Chapter 29

Melissa

Prisoners shouted from the upper windows as Sadie and I marched up the prison's front steps, everything from marriage proposals to lewd questions about my tits. Sadie squeezed my hand reassuringly and kept tugging me forward, even though my heels begged to dig in and pretend none of this was happening. Not that my heart would let them.

"I've never been in a prison before," I admitted in a hushed tone.

We approached the front doors, and she glanced up at me. "Me neither. Try not to think about it too much. Just pretend my brother is away on some retreat or something."

"Right..." I looked up at the ever-vigilant lens of the security camera, swallowing hard. "No sweat."

Sadie yanked on the front door, an industrial hunk of steel that squealed in protest with the force of her pull. She marched through like a woman on a mission, and I scrambled along behind her.

I wasn't sure who was supposed to be comforting whom today. Sadie was great at helping keep me calm when all I wanted to do was crawl up the walls, bawling. I was not as great at keeping her rage in check. I only hoped Jack could help relax her a little because at this rate I could see her doing some damage to the next person who looked at her the wrong way.

The front door led into a small waiting area with a check-in desk and a few chairs. There was a metal detector just before a hallway that led off inside the prison, with a burly looking guard standing in front of it. Sadie stomped over to the desk and gave the guard behind it our details. He checked us in and told us to wait with the others in the waiting area until visitation began.

"This is bullshit," Sadie muttered, slumping down into one of the cheap plastic chairs. "I can't believe my brother's in prison. In fucking prison! Was the judge who denied him bail a Beringer too? Who the hell isn't in this goddamn place?"

"I don't think there are any Beringers in here at least," I said, glancing around at the deflated looking souls also awaiting their turn to speak with loved ones. The prison was a couple of hours outside of Cannon, further than that for Sadie. She was staying the night with me, but she'd have to go back to Tucson tomorrow for school. It was selfish, but I wished she could stay with me until we got Jack back. I hated sleeping alone. All I could think about was how much I missed him. It felt like ten years, even though he'd only been in prison about a week.

"I'm going to skin every last one of them," Sadie muttered through clenched teeth. "I can't believe we're actually visiting my brother in jail right now."

"He won't be here for long."

"We don't know that."

I grabbed Sadie's hand and squeezed. It surprised me how naturally the action came, and when she leaned in against my shoulder, I rested my head on top of hers.

"This is all a misunderstanding," I told her. "It's gotta be."

Inside, I knew that wasn't likely. I knew that Jack was facing near-impossible odds in a justice system that was rigged against guys like him, guys without money or education. I also knew that the crimes he was being charged with were crimes he'd committed. Jack had made a name for himself in illegal bar fights, and his prize for that was an orange jumpsuit with a prisoner number. It made me sick to think about how impossible the situation was, so I tried not to think about it.

"Alright, everybody," yelled the guard standing in front of the metal detector. She gestured over to the metal table beside her, on which rested a stack of plastic boxes. "Line up in front of me. Put your keys, spare change, any metal, and your shoes in here. Wait behind the red line until I call you forward."

Ten minutes later we were inside the prison proper, waiting on one side of the world's most depressing phone booth as the guards ushered in the prisoners. Sadie and I both craned our necks to catch sight of Jack. We saw him at the same time and shot up from our chairs, pressing our hands to the glass in our desperation to get closer to him.

"No touching the glass!" one of the supervising guards yelled.

Sadie shot a glare at him that could have cut diamonds, but he merely turned it right back on her.

Jack, seeing all this, laughed as we all sat down. I picked up the phone and held it between Sadie and me so we could both hear.

"I'm sorry it took me so long to get you on the visitor's list," he said. "Prison is an administrative nightmare."

"I hope that's the only kind of nightmare it is," Sadie said.

Jack shrugged. The sleeves of his jumpsuit were rolled up to his elbows, and his dark hair was messy like he'd just rolled out of bed. I inspected every inch of skin I could see but could find no bruises. I just hoped there weren't any hidden ones.

"It's been fine," he said. "The others leave me alone, for the most part."

"And you've been getting enough to eat?"

Jack's lip curved into a half-smile, eyes twinkling. "Yes, Sadie. And I've been cleaning behind my ears and everything."

"You can't blame her for being worried," I defended. "It's a full-time job these days. Fuck, we both miss you so much."

"And I miss you too." His expression softened, and he sat forward in his chair. "Uh, they're transferring me to a federal prison next week."

"What?" Sadie gasped. "That's so much worse, isn't it?"

Jack winced. "It'll be fine. Even if it isn't, I'm resilient. I'll push through."

Sadie sniffed, and I knew without looking that her angry facade was slowly crumbling into agony. I ran my hand down her back in soothing circles.

"It's okay," I said. "We're going to figure this out. There's gotta be something we can do, right? Do you know how long until they have your trial?"

Something flashed across Jack's eyes, and he shifted in his seat. "It probably won't go to trial. My lawyer says I should do a deal. I have no idea what kind of evidence they have on me, but it doesn't look good. It might just be easier to plead guilty in return for a reduced sentence."

"How reduced?"

