CHAPTER 5
Declan
Madeline came out with a shy expression on her face. “Was she a patient of yours before this?” I asked her as she licked her pink lips and nodded. “That was kind of you.”
“She lost her mom to a drunk driver. Her aunt is taking care of her now and I just…felt bad. I wanted to do something nice,” Madeline replied as she shrugged helplessly. “Is that too much?”
“No. It’s nice to see,” I assured Madeline as she met my eyes and nodded. “They’ll remember you, Madeline.”
“I hope so,” she said as she glanced towards the ER. “I should get back.”
I looked at her for a long moment as I struggled with my feelings. Madeline was sweet, but she made me hard as a fucking rock at the same time, and it was mixing me up inside. “Meet me at the gym, if you’re awake. We can get breakfast after.”
“I will try to be there around eight thirty,” she told me before slinking off to head back to work. I saw a doctor walk by as she left and give me a curious look. Of course, it had to be one of the ones that hit on me first and had the biggest mouth in the hospital.
Great. Madeline was going to be a part of the rumor mill before anything even happened. I turned to go prepare for a brain surgery, going into my focused mood for the procedure that had nothing to do with the drama in the building. I remembered my father telling me that all that mattered was the patient and their well-being. That was my job, and they depended on me for that. I walked into the room and glanced at the staff helping me, noticing a few new faces watching from the window as I took a deep breath.
This was just a young woman that had a tumor. This surgery could save her and rid her of cancer, with all hopes that it wouldn’t return. I thought about all the doctors that did this without feeling and respect, and the image of Madeline carrying that bear in her hands came to mind as I smiled. She had a strong feeling for her work, and it drew me closer to her.
Focus, Declan. Save it for any other time than here
. I got back into the moment and completed the long surgery before I left the room. I washed up and looked at the clock to see that I was an hour shy of being finished. I let out a long sigh and went to get some water as some of the doctors observing stepped over to congratulate me on a smooth surgery. I thanked them and got my drink before I went to speak to the family and assure them that everything went well.
I clocked out and changed into my clothes for the gym before leaving. My bottle of water was in the car, and I took a long sip before driving to the gym, just wanting Madeline to be there. I wanted to get to know her since she was one of the only people I had truly connected with at the hospital through my sense of compassion. I parked in the lot of the gym and went inside, going to find a treadmill for a run to release the day from my body. The exercise was as much therapy as it was for my physical health. It was a way to wear myself out and wind down in some odd way. Walking into the gym, I noted that it wasn’t too crowded as I looked over the cardio room to see if I could be next to Madeline.
If she showed up.
I picked one in the corner of the room that was a bit more private. I wanted to be able to talk to Madeline today. I wanted to know what was in those pretty eyes of hers and why she was so kind. Being a nurse was about caring for others, but they didn’t all take it to the level that Madeline did. They all didn’t bring bears that they bought to patients that had left the area of the hospital that they worked in.
It was something that I’d done a time or two when patients really got under my skin. It was something that Laura had done for clients when she was still alive, and before that, I’d never met anybody with that quality about them. I felt like I needed to hold onto it with Madeline somehow despite that feeling that it was wrong, or perhaps too soon.
The medical industry was a money maker for a lot of people. Some kids went to college for all that time to make the salary, even if a lot of it went to student loans. They felt like they were important to the world and that they were sometimes better than everyone else because of their job. It was bullshit. My father loved his job, and I do as well. I met a lot of people that were impressed with the title and the money, but for me, it was a job that was in my heart.
I sounded like a sappy teenager instead of an older man. I got the treadmill going and started to run, waking up my senses for a bit and giving me a surge of adrenaline. I held back on looking around too much to see if she was arriving but glanced rapidly over when someone stepped onto the treadmill beside me. Blonde hair greeted me, and those green eyes that haunted my mind ever since she’d bumped into me shone as she smiled at me. “Hey,” Madeline greeted me as she set her bottle in its place and turned on the machine. “How was the rest of your shift?”
