Chapter 33

Tanner

Ava had called me five times but hadn’t left a single message on my answering machine. That told me she wanted to talk to me, but after giving her the chance at the office earlier that day, I felt like it would be pointless. I wanted to hear the truth from her, the complete, unguarded truth, and until she could do that for me, I wasn’t interested in what she had to say. I was tired, dead tired, of the lies, the keeping me in the dark, and the constant pushing and pulling that went on between us. I didn’t want her any less than before, but I was starting to go insane trying to keep my life together and chase after a girl who only wanted to be chased half of the time.

I sat on my couch, drinking a beer and staring out the window at the nighttime skyline of the city. It was so beautiful with the twinkling lights and brightly lit buildings and instantly made me feel more at ease. As I lay there daydreaming, the house phone rang. I groaned as I pulled myself from the couch and shuffled over answering the call.

“There is a young lady name Ava here to see you,” the guard said.

I wanted to tell him to send her away, tell her to go, just go, but there was no way I was going to be able to leave her sitting down there, especially when she had come all the way from her place to mine. She obviously had something she needed to say, and I figured there was no harm in listening. Who knew, maybe she was going to be completely honest. Maybe she was ready to fix what was keeping us apart right now.

“Send her up,” I said with a sigh.

I pulled on a sweatshirt and checked myself quickly in the mirror before walking out into the living room. I could hear the elevator outside of the guest entrance beep and the doors sliding open. I walked over to the door and opened it before Ava could knock. I looked down at her and was taken aback as tears flowed from her eyes and down her cheeks. I stepped to the side, and she walked in, heading straight to the couch and sitting down, covering her face with her hands. I closed the door and stood at the edge of the living room, not knowing how to comfort her. She was trying to talk to me, desperately trying, but between the sobs and the hands over her face, I couldn’t understand a single thing she was saying.

My feet started moving before my brain could, and before I knew it, I was sitting down next to her, rubbing her back and trying to get her to calm down. She dipped her head into her hands and sobbed silently into her palms. I wasn’t sure if she was crying over us, over everything that had happened, or if something else had struck, and I was just unsure of it. Either way, she needed to calm down in order for us to even attempt to have a conversation.

I sat there feeling completely helpless, not knowing what to do. Suddenly it came to me, so I lifted my hand to her chin and turned her toward me. I leaned in and kissed her lips, tasting the salty tears on her skin. Instantly, she began to stop crying and her sobs turned into heated moans. I grabbed her waist and pulled her close to me, feeling the heat between us rising. She was so beautiful, even when she cried. And as I held her in my arms, I remembered how I had promised her father that I was going to take care of her and protect her from everything. I wondered if that meant protecting her from herself as well. In that moment, though, as our kiss grew hotter and deeper by the second, she felt like the Ava I had fallen for in the first place. She felt like the passionate woman that I lusted after long before I was able to tell myself that I had more feelings than that for her.

I reached down and rubbed my hands up her thighs, feeling the tight jeans encasing her legs. She reached her hands up and twisted her fingers through my hair like she always did. I loved feeling her playing with my hair. It was so personal, so erotic. Instantly, my pants grew tighter and tighter as we both came up for air, not caring about anything else. I moved my lips over her cheeks and down her neck, tasting her, moving her, and calming her nerves. This wasn’t her telling me the honest truth, but it was definitely a step in the right direction. As I went to move my hand further toward her crotch, she reached down and grabbed my hand, pulling her head back and breathing heavily.

“I can’t do this,” she said shaking her head. “At least not until I tell you how I feel.”

I nodded my head and scooted back, giving her some space to think. If nothing else, that show of affection had calmed her enough that I could now understand what she was saying. Her eyes were red and her lips were swollen from crying so hard. I reached over and grabbed a tissue, handing it to her. She smiled as she took it and wiped the tears off of her face. I really couldn’t wait to hear what she had to say, though I didn’t know what to expect at all. Everything had been so back and forth since we met that she could be spilling her guts, coming up with excuses, or she could be there to completely tell me off. I could feel the nerves in my stomach floating around, hoping that she was opting for candor and not anger, something that I hadn’t seen in her yet.

