i ran my hands under my glasses to rub my eyes, releasing a long breath. The door clicked shut behind Hannah as she left, and I just stood there, staring after her, completely dumbfounded.
What the hell just happened?
One minute I’m trying to comfort her, knowing it was probably a lost cause after the heartbreak she just endured, and the next, she was kissing me, something I’d only dreamed of since our first kiss when we were kids.
But I didn’t want it.
Did I?
Amy was the only thing on my mind at that time, and I embarrassed Hannah terribly by pushing her away. I could have probably been a little nicer about the whole thing, but I honestly wasn’t sure where her head was or if she’d even see reason. With the way she’d been acting lately anyway, it was hard to tell.
People in her situation often went looking for the next thing right away. It happened all the time. A rebound. They’re wanting to bounce back. That was what Hannah was doing. It had to be.
Or maybe she was acting on the feelings she’d been hiding the entire time. Feelings that, up until a month or so ago, I felt for her as well.
Talk about confusing.
I couldn’t dwell too much on it. I needed to find Amy and apologize. If I continued to be the fuck up I seemed to be, I was going to lose everything.
Chances were, I lost Hannah tonight. Her pride would destroy our friendship. I honestly wasn’t sure I would be able to be friends with her either, but, whatever happened there, I couldn’t bear to lose Amy too.
I grabbed the keys to my mom’s old car, the car my parents left me as a backup. I was very grateful. I needed something after I wrecked mine.
I didn’t want to have to worry about Hannah. I couldn’t let her suffer this alone. I may not know where we stand right now, but I wasn’t a complete dick. I pulled out my phone and opened a quick text to Erica. She would know what to do.
Hannah caught Justin cheating. She needs a friend.
I didn’t wait for a reply before running out of the house. Well, walked as quickly as I could with this stupid boot on my leg. I got in the car. After starting it and raising the garage door at the same time with the remote, I pulled out of my driveway in the direction of Amy’s apartment. It was late and I probably should have called first, but I was acting on impulse. I had to see her.
I had no idea what I was going to say to her when I got there. I wasn’t even sure if she would talk to me. She hadn’t seemed as mad as I had expected her to be when she left, but I could tell she was hurt that Hannah texted me in her time of need, and I didn’t turn her away. Even after our fighting earlier.
I never wanted to hurt Amy. She was the only person I’d ever met that seemed to understand my relationship with Hannah. She trusted me with Hannah. I didn’t know how many women I could say that about. It was damn near impossible for people of the opposite sex to be friends anymore. There was always that jealousy, that insecurity that it was something more. In most people’s eyes, there was only room for one.
Hannah, for example, seemed to think that. It was the basis of our argument earlier. Amy never implied I had to choose. She was always so understanding, offering advice when needed, keeping quiet when I didn’t need it. If anything, she wanted my friendship with Hannah to continue. She knew the importance of that bond and wasn’t about to come in the middle of it.
There was no doubt in my mind that I was completely in love with that girl.
I parked the car at the curb across from Amy’s apartment and sat there, staring at her building. I hadn’t really thought this through. It was three in the morning. I couldn’t very well ring the buzzer and wake everyone else up. I didn’t want to call for the fear of hearing her voicemail pick up when she hit ignore. I wasn’t about to do something as impersonal as texting. I sighed and was about to get my phone out of my pocket when I noticed someone at the small playground next to the apartment building, with his or her back to me.
Please let it be Amy.
I got out of the car and shut the door as quietly as I could. I didn’t want to startle the person sitting on the swing. Walking slowly, hoping the sound of my boot wasn’t as loud as I thought it was for fear some startling someone who wasn’t Amy, I made my way across the street and onto the sidewalk in front of the main doors.
It was Amy.
I recognized her outfit, the one she’d put on when she left my house. I breathed out a sigh of relief.
Her head was down as she gripped the swing’s chains in her hands. She wasn’t wearing a coat, and the air was definitely too cold to be without one. If she’d been out here since she left, she had to be freezing. I wasn’t wearing one either.
“Amy?” I called softly as I slowly made my way closer to her.
She didn’t jump at my voice, and she didn’t turn around. The closer I got, the louder her small sniffles were for me to hear. My heart broke all over again for hurting her.
I didn’t say anything else at that moment. I just walked in front of her, feeling myself tear up at her defeated posture. Her head was down so I couldn’t see her face at first. I just kneeled in front of her not caring about the boot on my foot, right in between her legs, and wrapped my arms around her waist. I held her tight as I buried my head into her stomach.
She shuddered. Because of me, the cold, or the fact she’d been crying?
