Chapter 29

Chanel

I’d never felt this defeated before. My dad would’ve told me that defeat is another obstacle to overcome, or a stepping stone. That I should be grateful for the failure because at least I’d learn something from it, but this wasn’t the type of failure I could embrace.

This wasn’t a screw up with a design in the work place. It wasn’t a friggin’ cooking failure or a car crash. It was my heart on the line, except the line wasn’t even there anymore. Ryan had jerked it out of reach.

I stared at the cellphone in my hands, and considered shooting off a text to Paula. She’d have some quick-witted advice or a shoulder to cry on, but I couldn’t continue relying on her for everything, especially if I planned on taking this contract.

If I did, I’d be up here for the next month and contact with folks in Meek Springs would be limited. I doubted that Commander Shepherd would care what name I carried for my business, whether it was Scott’s Interiors or just me, alone. A freelance decorator. I’d nailed the presentation and that was all that mattered to him.

The choice was mine. Go back to Meek Springs and live with my overbearing mother, or stay on the base and complete the contract without Ryan here.

It wasn’t much of a choice.

I opened the portfolio on my desk, then reached for my folder of contacts beside it, and brought it across. My mind tried to keep up – my soul felt empty after the talk with Ryan.

I’d fallen in love with him and he didn’t even know. He’d fallen for me and said it was a mistake.

“Stop it,” I whispered, and blinked back tears. “That’s over now. Focus on your work. That’s all that matters.” I didn’t have a mother. I couldn’t lean on Paula and use her as a crutch. I didn’t have Ryan. “You never had him, dumbass.”

I blinked back tears and flipped through the portfolio, to the information I’d marked with sticky notes. I turned to the corresponding page in my contacts folder and traced a line down the row of numbers. I needed paint, and help from some professional painters. I wasn’t about to trust that task to soldiers on the base – they didn’t have the necessary experience and I didn’t want to waste what funding I did have repainting.

“Okay,” I said, “okay. This isn’t so bad. Easy. You can do this.” If I focused on all the tasks at hand, I wouldn’t have time to cry over Ryan or my idiocy in having fallen for him in the first place.

The door creaked open and I frowned, turning toward it. My stomach dipped and whooped back up again. “What do you want?”

Jack Whitmore stood there, gripping the edge of the door, a strange smile twisting his lips. “Is that any way to say hello to an old friend?”

“An old friend? I’ve known you less than a month,” I replied, and tamped down on my fear. Jack’s expression was that of a predator – if I let him see he was getting to me he’d pounce before I got the chance to formulate a plan. “What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be under guard?”

He entered my room and shut the door. Didn’t lock it, though, thank goodness.

“That’s the thing, I shouldn’t be under guard. I wasn’t the one who beat up that kid, and a lot of the soldiers on this base know it,” he said, then cast a glance around the room. He gestured to my bed. “Mind if I sit down?”

“Yes.”

He grinned and plonked down on the mattress anyway. “Thanks,” he said, and hooked one leg up to rest it on the other, knee jutting outward. “You see, most of the soldiers around here know what Ryan is capable of and they don’t believe that I was the one who hurt that kid.”

“I don’t want to talk about this. Or anything. I think it would be better if you left,” I said, and slowly reached for my cellphone. The signal wasn’t the best, but I had Ryan’s office number and I’d call it if I had to, though the thought of relying on him now ate at me.

“But you need to hear it before you continue messing with him. I swear, I’m only here to help you.”

“I said I don’t want to hear it.” I picked up the cell and held it fast.

“You need to. He’s always been a little crazy, but it’s like I said, he was changed when he came back, after he lost all those men. And now, he’s been demoted –”

“What?” Ryan didn’t tell me that.

“Oh, you didn’t know? He was demoted from Lieutenant Commander to Petty Officer. I suppose you’ve heard he’s shipping out to Hawaii soon.”

“Yes,” I replied, but how the hell did he know this? He was a prisoner, or he was supposed to be.

“I have friends,” he said, as if he’d read the question on my face. “A lot of really good friends who know that I’m not capable of hurting another human being. An innocent one, at least.”

“Oh yeah? Then how did you get those marks?” I gestured to the healing wounds on his knuckles.

“These? I fell.”

“You fell on your knuckles,” I replied, deadpan, and surreptitiously unlocked the screen on my cell.

“That’s right. I was running away because of what I’d seen. Ryan scared me.”

“I don’t know what you think you’re going to achieve by telling me this,” I said, “it doesn’t make a difference what you say to me.”

“It has to,” Whitmore replied, then hung his head.

I took the opportunity to scroll through my contacts to the number for Ryan’s office. I hit dial before I could second-guess my decision. I pressed my thumb over the speaker so the sound of ringing wouldn’t travel and alert Whitmore to what I’d done.

