Chapter 23

Ashley

Moving was exhausting. I had spent all day yesterday cleaning up my old room and moving in. Jasper was taking Hank’s old room. I didn’t know why I had even worried for a minute about Jasper being upset by the move. He was loving the farm and didn’t seem the least bit upset about getting a new room and leaving our hold home behind. Kids were resilient. It was adults who struggled with change.

I would miss my loft and the city, but I knew this was the right place for us. It gave me a lot of comfort knowing I could keep an eye on my dad and make sure he got healthy again. This was my home now and I couldn’t dwell on what was. This was my future.

Walking into the kitchen to make coffee, I found my dad already sitting at the table. He was drinking an herbal tea that his doctor recommended he drink instead of his usual coffee.

“Good morning,” I greeted. “Did you eat?”

“No. Not yet. I’m not hungry,” he replied.

“Dad, you need to eat some toast at least. I’ll make you some,” I told him, not wanting to lecture, but I was here to make sure he got through the last round of chemo. He was almost done. He had lost a great deal of weight, but I was convinced we could put the pounds back on him.

“Thank you,” he mumbled.

I popped some toast in the toaster, put the coffee on, and went to sit with him, “How are you feeling today?”

“Tired.”

It hurt to see him so weak. All I could do was think ahead to the time when he would be healthy again. He would beat this. I had researched the disease and was confident this was the worst of it. His doctors were giving him an aggressive treatment to be on the safe side, and as difficult as it was, I was okay with that.

I gave him his toast. “Eat now, Dad. I’ll get your vitamins, and then why don’t you relax out on the front porch?”

He smiled. “You’re going to be mothering me, aren’t you?”

I grinned. “Damn straight I am. We got this, Dad. I’m here. You tell me what you need and I’ll take care of it. Don’t worry about a thing. I read that stress can make the side effects worse. You have nothing to worry about. The farm is taken care of. I’ll make sure there is food on the table, the house is clean, and everything else is fine. Rest and heal. That’s all you need to do.”

“Thank you. You’re a good daughter, Ashley.”

“Yeah, that’s why I’m your favorite.” I winked.

“I just wish you had more confidence,” he joked.

Chuckling, I popped in two more pieces of toast for myself.

“I’m going to pour Jasper a bowl of cereal and put some milk in a cup. If he wakes up before I get back, he can get his breakfast, okay? Don’t get up.”

He gave me an exasperated look. “I think I can handle pouring milk for the kid.”

“Yes, you can, but you don’t need to. Rest, Dad. I’m going to go check out the fields and see what we’ve got going on out there,” I told him, sitting down to pull on my shoes.

He grimaced. “I doubt it’s pretty. Let me know.”

“I will,” I lied.

There was no way I would tell him if it was bad. I didn’t want to add to his stress. The farm provided an income for him, but if this harvest didn’t do well, we would be fine. I would have extra money from the sale of the loft and would hopefully get some photography jobs. This harvest was not worth stressing about.

I poured my coffee in a travel cup and set out on my walk around the farm. I strolled through the rows of corn, inspecting an occasional ear here and there to make sure there wasn’t a pest infestation.

As I made my way to the rows of tomatoes, I inhaled deeply. I loved the smell of the tomato plants. It always made me crave spaghetti. The plants needed to be caged up. They were heavy with fruit and some of the vines were hanging low to the ground. I made a mental note to get out and do it tomorrow.

Next I inspected the rows of green beans and was happy to see they were in good shape. There were a ton of beans weighing down the bushy plants. They were ready to be harvested. It was a lot of beans. I wondered why my dad hadn’t had them picked yet. He had a crew that did the picking every year.

I spent nearly two hours walking through the fields, checking fence lines, and making mental lists of things that needed to get done. It was obvious the farm had been neglected for some time, and I wondered if my dad had given up. This used to be his passion, but I could see by looking around that he had stopped caring long before he’d been diagnosed with cancer.

When I got back to the house, Jasper and Dad were on the front porch sipping lemonade. Jasper was talking his grandpa’s ear off, and I bit back a laugh. So much for my dad getting rest.

“Jasper, can you go pick up the toys in the living room, please?”

“Okay,” he said, jumping off his chair and running inside.

“Sorry. I hoped he would go play and not bug you.”

