It had been a little over a month since my family had visited. We were eating breakfast when Jacob’s phone rang.
“This is Jacob,” he answered. “I’m good, just eating some breakfast. How are you?”
I couldn’t hear the person on the other end, but Jacob’s face quickly turned serious.
“Right… of course, I understand that. I have been going over some figures the last few weeks, and I think it’s a good idea if we sat down and discussed it.”
I frowned and mouthed, “Everything ok?”
He nodded, the expression on his face not changing. This was lawyer Jacob, the person I hadn’t met yet.
“I’ll have my secretary send over all that information, and as soon as I have things worked out here, I’ll have her send my flight information as well. After that, we can figure out a date for the meeting.”
Flight?
“I’ll also have her cc the partners and we can come up with a date that works for everyone, but the sooner the better, Carl. Yes, you too. Bye.” He hit end and placed his cell phone on the table.
I waited for a few minutes hoping he would share what that was all about, but he didn’t. I even gave him the stare down, thinking he would get the hint to spill it. His silence tore into my insecurities of the past just a little bit. It’s not like I knew what his plans were. I stood up from the table with my plate, more annoyed than anything and went to the kitchen. I didn’t want to ask him what was going on, I just wanted him to tell me. To include me.
Simple as that.
To finally include me in his life without me having to say something or constantly ask. Well, I’ll show him, two can play at that game.
I started to wash the dishes when I felt him come up behind me and wrap his arms around my waist, turning me to face him. He grabbed my chin, making me look at him. Placing his arms on my shoulders, caging me in the only way he could.
“Say it,” he demanded with a shit-eating grin on his face.
I shrugged, not wanting to give him an inch. I knew I was being a child, but I didn’t care. After all we had been through he should just know. It was a given.
“You know, Kid, for someone who says they’re an adult, you sure know how to act like a child sometimes.” He half-laughed.
My eyes widened in shock, playing it up a little. I never wanted to punch him in the face more than I did at that moment for finding the situation funny.
“Do I need to provoke you to get the truth? Is it working?”
I narrowed my eyes at him and he laughed again, shaking his head and kissing my forehead. “It’s been six months since I’ve been here.”
I knew that. I had been counting down the days till he left me again.
“Before I found you, Lily. All I did was work. It was my whole life.”
“What about your manwhore status?” I threw at him.
He pursed his lips, surprised that it had taken me that long to ask him about that.
“Nobody mattered but you. It’s always been you, baby,” he responded, not elaborating any further.
“You always seem to say the right things, Jacob,” I replied, rolling my eyes.
“Are you trying to have an argument right now? Is that what’s going on?”
I scoffed, ducking my head to slide out of his arms. He let me go without a fight.
“You’re being an asshole!” I yelled, walking into the living room.
He followed, leaning against the wall in that Jacob sort of way. I call it his asshole stance. Probably one he uses in the courtroom to intimidate people.
“What?” I shouted, annoyed but also amused that he was treating me like I was on the stand.
“I just wanted to have front row seats to the temper tantrum of a lifetime, Kid, you may proceed.”
“Temper tantrum? That’s what you think this is?” I laughed.
“No. I know that’s what this is.”
“I’m sorry that you still haven’t changed. I’m just supposed to accept it, right?”
He rubbed his fingers back and forth over his mouth, clearly amused with my banter.
“Just go, Jacob, go back home to your lawyer life, I’ll stay here. We will see each other when we can. Maybe have some phone sex, some late night booty on Skype. Okay? I know you have to go back to work, I know you have a life over there, an apartment, a career, I get it alright! You’re old and mature and got your shit together. It sure as hell doesn’t mean I have to fucking like it.”
“I see,” he replied, trying so hard not to smile.
I put my hands up in the air in front of me. “That’s all you have to say? I see?”
He pushed off the wall and headed to my bedroom. I watched him walk away and I was about to follow and give him hell, but he came back before I had the chance. He sat on the armchair, hunched over with his elbows on his knees, a piece of paper hanging in his hands.
“You know, Kid, if you want to start bringing up the past every time you overhear something you don’t like, then the longevity of our lives together will most definitely be rough. You know I like it rough, baby, but I for one don’t want to live like that. Do you?”
I didn’t say anything. What could I say to that?
