Chapter Thirty-Eight
BETHANY
It had been a week since we all went to the theme park. I was hoarse for a few days after they forced me to get on the scariest rides at the park. It was amazing though because before that day, I never would’ve imagined that I’d ride any of those roller coasters and honestly, if I was with anyone else, I don’t believe I would have. I was comfortable with Gavin though. The way he made me feel as though everything was going to be alright was enough for me. There were a few times on the rides when I closed my eyes like he suggested. I imagined us being married down the line with a couple children of our own. Vinny was the best big brother to his siblings, and my life was picture perfect. That was just a dream though. Something that was fed into my imagination from all the books I read.
I convinced myself that Gavin was not looking for rings so he could propose to me. Maybe he just considered me to be a girlfriend, and that’s it. Maybe I wasn’t wife potential to him. I hoped that wasn’t the case, but either way, I had to prepare as if I wasn’t going to be his wife. Up until now, my life had never gone the way I wanted it to go, so it wouldn’t make sense for it to happen now. I was just going to enjoy the ride for the time being. I laid in the bed next to Gavin. Ever since I started working at his office, I’d been spending more time over there. I felt like I was setting myself up for failure though because the only time I felt we would be together for good was in my imagination. As much as I wanted to break away from him and stop the heartbreak before it happened, I couldn’t.
Suddenly, Gavin opened his eyes as I laid next to him. “Good morning,” he said, facing me.
“Good morning, babe.”
“How long have you been up just looking around like a creep?”
I laughed. “Just for a little while. Actually, you woke me up with your snoring. Sheesh. You are lucky I didn’t put a sock in your mouth.”
“Really? Man, my stuffy nose must’ve gotten the best of me. I haven’t been the same since we went to the amusement park last week. I think I caught something.”
“Yeah, with all that screaming you did, I would be surprised if you didn’t.”
He chuckled. “Me? Please. I believe you were the one screaming before we even got to the first hills. As a matter of fact,” he reached for his phone and scrolled through until he landed on a video. “Remember this?”
After he pressed play, my screams immediately pierced the silence in the room. “Babe! I told you to delete that!” I said, reaching for his phone. He playfully kept it away from me as my piercing screams continued like a bad dream. “Babe! Okay, okay! I take it back; I was the one screaming! It was me, now please, turn it off!”
He laughed and right before he shut it off, we heard Mike’s voice in the background. “Jesus, woman! We haven’t even gone down the dip yet! Shut your trap!” Gavin laughed on the recorder. “No, you shut up, Mike!” I snapped back just as Gavin shut off his phone.
“Mike gets on my nerves,” I said, folding my arms over my chest. “His friend was cute though, and she was really nice, but I could tell that the two of them were meant for each other.”
“Why is that?”
“Because she curses like a sailor and drinks like a fish.”
He laughed. “Yup, I say the same thing. He said he wasn’t going to ever get married again, but I think she may be the one to change his mind.” He tossed the covers off of him and walked to the bathroom. “Are you still up to go to the park today?”
“Of course. Any chance I get to spend with my two favorite men, I am going to take it. Maybe we can have like a picnic or something. Unless I am being too mushy?”
“No, not at all. A picnic sounds fine. It is a wonderful idea.”
He winked at me, then walked into the bathroom. I exhaled while I laid in the bed. April said that I needed to stop trying to have a pity party to convince myself that I didn’t deserve happiness. I tried, but it was so easy to do. Happiness avoided me for as long as I could remember, so now that it was staring me right in the face, I didn’t know how to accept it. To me, it was just a mirage, and it was only a matter of time before things went back to reality. Then, I would find myself back in my room, reading the same love stories just to realize that I would never truly experience that kind of happiness. Before I could get too deep into thoughts, Gavin walked back into the room. “I’m going to go downstairs and start breakfast. Whenever you’re ready, you should come join us. Okay?”
“I will.”
I stayed in the bed a few minutes longer before I dragged myself out and headed into the kitchen. Vinny was at the stove with Gavin. I stood back and watched the two of them interact. “Dad, can I pour the pancake batter on the skillet?”
“I don’t know, son. I think you might make a mess.”
“I don’t think I will. Dad, I’m eight now. I think you’re going to have to start trusting me a little more.”
I quietly chuckled at his response while Gavin answered, “Oh, well excuse me, sir. I forgot I was talking to a grown man. Okay,” he handed him the pancake batter, “go ahead and show me what you got. Don’t pour too fast, otherwise–”
“We will have pancakes as big as our plates. I know, Dad, I remember you saying that when I was younger. You know, back when I was afraid of doing this. I think I got it now.”