“It’s fine. He was keeping me company. I’ve spent plenty of time not being bugged and I like having him around. Never apologize.”

I sat down in an Adirondack chair and leaned back, letting the warm breeze wash over me. It was a little too hot to be comfortable, but it felt good to be outside.

“How’s it look out there?” he asked, dread clear in his voice.

“Not bad. The beans are ready to be picked. Where are those guys that usually come out and help you harvest? They’re a little behind.”

He sighed. “They don’t come out anymore. I couldn’t pay them last year. I had hoped I would be able to this season, but that doesn’t look like it’s going to happen. I think we can pick enough to preserve for the family and the rest will have to sit.”

“No! Dad! You mean you didn’t harvest last year?”

He shrugged. “I did what I could.”

That explained a lot of his financial troubles.

“What about Hank and his kids?”

He smiled. “Oh, they’re busy. They came over and got a couple pots full of beans and some corn and tomatoes, but Hank’s wife isn’t much of a farm girl. She prefers her veggies from the store.”

I rolled my eyes. “She doesn’t know what she’s missing.”

“I agree, but different strokes for different folks. I paid to get the planting done with the hope I could do the harvest myself, but I don’t know if that’s going to happen.”

“Dad, we’re here. I don’t care if I have to drag Jasper out there every morning at five; we’ll get the harvest done. I’m not about to let all that food go to waste. The vegetables are beautiful. They will fetch a good price at the farmer’s market.”

He laughed. “Oh goodness. I haven’t been out there in years.”

“Dad!” I said in shock. “How have you been supporting the farm?”

He shrugged. This explained why he had no savings to speak of. He had been using it to get by. I bit back the need to lecture him. I had already done enough of that. No use rehashing the same conversation. It was done and in the past.

The situation was far worse than I had thought, and it was going to take a little longer to get him back on his feet. I was going to have a busy summer. I doubted I would have any time to take pictures. It had been a long time since I had done the farming thing, but I could do it. I would need a little help, though.

“Rest. I’m going to check on Jasper, and then I have a few calls to make,” I told him, patting his knee before I walked into the house.

The first order of business was calling Dad’s old friend Bill to see if he could put me in touch with any pickers. Hopefully it wasn’t too late in the season. I was sure the other farms around the area were already in full swing and had hired all the available help.

I left several messages with temp agencies and then started my list of things that needed to get done around the farm. It was rather extensive, but not everything needed to happen today. It would be a slow process, but I would get this place turned around and restored to its former glory. I loved a good project.

The rest of the day was spent organizing the kitchen, adding my dishes and appliances in place of some of Dad’s older stuff. After making dinner and getting Jasper off to bed, I checked on Dad. He was already in bed, snoring away.

After pouring myself a glass of wine, I headed out to the porch for a little quiet time. I sat down on the swing and gently swayed back and forth. It always amazed me how dark it was out at the farm. After living in the city for so long, I’d forgotten what it looked like. There was always a glow in the city, but here the only glow was from the stars above.

It was a clear night, which brought out all the nocturnal creatures. I could hear crickets chirping and the gentle “who-o-o, who-o-o” of an owl in the distance. I rocked back and forth, enjoying the break from the heat. The sprinklers were running, creating white noise in the background. I inhaled deeply, taking in the scent of wet soil. I could faintly smell the tomatoes as well when the breeze blew just right.

I remembered spending many nights out on the porch in this very swing. Most of those nights had been spent with Brock. We would sit and talk for hours about our future and make grand plans for what we would do. Those were good times.

Sipping my wine, I started making new plans. This was a fresh start for me, even if there was a little baggage. Things were different, but I felt like they were different in a good way. Dad would get better and with me here to take care of him. I could make sure he stayed healthy. I wanted to see him out there on his tractor, tilling the fields in the fall.

The thought made me smile. This was the first time in a long time that I felt content and like I was exactly where I should be. While I was in the city, I’d always wondered what was going on back home. Despite getting away and finding the adventure I had longed for, I’d always felt restless, like something wasn’t quite right.

As I sat there looking out over the corn quietly swaying under the moonlight, that feeling of restlessness was gone. I was home and I didn’t want to leave. Years ago, that realization would have scared the hell out of me. Today, it gave me a sense of peace and calm. I was finally settled.