“I did a brain surgery. It went well but it was long,” I admitted as I shook my head. “Yours?”
“Madness. I wonder if I made the right choice sometimes,” Madeline said as I looked closely at her. “I’m kidding. I love it, but I am still relatively new there. I’m finding my way.”
“It takes time, but from what I’ve seen, I think you’re doing great. You have a warmth about you,” I assured Madeline as she blushed.
“My mother always did as well. Everyone loved her, and I want to be like her…she’s like a celebrity or something.” Madeline looked beautiful as she spoke, and her eyes were full of awe. It made me smile.
“You are not your mother, Madeline. It’s wonderful that you love her so much but be yourself as well. You are a kind, compassionate woman.” Her eyes widened as she looked at me and I felt heat wash between my legs as my cock twitched in my pants. Down, boy. Not yet.
“I am?” She asked as I frowned. What made her not see that about herself? Who had hurt her in the past?
“Yes,” I assured her as I decided to move the topic to a lighter one. It didn’t feel right discussing this in such a public place, so we started discussing what our favorite were about this gym. She seemed to be here for the same reasons that I was overall, even though I noticed that her shirt was a little loose fitting. Perhaps she thought she needed to lose a little weight or something, which was ridiculous. Madeline had curves that were beautiful, sexy.
After the workout, I looked at her. “Would you like to have breakfast with me?” We were both a bit sweaty, but it was cool outside, and the breeze would even us both out. “Did you sleep enough to stay up a little while?”
“I dozed. I'm all right, and I’d like that,” Madeline told me as her familiar blush warmed her cheeks. We talked about it as we walked outside, and I invited her over to my house. It felt so empty a lot of the time, and I had plenty of stuff to cook there. We could talk without anyone listening to us. “Are you sure?” Madeline asked as I nodded. “Is there anything that I can bring over?”
“If you like eggs, fruit and bacon I am all set. I even have the stuff to make crepes or toast,” I boasted as she laughed.
“Perfect then,” she agreed as she looked into my eyes. “Can I see your phone?” I handed it to her, and she did something with it before handing it over. “I’ve sent myself a text, so you have my number and can tell me your address and anything else that I need to know. It’s gated, isn’t it?”
“Yes,” I replied as I pulled up the message and sent what she needed. “I’ll see you soon.”
We walked to our cars that were parked as row apart, and I headed home to pick up a bit. There was a good chance that Madeline might go home and change out of her gym clothes, but she said that she lived close by. It wouldn’t be long. We didn’t work until tonight, so if we got a little sleep, we’d both be fine. I was used to broken sleep since Laura had gotten ill anyway, so having it due to the company of a beautiful woman pleased me. I drove to the house and parked in the garage before heading in to wipe down the kitchen. I had a cleaner come in every couple of weeks as it was, so I was just tidying up. Looking around, I realized how much of Laura was in this room; in this house. Was it horrible for me to have invited another woman here?
No. Laura wanted me to move on, just like I would’ve encouraged her to do it I had passed away first. That was always our agreement, and I looked out of the window as I remembered the conversation. While we were madly in love from the start, Laura was realistic about life. We were in bed one night about a year into dating, sweaty and sloppy and she looked at me with those bright blue eyes of hers. “If anything, ever happens to me, I don’t want you to stop living.”
“Is there something that you’re hiding from me?” I’d teased her as I pulled her close, never imagining in that moment that I’d ever be with someone else.
“No, but I think you are an amazing man, and I want you to always have love in your life,” she’s responded before kissing me. She was finishing law school, and I was nearly done with medical school, and the future was looking bright for both of us.
“I feel the same way,” I’d murmured before kissing her again, pushing the words away as it deepened quickly. She told me the same words when she knew that the cancer was terminal, and I’d cried for weeks afterward. It was real now. She was going to leave me, and I would be alone.