Chapter Two
I grab lunch and head back to my apartment. I’m just about caught up on Grey’s Anatomy when Liv walks in. She’s a teacher, and she has great hours.
“How’d it go?” she asks, flopping onto the couch next to me.
“I think it went well. The creative director seemed to take a liking to me.” Liv raises her eyebrows. “Liv, he’s gay.”
“Oh, too bad.”
Liv is on a mission to find me a man to help take my mind off Ben. I keep telling her I’m not ready to date anyone. “Lexi,” she always says in exasperation, “I’m not saying you have to marry the guy—just go on one date. You need to find your rebound.” As much as I protest, she keeps trying to fix me up, but I always turn her down. “What else?” she asks. “How did it compare to the other places where you’ve interviewed?”
“I really liked it. I think it’s my top choice. The head of new business said it’s a good time to join the company because they’re winning a lot of accounts.”
“Of course he’d say that. He obviously wants you to work there.”
“Well, they have been getting a lot of good press. And I don’t think he’d lie about it. His uncle is one of the founders, so he has the family name to uphold. He also happened to be adorable.”
Liv perks up at this revelation. “Lexi, spill.”
“There isn’t much to tell. He looked to be in his late twenties, beautiful blue eyes framed by golden-brown lashes, strong jaw, good body, killer dimples, and no wedding ring.” Liv knows I’m a sucker for dimples.
“Is that all?” she teases. “What’s his name?”
“Jake Hartman.”
“Let’s go find out about Jake,” she says, leading me to her computer. “Also, does the company have a policy on inter-office dating?”
“Liv, they haven’t even given me an offer yet.”
“I’m just sayin’,” she replies.
We first look him up on Facebook, but there are many Jake Hartmans, and none look to be a match. Then she does a Google search and comes up with a number of hits. She skims a bunch of links then filters the search by image. And there he is up on the screen, looking all sexy.
“Lexi,” she exclaims, “he’s gorgeous!”
“I told you. I’m sure he has a girlfriend, or he’s a player. A guy like that doesn’t stay single for long.” I close the window and shut the laptop. I don’t want to think about Jake Hartman anymore. “What do you want to do for dinner?” I ask.
“Let’s do sushi tonight instead of Sunday because I’ll be out of town this weekend.”
Since I’ve moved back, we’ve started a tradition of Sunday-night sushi. “That’s right!” I exclaim. “The wedding is this weekend.” Liv and her boyfriend, Jason, are going to Dallas for his friend’s wedding. She and Jason have been dating for nine months now. I really like him and suspect they’ll get engaged. It’s one of the reasons I need to start looking for my own apartment. Liv always has had a boyfriend. Even back in high school, she typically was dating someone seriously. Although I didn’t have many boyfriends, I had plenty of crushes, but I was always too shy to act on them. I’m kind of old-fashioned that way. I know a lot of bold girls who give out their number to guys who haven’t even asked, or will go up to a cute guy in a bar and strike up a conversation. Not me. I think the guy should make the first move. I want to know he’s interested first.
I like to take some credit for Liv and Jason’s relationship. When they first met, she wasn’t that into him. They were fixed up by a mutual friend after she’d gone through a bad breakup. Maybe that’s why she’s so intent on setting me up. I could tell there was something different about him, and I kept insisting she give him a chance. She was so hung up on her ex, though, that she didn’t see she had a good thing right in front of her. At my urging, she agreed to go out with him again, and discovered the great qualities I recognized all along. He worships the ground she walks on, but he’s not a pushover either. He’s a defense attorney, and a good one from what I hear. He puts in a lot of long hours, so he and Liv spend only a few weeknights together. This works out for me because I get to spend more time with her, and I like having someone to do things with; it helps keep my mind off Ben.
That night I can’t fall asleep. Inevitably my thoughts drift to Ben. I keep thinking back to when we were together, looking for signs of a red flag. The only thing I can think of is that I told him I wouldn’t move to New York without a commitment. Perhaps he wasn’t ready for marriage, but we’d been together seven years. Maybe that should have been a red flag in and of itself. But we were young when we met, and then he was busy with medical school and his residency. I’m a pretty good judge of character, and I thought he was one of the good ones, although I don’t have much to compare our relationship to, given my dating track record. I went out with a few guys in high school—none seriously—and had many random hookups in college. During my sophomore year, I dated a guy for about six months, but then summer came, and we parted ways amicably. We lived far apart, and neither of us was up for a long-distance summer romance. Then Ben came along. He was the first guy who made me feel truly beautiful and loved. The memory of his romantic proposal plays over in my mind, and I wonder how things could have gone so wrong. I feel like I failed somehow, like I wasn’t enough for him. It torments me that I don’t know why he cheated, but I can’t bring myself to talk to him. I’m just not ready yet; the hurt is still too raw. Deep down I know I’ll never get back together with him, and the thought fills me with despair. But I could never be in a relationship with someone I can’t trust, and I know I’d constantly doubt him. It’s been four months since I ended things, and I really miss having him in my life. I tried to stay in New York after our breakup, but it proved to be too difficult; plus most of my friends and family are here. As the tears slide slowly down my face, I wonder whether this feeling will ever go away. I finally drift off to sleep, and Ben haunts my dreams.
