Chapter 44

Ethan

MY HEART WAS BEATING from my chest when I got out of my car and found the hidden trail leading to the lighthouse. Darrah and I had spent a lot of time in this familiar spot, but so much had changed from those summer evenings, watching the sun set into the Narragansett Bay as the boats went by. We were no longer that couple so in love. Instead, she was my biggest enemy. I climbed over the rocks and into the clearing with no sign of her. Staring out at the water with time to finally gather my thoughts, it dawned on me that maybe she’d played me, and this was all a diversion tactic to take Nolan and run. I paced back and forth over the rocky shoreline, feeling more foolish by the minute for falling into her trap.

“Ethan.” I turned to the familiar voice, but it didn’t belong to Darrah. Instead, it was Edward’s.

And Darrah had once again made a fool of me. “Wow, how didn’t I guess it would be you who showed up instead of Darrah? After all, you’re the mastermind behind this entire sick plan.”

“Why couldn’t you just leave it well enough alone? You were happy again with this new girl in your life. You were getting back into writing. You said yourself that story wasn’t your best. So, why couldn’t you just let it go?”

I let out a sarcastic chuckle. “Let it go and just forget my son is still alive after the three of you plotted this for God knows how long? You’re more delusional than I thought.”

He was visibly shaken as I approached him, taking two steps back for each step I took toward him.

“You watched me fall apart this past year and pretended to be there for me when the whole time you knew everything. You took my son from me the same way you took that shitty story, so you could have another feather in your cap.”

The vein in his right temple pulsated as he continued to back away, and I fought with everything inside of me to not wrap my hands around his throat and choke the son of a bitch to death.

“Ethan.” Her raspy voice called over the crashing waves, shifting my rage the moment I laid eyes on her. This woman approaching me, now a stranger. A stranger I hated with every fiber of my being.

“Goddamn it, Darrah, I told you to wait in the car,” Edward snapped.

My eyes burned into her, and she looked away. She was so close. Close enough to touch, just like in all those dreams that plagued my sleep, but this was real—all too real for me to take. Her long, brown hair blew in the wind and the first teardrop rolled down her face.

“Where’s Nolan?” I muttered with pure contempt.

“Please don’t do this just to spite me, Ethan.”

“I’m doing this to spite you? You stupid bitch, you took away the one and only thing that mattered to me.”

“He didn’t matter to you, Ethan. The only thing that mattered was your career.”

“You know that’s not true. I love him more than anything in this world!”

“The same way you loved me before deciding I wasn’t enough and then cheating on me. What would you have done when the love you had for him wasn’t enough? Would you have just dismissed him too? You don’t deserve him, and I will never let you have him.”

“My love for him will always be enough.”

She swallowed hard and pushed a strand of her hair behind her ear. “So, I was right. You did stop loving me. That’s why you cheated. That’s why you shut down on me. Was anything real?” she cried. “I loved you so much, Ethan. I still do love you. I was only with him to get back at you. This time away made me realize how much I missed you. Let’s run away and start over again, you, me, and Nolan.” She threw her arms around me, and I pushed her away.

“You’re sick. I want nothing to do with you. I couldn’t care less if you rot in prison for the rest of your life. I just want my son.”

Her eyes shifted in every direction, like an animal backed into a corner. “I can’t. I can’t let him back into your life without me. I won’t!” she shouted. “We’re still married. I’m your wife for better or worse... remember those vows you took with me? And I know we’ll get through this...you’ll see you really do love me and we belong together.” Her voice was riddled with desperation.

“I don’t love you. I despise you, and I don’t want anything to do with you. I just want my son back!” I demanded.

“This is because of her, isn’t it? The girl Edward said you’re with now? You want to steal my son, so she can have him. She’s the one who’s telling you to do this.” Her voice quivered, morphing from despair to desperation to anger in a matter of seconds.

“You’re sick, you know that?”

She shook her head and took a few steps back. “No one will ever take my son away from me, Ethan.” She reached into her pocket and suddenly, I was staring at the barrel of a Smith & Wesson.

“Darrah, put that away,” Edward pleaded.

“If I can’t have my son and you...neither will she.” She cast a vacant stare upon me as she raised the gun, and Nolan’s face was all I could see. I didn’t come this far only to lose him forever. Then there was Jenna, my other reason for living. If this had been a year ago, I would’ve helped her pull the trigger, but I had so much to live for now.

“Put the gun down, Darrah,” I calmly requested.

“Tell me you still love me,” she demanded.

I shook my head. “I can’t because I don’t.” I couldn’t lie, even with a loaded gun pointed at me. I couldn’t bring myself to say those words to her. Her trembling hand reached for the trigger, and I knew it was now or never. I lunged at her, just as the gun went off with the bullet piercing through my flesh. Warm blood trickled from my shoulder, but I worked through the pain, in a race to retrieve the gun from the ground, only to lose.

She lifted the pistol with unsteady hands as the throbbing in my shoulder worsened. “Do you know how much pain I’m in when you say you don’t love me?” She raised an eyebrow. “Probably a lot more than you’re in right now. Emotional pain is much worse than physical pain. First you tore apart our marriage, and now you want my son, and I can’t let that happen. I have two shots left, one for you and one for me. We’re going to die here together. I control who you’ll love for the rest of your life, and if it’s not going to be me, it will be no one.”

“Drop the gun down, now!” a familiar voice bellowed. My eyes shifted over Darrah’s shoulder to Tom, standing behind her with his gun drawn.

