Parker organised with Vi that a PI she knew would tag Andrew. She’d told him it was a priority and to start right away. After Park had finished the phone call, I suggested takeaway instead of a dinner out someplace. Though Easton wouldn’t have it. I could tell Parker, like me, didn’t like the idea, but we went for Easton.

“Guys, he only got out today. I don’t think he’ll be jumping out from behind any bushes anytime soon. Not that there are bushes around,” Easton said as we walked to the front of the pub Easton picked to eat at.

I glanced at Parker to find he was doing what I had been, scanning the area for any type of trouble.

Easton sighed. He took my hand then went to grab Parker’s but stopped. “Relax, both of you. He can’t do anything to me here in Victoria.”

“You’re gonna have to give us a pass for being paranoid,” Parker said.

“He’s right. We’re gonna be on edge until we know for sure Andrew won’t do shit. We’ve seen a lot, East. Some people are fucked up.”

“I know,” he said. “Okay, I’ll stop hounding you two about it. Besides, it’s kind of sweet you both want to protect. Let’s just eat, then we can get home.”

“To do what?” I queried with a smirk.

Easton blushed. Parker caught it and grinned. Looking to his feet, he shook his head. Then Easton went ahead and started muttering, “You know, I mean, we don’t have to do anything, and I’m not even sure Parker will…” He looked around and leaned in to whisper, “…stay the night. We can’t expect it every night and really, are we all rushing into this? Since we got back from Queensland, Lan and I haven’t slept apart. Have we jumped straight into—”

I grabbed his arm and spun him my way, laying a hard kiss on him. Pulling back, I asked, “You good?”

His chest rose and fell rapidly. He nodded. “Yes. I think things just got on top of me and… I don’t want to mess this up.” He glanced at Parker. “With either of you.”

“You won’t,” Parker replied. Easton opened his mouth to say something until Parker shook his head. He rocked back and forth on his feet with his hands in his jean pockets. “How about we talk while we eat?”

Easton nodded. I leaned in and kissed his neck. Taking his hand, I tugged him in through the pub door after Parker.

We got led to a table in the bistro area. I sat on one side with Easton, and Parker sat opposite. We all ordered a beer and asked the waitress, who was eating Parker up with her eyes, if it was too early for dinner. She told us it was fine before she skipped off to get our drinks.

Easton flicked the menu open and studied it, but I knew he wasn’t really seeing anything; he’d be thinking of what he said outside. Worrying if he went too far with putting it out there. As far as I was concerned, we weren’t moving too fast. And as for Parker, I’d been interested in him for a long time, and in my opinion, Easton and I had ten years to catch up on. Hell, I wasn’t getting any younger. I just didn’t know how Parker felt.

The waitress came back and placed our drinks on the table, brushing up against Parker. She must have been a fan of long hair because she even flicked it off his shoulder with a giggle when he gruffly said thanks for his beer.

“He’s not interested. Can we just order?” Easton snapped. Parker and I both looked at him. “What? I’m hungry.” He gave his order to a glaring waitress. I said mine, and then Parker ordered. The woman stomped off with a pout after Parker ignored her fluttering eyes.

Easton took a gulp of his beer, set it down on the table and then pulled his fork closer to spin it. I watched him with a smirk. Parker looked on with his lips twitching.

“All right,” I said. “I’ll start. No, I don’t think we’re rushing. I don’t want to go for even a night with sleepin’ in a bed alone. I like having one or both of you close to me because I see this could be something good. Even with the times we’ll argue.”

Easton bit his bottom lip and nodded. “I feel the same. However…” He glanced at Parker. “You’re new to this, and this, meaning the three of us, is a lot to take in, so maybe we need to back off a little. I mean, it’s only been two nights together, and Lan’s already talking about living in a house together, the three of us. I know it’s too soon, so I want you to know if you feel it’s too much, please tell us, and we can take a step back.”

