CHAPTER 21
Madeline
It was great seeing my mom and aunt again. I walked from the gate and joined the crowd in walking towards waiting loved ones, feeling a bit down. It seemed like time flew by before I was leaving for this visit and Declan’s parents were arriving for theirs. We were having a lot of sex, but beyond that it felt like he might be pulling away from me. Maybe I was overthinking it.
I smiled as I looked ahead and saw the two people that I loved the most staring towards me. I let the crowd disperse into different directions as Mom hurried forward to wrap me in a hug. It felt so good and I realized how much I missed her. I moved to my aunt and gave her a big hug before they got on either side of me and took my arms.
“So, how is it at the hospital?” Mom asked as we walked to get my bag.
“Busy. There’s been some crazy nights there. I’m shocked they gave me this time off at all.” I smiled as I looked ahead to see my bright blue suitcase mixed among the plain ones. Mom gave it to me when I moved, making me promise to visit her as much as I could. We grabbed it and walked out to the SUV that Mom got right after I left, and I gazed at the ten-year-old car with a laugh. “Mom. You’re a nurse and this is your car?”
“We have an apartment in Brooklyn. That doesn’t come cheap. I imagine you pay a lot as well,” Mom told me as she opened the door with a key. I slipped into the back seat once my bag was inside, brushing off their insistence that I sit up front. Shelly asked if I wanted to get pizza, knowing how much I loved it in New York. I agreed, since Chicago didn’t quite cut it for me. We went to a small place near their artist loft and gathered around the table as they ordered a pitcher of beer. I asked for a soda, not ready to drink yet. We asked for an extra-large veggie pizza and Mom looked closely at me. “So, how are you?”
“I’m good, Mom.” She narrowed her pretty eyes at me and reached out to tuck my hair behind my ear.
“You look different. Are you seeing someone now?” Mom asked as I blushed, making her smile. “I knew it.”
“I’m seeing a doctor. It isn’t serious, Mom.” I tried to smile but she looked closer at me.
“Isn’t it?” She asked as Shelly took a good look at me.
“Oh my God. Mom, just stop this,” I told her as I reached for my soda, reconsidering the choice not to drink the beer. I took a long sip and tried to force the heat washing over my skin away.
“Hmmm. We’ll talk later after some wine,” Mom assured me as I sighed heavily. We moved onto talking about the city and everything that was going on there, making me miss it. Mom packed the remaining slices of pizza into a box and I drove us to the loft, since Mom and Shelly drank a lot of beer. We parked on the street and I looked up and down, taking in the creative vibe as we got out to get my bag. Once they unlocked the door, I looked around the new apartment. It wasn’t huge, but it had space for the both with corners of the room sectioned off to make bedrooms with the center space for working on their art.
“I love it,” I told them as I looked around. I didn’t know where I was going to sleep, but I assumed with Mom. She loved talking late into the night and I asked her which room was here. When she pointed to the one furthest away, I carried my bag over there. I wondered how they kept their lives private here, knowing that I could never live with anyone and be sleeping with Declan.
Declan.
I wanted to show him Brooklyn. I wanted to take him for coffee and food and just wander around. I closed my eyes for a moment before walking over to the window to look over the lights of the city. It was beautiful, but I missed him. “Want some wine?” Shelly asked as I turned and nodded. I walked over to the kitchen where wine was poured into big glasses and we walked over to the couch and snuggled together, turning on a movie.
We chatted about my childhood and the memories that I cherished. I drank another glass of wine and we ate more pizza before Shelly told us that she must get to bed. She went to rinse her glass and I smiled at Mom as I hugged her again. “You look a little happier now. Want to talk?”
We rinsed our glasses and went to the other corner to climb into Mom’s big bed. I was wearing a big shirt and some old leggings and snuggled under the blanket as I smiled. “So, you remember the doctor that I mentioned?”
“I do,” Mom replied as I took a deep breath. She waited in silence as I considered what to say to her.
“It’s gotten… something. We’ve seen each other a lot and I’m sleeping with him, Mom.” I felt her pull me against her as she sighed.
“Was that the right choice for you?” Her voice was soft, and I raised my eyebrows thoughtfully.
“I think so. It’s complicated, Mom. He’s a widower. He lost his wife to cancer a few months ago and we got to talking. Then we were fooling around, and I slept with him. It’s exciting, Mom. It’s better than I ever expected but I don’t think that it’s forever. “I felt adrenaline rush through me as I looked at her.
“It isn’t always meant to be. How is he since he lost his wife?” Mom asked as I considered my answer.
“From what he’s told me, they were both busy with work. They didn’t spend a lot of time together. I know that he loved her and clearly misses her, but I don’t think that he was happy.” I spoke slowly, playing back the time that we’d spent together. I remembered bits and pieces of what he told me. “He took me to this diner out of the city. He’s a doctor and rich… you should see his house. He took me to this tiny where this waitress knew him. It surprised me because he said she’d never go with him.” I felt her stroke my hair and smiled.
“That sounds like he’s opening up to you a bit,” Mom told me as I shrugged.
“I don’t know.” I closed my eyes and settled into the pile of pillows that she loved. I was tired now and missing being in Declan’s arms. Mom told me to get some sleep and I nodded as I snuggled deeper under the blankets. I dreamed about Declan as I slept, feeling him inside of me from every angle before I opened my eyes to see the dim light of dawn through the windows. I breathed in slowly and closed my eyes to go back to sleep.
I woke up several times, deciding to make some coffee and take in the morning light. I grabbed my phone from my purse and charged it in the kitchen as I quietly fixed my cup of coffee with the new single cup maker that Mom had. It was a little noisy, but I managed to not wake anyone up before I walked over to the couch. I curled up and looked at my phone across the room, aware of the fact that he hadn’t tried to contact me.
Was he thinking about me?