Elena didn’t want her parents to think she couldn’t manage work on the farm, so she dragged herself stubbornly from the bed that morning. She had noticed her mother’s curious stares and faked a smile even though the bacon frying in the pan made her queasy. But she couldn’t let on that she wasn’t feeling well. The last thing she needed was her trekking to the castle and making a scene. She didn’t need the unnecessary attention. Besides, she could take care of the baby on her own. What she would tell the child as he or she grew older and asked? She decided she would handle it if it ever came up, but she had some time before that would happen.

She had done most of her morning chores, fetched the eggs, cleaned the sty, fed the horses, so she headed back to the barn to refill the hay. It was running low again, and she needed to tell her dad to order more. But money was also running low, and they needed an alternate source of funding other than selling crops from the farm. She was actively thinking about giving riding lessons or renting out the horses when a wave of nausea overcame her.

She staggered and rested against a stall inside the barn, closing her eyes as she waited for the feeling to pass. She did some deep breathing and placed her hands on her stomach.

“Easy, little one,” she whispered. “Take it easy on Mommy.”

After a few seconds, the rippling movements in her stomach stopped, and she started to feel semi normal again, under the circumstances.

“Elena!” Nathan called from outside.

She mustered the strength to answer. “Hey, Nate.”

“What are you doing?” he asked as he charged into the barn and crashed into her.

“Ow!” she cried, and he stopped dead in his tracks with a perplexed look on his face. “Oh, it’s okay.” She grinned and ruffled his hair. His original smile slowly returned. “I was about to feed the horses some lumps of sugar. You want to do it?”

“Yeah!” he cried excitedly.

She took his hand and led him to the bag. “Okay, here we go.” She handed him a few lumps and pointed him to the first stall with the most docile mare. The animal whinnied and came to the front of the stall as soon as it spotted Elena. Or smelled the sugar, was a better guess.

Nathan laughed when the animal’s tongue tickled his palm as it licked the sugar from him. Elena did the same, forgetting the discomfort she had felt only moments ago. By the time they were through, she felt flushed again. Sweat beads popped up on her forehead and on her nose, and she felt exceedingly hot. She started fanning her face with her hand, but that didn’t soothe her.

“Are you hot?” Nathan cocked his head to the side and asked her. “I could get you some water.”

“Oh, that would be great, Nate,” she said dotingly. “I’d love that.”

He smiled broadly and dashed from the barn. He was barely out of sight before Elena tumbled over to the bale of hay where she and Jason had made love. She wasn’t in any state to reminisce as she tried to block the sickly feelings that swarmed her. She leaned back and held her head upwards, breathing hard and praying for relief. None came.

Nathan returned shortly with the water, and she gulped it down like it was her first in days. She wiped her hand across her mouth and set the glass on the ground. Nathan walked around the barn, kicking loose hay on the floor and teasing the horses. He distracted her for a few minutes, but she couldn’t sit there for the remainder of the day. It would be better if she did something. Maybe that would make the bad feelings go away for good.

She struggled to stand and wobbled as she walked. “Come on, Nate. You need to go back inside. I’m going to round up the chicks.”

“Can I help?”

“You never help.” She laughed. “You end up scaring them so much they run all over the place and make it harder for me.”

“Pleaaseee!” he begged and gave her his most innocent and angelic face.

“I’m sorry, but I really can’t handle that today. Sorry.” She pouted to match his and ruffled his hair. “Maybe when this baby isn’t being such a troublemaker I’ll let you help me. How about that?”

He hung his head and his shoulders drooped. “Okay,” he mumbled, after which he turned his face upwards and looked directly into her eyes. “Promise to let me do it after the baby is born?”

“I promise,” Elena replied and held her promissory fingers in the air.

Nathan was walking away when he stopped like he had remembered something and looked back. “When will the baby be born?”

“In a couple of months,” she told him.

“I hope it’s a boy,” he said and ran to the house.

Elena was moved by his innocent request. She hadn’t given any thought to what gender she preferred. She had assumed originally that Jason would love a son, as all men did. She had flirted with the idea of a little girl who would look like a miniature version of herself. But those were merely flirtations and daydreaming. She didn’t really care, nor had she thought for too long about anything other than the fact that she would be raising this child, boy or girl, alone.

After Nathan had disappeared inside the house, she returned to the barn. For some unknown, strange reason, she loved being there. It was her safe haven, much like the oak tree, so she returned there to center herself.

Inside the house, she would encounter her parents, who would either fuss too much, ask too many questions, or glower at her like she was stupid and being irrational about her pregnancy. Maybe she was, but whatever mistakes she made were hers to make. She was beginning to get upset the longer she thought about it, and she tried to get to the bale of hay to relax herself. She was only halfway there when the horses, as if sensing something was wrong, started whinnying and thumping the ground with their hooves. One of them reared its head and lifted its body into the air, its front hooves landing on the top of the stall door.

“What’s wrong with you?” Elena asked as she looked around in wonderment.

She had barely asked the question when her head felt like it was ballooning, and she clamped her palms against her temples. She was dizzy, and she staggered and bumped into one of the stalls. The animals were in a frenzy, neighing and kicking the stalls as she spun and tried to make her way to the door. Maybe if she could get outside, someone would see her. She didn’t know what was happening and she was frightened.

She closed her eyes against the sickening feeling swelling inside her, and when she opened them again, everything was a blur. Panic swelled in her as she held her arms in front of her, feeling her way outside. She felt like every step she took was taking her nowhere, and her heart thundered in her chest and roared in her ears. She clawed at air and continued to move, but the fog that had descended upon her thickened and she felt like she was suffocating. She lost her footing, and with nothing to hold onto, she collapsed to the ground. Hard. She felt her body jerk, like it didn’t belong to her, and felt a searing pain rip along her right side. She opened her mouth to scream but nothing came out. Her head swam, and she pawed at the loose hay on the ground before her eyes grew heavy and darkness surrounded her.