Missing You

We’ve been covering for him since. I thought I’d get to go back to New York sooner, but with the extra load I just haven’t been able to make it happen. I’m frustrated and tired.

It’s only been three weeks but it feels like it’s been so much longer. Our calls at night aren’t enough. Yet, I know I’m going to keep my word and give Kaye what she needs.

She needs time to at least see if she can build her own thing. For now, I’ve been doing my best to work through all of it. It’s killing me, but I’m dealing.

I give a tired smile to the one thing I’ve had to distract me. I have good and bad news for Brooklyn. I’m not done. I’ll get him everything he’s looking for, but it may be harder than I initially thought. Even for me.

“Hello,” Cole’s voice comes through the phone line after a few rings.

“Hey, you have a minute? I found Deja,” I say.

“Where is she?” he asks before I can fully get my words out.

“Scotland,” I reply.

“Fuck. Is she okay?”

“Yeah, well, she has been. The grandmother you told me about. That’s who she’s been with. The grandmother is on her deathbed. Doesn’t look like she has much longer. Small village, word is spreading,” I inform him.

“Fuck me. Son of a bitch. Fuck,” he growls. “What about Ciara?”

“No luck there. It’s not looking good. I found an obit for Donald and Iesha Walsh. Two children are mentioned. A baby boy and little girl. The trail goes cold after that. I’m still working,” I reply.

“Damn it,” he huffs.

“You want the location for Deja?”

“Have I killed a man?”

“I used the secure box. It will disappear in one hour.”

“Thank ya, Felix.”

“No thanks needed. Let me know if you need anything else,” I say and hang up.

I sit staring at my screen as if Ciara will appear. I know the answer is there. I just need to keep digging. I’ll turn over the right stone eventually.

I called in favors with my mother’s side of the family to verify the information I found on Deja. I know I can trust them. I put that fact in the message I send to Brooklyn in case he needs to reach out.

The O’Briens treat the McGowans just like flesh and blood. Brooklyn knows he can trust them. I’ve wondered a few times who the Walsh cousins are to Brooklyn.

During my digging I learned that while Angus Walsh raised Deja, she’s his adopted daughter. Deja was born in Ireland to a recently widowed military wife. Helen Walsh never returned to the States. Angus fell hard and fast for Helen and they married. Angus was the only father Deja has ever known.

His brother Donald Walsh was a hot cruiserweight boxer. He met his wife on a winning streak. He won a fight in the US and met her in a club his team chose to celebrate in. Ciara was born in Ireland a few years later.

I pull off my glasses and rub my burning eyes. I’ve been in front of these monitors way too long. I’m not going to pluck the answers out in this state. I need to walk away for a bit.

Leaning back in my chair, I close my eyes. I blow out a breath and push my fingers into my hair. My phone rings, causing me to twist my lips. I just need a few moments of silence, including from my own head.

Without looking, I reach for the phone bringing it to my ear. Anyone calling this phone is meant to have the number so I’m not worried about dodging anyone. A smile comes to my lips when I hear Dae-Dae singing in the background before I can answer.

“Hey, baby,” I rumble into the phone.

“You sound so tired,” Kaye replies. “We’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Hang up and I’ll spank your ass next time I see you,” I croon into the phone.

I’m greeted with silence from her lips. I know she’s still there. Dashawn is still in the background singing. I can make out his words as they’re on repeat.

“Mama, Dae-Dae, Lix,” he continues to repeat.

“I miss you guys too,” I say to her silence.

“He’s been driving me crazy for hours,” she groans. “I thought hearing your voice would get him to stop.”

I laugh. She sounds about ready to pull her hair out. He’s only getting louder by the minute.

“And yes, we both miss you. You should get some sleep,” she says softly.

“I’m leaving now,” I reply, as I force myself out of my chair.

I start to shut down, snatching my keys from my desk. I wasn’t going to get anything else done tonight. My head is starting to pound from trying to think too hard.

I need to head out for a bounty in the morning. It’s way past time to call it a night. I drag my tired body to the elevator.

“Dae-Dae, please,” she huffs away from the phone.

“Isn’t it past his bedtime?” I chuckle.

“Yes, Jamie came over and got him all hyped up. I’m going to kill him,” Kaye grumbles.

“What did he want?” I frown as I ask the question.

