WHEN WE returned to the agency, the staff switched gears and was prepared for the evening’s reception. I muddled through the rest of the afternoon, second-guessing our detour. I tried to distract myself with projects that were helpful but required little mental energy. I searched in vain for a way to forget my mistakes of the day.
Allison arrived at the reception twenty minutes behind the main surge. Given her former career in broadcasting, it wasn’t like her to be late for anything, but I’d been so busy greeting one new person after another that I hadn’t had any time to stop and think about that. When she found me, I was catching my first bit of respite. I was deep in conversation with Kathleen.
Allison approached us, dressed immaculately but looking out of sorts. I did my best to draw her into our conversation without derailing it. I had one goal in mind and knew that Allison was smart enough to realize when I was trying to strike a deal. I draped my arm around my wife’s waistline, pulling her close to me in welcome.
“Kathleen. This is my wife, Allison.”
Kathleen extended a happy smile and reached out to shake hands. “Hello, Allison. It’s so nice to meet you.”
Allison shook Kathleen’s hand. “Hello.”
“We had an excellent meeting this afternoon with a longtime prospect,” I told Allison and gestured to Kathleen with my free hand. “It was spontaneous, but Kathleen and I pitched it together and it was brilliant.”
“Jack made the deal happen. All I did was set up the meeting and make the introduction.”
“Not true at all,” I disagreed. “Kathleen knows everyone and everything about Bend. She made the whole thing feel more like a neighborhood get-together instead of one of the biggest deals of the month.”
“Of the year!” she beamed.
“We’ve stumbled onto something here,” I told them both. “Having us tackle the meeting together worked to the firm’s advantage. I was thinking about drafting up a proposal to Robert, asking if you and I could keep working together to take on some of these prospect assignments he’s so excited about. What do you think?”
Allison tensed within my embrace as I waited for Kathleen’s answer.
“I agree. I’ll have no problem setting the meetings, and your advertising experience far exceeds mine.” Kathleen glanced to Allison. “He thinks so fast on his feet.”
“You have no idea,” Allison responded. She smiled, showing that she was making a joke, but her posture remained rigid, and her hands were clasped in front of her body. She hadn’t reciprocated my embrace, just merely tolerated its existence.
Just then, Tracie approached Kathleen. “Robert needs you to come say hello to Ted.”
“Right. I’m sorry to dash away, but you haven’t seen your husband all day. Have a glass of wine and catch up for a few minutes.” Kathleen turned away and took a few steps before spinning back around and pointing in my direction. “Oh! But don’t go too far, Jack. I’m guessing Robert’s next move is to get you interviewed for The Bulletin. That’s why he’s calling me over now.”
“Got it. We’ll stay here.”
Satisfied with my answer, Kathleen bounded off with Tracie. I turned to Allison and leaned down to kiss her temple. She stepped away from me before my lips could brush her skin.
I was perplexed but gestured to a nearby table with two empty seats. “Come sit with me. Was the traffic bad? You’re late.”
I began walking, but noticed when she didn’t follow me. I stepped back toward her and took her hand in mine, leading us both to the table. She didn’t resist and took a seat when I pulled out a chair for her.
“Let me get you a glass of wine. All right?”
Allison appeared conflicted but glanced around the busy room and nodded.
When I returned a few minutes later, I drew the other chair toward hers and sat close, trying to afford us as much privacy as possible in the crowded room.
“Is something wrong?” I asked in a low voice.
Allison’s politeness subsided as soon as she took her first sip. “By now, I should know better. Why am I continually surprised by the things you do?”
“Me? I’m the one you’re upset with?” I was astonished. “I don’t understand. Everything seemed fine when I left for work this morning. You made me coffee. We talked about Heide’s first sleepover. We didn’t fight on the phone about this afternoon. In fact, this morning on the way out the door you…”
Realization dawned on me and my humiliation was immediate. If I’d screwed up my afternoon with Kathleen, it was nothing compared to what I’d just done to Allison. “Oh, fuck,” I whispered. “Our therapy appointment.”
Allison glared at me. No more words were necessary to convey her anger and disappointment.
I scrambled to apologize. “I didn’t skip it on purpose,” I stammered. “I just zoned out. I’m so sorry.”
Allison looked at me in rage and disbelief. When she responded, the low tone of her voice turned my blood cold. “You zoned out?”
My mind was blank. My wife seethed in her chair, waiting for me to respond, and all I could focus on was making sure no one else could overhear our argument.
“Jack!” Her demand for attention snapped me out of a stupor.
“We can’t talk about this here,” I told her, desperate to move on to neutral subject matter.
“We can’t? Or you can’t?” she challenged. “Here we are once again.”
Against my better judgment, I muttered, “And where exactly is that?”
“In this place where you hurt me, and I’m just supposed to suck it up and be the forgiving wife.”
“Not now,” I hissed. I refrained from slamming a frustrated fist down on the table and glanced around at the crowd. My blood pressure receded once I saw that we had not drawn attention to ourselves. My eyes sought Allison’s once more. “There is too much on the line here tonight. What’s done is done and we can’t fix it here.”
“You’re the one who’s screwed things up.” Allison jabbed my chest with a solitary finger. “You’re the one who needs to fix things, not me.”
“Fine,” I told her, hoping to bring a semblance of peace back to the current situation. “I will take care of this. Please. Can we just move on to something else?”
Allison shook her head. “You’re always so worried about what your colleagues will think. Your reputation is so precious when it comes to your career. If only your reputation as a husband was half as important. Why isn’t it, Jack? Why do you care so little about what your wife thinks of you?”
“Your opinion matters, Allison,” I said but with an exasperation I could no longer disguise.
Her eyes roamed the room until they came to rest upon Kathleen Brighton on the other side of the lobby.
“If we were still in Baltimore, I’d know exactly who to blame for your distraction and why.” Allison jutted her chin in Kathleen’s direction. “Is she the one I need to be wary of now? I know she distracted you this afternoon with some big meeting, but please go ahead and tell me about how she did it. If she got you to forget about your marriage counseling, she must be my new competition.”
Everything was spinning out of control, but I owed Allison an explanation, as lame as the truth might be.
“Don’t be ridiculous. And don’t blame Kathleen,” I said. “This is my fuck-up. I didn’t make it back to my office after lunch to review my schedule. That’s what I usually do. I hadn’t cemented the appointment in my brain for this afternoon, that’s all.”
“What are you telling me, Jack? That our marriage isn’t worth thinking about away from home?”
I became flustered yet again. “Of course not.”
“What you just said makes no sense at all.”
“I really am sorry,” I tried. “I don’t blame you for being angry with me. But let’s set it aside for now and talk when we get home. Don’t make me say this again. I can’t get into an argument with my wife in the middle of a party being held in my honor and filled with colleagues and clients.”
Our glances both darted in Kathleen’s direction just as she turned and beckoned me over. I rose from my seat and straightened my suit to occupy my negative energy. As I walked away to join Kathleen and the rest of her group, Allison glared.
“Don’t keep me here longer than need be,” she said. “The sooner we go home, the less time I’ll have to sit here and stew about it.”