I spend the next few days unpacking the last of my boxes—the ones marked “Miscellaneous” that I’d been avoiding. I put away the items I want to keep and toss the rest. Just as I sit down for a break, my phone rings. It’s Judy Schaefer from Hartman & Taylor calling to offer me the job. I’ve already received offers from the other two agencies, but I’ve been holding out until I heard from Hartman. I probably should tell her I need to think it over, but I accept on the spot. There are only so many errands and so much unpacking I can do, and I get restless sitting around all day. I’m eager to get back into a routine. I start a week from Monday.
My first instinct is to call Ben, but I don’t. Instead I call my parents to tell them the news, and then I call Liv. I catch her while she’s between classes. “Congrats, Lexi! We’ll have go out tonight to celebrate.”
We agree to grab martinis at our favorite bar, Lux. I decide to cook a nice dinner to thank Liv for all her support. I don’t know how I could have gotten through these past few weeks without her. I still feel like a ghost of myself. I peer in the mirror, and at first glance, I look the same—same long chestnut-brown hair, big almond-shaped brown eyes, olive skin, and slim build. But on closer inspection, I notice bags under my eyes even makeup can’t hide; my skin has lost its luster; and clothes that once fit perfectly now hang loosely on my frame. I didn’t have much of an appetite in the weeks after the “incident,” as I now like to call it, and I’m still not back to my ideal weight. I make a mental note to add more protein to my diet. Then I look at my left hand, now bare, which serves as a constant reminder. I sigh in frustration and close my eyes. I start to think about Ben but push the thought from my mind. Everyone keeps telling me time heals all wounds, but I’m still waiting.
The week passes quickly. I’m totally unpacked, and the apartment is clean and stocked with food. On Sunday night I choose my outfit carefully so I won’t have to waste time in the morning fretting about what to wear. I opt for a fitted, camel-colored pencil dress with exposed gold zippers in place of pockets. I accessorize with a skinny brown belt, suede Mary Jane pumps, and gold chandelier earrings. I don’t sleep well and feel exhausted when the alarm goes off at six forty-five. I take a hot shower to wake myself up then blow out my naturally wavy hair until it’s stick straight. Liv is always telling me I have such great hair because I can wear it so many different ways. It’s amazing what you can learn on YouTube.
I grab a coffee at Starbucks then head to Hartman & Taylor. Judy told me to stop by her office at eight thirty so she could give me an ID badge along with a key to my office. I arrive right on time; being late gives me anxiety. She takes my photo for the badge and gives me a temporary card until it’s ready. I head to my office and unpack the few personal items I have. My old office was filled with pictures of Ben and me. Now I have three simple framed photos: one of my family, one of my nephew Charlie, and the other of me with my friends. I stare at the picture and remember the night, one of my last in Chicago, when my friends threw me a going-away party. I hardly recognize the happy, carefree girl gazing back at me. Although it’s only been months, it seems like a lifetime ago. My friends had the photo framed as part of my going-away gift, but now it only brings back painful memories. I make a mental note to replace it. Just then I hear a knock on my door. A pretty blond girl with warm brown eyes pops her head in.
“You must be Lexi,” she says. “I’m Nicole. I sit in the office right next door.”
“Hi. It’s so nice to meet you.”
We chat for a few minutes, and she offers to show me around. She introduces me to some people on our floor and gives me the lowdown on everyone. I can tell she’s the type of person I would be friends with. Plus she seems like someone good to know because she’s up on the latest company gossip. We’re chatting outside her door when I spy Jake walking down the hall. Once again he’s wearing a crisp, light-blue button-down shirt that brings out the color in his eyes, along with sterling silver cuff links. I find myself wondering if they were a gift.
“Hi, Lexi,” he says. “I’m so glad you decided to join us. I see you’ve met Nicole.”
The three of us chat for a bit, and I notice how easily he and Nicole banter back and forth. It’s like they’re old friends—or perhaps something more. Then Jake looks at his watch and says, “I gotta go meet with legal. If I don’t settle this tagline dispute, Simon will have my head. See you, Lexi, Nicole.”
“Bye, Jake,” I tell him. “And good luck with that.”
