LESS THAN an hour after fleeing Elyse’s office, I returned home from my last day of work at GKV. I was in an agitated state and planned to avoid Allison. Heide was asleep and, for once, I was thankful to come home so late.
Allison was busy in the kitchen, removing dishes from the cupboards and packing them away. I strode right by her without my usual greeting. My irritation must have been noticeable, because she stopped her work and followed me to our bedroom. She didn’t say a word or try to halt my progress as I stripped out of my work clothes. I was relieved. Truth was, I couldn’t wait to get them away from my body.
I acknowledged Allison with a glance before pulling my undershirt over my head.
“You’re home earlier than I thought you’d be.” Allison’s voice conveyed her curiosity.
“Yeah,” I mumbled, uncertain how many of the evening’s details I should share with my wife.
“Did something happen?”
“No.”
I was naked now and stomped toward the bathroom. I wanted to take a shower and forget the miserable encounter with Elyse. Allison followed and watched with a fair bit of skepticism.
“Jack?” Her voice was stern.
I yanked the shower door open but stayed on the bath mat. I stared straight ahead at the tiled wall, conflicted.
“What is it? What’s the matter?” Allison pressed.
“I need sex,” I answered bluntly, my eyes still trained on the inside of the shower. “Can you accommodate me tonight?”
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her take a step back. I turned and saw just how much her face registered shock. She crossed her arms, and I knew my less than romantic overture offended her.
When she answered me, her voice was frigid. “I’m not interested in being your consolation prize.”
My anger flared. “Please give me some fucking credit!”
She turned and left me to my own devices. I stepped into the shower, pulling the door closed behind me. I ducked my head under the steaming water and wrapped my hand around myself as I tried in vain to forget my unhappiness.
I went to bed right after my shower, overcome by the exhaustion of the day. I slept hard, and when I woke the next morning, Allison wasn’t with me. Her side of the bed was made, leaving me to wonder if she’d slept elsewhere.
She was cooking breakfast and I was hungry, so I dressed in a white T-shirt and jeans and made my way to the kitchen. I took my seat at the table with more caution than usual, pondering how best to gauge her mood. She poured some coffee into my favorite cup and sat next to me as soon as she set the mug down on the table. She took my hand in both of hers, surprising me.
She spoke with delicate care. “I haven’t seen you this upset in a long time. It worries me.”
I squeezed her hand, hoping to offer reassurance. “I’m better this morning.”
“Only a little bit.”
I looked down at our hands just as Allison moved a finger over my wedding ring with tenderness.
“You never take this off,” she remarked. “Not when you’re working around the house. Or taking a shower.”
I swallowed the lump of emotion that seized my throat. “That’s true. I’ve worn it since the moment you placed it there.”
Allison’s smile held a mixture of fondness and heartache.
“Did Elyse try something with you?”
I blinked at Allison’s directness and didn’t respond right away.
“This is important,” she added. “Don’t hold back from me.”
“I don’t want to upset you,” I said with sincere honesty.
She nodded and looked me in the eye. “I know you didn’t fuck her. That’s pretty obvious.”
“I haven’t fucked her in almost seven years.”
Allison trembled, but only just a bit. “Did you want to?”
“Absolutely not.”
“Are you having second thoughts about leaving here?”
“None.”
“Okay,” she said with determination. “I believe you.”
“Thank you.”
We both remained still, and I wondered if we were both waiting to see whose anger would flare up first. She was the one to break the silence.
“When we get to Oregon and start therapy, we’re going to have to dredge up some ugly things.”
I wanted to say I understood this, but I froze in place.
“It’s the only way for us to move forward,” she said. “You need to put the past behind you physically. I need to do so emotionally.”
With this stark revelation from my wife, I nodded. “Elyse thought she had an opportunity. She tried to take advantage of it, but she has nothing I want. I walked away, and I’ll never see her again.”
Allison leaned forward and kissed me on the cheek. Then she released my hand and stood up from the table. She began to move away, and I wrapped my hand around her wrist to stop her. She looked at me with expectation.
I held her gaze. “You were right to say no to me last night. I acted like an asshole. I’m sorry.”
“You came home when you could have chosen otherwise. Let’s focus on that instead.”
Allison pulled her arm from my hold, and I allowed my fingers to fall back down to my lap. She ran her fingers along my worried brow, a small, encouraging smile forming on her pretty face.
“We have a lot to get done before the movers arrive. Let’s get to work.”
“It’s not too late,” Allison murmured as she reached down to collect three bowls from the floor. “I could call Diana right now. I know she’d take the cat. She’d only be moving next door, and she could stay in the one place she knows.”
I shook my head as I set our pet’s transport crate on the floor. I kneeled to unzip the flap on the end. “No. She’d miss us.”
“Heide and I, she’d get over by the end of the day. She’d wonder what happened to you, but she’d move on, eventually.”
“We already bought her a plane ticket.”
Allison chuckled. “Please don’t remind me of that, Jack.”
“I can’t leave her behind,” I admitted. “It’s been almost ten years. We’re her family.”
“She’s not young anymore. Aren’t you worried about the stress of the trip? Flying cross-country on a noisy jet? Taking her to a new house?”
I shook my head with affectionate pride. “No. She’s tough. You weren’t there when I found her. She’s a survivor. How many cats do you know swim around in Chesapeake Bay until a boat just happens by? She made sure I didn’t drift by without noticing her. We’ve been together ever since. I won’t leave her now.”
“But Kitty Hawk on a six-hour flight, Jack? I’m not sure your relationship is that strong.”
“Nonsense. The spirit of aviation is right there in her name. We’ll be fine.”
“I guess. I don’t know why I’m worried about it. You’re the one who gets to find out.”
I smiled and wandered toward the closed door of the sunroom. It was the cat’s favorite place to nap and the natural choice to keep her as the movers dismantled our Baltimore home.
It was time for me to leave for the airport and the cat was coming to Oregon with me. Allison and Heide would stay behind in Maryland for another four days. They were scheduled to arrive at our new home on the same afternoon as the moving van. After just two weeks on the market, our house was in escrow—much to my delight and some of Allison’s chagrin.
Everything about the move to the Pacific Northwest had fallen into place, and I was positive it meant something good. Something right. During my salary negotiation, Robert Brighton had surprised me with a generous signing bonus. It was enough to help us put a down payment on a home in Bend with enough left over to lease a new car. I’d sold my aging sedan to one of the other neighborhood fathers, who was looking for a safe automobile for his college-bound daughter. It was August, and we would be able to settle in Oregon just in time for Heide to begin the new school year there.
Even Kitty Hawk was cooperative, running right to me when I entered the sunroom. She allowed me to lead her into the pet carrier, just as I’d trained her. I’d spent my last night in Maryland and was prepared and eager to leave for our new home in Bend.
It was all unfolding perfectly.