Today seems to be going by quickly, and I don’t have enough time to accomplish everything on my list. Rich finished work ten minutes ago and should be home soon from his twenty-minute run, only to leave for a thirty-minute run later. He only worked until lunch time, so I thought it would be nice if we could just relax and have fun like we used to do.

“Jennifer?” Rich yells as he comes through the door, slamming it behind him.

“Yes, I’m in the front room,” I reply. Rich never uses my full name. He hates it and feels that it is old-fashioned.  He has never used it during the entire time we have been together.

“What are you doing?” He asks.

“Name place cards, seating plan and other stuff,” I state, turning to face him.

“More fucking wedding stuff?” He storms out of the room. Something must be wrong. I have never seen his eyes so cold before.

I get up from the floor and follow him up the stairs. I walk into our bedroom to find Rich sitting on his side of our bed. The window is wide open and his mobile and keys lay to the side of him on the bed. His head is tilted towards the floor.

“What’s wrong?” I enquire as I walk towards the bed.

“Go away,” he says in a calm manner with his head still pointing down.

“No, what’s wrong?” I climb onto the bed behind him and crawl to him.

“Nothing,” he says in a sharp tone.

“Yes, there is,” I state, remaining calm.

“Everything,” he replies, lifting his head up and staring out of the window.

“Talk to me,” I demand.

“The wedding, work, Chad, Luke, everything!” He is shouting now.

I take a deep breath. Why did he have to say his name? “Let’s start at the top. The wedding.”

“It’s taking over our lives.” He turns on the bed to face me.

“I know, but it will be worth it. It will be over soon,” I state.

Rich sighs.

“Do you still want to get married, Rich?” I feel the stinging in my eyes.

“Yes. Well, I think I do,” he states.

“You need to know for sure, Rich.” I look down at my legs. I definitely don’t want this to be happening right now.

“I love you.” He adds, placing his hand on my back.

“Are you sure? Or do you want Chad?”  I ask, moving slightly away from him.

“No, I want you!” He yells.

“Okay, what’s wrong with work?” I quickly change the subject to the second item at hand.

“Just a bad day,” he states with anger in his voice.

“Okay, Luke?” I question. Luke is another one of Rich’s friends. He is such a sweet man.  I have never connected with someone as easily as I did with him.  I met him a month after Rich and I got together when he was just himself, not the big actor he is today.  To me, he is still the same sweet man. He is always there if Rich and I ever need him.  I know he loves to act.  I just hope he can find his personal happily ever after like the characters he plays in his films.

“He wants me to go away with him for a few days. To get away from the wedding stress,” he replies, smiling.

It is nice to see him smiling for a change. “Then go,” I state. Maybe the time away will help him.

Rich turns and faces me, “Are you sure?”

“Yes, where are you going?” I ask.

“Vegas, for three days,” he says with excitement in his voice.

“Have fun.” I give Rich a kiss on the cheek.

He jumps up from the bed and rushes to his wardrobe. Very quickly, he pulls out his suitcase and begins to pack his things. I decide not to ask if he wants any help. I will have to repack the suitcase anyway so it is neat and everything fits properly. I lie back on the pillows and watch him pull out things from drawers and throw them into the suitcase. He’s taking all his favourite clothes. I let my mind race as I sit there observing his strange behaviour. Everything is off with us. When we have sex, he just rushes it as quickly as he can. Rich does not cuddle up with me or anything. He will not allow me to touch him, scrape my fingernails down his back, play with his hair, or suck him. None of the things he has loved before now. He will not even let me go on top. It’s all the normal way, me on my back with him over me. He will not even let me wrap my legs around him. I think he needs time away. Maybe that will fix our sex life as well as everything else. I want him here with me. I grab my mobile.

Megan, can I come stay at yours tonight? Rich is going away. Xx

Of course you can, Jen. Xx

I’m feeling all low and sad, and I really don’t want to be alone tonight. I just want to cry. I need to come clean, so I plan to tell Megan everything tonight. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I have to work tomorrow, so I will have something to keep my mind busy. Also, it is Alison’s leaving do after work, and I need to choose something to take with me.

It only takes Rich fifteen minutes to get ready.

“That’s me off,” he states as he fastens his case.

“Okay. Have fun,” I say, smiling at him.

“Bye,” he says, walking out the door. No kiss or anything.

I quickly grab my clothes and fold everything neatly into my purple overnight bag to prevent creases. I’m ready to head over to Megan’s.