Darrah shook her head, her eyes locking with mine. “I can’t,” she whispered.

“Darrah, put the gun down. This isn’t gonna change anything. If you kill yourself and me, where will that leave Nolan?” I tried my best to reason with her.

The wind kicked up, and a strand of her long, brown hair stretched across her face. “He’s already dead,” she whispered.

My eyes widened, my heart sank, and all sense of reasoning faded away. “You fuckin’ bitch!” I shouted, lunging toward her, no longer worried about my own well-being just as a jolting pain shot through my stomach, knocking me to the ground. My hand clenched my abdomen, oozing with blood, and each breath I took became more labored before falling to the ground.

Jenna stood on the beach with her back toward me, turning around slowly with a beautiful smile etched across her face as I approached her. I needed to feel the safety of her arms. I needed for her to make this better in the way only she could. Her long, wavy hair blew in the warm breeze as she waited for me with outstretched arms—so close, yet so far. No matter how many steps I took, she was still out of reach. The smile on her face faded, and she put down her arms.

“Jenna,” I called when she began to walk away. Longing for her touch, longing to feel her lips on mine—to no avail. “Jenna!” I shouted this time a little louder.

She turned around once again, looking past me.

“I love you, Jenna,” I whispered.

Her deep-brown eyes finally locked with mine as a lone teardrop rolled down her face. “I love you, Ethan,” she whispered back. “I love you so much.”

The pain I was in subsided with just the sound of her voice. The wind picked up and the waves crashed into the shoreline. I closed my eyes, and a welcoming calmness found me as her presence surrounded me, overtaking every part of me. I could breathe once again.

“I love you, Ethan…I love you.”

My face formed a smile hearing those words coming from her lips. Her warm, soft hands caressed my face, and I reveled in her touch, afraid to open my eyes and have her be gone forever.

“Come back, Ethan, please come back,” she begged. “Remember your promise…we’re going to be happy together.” Her lips rested on my forehead. “Please, don’t leave me.”

I fought with everything I had to peel my eyes open. “Jen-Jenna,” I managed to get out.

“Ethan!” she exclaimed.

She could hear me. She could finally hear me. I just needed to open my eyes, so I could see her standing by the water, so much like the first time we’d met.

“Wake up, Ethan. Please wake up,” she begged.

The anchors holding my eyes down were slowly lifted and her beautiful face came into view.

“Ethan!” she shouted.

My vision adjusted to the light, and I took in my surroundings. The sound of the ocean was replaced with the beeping of machines, the desolate beach now four walls of a tiny room. The only thing remaining from that dream was Jenna.

“Where am I?” I asked, barely recognizing my own voice.

“You’re in the hospital. You were shot. You had two surgeries and have been here for two weeks.” Jenna’s voice cracked. “You scared me half to death.” She pressed her cheek into mine, choking back a sob before finally relenting and releasing all her emotions. “I need to get the nurse and tell her you’re awake,” she advised after pulling herself together.

“Wait…don’t go yet.” I closed my eyes and squeezed her hand, reliving those last moments before I wound up in this place. “What happened to…her?” I couldn’t even bring myself to say her name.

“She shot herself…she’s dead, Ethan.”

I nodded, feeling no remorse, the same way I had for my father. “She killed him, Jenna. She really killed him.” My stomach dropped. I would have to mourn the loss of my son all over again.

“What?” She creased her eyebrows in confusion. “Who?”

“Nolan.” My voice faltered at the mention of his name.

“No, Ethan. She didn’t. Nolan is with your sister, and he’s fine.”

“What? She told me—”

“She was lying. He was back at the hotel with his nanny.”

I couldn’t contain my smile.

“He’s alive, Ethan. Your son is alive.”

I outstretched my arms to hug her and flinched in pain.

She rushed to my side and smoothed her hand along the side of my face. “Please take it easy. You’re still going to be in a lot of pain for a while.”

I shook my head and smiled. “No. I’m not in any more pain. I’ve never felt better in my life.”

She looked down and me and flashed a caring smile. “Can I please get the nurse now?”

I couldn’t take my eyes off her. This girl. This angel. She brought my son back into my life and she brought life back to me. I owed her everything.

“Hello, earth to Ethan.” She waved her hand in front of my face.

“Was that part of my dream or did you really say it?” I asked.

“Say what?”

“That you loved me.”

“No, you weren’t dreaming…I love you, Ethan.”

“I was so afraid I’d freaked you out that night I told you. I thought I lost you.”

“You’re not getting rid of me that easily.” She grinned and bent over to kiss my forehead. “I’ll be right back.”

I grabbed her hand and pulled her back. “You’ll be happy…with Nolan and me? The three of us.”

She pulled in her bottom lip, biting back a smile. “I’ll be more than happy.”

“In the past five minutes of waking up, you’ve made me the happiest man alive. I have my son back, and I have the woman I love. Please just come here.”

She walked back to my bed and took a seat, pressing her forehead to mine.

“You make me so happy, Jenna.” I studied her face a little while longer before she lowered her head on my chest, allowing me to wrap my arms around her and bask in the familiar comfort only she could bring. I played with her hair as the bright sunlight poured through the window.

“I was so scared I’d lost you.” Her voice cracked.

“You didn’t lose me. I promise I’m not going anywhere.”

I closed my eyes, wondering if this was all a dream. I didn’t believe in happy endings, but the girl lying next to me did, and she was determined to make me a believer too.