7
Olivia
"No fucking way." Dana walked around my bedroom as I laid on the bed with my hands pressed to my face. To say I was a hot mess would have been a vast understatement.
"Yes. I'm an idiot. I should have looked into it the minute I met Luke."
"What? Why? Taylor is a really common last name, Olivia. Cut yourself some slack. These kinds of things don't happen, well, not to most people. You just seem to be uncommonly unlucky."
"Thanks." I rolled over and pressed my face to the bed. "I have to break up with Luke."
"What? Hell no." She crawled up on the bed and lay down on her side, propping herself up with her elbow. "You're not breaking up with Luke. You're going to show Caden Taylor that your life is all you wanted it to be. He fucked things up back in high school. Hopefully, he's suffering."
"My life is nothing like I want it to be." I rolled back onto my back as a sob lodged in my throat. "I've just buried everything so deep inside of me that I've created a new life around it. A fake set of goals and ambitions that have little to do with who I really am... who I was."
Hot tears burned the sides of my face as I counted the ceiling tiles and prayed that the floor would open up and swallow me whole.
"Then get back to being you." Dana reached over and brushed my hair from my face. "And don't you change a damn thing for that bastard."
"What if he's not a bastard?" My voice broke as I rolled on my side to face her. I hadn't felt so insanely vulnerable in more than six years. Caden Taylor wasn't just in the city, but at the firm I was going to work for, at the party I was going to that night, the brother of my lover.
"Then we work through it day by day. Moment by moment." She wiped a tear from my face. "You remember when your dad used to say that all the time?"
"Yeah. I do." I discarded the memory as I didn't need another reason to cry. Caden was enough. My father dying my freshman year of college was still too real. Too raw. Even after five long years had passed. I'd created a new me. One that fit beautifully next to Luke and would one day rule the world of finance, but I didn't feel much like that solid fortress in the moment.
"We're going to that party tonight and when you see him... you have two choices."
"Fuck no." I shook my head and sat up. "There is no way I'm going tonight. I can't imagine seeing him after all these years."
"I bet he looks like heaven." She sat up and bumped her shoulder against mine.
"Wait. Are you for him or against him?" I moved to the edge of the bed and glanced back at her.
"I don't know." She shrugged and flopped back down. "I feel like people deserve a second chance and maybe we didn't get the full story in high school, you know? I mean, seven years of being the best boyfriend ever and then you guys sleep together and he's all of a sudden a horrible asshole that doesn't give you the time of day?"
"I was a lousy lay. At least that's what he told everyone. Remember?" I swallowed my regret and got up. I wasn't a lousy lay anymore. I'd slept with enough guys to prove to myself that I was possibly the best lay in all of New York. I ignored just how badly that same truth hurt the parts of me that only wanted one man in my bed for life. That girl was dead and buried. Weak and stupid to believe in such a thing.
"That's bullshit and you know it." She rolled off the bed and stood up. "We're going tonight. You need to face the past and show it, or really him, that you're good. Put this to bed tonight."
"And if I crumble?" Tears blurred my vision. "If I can't keep the part of me that wanted him beside me forever tucked away, then what, Dana? Are you going to rescue me? Take me back to Dallas with you and help me start over?"
"You're not running from your life over this idiot. It was high school. You have to find a way to make peace with this. It's been fucking with you far too long."
I walked to the closet to grab the sexiest dress I had. "What if this was never supposed to be my life in the first place? What if it was just a way to recreate myself?"
"Then run hard and fast. Ignore me completely, because of all the people in my life... you're the last one I would have ever wanted to see change. Face him tonight and figure out what happened."
* * *
Nerves tore up my insides as we drove toward Kadia. I had to get Dana to drive because my hands were shaking so bad it looked like I had a form of turrets. Bile rose in my chest and threatened to put me on my hands and knees before the closest toilet if I didn't chill the fuck out.
"You all right?" Dana reached out and squeezed my hand softly.
"I will be when this is over. I'm going to have to go in completely bitch mode to survive this shit." I swallowed and reached up to turn the air conditioner vents toward me.