I can’t even describe how amazing it was to feel her arms wrap around my shoulders and her head to rest on top of mine. I squeezed her tighter, not wanting to let her go, and she returned the gesture. Reluctantly, I pulled away, but I didn’t release my hold. Neither did she. I looked up into her red-rimmed eyes and her beautiful, slightly puffy face. I hurt all over again for her.
“Amy, I am so sorry.” When she nodded but didn’t reply, I continued, “I should have listened to you.”
I brought a hand up to cup her face, gently brushing away the tears that stained her face. Her big brown eyes stared intently into mine, and I swear, she could see right through me.
I didn’t think. I just acted.
Raising myself a little on my knees, I pressed my lips to hers softly. She kissed me back almost instantly, and I couldn’t resist anymore. My other hand came up, and I cupped her face in my hands as I deepened the kiss just slightly, giving her a chance to stop me.
She didn’t.
Her arms slid down from my shoulders to my waist, and I could feel her gripping my shirt in her hands. I gently bit down on her bottom lip and she moaned softly, causing me to groan into her mouth. I needed to stop now. If I had my way, I’d have her on the ground in just a few seconds.
“Amy,” I whispered as I pulled away, keeping my face close.
She gazed into my eyes, and I was going ahead full speed now.
“Amy, I love you.”
She gasped softly at my declaration.
“I don’t know the exact moment I knew, but I should have told you sooner. I was scared.” I chewed on the inside of my cheek. Her mouth was hanging open. “I’ve never felt like this about anyone before.”
My heart was pounding in my chest, and I couldn’t calm my breathing down. Everything was on the line now.. If she didn’t love me back, that was fine. I just wanted her to stay. I needed her to give me another chance.
We sat like that for what felt like forever, but I wasn’t about to rush her. This would be her decision. If she told me to leave right now, I would. I just wanted Amy to be happy. I wanted her to be happy with me.
“I love you too, Marcus,” she said softly, so softly I was afraid I heard her wrong. “I think I always have.”
My heart stopped but in the very best way.
I stood quickly, wrapping my arms around her waist and bringing her to her feet at the same time, only she didn’t stay on her feet very long. I had her up in the air, hugging her tightly. She giggled a little, her face buried into my neck. Her lips brushed my skin as I put her back on her feet.
She looked up at me with a soft smile before reaching up to kiss me again, which I gladly returned. We stood like that for a few minutes, lost in kisses when she finally pulled away. I almost didn’t let her.
“Come back to my house.” The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them. She looked hesitant, and I realized how demanding I sounded so I quickly added, “Please.”
She nodded, and I took her hand to lead her to the car. Remembering her lack of a coat, I let go of her hand to wrap my arm around her shoulder, rubbing the bare skin of her exposed arm, hoping the friction would warm her up a bit. We made it to the street when she stopped me and stepped out of my hold.
“I’m gonna take my car,” she said.
I was hesitant at first, concerned she might change her mind and come back home before making it to my house, but her smile reassured me. That and the fact that she stepped back into my arms and kissed me in a way that left me wanting more. I was always wanting more when it came to her.
“Okay. Be careful.” I leaned down to kiss her again and watched her get in her car before crossing the street to get back into mine.
Once inside, I turned on the car and waited for Amy to pull out before following her down the street. It felt like it was the longest drive. I was still a little worried she would come to her senses and turn back around. I didn’t deserve her patience.
As soon as we got to the house, she pulled into the driveway, leaving enough room for me beside her. That was a great sign to me. She was comfortable here. Otherwise, she would have parked on the curb, right? Everyone else did.
I waited until she got out of her car before doing the same. She met me in front of our cars and took my hand, letting me lead her inside.
I closed the front door behind us and pinned her against it without even thinking about it. I needed her. Pressing my hips against hers, I crushed my lips to hers. Her moan told me she felt the same way. Talking could wait. Right now, we both wanted the same thing. We both needed the same thing.
Without warning, she jumped up and wrapped her legs around me, making me grin against her lips. I walked down the hallway to my bedroom, where we had just been a few hours ago, feasting on each other. I was more than willing to do it again. Damn near begging.
I laid her down on the bed and hovered over top of her. Both of us were breathing heavy in anticipation. I kissed her again hungrily, and she returned it with just as much force.
“I need you, Amy,” I groaned against her lips, my cock throbbing in my jeans against her. I knew there would be an imprint of my zipper.
“Then take me,” she moaned. It was one of the sexiest sounds I’d ever heard.
Fuck. I didn’t need to be told twice.