Chapter 30

Erica

"You want a salad?" I leaned into the living room an hour later to find Matt cuddled up on the couch with Zek. How I had gone from not being sure that I was going to let him back into my life to agreeing (non-verbally) to let him stay the night was a mystery to me.

"I'd love one. You want my help?" He glanced up and smiled.

He so belonged right there on my couch, in the middle of my living room. Much like he belonged in the center of my world. Scary enough, if I wasn't careful, that world would quickly come to rotate around him. That was never a good place to be, especially not with a 'runner' on my hands.

"No. You stay there. I'll get it." I worked to chop up a few things and made both of us big chef salads before setting the table and calling him over.

He moved up behind me and ran his hands over my shoulders and down my arms. "You still haven't accepted my apology."

"I'm trying to work through all of that." I stifled a moan as he leaned down and pressed his mouth to the side of my neck, kissing me so sensually it hurt. His soft lips moved to hover just beside my ear.

"Tell me if there is anything I can do to help you get there faster. I'll apply pressure to any part of what you're struggling with if you need me to." He kissed my ear and I shivered.

"I'm good, but thank you." I moved out of his hold and sat down, ignoring the deep pulsing pleasure building between my thighs. The man could take me from cold to blistering hot in a matter of minutes. It was almost disturbing.

"Anything for you." He moved around me and sat down, reaching for his fork. "So I think I'll keep my place in Dallas until just after Christmas and then I'm going to take two weeks to go over to Saudi Arabia with Sophie and then I'll move up here for good."

"Sophie?" I tried to keep the angst out of my voice, but he could sense it. I could tell by the way he glanced up.

"She's my best friend since I was a kid. Mean as a fucking snake when we were little, but she got better. Sort of." He snorted and shoveled a big bite of salad into his mouth.

"Why is she going to Saudi Arabia? Work?" I wasn't comfortable with the idea of Matt having a female best friend, but it really wasn't my place to say anything. Where we might be headed back toward having a relationship, we didn't have one yet. Not really.

"Yeah. She's a reporter for NBC." He gave me a cocky smile.

"What was that smile for?" I picked up my fork and glanced down at my plate, pushing the salad around a little.

"You're jealous." He laughed.

I glanced up. "No, I'm not. You and I are barely friends. Why would I care that you're spending two weeks with a woman who's pretty enough to be on the news channel in a foreign country?"

"Oh, wow." He took another bite of his salad and got up, putting Zek in his cage. He moved toward me and reached down to pull me out of the chair. "Tell me you’re jealous."

"No. I'm not." I stiffened in his hold.

He gripped one of my hands and pulled it down, cupping his erection. "It turns me on to think you are. Just pretend for me."

"Matt," I mumbled and brushed my thumb over the head of his cock. "Don't. I'm not ready for this."

"Of course you're ready for this." He leaned down and kissed me. Hard.

I opened up, turning my head and sucking on his tongue the minute he pressed it into my mouth. Why was I giving myself over to him again? He would just end up hurting me.

"Stop thinking," he mumbled against my mouth and gripped my hips, lifting me. "Legs around my waist. Now."

I wrapped myself around him and breathed in deeply, wanting so much more than I should have. "I'm jealous."

"I know you are." He kissed me a few more times as his strong fingers dug into my ass, massaging it. "I love it."

"Should I be?" I rolled my hips, working myself against him like the starving slut he forced me into becoming.

"Not at all. There's only one woman I've wanted for the last two years." He moved up toward the bedroom, never once loosening his grip on me.

"Please tell me it's not this Sophie chick." I pressed my breasts to his chest, loving how incredibly strong he was. No one could make me feel small, petite, feminine like he could.

"No, baby. It's you. You knew that though." He gripped my hips and forced me to slide down the front of his body. "Accept my apology. I'm not running again."

"Lies," I whispered and pulled my shirt over my head. A scream left me as he tackled me to the bed, his mouth hot and wet against the top of my breasts, his hands tearing at my pants to get them off.

"I'll just have to prove it to you, Erica."

"Just fuck me, please. No more talking." I cupped his face in my hands and leaned down to kiss him as he threw my yoga pants across the room and snapped the front of my panties, popping the sides and laying waste to them. "I loved those."

"I'll get you more." He moved up to lick at my throat. "Take your bra off."

"Do it yourself," I challenged him. The docile, fun-loving guy who'd captivated me from day one was nothing like the man above me.

He glanced up and smiled before moving back and forcing me to turn on my stomach. I yelped as he popped my ass hard.

"So bossy. Someone needs to teach you a few lessons." He unhooked my bra before sliding his hands down my back, over the steep curve of my hips and squeezing my flesh. "So fucking hot, baby."

I pressed my hands to the bed above me and lifted my ass in the air, teasing him. "Hard to believe you wanted to walk out on this."

"I'm a fucking idiot." He gripped my legs and moved to his knees before pressing his mouth against me. I wasn't at all expecting it.

"Matt," I gasped and tried to pull from him, but his hold was tight. Almost too tight.

"Relax and let me taste you." His voice was deep, gravely, delicious.

Whether it was right or wrong, I didn't care. I needed the carnality of the moment. We could figure out the damage of our night together tomorrow. I needed tonight, and by the way he worked his tongue against me, he needed it too.