He shook his head. "I don't know. It'll depend on how much evidence they have on me and how much more they can gather."

"How could this happen?" Sadie sobbed.

She was breaking my heart. A week ago I wouldn’t have even been able to picture what a crying Sadie would look like, and now I had one sniveling next to me while her brother, the love of my life, faced a future so horrible I was having difficulty wrapping my head around it. I understood what she meant. How could this happen?

Jack smiled in a way that I'm sure was meant to be reassuring, but I'd never seen such sadness in his gaze.

"Don't cry, baby sis. I'll be fine. Three square meals a day and I don't have to pay rent. Plus I've got all the time in the world to get super jacked."

That didn't help either of us, but I forced a smile. Jack shouldn't be the one cheering us up. We should be the ones cheering him up. After all, he was the one in prison.

"I don't want them to transfer you," I said. "I'm going to do whatever I can to make sure that doesn't happen."

"I don't think there's anything you can do, sweetheart."

I shook my head, denial gilding my veins. "There is, and I'll find it. I'll empty out the last of our savings and see if I can take out a loan so we can get you a better lawyer."

Jack frowned. "Don't do that. You'll only end up fucking yourself over. I can survive whatever happens to me as long as I know that the two of you are okay."

We're not, I wanted to say. We're not, and we won't be—not until you're home.

But that wouldn't have helped any of us, so instead, I said, "We'll be good. We've got each other, don't we Sade?"

My surrogate little sister blinked up at me and smiled, nodding her head weakly. "And we'll always have Paris."

"Nerd," Jack quipped.

"Loser," Sadie quipped back.

I laughed, and it was the first time since I got that awful call that I meant it. I wished that I could pull the two siblings in for a big hug, that I could bury my nose in Jack's chest and breathe in his scent. There was just enough of it on the bedsheets to taunt me at night, to remind me that no matter how tightly I wrapped those sheets around myself, they were a poor substitute for the real thing.

"Please just don't sign a confession or anything," I begged. "Not yet. Give me some time."

I caught Jack's gaze and held it, hoping he could read in my expression how deadly serious I was. I wasn't going to lose him—not to hell, high water, or prison.

"Sure, sweetheart. I'll hang on for now. If I get transferred before you get a chance to visit again, just know that I love you both so much and I'm thinking of you every second of every day."

"I know," I said.

Sadie sniffed. "Me too."

"And Sadie..." Jack's eyes crinkled at the corners, and he grinned. "Take care of my girl, okay?"

Sadie and I drove back to Cannon in silence. As soon as we got back to the motel, she'd toss her bag in her car and be back off to university. And I'd be alone. I was dreading the endless hours of silence, especially since I still didn't have a job or a goddamn clue. I was going out tomorrow to look again, but I didn't have much hope. I wasn't holding onto much hope for anything these days.

"He's going to be just fine," I said as we turned onto the exit toward Cannon. "He's the toughest guy I know."

"Do you know anyone else in prison?"

I glanced over at her with a flat expression. "Point taken. All I'm saying is that I know in my heart he'll be fine."

Sadie sighed and looked out the window. "I hope you're right."

Yup, the girl had broken my heart today. She was always so strong and outspoken, so seeing her defeated like this was rapidly sapping my strength. I knew then that however long it took to get Jack back, I'd have to be strong for the both of us. Even though I didn't know Sadie that well, I loved her brother and I loved her and I was happy to do whatever I could to support both of them through this. Was this what it was like to have a family?

"What the fuck..." My thoughts rapidly shifted focus when I turned into the motel parking lot and saw Derek's truck parked not far from Sadie's.

Derek was sitting just inside, drumming his hands on the steering wheel. He pulled his phone out when he saw me and started texting as he urged the engine to life. I parked my car in front of his bumper so he couldn't drive off and wrenched open my door. Sadie followed.

"Hey!" I yelled, tapping on Derek's window until he finally rolled it down. "What are you doing here?"

He smiled up at me like it wasn't incredibly creepy for him to be hanging around outside the place I lived.

"I'm meeting someone here," he said.

"Likely fucking story," I snapped. "You know this is where I live, don't you? Did Donnie send you to spy on me or something?"

"Should I be calling the cops?" Sadie asked.

"I told you, you dumb bitch, I'm meeting someone." Derek's eyes flashed with malice, and he glared daggers over at Sadie. I leaned down into his window and locked eyes with him.

"I'm not stupid," I growled.

"Well you sure fuckin' look it right now," he snarled.

"I'm calling the cops." Sadie's phone was in her hand a second later, and she began to dial.

"Fuckin' fine!" he shouted. "I'll leave. I'll meet my friend elsewhere."

"I hope she doesn't charge extra for that," Sadie retorted.

Derek glared at her, then turned to glare at me. "Donnie wants to talk to you."

"Too fucking bad," I said. "I don't want to talk to him."

I blocked Donnie's number ages ago, as well as those of all his friends. There was no way I was getting anywhere near that asshole.

I turned and walked back to my car so Derek could finally vacate his spot. Before I closed the door, he called out to me, "Don't forget, Mel. Donnie always gets what he wants."