"I'll be right beside you all night. If you need to get out of there, we'll leave. If you need me to divert him, you just give me the look and I'll step in."
I laughed in spite of my insides turning to mush. "You remember back in school when we used the code words, ‘dill pickle’ to get help from a shitty situation?"
She laughed loudly. "Yes. Why did we pick such stupid words? Do you know how hard it was to squeeze in the words 'dill pickle' in the middle of a conversation with someone so you would know I needed help?"
I chuckled and pointed to the club. "Right up here on the left. The big, beautiful place with all of the lights."
"Is Luke already here? I'm looking forward to meeting this guy you've changed your persona for." She snorted and pulled up to the front of the club.
"I didn't change anything for him. Me changing just drew his crooked ass in like a moth to the flame." I got out of the car and ran my hands down the front of my black cocktail dress. I'd gone for business sexy instead of all out sexy. Grabbing Caden's attention and showing him what he was missing was only one of my objectives for the night. The other was to actually impress some of the people in Luke's office just in case I decided there was some way I could still take the position with him.
From a career standpoint, it was just smart, a great new step. From an emotional standpoint, I was fucking myself hard without lubrication. It was ugly.
"You look incredible." Dana moved up beside me and slipped her arm into mine. "You just stick beside me and I'll get you liquored up enough to relax."
"Please do." I smiled at my pretty dark-haired friend. The dark hues of her skin mixed with her warm brown eyes left me smiling. Caden would probably be quite surprised to see she'd grown up from the wiry little tomboy she'd been when we were kids to the beautiful girl she was now.
Had I changed at all? Being head cheerleader of our high school and fit as a fiddle back then, it would seem that if I did, it would be for the worst.
"Stop trash talking yourself and lift your chin," Dana mumbled from beside me as we walked into the expansive club.
"What? How did you know?" I forced a laugh as I pulled my I.D. from my wallet and showed it to the bouncer at the door.
"Your chin is pointed down and your shoulders are rounded. I've known you my whole life, remember? Hello." She snorted and pointed up to the third floor. "Why is it so dark up there?"
"Sex room from what the whispers on the street say." I shrugged and pulled my arm from her grasp. The last thing I wanted to do was to let anyone think I had a weakness. Luke only knew what I wanted him to know about me, which wasn't much. Our relationship was only surface deep, which was a good thing, seeing that it was going to most likely be over soon. There was no way in hell I could keep dating him or rather marry him with the notion that Caden and I would then be tied together forever.
Fuck that.
"Oh, my. How is the most beautiful creature in the world tonight?" Luke's hand slid over my hip and pressed to my stomach as he flattened his chest to my back and leaned down to kiss my neck a few times. "Hmm... how's my girl?"
"Great." I turned and kissed him before moving back. "Luke, this is my best friend, Dana."
He smiled and offered his hand. "Dana, so nice to meet you. I was starting to think that Olivia might keep everything about her past from me, but it's nice to see that maybe I was wrong."
"I'm not the only one with secrets." I gave him a cheeky grin and brushed my hand down his chest. He had a swimmer's body, lean and strong, but not at all the type of man that could make my body ache. His brother on the other hand... Stop it.
"Get you a drink and join us over there. I want to introduce you to everyone." He kissed the tip of my nose and ran his hand over my side to squeeze the top of my ass. "You mind if I tell them you're a new investment advisor that's considering working for us?"
"And your girlfriend? Oh, the stigma I'll have to overcome." I pushed at his chest a little.
"I quite like the idea of giving them something to talk about." He winked and glanced toward Dana. "But then again, Olivia will tell you that I'm quite the attention whore."
"Amongst other categories of a whore." I chuckled and turned toward the bar, motioning for Dana to join me.
"Damn," she mumbled. "He's insanely hot."
"You should see his brother." I sighed and stood in front of the bar top. "He's only gotten better with age."
"That's scary." She glanced over her shoulder.
"Tell me about it." Every cell in my body woke up at the thought of seeing him in person again. It had been far too long, and as scared as I was... I was equally excited.