“Calm down, killer,” she giggles. “Connie asked him to bring over some stuff for Dae-Dae. Those two started horsing around and Dae-Dae has been bouncing off the walls since.”

“He’ll wear himself out soon,” I reply, as I jog down the stairs.

As tired as I am I should’ve taken the elevator, but I’m just too tired to wait for it. Besides, I’ve been sitting at my desk all day since after my morning workout. I can use the stretch.

“Put him—”

My words cutoff as I feel my hackles go up. Something is off. I start to pat at my pockets as if I’m searching for something, meanwhile I start to scan the lot.

“Damn, babe. I think I forgot something in the office. I’ll call you back,” I say into the phone.

“Okay,” she replies sounding disappointed.

I have to push that aside for now. I keep my attention on my surrounds as I cut the call and pretend to still be searching my person. I feel the moment someone starts to close in on me.

I keep my head down until the very last second. When they step in to me to grab me, I throw an elbow back, yielding me a satisfying crunch. Ducking down, I spin around until their back is to my front and I have the dude in a headlock.

“What do you want?” I hiss.

He refuses to respond, his nostrils flaring. I apply more pressure to his neck, cutting off his air. He struggles clawing at my arm. A sound to my left catches my attention.

I knock out the guy in my arms with a solid punch, dropping him to the floor just as another guy swings at me. I duck back out of the way seconds before his punch connects. Deflecting his arm with my left, I shove my right into his face so hard I see his cheek cave under the pressure.

A loud bellow comes from the asshole, but he’s not down for the count. He comes charging at me. I lead him in grabbing his shoulders and bringing my knee into his midsection. My elbow comes down into his back, dropping him to his knees.

Snatching a hand full of his hair, I tug his head back. “Who the fuck sent you?” I hiss in his face.

“Fuck you,” he says awkwardly.

A broken jaw and cheek will do that. I grab his face with my free hand and apply pressure. His scream fills the parking lot.

“Start talking before I rip your fucking face off,” I snarl.

“H...his information is...it’s in my phone,” he relents. “Last call—”

He doesn’t get to finish his words before I slam my fist into his face again. This time knocking him out. I search him for his phone.

My jaw works as I look down at the number in the phone. I tuck the phone away to do some digging once I get this mess cleaned up. Pulling my phone out, I make a call.

“I have a package in the lot at the office,” I say simply and hang up.

Locking the place down from my phone, I start back upstairs. This will all be taken care of. I need to know if this number belongs to any of my top list of suspects. I’ve been making a few enemies lately with some of the favors I’ve done.

Kaye

I flip in the bed, reaching for my phone to look at the screen for the hundredth time. As if I just happened to miss a call while sitting right here.

Nothing.

I chew on the inside of my mouth. Maybe he just fell asleep. I don’t want to wake him if that’s the case. He did sound tired. I know I’m exhausted despite not being able to pass out.

I roll my lips and turn them to the side. I’m never going to get any sleep if I can’t settle my mind. I know in my heart something is off.

“Fuck it,” I huff and dial his number.

I roll my eyes at the voice in my head telling me that Felix and the O’Briens are rubbing off on me. I don’t curse nearly as much as they do—thanks to grandma and her bar of soap. I smile at the fond thought of my grandmother.

The smile is followed by a sharp pain in my chest. Felix told me that my grandparents returned to Jamaica not too long after Dae-Dae’s first birthday. I’ve thought a time or two about going to stay with them.

“Hello,” Felix’s tight voice interrupts my thoughts.

I hesitate, feeling foolish for calling. My mouth flaps a few times. I think to hang up. Tomorrow when I talk to him, I’ll tell him I rolled onto it in my sleep.

“Kaye, are you alright?” He asks, his voice going from frustrated to frantic.

“I’m fine,” I answer quickly. “I…you never called back I was worried. I’m sorry to wake you.”

“You didn’t wake me. I haven’t gone to sleep. I’m sorry. I needed to take care of something in the office. I’m just walking into my place,” he says.

“Is everything okay?”

I sit up in the bed not liking the aggravation I hear as he speaks. It takes a lot for Felix to show he’s irritated. Something is definitely up.

“It will be,” he gives the ambiguous reply.

“Felix, you’re worrying me.”

