Chapter Thirty-Nine
Matthew
Tuesday
I walked Ashlee up to the top of the highest peak in Florence, allowing us to look over the entire town, hoping that this would help her to clear her head a little bit. This was a place that I hadn’t been to for a long while, but when she first left town I used to visit it quite a lot, just trying to see things from a new perspective. I always found it good for getting out of my worries a little bit, and seeing that there was so much more to life.
Considering all that she’d been through in the past few days, Ashlee was doing surprisingly well, but I knew that there would come a time when she would likely fall right apart, and if it was going to be today, then this would be a good place for it.
As we finally sat down, looking down on everything, the tears flew down her face faster than they had mine, so I held her close to my side while she got it out of her system. Even as her fists balled up in a temper, and she began to angrily punch the ground, I simply waited for her. I didn’t say anything, I didn’t try to help, I just waited until she was ready. I was there for her, which was the trick that I hadn’t learned last time.
“I know that you don't want to talk about the past anymore,” I suddenly blurted out, probably shocking her completely. “And I agree with you that we need to put it behind us if we’re ever going to move on, but I just want to apologize for it one last time, and to tell you that I’m your future now. I will never be that person again; I will be who I’ve been today.”
“I know,” she whispered, before placing her hands on my cheeks and pulling me in for a kiss. “We’re both different, and if today has taught us anything, it’s that.”
That didn’t feel like enough. I felt like I had a little more to say. “I just really need you to know that you’ll never be alone. I know that you respected your mom and dad’s relationship a lot, and I will to my utmost to ensure that I give you a similar future. I will always respect you, I’ll always love you, and I will do whatever I can to make you happy.”
“As long as you’re mine,” she told me seriously. “Then I will be happy. You’re all that I’ve ever wanted.”
We held one another for a while, just allowing all of that to sink in, until Ashlee turned to me with another thought in her mind. “So, what does the future hold for us?” she asked, giving me a look that made me want to give her anything in the world. “I mean, what do you want?”
I knew that she wanted an actual answer, rather than me simply promising to do what she wanted, so I thought about that for a second, considering it wholly. Since I’d had lots of debts in my life, all I’d ever focused on was one day at a time, because all I’d ever wanted was to keep my practice open, but now I had options...but did that mean I wanted to go?
“I want to keep on being a doctor,” I finally answered her. “I mean, I know that you probably think I’m crazy since I won all that money, but all I’ve ever wanted is to help people.”
“No, I know,” she grinned at me, seeing me for the person I was inside. “I knew that you would never give up helping people, that just isn’t your style. Did you...want to keep on doing that here? Or do you harbor some great desire to move to California or something?”
I felt nervous about that; what if she thought I was small town if I admitted that I didn’t want to go? I mean, she had already been off on some great adventure to New York; she knew what it was like to live a bigger life. What if she wanted that again now that she didn’t have her mother tying her down?
“I... I don't know,” I took the cowardly way out, and didn’t commit either way. “What about you?”
She had an answer for me right away, as if it was something that she’d been thinking about for a while now. “I think that I would like to stay in Florence.” Relief flooded me as she said that, because it meant that we were on the same page. “I mean, I know that there’s a big world out there, but this is my home. I’ve never felt the same way about anywhere else as I have here. This has always been the place where I’ve been connected, and I think I can keep my parent’s memory alive better here.”
“Plus,” I nudged her playfully, “as we already know ourselves, this is a great place to raise kids.”
“It is!” she agreed with me quickly. “And since we’re going to have three, we want them to have somewhere nice to grow.”
“Three, huh?” I acted surprised, as if that wasn't exactly what I wanted. I couldn't imagine anything better than having three children with the woman that I adored. “I think we should see how we get on with one first. You never know; we might do a terrible job.”
After some laughter, and a light punch from Ashlee, her expression turned serious once more. “I would like to continue working at the practice, if that’s okay? I mean, I love all the kids there and I want to carry on the work that I’ve been doing.”
“Of course.” I thought that went without saying. I might have created the job for her, to help her out, but I couldn't be without her now. She was a life saver in the office!
“I also might like to write some informative books, using case studies, too. But of course that’s if you don't mind... It might take up some office resources and time.”
I leant in and kissed her hard, waiting for her to finally understand that she truly was the most important person in my life. I would give that woman anything that she asked for, especially when I knew it was something that she would be so damn amazing at. I could just see her, making strides in the medical world, influencing other practices, being featured on television, at seminars, doing book signings... it was the kind of success that she’d always deserved, and it felt amazing that I could help her to achieve that.
“You know you have my backing,” I told her. “I think that’s a fantastic idea!”
“I have never told anyone this, but I’ve always wanted to write,” she told me with a dreamy look in her eyes. “I’ve been making notes throughout my entire career, waiting for the chance.”
“I cannot wait to read what you finally get down on paper,” I told her supportively. “I just know that it’ll be amazing.”
She kissed me once more, showing her gratitude, and I simply fell into her embrace, allowing myself to feel the incredible way that she always made me feel. My heart pounded loudly, bursting from my chest, my emotions circulated wildly, and I found myself falling deeper and deeper in love.
“We’ll be together forever,” she told me, holding onto me tightly, making me feel special and loved in a way that I hadn’t ever felt before. “I just know it. We’ve always been meant to be, and now I feel like we can do it. We’ve grown up now, we’ve learnt some harsh lessons, and now we’re ready. It might have taken us a while to get to the right place, but it feels good to have made it, like a real achievement.”
She was right, I knew it right away, and it made a massive grin burst out onto my face. We had come far, and we’d made it back to one another, which spoke volumes about us as a couple. “I can’t wait for the amazing future that awaits us,” I said excitedly, pictures of what we could be filling my mind. “I love you, I love you so much and I really can’t wait for it.”
I always knew that Ashlee Baker was going to be the girl that I ended up marrying; now I could finally make that happen.