of the rain, I knew I had to. But I honestly wondered how I’d do it.

Haven’t I lost enough? The question was filled with an unusual bitterness. Usually, I could always be satisfied with whatever was in my glass – half-full or with only a few drops. 

First my father and my home in Greece, then my aunt and uncle, along with my cousin and my second home. Then Kai and Piper’s mother, Palila, who’d been like an aunt to me, only a year and a half after that. Followed by dark days where Piper and I would look at each other nervously when Elias didn't come out of his room all day while trying to distract Kai from self-destructing.

Then, Kai, practically my own little brother, the wise, energetic, and loveable, had vanished on us in his early twenties. I’d thought the Weslarks would break then and me along with them.

The bittersweet days after rescuing him – learning about the TLO and what they did to him. Having to send him away for his own safety, even though it was the last thing any of us wanted.

I still remembered when Piper had told me her plan and I’d snapped. We’d gotten into the ugliest fight we’d ever had until I had to walk away. Later, she’d found me way down along the beach at three in the morning, on a lonely stretch between where they lived in Malibu and further north, near Point Dume. And she’d broken down for the first time since her mother died.

I don’t know what else to do, Balt.

She’d sobbed for hours. After all the stress and horror of trying to find Kai, then the moment where we realized TLO had given him shifting abilities, and now having to make him leave.

Followed by our fight.

Knowing I’d been the factor that tipped those scales had devastated me and I’d held her while she cried into my shirt. I’d never felt more protective of her than I had that night. I could have murdered someone with my bare hands if they’d tried to hurt her.

Piper always made it seem like she didn’t need anything. She was unstoppable.

If and when she tripped up, which was rare, I was always there to break the fall.

Except for four weeks ago when the TLO had decided to repeat history, only with Piper.

The first time, with Kai, Piper had somehow helped me keep myself in check. Without her, I spiraled. The darkness of those days still refused to leave me and I sometimes woke up in a cold sweat and caught in nightmares, stumbling to her room to make sure she was there. Or feeling a cold panic when she vanished from my sight. Reaching out when she was next to me to touch her.

And I was supposed to leave her? The woman who I–

“Rain stopped,” Piper said with a yawn, lifting her head and pulling away.

I let her go and shook my head, feeling as though I was breaking out of a dark void into the light. I’d just spun myself down one hell of a rabbit hole.

“Yeah, we should get going,” I said automatically, wincing at how my clothes were chafing.

“Mm, thanks for the nap,” Piper stretched and I averted my eyes. “You know, you’re pretty comfortable for being a wall of muscle.” A finger poked my stomach and I grinned down at her.

“You can also sleep anywhere,” I pointed out as we began to walk, edging around the puddles and heading through the copse of trees that led back to the path. “Office chair. Office floor.”

“I have never slept on a floor,” Piper protested.

“I’ve found you curled up under your desk, Piper Weslark, do not pretend otherwise,” I snorted. “And asleep on said desk. I put a couch in your office, but do you utilize it? No.”

“Couch is for storage,” Piper said and then she stopped. “Huh. I wonder…”

“What?” I asked, stopping and studying her.

She made a face. “Probably not my office anymore.”

“I’m sure it is, Piper. That place is huge,” I said reassuringly. “And if they’d have someone clean it out, it would be Talori or your father. Don’t worry about it.”

“I won’t.” She gave me a blinding smile and the sun broke through the clouds, lighting across her shoulders and weaving gold into her dark hair, while her blue eyes danced. My breath caught. This was Piper – a daughter of sunshine and flame. “I’m with you.”

Her words caught me off guard and a hot pulse started at my throat, before creeping down into my veins. “Uh-ha, excuse me?” I asked, my hand lifting before I could stop it.

She caught it and weaved her fingers through it, then began to pull me along. We were walking and holding hands. But we never walked and held hands. I blinked down stupidly.

This was happening. We were holding hands.

“Uh, Piper…?” I asked in a rough voice.

“I thought my punishment was going to be either far worse or far lighter. But I didn’t think they’d take away the directorship. That sucked.” Piper paused and looked down. “It felt like the end of everything, but it wasn’t. Not even close. Who cares, honestly?”

At that, I stopped dead and she swung around. "Are you feeling okay?" I asked.

“Yes.” She had a thoughtful smile on her face. “Balt, I thought we’d be separated. And I was pretending to be okay with it when really I was so frustrated about it I could scream. That’s why I picked that fight with you in the hallway, I think.” She paused while my mouth opened and closed. “I thought I’d have a whole new team or something, I don’t know.

“However, I realize now, while field work isn’t glamorous or quite as reputable as what we were doing in LA, I don’t care.” My eyebrows were lifting into the sky and she gave me a sassy look. “I don’t. SoA thinks they’re putting me in my place and maybe they are, but I dodged the real bullet.”

“Which is?” I asked, trying to catch up to Piper’s quicksilver mental gymnastics.

“Losing you as a partner, Balt. They could have reassigned both of us. I don’t know why I thought I would be okay with that.” She shook her head in disbelief. “I’m such an idiot.”

A smile was spreading across my face and I laughed at the look on her face. “Oh, so I’m not so bad to have around?” I asked lightly, even as pure happiness spread through me.

She glared at me. “Of course not. I would have sent you packing long ago.”

“Come here, Pipla,” I said and before she could stop me, I’d pulled her in for a hug. “You’re not an idiot.”

She sighed. “No, I am. I’d rather be in the trenches with you then alone at the top. But I am starting to worry that this assignment is a test of our partnership.”

I went to disagree, then I stopped. Piper had a point. It was unusual for a two-man team to share a probation period. Further, the SoA didn’t have too many dedicated ones, preferring squads or individuals. It could very well be a test.

The only reason they’d put us on a two-man team was because of that training. We’d been assigned to groups, but had always done better on our own and so were placed together.

And it had been that way ever since. However, after Kai’s kidnapping and subsequent return, then abrupt reassignment to traveling field agent by Piper, I’d known we were under more scrutiny. Perhaps the Heads weren’t so out of touch as we agents liked to assume they were.

Shifters of Anubis without Piper? Piper reassigned?

“They wouldn’t dare,” I growled, even as I laughed at the idea of them trying to separate me from Piper. “In fact, I’d like to see them try.”

“Okay, big guy, don’t tempt fate,” Piper said, pulling away and punching my shoulder.

“It’s not gonna happen,” I said, with far more savagery than I meant. Nudging her, we began to walk again and I wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “No way in hell.”

“Alright, then, Baltsaros Kazan has spoken,” Piper said, sounding amused.

Kazan.

Cursed. Whispered a voice. Oh, you’ll be separated by fate soon enough.

No. I thought with a burning intensity. There has to be a cure. There has to be a way.

I looked down at Piper, smiling as the sun dusted away the last of the clouds and fog, and my heart seemed to shiver into shards of glass and shred my soul.

I can’t lose her. It will destroy me.

I have to break this curse.