I pressed my face to the bed and cried out as pleasure raced through my center, stealing my breath. "So good."

"Yeah, you are." He flicked his tongue over my clit before sucking it in his mouth. The painful press of his fingers gripping my ass was more than enough to throw me clear over the edge of ecstasy. "I can taste you. You're getting close."

"Harder," I mumbled and closed my eyes, diving into what he must look like kneeling behind me, his arms wrapped around my legs, his hands clamped down on my flesh as he worshiped me with his mouth.

My orgasm slammed into me full force, and I arched my back and cried out before pressing back on him and rocking my hips hard.

"That's it." He rolled his thumb around the entrance of my body, dipping it in as I continued to cry out over and over. "Come for me again."

"No. I need a-"

"You need to listen." He pressed his finger into my body, jack-hammering it as I writhed with pleasure. "Come again."

I worked myself against him until the world exploded. All the air in my lungs rushed between my lips and left me stunned, overwhelmed. Matt wouldn't relent until I begged him to.

He moved back and I rolled over and pulled my knees toward my chest.

"Fuck," I whimpered and rolled onto my side.

He didn't say a word as he got a condom, pulled his jeans off and rolled it onto his thick shaft. His t-shirt was thrown into the pile of clothes near the bedroom door and he moved to the edge of the bed.

"My turn." He bent his knees and reached out, grabbing my leg as I lay on my side and pulling me toward the edge of the bed. "Have I told you how much you mean to me? Was that part of my apology?"

He pressed into me and paused as I reached up and grabbed his neck, bringing him down so I could make love to his mouth.

"No. You haven't told me." I whimpered against his mouth as he crawled up on the bed and pressed his body against mine, forcing me to stay trapped on my side, my knees up, the position perfect for the deep fuck we were headed toward.

"You're all I think about, Erica. No one else captivates me like you do." He kissed me once more and extended his arms as he sunk down into me.

I groaned loudly and bit my lip as he rolled his hips, massaging my body with his. "I love it."

"Good. It's all yours." His eyes darkened a little as he held my stare. "I love how well you take me inside your sweet, tight body."

I moaned again and reached up to run my fingers over his shoulders. "I want to face you."

"Turn on your back." He pulled out and moved just enough for me to shift on my back. "I want it deep tonight."

I mumbled my agreement and bent my legs around him, pulling them up to where the top of my thighs rested on my breasts.

"Such a good girl." He glanced down and slid back inside of me. His dark blue stormy eyes returned to my face. "My girl."

I wanted to call myself his girl, but I couldn’t. Instead, I gripped his arms and moaned over and over. He let loose, rocking the entire bed with his deep thrusts. The excitement of being trapped below him while he opened up the more alpha side of his personality was exhilarating.

"All mine." He forced my legs down and pressed his chest to mine, locking me in a tight hug as he pressed forward and tapped against my g-spot.

"Oh, God, Matt. Please don't stop." I dug my fingers into his back as the pressure inside me built higher and higher.

"Breathe, baby."

I sucked in air and screamed his name as electricity rolled from my center, snatching away any reserve I might have been holding back from him. I twitched and jerked my hips to ride the wave of pleasure he provided, never wanting it to stop.

He brushed my hair back and continued his strong, deep thrusts, not giving me a chance to change our pace or rhythm. It was all him.

"I love it," I mumbled against his throat. "So much."

"Me too, Erica." He licked at my ear and bucked faster. "Hold tight and let me know if I hurt you."

"Yes," I whispered and tucked my face against the crook of his neck as he enjoyed himself for the next half hour. His muscles tightened as he lifted up and worked me for a minute more.

"Oh, shit. I'm gonna come." He glanced down at me, cupping the back of my head with one hand and holding himself up with the other. "Watch me."

"I am. I wanna see." I let my eyes run down the length of our wet bodies before forcing myself to capture the expression on his face as he cried out.

Beautiful. Intense. Beyond sensual.

"Fuck, you feel so damn good. I could do this all night." He rocked his hips forward before crashing down onto me.

I wrapped him in a tight hug and kissed him a few times as we lay there panting together.

"All night, hm?"

"Yeah. Give me five minutes and then you're up." He licked at my mouth. "I like reverse cowgirl, unless you're shy?"

I smirked. "Not hardly, and I don't even need five minutes."

We took turns bringing each other pleasure half the night, but when it was over, I wasn't sure I wanted him to stay. He had my body, but I was still trying to hold on to a piece of my heart.

"You want me to stay or go?" He brushed my hair back as he pressed me to the bed.

A million thoughts brushed by my mind. I desperately wanted him to stay, but if I woke up and he was gone again... I would be destroyed. Maybe it was prudent to save myself the pain.

"You can go. Just check on the puppy and lock up on your way out. I have work in a few hours." I kissed him and brushed his hair back.

Sadness moved across his handsome face. "You sure?"

"Yeah. I enjoyed tonight, but I really do want to take it slow, Matt."

He smirked. "Slow. All right."

I rolled onto my side as my heart ached. Sex was a good first step, right?

If so, why did it feel so shitty to watch him walk out?