CHAPTER 4
Madeline
I woke up early and ran to the gym before work, feeling inspired by the night before. Declan wasn’t there, and I looked down at the outfit that I’d matched today and laughed to myself. It was still healthy to be here, right? I did a little longer on one of the elliptical machines and a few weights before running home to shower. I braided my hair in a loose plait over my shoulder and lined my eyes with a molten gray liner before adding a layer of mascara. I told myself that this wasn’t for Declan as I searched my drawer for something for my lips, settling on a pink lipstick. I rarely wore makeup to work since I would sweat it off running around, but it was good to try for the patients. A happy nurse that looked put together made for content patients. That is what I was going to tell myself.
I pulled on my dark pink scrubs and a pair of sneakers that would support my feet for the long day ahead of me. I locked my door and walked to my car as I looked at the bright sun in the sky while locking my door. I’d eaten a plate of eggs and bacon before leaving and shoved some snacks in my purse to grab when I had some free time. I could grab dinner in the cafeteria if I had time, but that was rare on most nights.
I walked in and locked up my stuff, clocked in at the main desk and glanced around to see what needed to be done. I was here long enough to recognize people but not know all the names and I searched for people I’d talked to the most. I was curious about Declan, but I didn’t want to appear nosy. It needed to be casual if possible.
Was that even possible?
I saw Lily typing something into the computer and headed her way to offer my help. I liked to know what was happening when I got here, so I always made a point of asking. “Hi, Lily. Is there anything that I need to do right away?” I asked as she glanced at me with a smile on her freckled face.
“Enjoy the peace for a minute. You never know what will happen around this place,” Lily winked at me as I laughed softly. She was right. I went to a computer and read what was going on, also checking on Suzie. She was still here under observation, and I considered getting her a little stuffed animal from the gift shop to drop off on a break. She’d like that, wouldn’t she?
Maybe it was too much for an ER nurse to do. I didn’t think that the little girl remembered me from last night with all that she’d been through. I glanced at Lily, wondering if I should ask her when a voice came over the radio. “Here we go,” Lily said as she grabbed it. There was a multi-vehicle car accident nearby, and the ambulances were headed our way. I took a deep breath and walked out with Lily to where they would be arriving to see what we were in for. I think that I saw more shootings and accidents than anything else, so I was well versed with them now.
We were finishing, and I took a drink of water before I headed back to the main desk. People came in one after the other, and I was surprised when I realized that four hours had passed. Lily told me to get some fresh air, and I walked outside, leaning against the wall as I took the night in. There was a lot of activity out here with cars and ambulances parked wildly, and I took a slow, deep breath. Between the ambulances and the walk-ins, I was exhausted.
“Madeline,” said a male voice as I blinked and looked up to see Declan walking towards me.
“Hi. What are you doing out here?” I asked as he smiled.
“I make a point of getting fresh air as much as I can. I am in this particular spot because I just did a consult in your area.” He stopped in front of me and stared down at me as his eyes searched my face. “How is your night?”
“Busy, but I chose the ER in part for that reason. I am used to keeping myself occupied,” I admitted, knowing that it was true. Even as a kid, I was always busy, and my aunt and mother teased me for it. I suspected that it had to do with my dad leaving even without a long history to remember him by. I was drawn towards men that I met along the way like teachers, finding wisdom in them. I liked older guys when I was at the dating age, and I blushed at the thought. Here I was again.
“I picked surgery because that is what my father did,” Declan murmured as I smiled at him.
“My mom is still a nurse to this day. I guess the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, does it?” I asked as he laughed with me. The heat between us was evident in the cool air around us, making me heat up rapidly as I struggled to take a breath.
“No, it would seem not. What time does your shift end?” Declan asked as I widened my eyes.
“Not until three in the morning,” I replied as disappointment flashed across his face.
“Too bad. I am working until eight,” Declan said as I felt what I’d seen in his eyes flood my body. Disappointment. What was wrong with me? Men didn’t get to me like this.
“Yeah,” I breathed as he looked around and then glanced down at my lips. My pager buzzed, and I jumped violently before looking down at it. “I have to go back in.”
“I’ll be at the gym after I get off, somewhere around nine,” he told me as I looked up and met his heated gaze.
“Maybe I’ll see you there,” I replied before I pushed away from the wall and stood closer to him.
The kisses that I’d shared with men before now played through my mind as I walked back to the ER and was directed to a room with a sick little boy. Unfortunately, I recognized his symptoms as the flu that was going around and told the doctor that came in what I was thinking. She read over the charts and nodded at me with a wink before turning to the little boy.
I thought about the fact that I’d never slept with a man. I’d dated and come close, but I feared that final step. I knew that it would hurt and wanted it to be special, as well as experience it with someone that made me really want it. It felt silly being my age and a virgin, but I just didn’t readily admit it to anyone. I didn’t reveal a lot to anyone, staying introverted and keeping to myself most of the time.
Kelly came in later that night, and I watched as she and Lily laughed over something on the computer. They were close, and I hadn’t been that way with a lot of people in my life. I was close to Mom and Shelly and a few individuals in college, but we all ended up at different jobs. That was how life was, and I considered the idea that I was ready for a close friend and maybe a man in my life. Well, not just any man.
I did manage to grab a soft, pink teddy bear from the gift shop and passed Declan as I headed to Suzie’s room. He looked at the bear and then into my face as I smiled at him, turning the corner to peer into her room. Her aunt was sitting with her, and I stepped quietly so I wouldn’t scare her. “Oh. Hi,” she said as she rubbed her eyes, the circles dark and prominent underneath them. She looked at the bear with surprise in her weary eyes and smiled gently. Suzie was sleeping so she wouldn’t know who gave it to her, but I smiled at her aunt.
“Can you give this to her for me? I thought that it might brighten her day some.” I handed her the bear, and she looked at it with wonder before meeting my eyes.
“Yes, of course. This is so sweet. Thank you.” She stood to hug me, catching me off guard as her arms wrapped tightly around me. She cried a little, and I stilled before embracing her in return. “She’s coming home with me in two days. My family is moving her stuff over to the apartment now, so everything will be ready for her.”
“That’s great,” I told her as we parted, and she sighed.
“I still have no idea what I am doing, but she trusted me. I have to try.” The woman wiped tears from her eyes, and I smiled and nodded. When I turned to leave, I saw Declan leaning against the counter across from the room, watching everything with a soft expression on his face.