“Okay, that’s how you want to play it? Giving me the silent treatment.” He nodded, understanding. “Since you’re so quick at throwing the past in my face every chance you get, I would like to discuss the past as well. As in the last six months,” he stated.
“I came here to find you. I pursued you. I wouldn’t take no for an answer. I bulldozed my way back into your life. I told you I love you… Do you see a pattern, Lillian? Because all the facts point to yes.”
I still didn’t say anything, mostly because he was right, and that irritated me as much as it made me happy.
He laid the sheet of paper he’d been holding on the coffee table. It was then that I noticed it was an airline ticket.
“You booked your flight back already? And you haven’t even told me! This is exactly what I’m talking about! You don’t include me in anything. Nothing has changed between us except NOW you tell me you love me!”
He cocked his head to the side. “Is that all I do now?” he arrogantly replied.
“No!” I shook my head. “You do not get to turn this conversation into a way to get laid! I’m closed up, buddy!”
He leaned back in the chair, laughing. “Check the ticket, Lillian.”
“Why? Are you leaving this afternoon, big man?”
“With the way you’re acting I just might. Stop being a little shit and check the fucking ticket, Lillian,” he repeated.
I snatched the paper off the table, rolling my eyes at him. Looking at the name.
Lillian Ryder.
I almost died right then and there.
Wanting to eat my words.
“Do you like what you see, Kid?” I had to laugh at her.
She bit her lip with embarrassment radiating all around her.
“Lily, you already know how I feel about you. I’ve proved it to you then, in my own fucked up way, as much as I do now. Except now I use words to match my actions. You know that I'm committed to us, why question that? I finally have you. I don’t want to lose you. Up until this point, this time around, it’s been all me. I know you love me, but I need it to be your choice. We haven’t spoken about the future. I want to keep it that way until you see how I’ve lived all these years. I think it will help clear up a lot of those goddamn insecurities you have. Come back with me. You need to see.”
“To California?”
“I believe I made you a promise.”
“Oh, so the first time I went there didn’t count?”
He raised an eyebrow in a playful way.
“For how long?” I hesitated. “I mean this isn’t me moving there, right?”
He grinned. “California couldn’t handle you, Kid. It’s for a few weeks while I take care of some business.”
“Are you going to come back with me?”
“When I have more information for you, we will talk about it. For now, I want you to come with me. I won’t take no for an answer.”
“For only a second, I thought you were leaving me again. I never expected this,” she expressed with glossy eyes.
I stood right in front of her, all joking aside, needing her to see how serious I was about the situation. “I'm giving you a choice, I can't force you to be with me. But, Lily, choose me again. Choose us,” he pointed between us. “I promise I won’t ever walk away from you, from us again. I promise to give you all of me, forever." I kissed all along her face, tears falling down her cheeks.
“I’m all in, sweet girl, damn the fucking consequences.”
“I’m scared, Jacob. I know I’ve always been strong when it comes to us, but Lucas has been through the same shit I have. I don’t want to lose my brother. I can’t lose him.”
“I would never let that happen, Kid.”
“That doesn’t mean it’s not going to, you know my brother as well as I do.”
“He’s going to be pissed off at me. Not you. It will be my ass that he will want to lay out.”
“Maybe… but I don’t want you to lose him either. I don’t want to come between anyone.”
“I know, baby. The last thing I want is for you to have to go through any more shit.”
“How are we going to tell them? How is this going to go down?”
I sighed not knowing the answer. “Let’s worry about us for now. We can worry about everyone else later.”
“Okay.”
“Are you coming back with me?”
She grinned, nodding. “I need to tell my work.”
“Not necessary.”
She laughed. “I have to tell them I’m leaving, Jacob.”
“It’s already handled, sweet girl. I took care of everything.”
She gasped, surprised. “I thought this was my choice.”
I smiled. “Come on. Who are you talking to here? I gave you the option, doesn’t mean I wasn’t going to throw you over my shoulder and take you with me.”
“That would have been quite a scene through security.”
“Private planes exist for a reason.” He grinned.
“You have all the answers, don’t you?”
“It’s part of my charm.”
“Charm or annoyance?”
He slapped my ass making me yelp.
“Do I need to remind you who’s in charge here?”
She backed away from me. “I know who’s in charge.”
“Good girl.”
“Me,” she giggled and took off running.
I spent the rest of the morning reminding her just how wrong she was.