I hear the sigh that he releases. I frown ready to hang up and go to sleep. I know he’s okay. I’m not going to be the annoying girlfriend that needs to know his every move.

“I don’t want you to worry. If you were here you’d see I’m fine,” he replies before I can exit the call.

“But I’m not there,” I mutter.

“Yeah, don’t I know it. I miss you. I could really stand to see your face right now,” he rumbles.

“I could come to you,” I blurt out.

“You don’t know how much I would love that, but now is not a good time,” he says, again aggravation showing.

“Oh, okay,” I murmur.

“Don’t do that,” he groans. “As soon as things settle here and I plug up some shit, I’m on my way to you. And if you want to come here, I’ll make that happen too.”

“Okay, let me know if there’s anything I can do for you. I’ll let you get some rest,” I reply.

“Actually, there is something you can do for me. As tired as I am, hearing your voice has me hard as a rock. You want to help me with that?”

My breath hitches. I have to squeeze my thighs together. I’m assaulted by images of our time together.

“How can I help you?”

The sound of my own voice surprises me. It’s thick and husky with lust. Forget sex addiction. I’m a Felix addict.

I start to bite the pad of my thumb when he doesn’t answer right away. I can almost hear him thinking. My toes fidget together as the anticipation builds.

“Don’t freak out when I tell you this. I only use them to make sure everything is okay there,” he says.

“What?” I ask in confusion.

“There are cameras in the apartment in all of the rooms. It’s the same system I put in all of my family’s homes,” he replies.

I drop the phone from my ear. Head whips from side to side, I look around the room as if I can see the cameras. Tugging my t-shirt over my knees, I curl into a ball like I can hide or something.

“You’re joking right?” I say, putting the phone back to my ear.

“No.”

“Have you been watching me?”

“No.”

“Felix,” I say in warning.

“I said, no,” he repeats. “I can start if you like. Actually, I want to watch you now. Will you do that for me?”

“Do what?” I frown at the phone.

He chuckles. “Never mind.”

“No, what do you mean?” I huff.

“Will you play with your pussy for me? I want to watch you come,” he purrs back at me.

“Seriously?”

“When it comes to that pussy, I never play. I could use the release. It will help me relax. The cams are on my secure network. No one else monitors them,” he says.

I sit silently thinking on this. He has cameras in my bedroom. I know what he does for a living. Should it really shock or bother me that he has cameras set up in my home?

I know he takes my safety very seriously. If he has the same system in his family’s houses, I should feel like family too. Right?

Although, let’s face it. He’s not asking any of his brothers to masturbate on cam for him. Is it sick that I’m a little turned on by the request?

“Come on, Kaye. You know you want to. I know you’re already wet. Do this for daddy,” he says silkily.

I pull the phone from my ear and lift a brow. “Daddy,” I mouth at the phone. I think we’ve both just lost our minds. I swear the way he says it has my girly bits pulsing. I’m totally wet for him.

Felix

Logging into my computer, I pull up the cameras in the New York apartment. I hold my finger over the mouse as I hover over the camera that will open up my view to her room. I wait for her to say the words. It’s her choice, always her choice.

“Okay,” she whispers.

My lips curl into a smile as I click the cam. Kaye comes into view sitting on her bed. She’s curled up with her knees in her chest and her t-shirt pulled down over her legs.

My smile grows when I see it’s one of my t-shirts. I know it is from the Mobb Deep logo. I was looking for that one.

“You look sexy as fuck in my shirt,” I say lazily.

I’m tired, but I need this. Not only do I miss her. Hearing her voice has all my blood flowing in one direction.

I hear her gasp, her head whipping back and forth. I chuckle as I watch her trying to figure out where the cam is. I have a head on view of her bed.

“You can really see me?” she asks, allowing her legs to slide from beneath the fabric of the shirt.

I lick my lips. Those thighs are going to be the death of me. I want to get lost in them for days. I bring up the memory of having them wrapped around me. I can almost feel their weight pressed against me.

“Look straight ahead,” I reply.

Her head straightens. She stares straight ahead, her brows knitting. She won’t see the cam. I use the best. It blends in perfectly.

“Like this?” she asks.

“Yes, take your hair down. I like tugging it while I’m inside of you.”