“Okay. Let’s see.”
I positioned myself in the doorway so I could see him pour the pancake batter onto the skillet. Neither of them knew I was watching like a nosey neighbor. Vinny poured the batter into perfectly round circles and with that, he smiled at Gavin. “See Dad, I told you. I can handle it.”
“You were right, kid. I am sorry for not trusting you. Keep at it, and you’ll be ready to drive your own car.”
“I have a few years for that, but for now, I’d say I got this breakfast thing down pretty good.”
It seemed as though Vinny was growing right before my eyes. Gavin spun around to put the batter on the shelf. “Oh, Bethany. How long have you been standing there?”
I smiled. “Long enough to see Vinny show you how to make perfect pancakes. Good job, Vinny.” I hugged him when I got close enough. “I would’ve let you pour the batter as soon as you asked.”
“I know. Dad is just treating me like a baby. He must’ve forgotten that I am eight now.”
“Yup. I think he did.”
Gavin smiled at us and joked, “Oh, so everybody is going to gang up on me today, huh? Alright. Well, just so you know, I poisoned the pancake batter with ex-lax, so if you guys feel a rumble in your stomachs, you know what it is from.”
I grabbed the orange juice out of the refrigerator, “Sure you did, buddy. Sure you did.”
We all helped to finish breakfast, and when we were finished eating, we got dressed and headed to the park. Vinny and Gavin played catch with each other as I sat on the blanket, watching my two favorite men toss the ball around. I don’t know what it was, but as soon as Vinny got a year older, it seemed that something shifted in him. Instead of reading all the time like he did before, he wanted to go outside and play sports. Gavin noticed the difference just as quickly as I did. I figured that hanging out with Andrew had something to do with it because Andrew was a little more active that Vinny was. After they played around for a bit, Vinny headed across the way to the basketball courts to play with a couple other little boys that looked to be his age. Gavin sat next to me. I used a towel to wipe the sweat from his head as he laid back on the blanket.
“Man, I never thought that I’d be playing catch with my son like that. It seemed like he’d be more of a chess or book club kind of guy, you know?”
“Yeah. I was just thinking about that myself. He is starting to get a little taller, too. Maybe the athlete in him is starting to peak a little bit.”
“Well, if it is, then it makes sense. I was quite the athlete in my days.”
I smiled. “Oh, really?”
“Yeah. I’m not just tootin’ my own horn, either. I wasn’t the best student academically, but when it came to sports? Football and basketball was my thing. I thought Vinny was going to take after his mother though. A bookworm kind of kid, you know? I’m glad he is starting to turn the corner a little bit.” We watched him from afar as he took shots at the basket. Some of them clanged hard off the rim, but others found their way through the net. “It’s going to take a little practice, but I’m sure he will develop his skills out there, whether it is football or basketball.”
When he mentioned Vinny’s mother, I thought back to what he said about her during the time he considered breaking up with me. Maybe the ring was for her? “So, how are things between you and his mother?”
Gavin focused his attention to me. “How are things? What do you mean?”
“Relationship-wise. Like, how are you two?”
“Oh. Well, I mean, we are pretty good at co-parenting. She wants him to live with her once he gets to middle school, but now that I see he is taking an interest in sports, I don’t know if I want to do that. I want to be around so I can show him the ropes. I don’t know if she has a boyfriend up there in Philly or not, but I don’t want him stepping on my toes when it comes to that.” I looked away from him. It wasn’t the answer I was looking for. I needed confirmation that there wasn’t anybody else in the picture. “Babe? You don’t think we have anything going on, do you?” I remained silent as he took my hand. “Babe, listen. I love you. I have never felt this way about any woman, not even Karen. I would never mess up what we have together. You have literally been everything in a woman that I have been looking for, and I know I would’ve been kicking myself if I allowed my foolishness to come between us. You are perfect for me in every sense of the word, and I mean it.”
He kissed the back of my hand, then slid closer to me and put his arm around my shoulder. I believed him. I didn’t want to, but there was nothing inside of me that would convince me otherwise. Finally, a smile stretched onto my face. “Good. I didn’t want to have to kill you.”
He laughed. “Yeah, I wouldn’t want that to happen, either.”
The sun beamed down on us as we sat and watched Vinny start a game of pickup basketball. A small group of kids ran in front of us, chasing each other with smiles on their faces. Thick, marshmallow-like clouds floated across the blue horizon. I hoped that things between us would turn out to be as beautiful as the sky above.