Parker listened to us both as he stared down at his beer, gliding his fingers up and down his glass. “Couples do sleepovers. It’s what we’re doin’ until we know for sure this’ll work.” He glanced up to Easton and then me, his eyes warm. “It’s good to fuckin’ know you both think about me in your futures. But for now, let’s just take each day as it comes. Hell, I could freak out about somethin’ tomorrow, and you guys could get over havin’ to placate the newbie. We just need to see how shit works. There’ll be nights I won’t get a chance to spend the night, but it won’t be tonight.”

He wanted us that night and we’d give it to him. Whatever he wanted.

He leaned forward. “What I do know works for me is your reaction when women get too close, but you both don’t need to worry about that because all I can think about, and see, right now is you two.”

Fuck me. That was hot to hear.

“Do we have to eat?” Easton whispered.

Parker smirked and sat back. “Yeah.” His smirk morphed into a big smile. “Tell us how much shit did Oliver give you for gettin’ hard?”

Easton groaned. “It was sweet to call, but next time don’t. I don’t think I’ll ever live it down because I kept thinking about it all night long, so my problem didn’t go down until we got a call to Mr Hinkson’s house.”

“What happened there?” I asked, resting my arm along the back of his seat.

Easton shuddered. His lips thinned and he shook his head. “I can’t talk about it really, but let’s just say no man should stick what he did up there.”

“I’m good without hearing all the details,” I said.

“Fuck. Wasn’t he eighty?” Parker asked.

“Yep.” Easton nodded.

Even after the shit we’d heard about Andrew getting released, the meal ended up being good because it was shared with two people I cared for. We talked about random things, work for Easton, the new careers for Parker and myself. We argued about football teams. We laughed together, we smiled, and we just enjoyed each other over the course of the meal. I fucking loved every second of it.

It was how I pictured many meals to come in our future. If it was together, I could really see how happy I’d be.

With them.

Sounded soppy, but I didn’t give a shit. I was happy. Never thought I’d be so damn happy, but there I was, smiling and thinking about the two men with me as we made our way into Easton’s house.

Parker stepped aside after he entered and I walked through the door, shutting it behind me and locking it. Easton already headed for the kitchen. Parker rubbed his stomach and groaned. “I seriously need to hit the gym tomorrow. You in?” he asked me.

“Sure.” I nodded. Easton came back out with three beers. I took mine with a smile and sat on the couch, flicking on the TV. A game had not long started. “What about you, East, want to work out with us tomorrow?” I asked.

He shook his head, taking a seat next to me, and Parker sat in the chair. “That could be hazardous. I’d be too busy watching you both and end up hurting myself. I’ll stick to the one at work for now.”

Parker snorted and glanced at me, grinning. Now he knew. “You were checking me out those times you were supposed to be spotting me with the bar.”

I took a sip before answering, “Yep.” His eyes changed, darkened. It seemed he liked knowing how he distracted me.

Then they changed and got serious. He stared down at his beer and announced, “Sundays I go to my brother’s grave.”

I stilled, shocked he’d shared that when he didn’t talk about his family at all. Fuck me, he was opening up. Easton went to say something, but I clamped my hand on his knee. He looked up at me, and I shook my head before refocusing on Parker.

He still studied his beer bottle. “We had a shit life.” He shook his head. “Fuck that, our lives weren’t shit, our ma was. We made what we had better. We had each other, and to us, that’s all that mattered.” He glanced over at the dogs out the back. “I was eighteen, and I wanted one night for myself. One night where I could get off with the chick I’d been into. I shouldn’t have left. I didn’t fuckin’ think, too busy worryin’ about my dick than the amount Erin… my ma had drank that day.” His jaw clenched over and over. “I got home to find Erin over Shawn, stabbin’ him.” Easton gasped; his hand flew to cover his mouth. “I’d never felt that type of fury before. It took over. All I could see was my brother lying dead on the floor in a pool of blood, but she was still layin’ into him.” He sucked in a shuddering breath. He faced us, his eyes hard. “I went over there, grabbed her hair, then her hand with the knife and sliced her throat open.” He stopped, staring at us as if trying to tell us something or perhaps waiting for us to run from the room yelling murderer.

