Beck’s hands were fisted in his hair as he paced in a tight circle, murmuring to himself as the girl disappeared into the night.
“Who was that?” I demanded once she was out of earshot.
He looked up at me, his stare expectant. “Jessica.”
“Heard you the first time. Who is she and why’s she trying to give product back?”
“What do you mean ‘who is she,’ man?” His hands slid from his head to fall limply at his sides and a lame huff punched from his chest.
I lifted a brow.
Beck flung out an arm, gesturing off toward the direction she’d left. “She’s the girl I waited for. She’s the girl I’ve attempted to hide from the shit life we run, just how you tried to hide Lil.”
My teeth gnashed and hands twitched toward one of my blades at her name, but I calmed myself with a stuttered breath.
“But as you probably heard, she made it clear a long fucking time ago she wanted nothing to do with me. And now the last thing I want is anything to do with her.”
“And the product?”
Another huff. “Jess thinks I’m the reason her mom is going to kill herself one day.” He drummed his fingers anxiously on his jeans then murmured to himself, “She’d already be dead if it weren’t for me.”
“Mixing your lives isn’t something you want to do, Beck. What happens when her mom steals from you? When Jessica steals from you?”
“Didn’t you hear me?” he asked. “We want nothing to do with each other. You’d know this if you’d paid attention to anything in the last few years.” A rough laugh burst from his chest. “Shit, you probably would’ve caught her and tried to kill her long before tonight if you didn’t have such a one-track mind.”
My lip curled, but his words stopped me before a retort could leave my tongue. “Catch her where?”
Beck’s eyes hardened in a way I’d learned well throughout our lives. It was the look he wore when he knew something he didn’t want to tell me, but couldn’t keep from me.
He’d slanted that glare at me a lot when it had come to Lily.
But he was too loyal to me to keep her secrets.
His loyalty was probably another thing that had pushed her from us.
With a weighted breath, he said, “You can sneak up on any person in the world without them ever knowing you’re there, Kieran. But you couldn’t sneak up on Jess. I didn’t tell her you were coming. I was just trying to get her to leave.”
My fingers moved restlessly as I fought the urge to grab a knife—to be comforted by its familiar weight.
Because Beck was wrong.
There was one other person I hadn’t been able to sneak up on. Not for years.
Lily had learned to feel the way the energy in the room shifted when I was in it.
“Shit,” Beck continued. “I’d bet my life that Jess could hear you before you ever slid up on her, just like I’d bet my life that she’d be the one person to get the slip on you. Because she’s been doing it for years.”
My brows rose.
“She’s been slipping in and out of Holloway for about a decade. Sometimes I see her, sometimes I don’t. The only times I do are if she wants me to. No one sees her unless she wants them to. She’s even made it into meetings.”
Shock and doubt pulsed through me, stunning me for a few seconds as I tried to make what Beck was saying true in my mind. “Not possible.”
Beck barked out a frustrated laugh and gave a quick jerk of a nod. “Should be impossible. But there have been more than a few times that I’d go back to my room directly following a meeting, and she’d be waiting in there to talk to me about what she heard in the meeting.” He ran a hand through his hair and shrugged. “She’d be seen if she listened at the doors or windows. The best I’ve come up with is the vents.”
“Why didn’t you tell me before now? She could’ve recorded and leaked meetings. She could’ve stolen . . .” I turned my head to look in the direction she’d gone and hissed a curse.
“That’s not her way. Jessica doesn’t steal or take things to law enforcement. She uses knowledge against you.”
I finally reached for one of the smaller blades on my belt, quickly flipping it in the air again and again as I tried to figure out how to tell Beck what I knew.
“For Mickey?”
Beck’s eyes widened with horror. “Mickey? Hell no. She pulled a knife on me when she found out about the trafficking ring because I was still working for him.”
I tilted my head in a nod. With a hard breath through my nose, I caught the knife and gripped it in my hand. “Mickey’s back, Beck. And it’s not good.” I rubbed my fisted hand over my jaw, forcing myself to just say it.
To not feel.
But this was Beck.
And this was Conor.
“I think Mickey knows it was us . . . or, at least, me.”
“Jesus fuck.”
“He’s sure someone in Holloway betrayed him and is positive it wasn’t Bailey and Finn. Said there’s no way the Borellos could’ve known all they did without help from our end. That’s why he stayed away these last weeks since he got out. He said he had everyone watched during that time.”
Beck visibly stilled. “Tell me it was you watching us,” he pleaded.
My expression was answer enough, because Beck hissed a curse and dragged his hands through his hair again.
“Tommy?” I murmured, waiting until I had his attention to continue. “He didn’t skip out. He never had the chance. Mickey had him killed because he thought Tommy was going to.”
“The fuck? Tommy worshipped him more than any of the others.”
“He’s losing it,” I said in agreement. “He’s unpredictable right now. I’m worried about his next move if this is what he’s already done.”
“You said you think he knows,” Beck said, the unspoken question lingering in the air.
I forced myself to hold his stare. “He has to know. He’s only back now because he’s untouchable.”
“Fuck no, he’s not,” Beck bit out. “Slit his goddamn throat and let’s finish this, or I’ll see you in hell . . . yeah?” When I didn’t respond, unease crept over Beck’s face. “Are we not seeing each other in hell?”
“Beck . . . he’s got a safeguard. If he dies, there’re orders for someone to be taken out immediately. And I’m not the silencer, so I can’t stop it.”
Beck’s gaze darted over my stance, lingering on my shaking fists for a few seconds before moving back to my face. “Who?”
I clenched my jaw for a few seconds then breathed out, “Conor.”