I quickly got up from the couch and jogged over to the fridge, pulling two bottles of water out before heading back over. I opened one and handed it to her, knowing that with the ferocity she was crying, she needed to refresh and renew herself before she could possibly start to formulate sentences. She took several big gulps of the water and sighed happily, using the tissue to wipe the last remaining tears from her cheeks. She was breathing heavily, and she looked really nervous. Just from that reaction, I wasn’t expecting anger from her, especially since when she was angry, she usually came in full speed ahead.

“I’m a mess,” she laughed through her raspy voice. “I was okay until I got into your elevator, and then I lost it.”

“You don’t need to cry,” I said softly. “I’m here. Tell me what’s on your mind.”

“I love you,” she said. “I’ve loved you for a long time, but my brain just wouldn’t let me comprehend that. We have been through so much, and I know that we’re perfect for each other. You were right. I was a coward, and though I wanted to be with you, my brain was telling me to stay away. From that, I started getting angry at you for everything. I was trying to push you away in a way that made me feel okay about it. Then, I would get home and realize how much I miss you, how much I love you.”

I sat there listening to her talk, watching her face as it began to light up talking about us and our possible future. I felt like she wasn’t just saying these things to me, but she was saying them to herself as well. She had finally understood what I was trying to say and had humbled herself down enough to take the chance on coming here, not knowing if it would be something I reacted to in a good way or not.

“I know that I have been up and down and back and forth over the last few weeks,” she said blushing. “But I am being dead serious when I tell you that I love you and want to be with you. I tried to get you off my mind, especially earlier on, but no matter what I do, I think about being with you and what that really means. I want to have the career, the family, the boyfriend, and everything else life has to offer me. I don’t just want any man in my life, though. I only want you in it.”

“Even after everything we’ve put each other through?”

“Especially after everything we’ve put each other through,” she said with a smile. “My father talked to me on Sunday morning and gave me his full blessing. He gave us his full blessing, really. With the way I feel now, I didn’t have to have that blessing, but I feel a hell of a lot better knowing that my family is on board with my choices. It gave me the ability to know we could be together without any more outside issues. You could be a part of my entire world, not just the parts that were behind closed doors. I am dead serious about all of this, no going back or letting fear rule me like it tried to on a regular basis.”

“Ava,” I said with a sigh. “I love you, too. I’ve been waiting forever for you to just be open and honest with me about how you felt. I knew you were holding back and that you were scared, but I couldn’t be the one to force you to open up to me about these things. You had to make the decision to do so. You are one of the most amazing women I have ever met, and I can’t think of a better way to spend my time than working and living with you by my side. You have become my partner in crime, the woman who wanted me, not the CEO of MJ, but me, Tanner.”

“It is pretty sexy that you’re my boss.” She laughed and sent me a suggestive wink.

“You’re a mess,” I laughed, pulling her in close.

“So, you want to give this a go, be with each other completely?”

“That sounds absolutely amazing,” I said, pulling back and leaning down for her mouth.

I grabbed her shoulders and pulled her in toward me, kissing her with passion. She whined softly as our lips pressed hard against each other, and our tongues tasted the salt on each other’s lips. That moment felt so perfect, so right, and I couldn’t be happier with the way things had turned out. Finally, we could be a couple, a family, without secrets and stressors holding us back. We could make love and know the other person would be there the next day. We could have an argument and not fear that it was the end of everything. We could be a normal couple, well, as normal of a couple as she and I could get. On top of all of that, she would be working alongside me to grow and push MJ to the next level.

If two people could be so completely perfect for each other, it would be us. We were like two crazy puzzle pieces that fit together but was really hard to find. She pulled back, breathing heavily from the kiss, looking me deep in my eyes. She shook her head and giggled, and I smiled curiously.

“You’re my boyfriend.” She giggled.

“That, I am,” I said, laughing. “For as long as you will have me.”

“Mmmm,” she said, leaning her head on my chest. “I can’t think of anything better than having you in my life for as far as I can think into the future.”

I hated Mondays, but this one may have not turned out so bad after all. I had the career, the best friend, and I had just gotten the girl.