It wouldn’t happen, and he shouldn’t have expected that. Especially from me. We’d seen and done shit by helping the Hawks MC that wasn’t legal, but we still thought was justified in our own eyes.

“W-why are you telling us?” Easton asked.

His eyes sliced to Easton. “Because I need you both to know everything about me. If this goes to where… if it stays like this between the three of us, you need to know who you’ve got in your bed.”

“Who do you think that is?” I asked.

“A murderer. You know I don’t follow the rule book, Lan.”

“Yeah, and you know I don’t either.”

He shook his head. “I killed a drunk. She had an addiction, a disease that could have been helped, but I ignored it and kept livin’ my own life with my brother.”

“She was the adult. She should have helped herself for her children’s sake,” Easton said harshly.

“I sliced her throat open and I still don’t care about it. If I could go back, I’d hurt her in a different way, in a way she could suffer for the rest of her life.” He stopped, glared and stated, “I’m not a good person.”

“I don’t care,” Easton whispered. “You did what any eighteen-year-old would have if they’d seen the same. No matter if she was your mother or not.”

“East’s right. We don’t care.” My brain began to put together all of the missing pieces, everything that I knew about Parker, the small gaps where I’d struggled to make sense of his behaviour and actions. “This why you hold yourself back from so much? You don’t want to get close in case someone fucks you over in some way and hurts you? Or that you’ll be worried you’d have to hurt them for something they do?”

He shrugged.

He lived a life so damn guarded. Christ, my heart ached for him. For him feeling he had to hold back from people because of his cunt of a mother.

“How didn’t you go to jail for it?” I asked.

“Told them I got home to find them like that. They investigated and concluded she killed her son in a fit of drunken rage and then killed herself after it.”

“Christ, Parker. I’m sorry you went through that.”

He sat forward, shaking his head. He put his beer on the coffee table and stood. His hands threaded through his hair. “I shouldn’t have left him there. It’s my fuckin’ fault he died. I’ll never forgive myself. I—” He growled in the back of his throat. Tears threatened to fall from his eyes. “I need to leave.” He started for the door.

“Parker,” I called, pulling my keys from my pocket. “Don’t drive, here.” I threw them at him, and he caught them. “Stay at my place, but don’t go far.”

He looked down at the keys long enough for Easton to stand and walk over to him. Easton reached up and slid his hands to Parker’s neck. “The memory of that is not something that will ever go. But it doesn’t mean you can’t forgive yourself for trying to be a teenager. It sounds like you loved your brother very much, so I know he would have loved you back just as much. It’s how I know he wouldn’t want you to carry that guilt forever. He also wouldn’t want you to think you’re not a good person because you killed someone who was supposed to love you unconditionally; instead they harmed, they… murdered someone very important to you.”

Parker stared down at Easton, with a look of awe on his features over Easton’s truthful words. Guilt was a fucking bitch and stayed with a person until they could work it out or learn to forgive. Parker was holding onto it as he blamed himself for his brother’s death. I could understand why, and I wasn’t sure if he would ever let go. But the least Easton and I could do was help him, show him he deserved to be happy, no matter what he did back then.

Fuck, it explained so much. His standoffish, cold attitude. In the last couple of days, I’d seen a new side to Parker, and the selfish bastard I was loved it too much to let him take it away from us, especially because of a misplaced sense of guilt where he’d convinced himself he didn’t deserve to feel happy.

“Parker,” I said gently. Easton stood back, his hands dropping. But rather than backing away, he took one of Parker’s hands in his. Parker glanced over, turmoil shining in his eyes. He didn’t know what to think or say. “Appreciate you sharing with us. Just know we take you for who you are, not what you’ve done. You’ve told us, and we’re still gonna want you. Nothing changes. You still want time, you take it, but we’ll be there for you in the end.”

His chest rose and fell quickly. He closed his eyes and sucked in a sharp breath, letting it out slowly. He shook his head before he opened his eyes. “I’m gonna stay. You both make me want to stay. Make me want to believe, and trust, and fuckin’ feel.”