ADORE
I feel like a deer caught in the headlights of a moving vehicle. Except he's not moving, for as much as I desperately want him to approach me. If eyes could sear a soul, I would be burning. My body suddenly feels hot. He's the most handsome man in the room, and he's looking right at me.
I notice that he's the only one sitting at his table. That gives me hope that he doesn't have a girlfriend or a wife. But then my gaze falls to his chest, and I notice there's no number pinned to the front of his suit jacket. He's not here for The Virgin Dating Game, which means he's probably unavailable.
I tear my eyes away and try not to frown in disappointment. The last thing I want tonight is to be a part of a threesome. His girlfriend is probably in the bathroom or something.
“Are you ready to check out the private area?” Tanika asks me, already with one foot in the direction of the ominous door.
“Sure.” A hint of depression makes it to my voice. I glance back at the handsome stranger. He's in the process of standing up, his eyes no longer on me.
I follow Tanika to the door, and we leave our drinks on a table outside before entering. We wind our way through people before we stop in front of a large glass window separating the viewing area from bays of beds, two of which are occupied. On one, two lesbians are going at it. On the other, a woman is being pleasured by three men. She looks to be really enjoying it, just lying there while they have their way with her. The thought of experiencing something like that is arousing, but I don't think I'd have the nerve to let so many men go at me at once. I'd be worried about what I was supposed to be doing with all their dicks. The woman is stroking one of the guys while blowing another. The third man is eating her out.
“Wish I was her,” Tanika comments.
“Yeah,” I reply, mesmerized by the act in front of us.
“This is where you'll be having sex if you pick someone tonight.” She nods toward the beds.
“Really?” My body instantly tenses with nervousness. While watching other people have sex here is incredibly hot, I don't know if I have it in me to perform such a public display, especially for my first time. I expect that I'm going to be nothing but awkward. “Maybe I shouldn't.” I start to close up within myself.
“Nonsense.” Tanika looks down at me. “It's really not as daunting as you think. You'll be so focused on what you're doing that you won't even notice the people watching.”
“If you say so.” I fold my arms over my chest.
Everything in me is telling me that this is a bad idea. I feel like it's only fair not to waste anyone's time.
“I don't think I can do it.” I turn from the couples in the bays, ready to head back to the registration table and turn in my number.
“Well...” Tanika hesitates. “I mean, you don't have to. No one is going to force you to do anything.”
“Good. Because I don't want to.” I lead the way out of the area and into the main club, making a bee-line for the registration table.
My gaze flits up to the man I was looking at earlier. He's back at his table, and his eyes are glued to me. There's something different about him. Pinned to the front of his jacket is a white circle with a number.
“I changed my mind,” I tell Tanika in a hurry, stopping dead in my tracks.
“I can see why.” She smirks.
“Do you know him?” I pry for more information on the mystery man.
“No.” She shakes her head. “I've never seen him before. But he looks like he wants to get to know you.” Her voice takes on an excited lilt and she giggles.
I blush and avert my gaze for a fraction of a second before offering him a smile and an awkward little wave, knowing that I probably look like a complete dork. He raises his beer to me in distant cheers.
“Good evening, members of The SX Club, San Antonio's premier hangout for all things kink related,” a woman announces at the front of the club, drawing my attention away from my admirer. We listen to her spiel on how The Virgin Dating Game works, and then Tanika parts ways with me so that I can be seated with the rest of the 'virgins.'
This shit just got real, I think as I glance at my competition. There are six other women sitting at tables around me, hoping to find their mate for tonight. One is old enough to be my mother, so I know she's not a virgin. Maybe all of them are pretenders. I feel like it cheapens the experience, but who am I to judge. This is their domain, not mine.
There are about two dozen guys signed up for the event. They're corralled into a waiting area that the announcer called the bull pin and are made to wait their turn with each of us. My palms begin to sweat as I realize that the dating game is about to start.
The first man who is sat in front of me looks to be about twice my age. He has yellow teeth and a bad comb-over. I don't even want to talk to him, but politeness dictates that I carry on my five-minute conversation, which is mostly about what I would enjoy doing in bed for my first time. Every time he mentions my virginity, he does it with raised eyebrows as if to indicate that he knows it's all just an act.
The rest of the night is much of the same. Rarely does a decent guy grace the chair in front of me. And I don't mean decent looking. I mean a guy who doesn't immediately bring up sex.
I sigh inwardly, trying to remind myself that this is what this place is all about. If my mystery admirer and I do end up choosing each other, then we'll be having sex. Public sex. In front of everyone. My skin goose pimples at the thought, and I find myself glancing in his direction.
He's finally been fed into the lineup. Knowing that he's talking to other women before me makes me irrationally jealous—makes it difficult to concentrate on the conversations I'm trying to have with my other potential suitors. I find my eyes jerking to the side every few moments to see what he's doing—if he's smiling or appears to be having fun. By the time he gets to me, he might have found someone else he prefers, I think with a frown.
The anticipation of him reaching me is killing me. It feels like someone is holding me underwater and I'm struggling for just that one breath of air that could save my life. My hand itches to scribble his number down on my piece of paper, and I haven't even talked to him yet. There's no doubt in my mind that he's the only one I'd be willing to take a chance on tonight.
Finally, he's seated with the woman beside me. It's the longest five minutes of my life. The room feels hotter with each passing second. By the time the announcer tells the men that it's time to switch seats, I'm almost certain I'm sweating. Not very attractive.
Mystery Man offers me his hand when he reaches my table. When I go to shake it, he places a kiss on top of my knuckles. Heat climbs up my arm to cover my face in rosy pinkness.
“Hi there,” he greets me.
“Hello,” I stutter, just happy I'm able to form words.
He's dressed like James Bond but looks like Jon Bernthal. Short dark hair, dark eyes, a bit of facial stubble. Tall and broad. I find myself wondering what his body looks like beneath that suit.
“My name is Kellan,” he introduces himself.
“I'm Adore.” I watch him take his seat.
“Adore,” he repeats my name as if it's the sweetest thing ever. “Do you come here often?”
“No.” I shake my head, placing my hands on my lap. Is this where my hands should go? Oh God, I can't even pretend to look poised in front of him. “This is my first time here.”
“Mine, too.” His eyes sweep around the room before returning to me.
“Sooo,” I drag out the word, not sure how to make conversation with him. I'm so flustered. “What are you here for?”
He looks directly at me and gives me the most charming smile I've ever seen. “You. Just you.”