After he walks away, Nicole says, “Gorgeous, isn’t he?”
I guess I’m not the only one who’s noticed. “Yes,” I reply with a laugh. “What’s his deal?”
“I hear he goes out with a lot of girls, but he doesn’t date anyone at the office. God knows, many have tried, but he has a strict rule about inter-office dating. It’s kind of an unspoken thing.”
“Oh,” I say, trying to hide my disappointment. “Is there a company rule against it?”
“Only that you can’t date your direct superior. Apparently there was an incident that happened a number of years ago—some girl claiming he sexually harassed her. From what I heard, she was hung up on Jake, and they had a fling. When he tried to end it, she freaked, and it was her form of revenge. Everyone around here knew it wasn’t true, but ever since then, he won’t date anybody at the office.”
I too find the claim hard to believe. Jake doesn’t seem the type; plus he probably can get any girl he wants. I plan to investigate further.
I go back to my office and check my calendar. I have a meeting with Morgan in fifteen minutes. I read through some of the materials she gave me then head to her office. She’s talking with someone but motions for me to come in. “Lexi, this is Nigel Hughes. He’s the head planner on our New Business team. Nigel, this is Lexi Winters. She just accepted the position on the Lumineux account.”
“It’s a pleasure,” he says in a British accent as he shakes my hand.
“Lexi has a lot of beauty experience,” Morgan says. “I’m sure she’d be a real asset on some of your upcoming pitches.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” Nigel looks me over, which makes me uncomfortable, but I hold his gaze. Then he turns back to Morgan and says, “I’ll send you those numbers you asked for by the end of the day.”
Once Nigel leaves, Morgan turns her attention to me. She shares her plans for the account and gives me background on all of our clients. The good news is that the company has an office in Chicago, which makes it much easier to establish and maintain a relationship with them. Plus it means less travel—not that I mind traveling, but constantly being on the road can be tiring. Morgan has made arrangements for the two of us to go to Lumineux’s offices tomorrow so she can introduce me. She also arranged a lunch with my new team for this afternoon so I can get to know everyone.
The rest of the morning passes quickly, and my team and I head out to Riva’s, a seafood restaurant at Navy Pier that overlooks Lake Michigan. Michelle is the only person there I’ve met. Morgan introduces me to Barb, our planner; Matt, creative director; Erica, art director; and finally Megan, our copywriter. It’s a fun group, and everyone is very friendly. We spend a large part of the meal talking about our personal lives, and then Morgan gets down to business. We have our first briefing on Thursday, so she wants us to spend the next two days doing research to prepare. When I return to the office, I decide to set up meetings with each team member individually so I can learn more about their styles and experience.
The next day, Tuesday, Morgan brings me to meet our key clients: Paul, the marketing director, and Natalia, the brand manager. Paul recently came to Lumineux from Lancôme and is very seasoned. Natalia was based with Lumineux in France and recently moved to the States to help with the US launch. She has a beautiful European accent and is very polished. I can now see what Simon meant about wanting someone who looked the part. We talk about their challenges, goals, and vision for the business. I ask a lot of questions and take copious notes. Then I give an overview about my background and share some initial thoughts I have for the launch. Natalia latches onto one of my ideas but says we’ll first need to engage the other agencies that will be helping with the launch. I suggest we arrange an introductory meeting and Paul asks for my help in setting it up. Overall it’s a productive meeting, and I’m looking forward to working with them.
That night when I get home, I do another Google search on Jake. I’m curious about the sexual harassment claim and don’t remember seeing anything about it when Liv and I did our initial search. I type in “Jake Hartman” and “sexual harassment.” A number of links come up but none related to that topic. I scroll down and finally find a hit on page three. Clearly he had a good team in place to optimize the search results so the more favorable stories come up first. But that’s the thing with the Internet—you entirely can’t erase your past. I click on the link and scan the article. It doesn’t give much information other than Hartman & Taylor planned to vigorously defend itself against a lawsuit brought by a former employee, Jessica Adams. The suit alleged that she received unwanted sexual advances from Jake Hartman, which resulted in a hostile work environment. I continue to scroll and find another hit. The story doesn’t say much either, aside from the fact that the judge dismissed the case because the claims were unsubstantiated. I now understand why Jake won’t date anyone at work. I can only imagine the embarrassment the case caused him and the company. I go back and read some of the other articles about him. Most of them discuss his success at Hartman & Taylor and the fact that since he took over the New Business team, the agency has more than doubled its client base. None of those articles mention the lawsuit. I bet he’s had to work extra hard to make that stain go away. Before I go to sleep, I find myself thinking of Jake. It’s too bad he’s off limits. He definitely could be a nice distraction.