I expect my words to shock her, but I’m just as pleased by the response I get. Releasing her hair to fall to her shoulders, she dips her head and runs her hand through the front. When she lifts her head slightly, she’s looking up through her lashes in the direction of the cam.

I zoom in just a bit. She’s so fucking gorgeous. The small sassy smile on her lips reveals the real Kaye. The one I’ve had the pleasure to unlock. The camera is so sharp it reveals her brown skin and those brown eyes to me as if I were staring at them in the flesh.

Unzipping my pants, I wrap my hand around my cock. I don’t stroke, I allow the weight to rest in my palm for now. Kaye parts her legs in front of her slowly, setting my hand in motion.

Before I can tell her to, she places the phone on speaker sitting it on the bed. Then, she lifts the t-shirt up over her head. Those perky tits jiggle as she tosses the shirt aside. I would love to wrap my lips around those chocolate tipped nipples. I watch them tighten more as if I’m there to breathe against them, just before taking one into my mouth.

“You’re so beautiful,” I rasp. “Slowly, run your hand down your stomach into your panties. Don’t take them off yet.”

She follows the command perfectly. I lean back in my chair. Spitting in my palm, I go back to stroking slowly.

I can hear the harshness of my own breathing as I watch her throw her head back and rock against her fingers. The white of her panties is the perfect contrast. Almost as sexy as the sight of my skin against hers.

“Put your fingers in your mouth,” I hiss.

She pulls her hand from playing with that pretty pussy and pops her fingers into that sexy as fuck mouth. I think of my cock between those lips. Cursing myself for not having the real thing when I could’ve.

The ways she’s sucking the juices from her fingers, I can’t wait to be what she can’t get enough of. Sliding in and out of that wet, warm mouth. I start to stroke harder thinking about it.

“That’s my baby. Just like that,” I groan. “Take your panties off now.”

A grin turns up her lips as she reaches to wiggle out of her panties. I growl when the sight of her bald pussy is revealed on cam. She had a bit of a patch when I was last down there.

“Spread your legs wider for me. I want to see you play with it,” I say.

She scoots back against the headboard to prop herself up. Her legs spread wide for me. I can see that pretty flower just ready and waiting for me.

She parts the lips with her fingers and starts to play with her clit just the way I made her watch me do. She looks like she knows her body as well as I do. Yet, I know, no one knows that body as well as me.

“Pinch you left nipple, baby,” I order.

She reaches for her nipple, pinching it between her fingertips. My eyes are trained on her as her back bows and her hips rock. I can just feel her slick heat sliding up and down on me. Her tits in my face as she rides me. I stroke a bit harder, getting closer.

“Put two fingers in,” I husk out.

Her moan fills the air, echoing in my office. I release my own groan. My eyes focus on the pumping of her hand. I can see her juices dripping. It’s so fucking hot.

“Felix,” she cries out.

“I’m right with you, baby. Does it feel as good as when I’m inside you?”

Her hand moves from her breast to cling to the top of the headboard. She uses it for leverage as her feet dig into the mattress and she rides her own hand as if it were me. The look on her face is so hot.

She’s biting her lip. Her nostrils are flaring lightly. Her lids are fluttering as her eyes roll back.

“No, it’s not you,” she breathes, before sucking her lip back into her mouth.

“Good answer,” I pant at her. “Come with me, Kaye. Come just like you would all over my hard cock, when I’m deep inside you. Imagine me inside you and come.”

Her head starts to thrash against the headboard. I can see it. She’s right there. I wish I were there to catch every drop with my mouth.

“Fuck,” I hiss as my own orgasm rushes from my balls.

“Yes, yes, yes,” she calls out.

Damn. Only with Kaye. I love this girl.

Kaye

“God, yes,” I cry out.

I slump against the headboard, too spent to move. That was so dirty and sexy. His voice filling the room with his commands. The knowledge of his eyes on me while I pleasure myself. Hearing his heavy breathing and sound of him stroking himself were just what I needed.

He’s turning me out and I like it. I didn’t think I could love Felix anymore then I already did, but I was so wrong. I only want Felix.

“Sleep tight, baby. I’m coming to see you as soon as I can. Promise,” he says.

I hadn’t realized my lids were closing. I slide onto my side and finally pass out. Thoughts of what just happened bringing a sleepy smile to my face.