Chapter 48 (Breslin)
The light from the bathroom stretches across the carpet briefly before I hear Asher's footsteps pad over to the bed.
A moment later, the sheets rustle and then his big body is behind me, caging me in with the heat of his buttery skin.
Instinctually I burrow closer to him, seeking his warmth, basking in his touch.
“I didn't mean to wake you,” he whispers, running a finger up my bare back, leaving goosebumps in his wake. “Landon called—”
I don't hear the rest of his statement because my heart skitters and then restricts at the sound of his name.
Landon. The other man I love.
The one who I'm undoubtedly hurting by being in this bed.
It doesn't matter that what happened between me and Asher doesn't feel wrong, and that technically speaking, it's not fair for Landon to be upset about it.
Landon drew the line in the sand and we hopped right over it tonight without a second thought.
I know because the look in his eyes when I last saw him still haunts me. Just like the distraught expression on his face when he asked me if I loved Asher does.
I don't know how I can ever explain this to him—because I have to— without losing him.
I can't lose him.
“Baby?” Asher questions, turning my chin to look at him. “What's going on?”
I don't answer him. Instead, I find his mouth and the sinking feeling in my chest quickly turns to rapid flutters when he parts my thighs and settles on top of me.
The first thrust is so good, I claw my nails down his back, desperately seeking more. More of this escape, more of him. More of us.
I reach up and touch his face, wanting to memorize this moment forever because it's going to rip my heart and soul out when I can't have it anymore.
His brows furrow, his sweat soaked body and delicious thrusts coming to a halt. “Don't, Breslin.” He encloses my face with his palms. “Don't check out on me. Don't end this.”
It feels like my heart is being pulled in two different directions and I'll never be whole again—because I need them both; in equal measures, for entirely different reasons.
Those blue eyes, so full of longing and intensity imprison me and I can't help myself. I fold, I bend, and I break. “I'm not.” I run my hand down his jaw. “I'm right here.”
I raise my hips and cling to him for dear life and when he stammers out a breath and drives into me...
I immerse myself in his universe and let myself fall for him once more.
I know what the future holds for me tomorrow—but right now?
I want my supernova to keep burning me until I'm nothing but ash.
The sun shines brightly as we continue traveling down the highway. We ended up getting a later start than we anticipated this morning, but as long as we don't hit any traffic we should end up making it back in time for our afternoon classes.
Asher brings my hand to his mouth and kisses my knuckle, his eyes trained on the road ahead as he drives. “It's gonna be okay.”
I pull my hand back. I don't know how he can be so calm and optimistic about this when I'm close to puking with every mile that brings me closer to Landon.
I'm absolutely terrified about how he's going to react when he finds out. My stomach jolts and I bring my knees up to my chest, trying to shove down the thoughts bouncing around in my head and my heart.
I love him. I don't want to lose him.
Asher may be my universe, but Landon's my home.
He gives me the kind of security and love that no one else can...and if I was forced to choose.
No.
I glance at the clock on the dashboard and when I see that despite the lack of traffic we're still running behind, I decide to call Kit and tell her that I won't be able to meet her for lunch after all.
I frown when it goes to voicemail. Since I hate leaving those, I text her instead.
Breslin: Hey, looks like we're getting back later than I thought. Want to meet up for dinner after classes?
I shrug off my concern when she doesn't respond. She did just finish working a shift at the coffee shop this morning, thanks to me. She's probably resting before her class starts.
I wipe my now sweaty palms on my jeans and tell myself to calm down.
Asher quirks a brow at me. “You okay?”
“I'm nervous.”
He starts to open his mouth but then the sound of his phone ringing snags his attention. Before I can tell him that he shouldn't be talking on the phone and driving at the same time, he brings it to his ear.
“Speaking,” his gruff voice answers.
When his face falls and he pales, the tiny hairs on my arms stand up.
I assume it's the hospital calling about his father, until he says, “Thank you, Officer. I'll call you if I hear anything.”
“What's going on?” I ask the second he hangs up.
I have no idea what to make of the expression on his face right now and it's scaring the shit out of me.
“That was the Truesdale Police Department.” Both of his hands grip the steering wheel. “It turns out that last night on the way to the precinct, a police car hit a patch of ice and ended up in a ditch.”
“That's terrible, but why—”
“Kyle was in that car.” My stomach clenches and his eyes cut to mine. “But when they found the vehicle, both officers were dead and there was no sign of him.”
“Oh my God.” I bring my hands to my face as the full impact of what he's saying hits me. “It happened last night? That means he could be anywhere right now. Why did it take them so long to find the car?”
“According to the officer on the phone, the precinct was swamped because of the storm and no one realized that those two officers didn't return until the shift was close to ending. They didn't find the car in the ditch until sunrise.” He rubs his jaw. “They figured they would find Kyle's body around the area because they didn't think he'd survive out there in the storm, but now since they can't locate him and he was close to a highway, they're starting to suspect that maybe someone gave him a ride.”
He looks at me again. “They've issued a nationwide APB for Kyle as a precaution and the officer wants me to call him in the event that he tries to contact me.” He sighs. “The only thing I can do right now is wait and hope they find him.”
The idea of waiting around like sitting ducks makes my stomach bottom out. “I think we should go to the police station.”
“We can if you want, but I don't think there's a reason to right now. For all we know Kyle's dead and they just haven't found him yet. Probably buried under the snow somewhere.”
His tone along with his words might be placid, but the look on his face tells me a different story.
I start to argue again but my phone lights up with a text message. Panic wraps around my lungs when I see that it's from the college.
Emergency Alert: Active shooter on campus. Get to a safe area and take precaution until further notice. Avoid the Dining Hall and any areas in the vicinity. If off campus, remain off campus. Woodside University is on immediate lockdown.