“What are you talking about? Why is it so important that I believe this?” I asked.

“Because you’re the only one who can help me put him behind bars. Can’t you see what a manipulator he is?” Whitmore speared me with his gaze. “He’s leaving isn’t he? He probably told you he cared about you, and he’s leaving you behind.”

How did he know any of this? It sent shivers up and down my spine. “That’s none of your business.”

“It’s everyone’s business. He made it our business by getting involved with you. Look, I’m not here to make you feel bad about what happened, but the fact that it did happen jeopardized the entire base. And if Commander Shepherd finds out that you did anything untoward with Ryan, you can bet he’s going to rescind the contract.”

How the hell did he know about the contract? Christ, this was beyond creepy. “Who have you been talking to?” I asked. “Who told you all of this?”

“I have my sources. Friends,” he said. “They’re on my side. I just want you to help me put Baker where he belongs. Behind bars.”

“And if I don’t?” I looked down at the phone, but the call had already ended without being answered.

“Then you’ll lose the contract and I’ll make sure that you never work on another military installation again.”

Asshole. What a total asshole. “No one will believe you, and he’s already been demoted,” I said, “why do you care so much about what happens to him? And don’t give me that story about him having beaten up Timothy. We both know that’s not true.” I had to buy time. I tapped Ryan’s office number again and redialed.

“He has you,” Whitmore said.

My world rocked back and forth. “Huh?” I couldn’t form a proper question in response to that.

“He took you before I had a chance,” Whitmore continued, and tilted his head to one side, studying me up and down, head to toe. Shivers coursed across my skin. “You see, I could’ve had you. You could’ve been my girl, and I wouldn’t have jeopardized this base in the process.”

I opened my mouth then snapped it shut again. Once again, the call ended without going through to Ryan’s office. My pulse ticked up a notch – Christ, what would happen if I didn’t get hold of someone soon?

What if Jack decided to hurt me or… I couldn’t even think it.

“I would’ve treated you like a princess.”

Finally, I found my words. “And threatening me is how you treat a princess? I worked hard to get this contract and now you’re going to try take it away from me if I don’t do what you want.”

Jack scooched off the edge of the bed and sauntered toward me. “Don’t you see? Everything I’ve done has been for you. I want you to be safe.”

He was too close. My body tensed up, muscles corded, and my fingernails bit into the meat of my palms, cutting crescent moons into my skin.

“I want you to have a good life and you could’ve had it with me.”

“P-Paula,” I stammered.

“She’s nothing compared to you. All I wanted was you, all along, gorgeous. I couldn’t even fuck Paula because it drove me mad thinking about you with him.”

Whether this was true or not, Whitmore had a serious envy problem. I’d ended up with Ryan and he wanted to change that, either because he liked me in a psychopathic way or because he wanted to take me from Ryan.

“You know you want this as much as I do,” he said, and pried the phone from my hand. He glanced at the screen and chuckled. “Look at the initiative you’re willing to take. But he didn’t answer, did he? No, he’s probably too busy for you, now. Busy getting ready to leave for another base. Leave you behind like a piece of trash. He used you and now he’s done with you. You’ll never see him again.”

“Stop it,” I said, and tears prickled in the corners of my eyes. “None of that’s true.”

“Then why hasn’t he come to save you from me, huh? That’s what you want, isn’t it? You want Ryan to come save you from big, bad me.” He traced a line down my jaw and I flinched away. “Well, you were right about one thing.”

“What?”

“I did put Timothy in a coma, and I’ll do it to anyone who gets in my way,” he said, and pinched my chin. He shook my head from side-to-side. “If you won’t have me, if you won’t help me, I’ll ruin you. And if that doesn’t scare you… Hmmm, I can fabricate something else.”

I gulped, and sweat dripped down my temples.

“I can picture it now. You beaten black and blue by Ryan. Oh yeah, that would work. See, everyone thinks I’m under guard and everyone’s heard the rumors about you two together. They’ll assume that you had a huge blowout after you found out he’d been reassigned.”

I struggled back but Whitmore held my chin fast.

“And then Ryan will be ruined and so will you. So, what’s it going to be?” he asked. “You going to help me bring him down, or am I going to make you.” Whitmore raised a fist and admired his bruised and battered knuckles.

My choice had changed from staying or going, to staying or possibly dying.

“I love Ryan,” I said, loudly, and glared daggers up at him. Never give up. Never surrender. Don’t show them fear, girl, or they’ll know that they’ve gotten to you. You have one real choice in life: die on your knees or die with integrity. I know which I’d choose.

“What?”

“I love him and I won’t help you,” I said, then squeezed my eyes shut.