Monday, November 25th
Anthony
I sat in my car for what seemed like forever. Here it was going on 3:30 and I had life altering news scribbled down on a piece of paper shoved in my pocket. How was I supposed to take care of Sydney now? I was quite possibly as good as dead. I felt like all the excitement of possibilities with Sydney just got knocked out of me. Maybe it was the right timing and Sydney and I were just not meant to be. Colin always says that things happen for a reason. He was healthy and good for her. No, he was better than good for her. He was what she needed. Fuck. Lets get this over with. I pulled out the paper and flipped it open.
Diagnosis: You are in love! Love makes your chest ache and swell when you see her or hear her name. It makes you do things you never would have ever considered doing before. Like taking her out on a date and then to your place. Love makes you drop your life in order to help her out and it makes your stomach feel like it’s dropping when you hear her voice. When her touch and laughter soothes you and her smile and eye contact brings you to your knees, you’re in love. When you sit on the floor and share your deepest, most painful memories with her and when you feel like your chest has a hole in it when you’re apart, you’re in love.
Treatment recommendation: Love her back. Cherish her, never take a single day for granted, don’t be afraid to make mistakes (they’ll happen). Give her the world because that girl will give herself to you. She will give you 110% every day. Don’t be afraid to dominate her. It’s who you are and it’s who she is. She wants it and needs it. Don’t be afraid to love. You’ve got one of the oldest ailments around. Not everyone gets that, Anth. And as it turns out, it’s not such a bad thing. Don’t be afraid of it.
P.S. She loves you too!
I stared at the note and read it over and over again. I was in love. Holy fucking shit, I was. I never thought it was possible. I soon was laughing and smiling like a loon in my car. I turned my car on and sent Matt a text. I wasn’t ready to vocalize this yet.
AG: This is what love feels like?
MR: Yes, congratulations. It’s the best thing in the world. Be happy. You deserve it, Anth.
AG: Thanks for putting up with me. Sorry about today.
MR: No need to apologize. You’re healthy. Have a great time tonight and call me tomorrow after her appointment.
AG: I will. Hey, don’t tell Colin about this.
MR: I’ve got news for you, he already knows. I didn’t have to tell him.
I was in love. I was in love and getting ready to take my sunshine out tonight. I headed to Colin’s and stopped at a flower shop on the way. I have never bought flowers for anyone before. A flower shop was like a foreign country to me. I wandered for a few minutes and remembered how much she loved the yellow flowers her co-workers gave her. I instructed the florist to make a bouquet of yellow flowers. While I was waiting, a special case off to the side caught my eye. There were a lot of dark flowers. Deep reds and purples that gave off dark hues.
“What are these called?”
“Those are black calla lilies. Well, they’re not really black, but more of a deep purple. They symbolize mystery. Would you like some of those too?”
“Just one. Stick it in the center so it’s surrounded by all the yellow ones.”
She probably thought I was nuts ruining a beautiful bouquet of yellow with darkness. Sydney was the light and I was the dark. I sent Sydney a text while the flowers were being put together and let her know I was almost home. I knew she was looking forward to tonight. I was too. I don’t know how Sydney had never been out on a date but I at least hoped that before Howard she at least had some fun, and went out places.
I opened the front door and came upon Sydney kneeling on the floor with her hands on her thighs and her head down. No, I want her see her face. I tilted her head upward and she smiled widely when she saw the flowers. I suddenly became aware of what Matt wrote on the paper. When just looking at her makes my chest ache.
“I have a present for you, sunshine.”
I held the flowers out to her and she eagerly took them and held them to her chest. She was so excited by the flowers. Something so simple obviously made her day. Thankfully the lady put them in a vase. I knew Colin wouldn’t have something like a vase in his house. And if he did, I’d give him shit over that.
“They’re all so pretty and full of character.”
She carried them to our room and sat on the bed holding them, and continued to talk and smell them while I went into the closet and pulled out some stuff for an overnight visit, just in case. I didn’t need anything because I had stuff at my place, but I tossed some jeans, a tee shirt and sweatshirt in a bag for her for tomorrow. I was going for comfortable clothes for her. I added to the bag her converse, panties, socks and a bra and set the bag next to her on the bed. I pulled the iPad out and connected so we could talk to Colin before our date. He was sitting in his room eating breakfast when we logged on.
“Stuffing your face, Col?”
He nodded and swallowed quickly.
“Hey guys. Getting ready for the night out? You kids be responsible.”
“Yes, dad.” I rolled my eyes at him and Colin nodded upward at the flowers and gazed at Sydney.
“Some guy give you those, baby?”
She laughed and instantly Colin and I looked at each other and smiled. Her laughter filled us with joy. Pure joy.
“Anthony gave them to me. They’re all gorgeous and smell wonderful. Even the dark one.”
I peeked up at Colin. I was pretty sure he’d pick up on the dark flower. He met my eyes and shook his head. I found it interesting that Sydney called it dark instead of black.
“Why do you think it’s pretty? It’s ugly, sunshine. Not pretty like the yellow ones.”
She frowned and looked down at it. “It’s not ugly. It’s special. Besides, you said you picked them out. You wouldn’t have picked out an ugly flower for me.”
When I looked up at Colin, he was laughing.
“Well, the flowers are beautiful, baby. You guys have fun tonight and Sydney; let Anthony take care of you tomorrow. Don’t fight him or push him away.”
“I won’t fight him. Why do you think I’ll fight with him or push him away? I’ll be good. I won’t be bad, I promise.”
At the same time Colin and I both said that’s not what he meant and that she misunderstood. We didn’t want her to think that we thought she was bad or going to misbehave. Sydney gets hung up still on being good or bad and fearing consequences.
I jumped in the shower while Sydney got ready. She had gone shopping with Gina today and found a black spaghetti strap dress. It looked amazing on her, but I knew she was self-conscious. She had a light sweater on the bed that she’d wear tonight. I stood behind her and finished tucking in my shirt while I watched her avoid looking in the mirror at herself. Colin can really help her with her self-esteem.
“Can you please help me with the zipper in the back, Sir?”
As I stood behind her, I kissed her delicate neck while I tugged the zipper upwards. She still had a lot of cuts and wounds on her back that were healing. In time they’d be gone. Physically. I didn’t know how long the emotional wounds would linger. That is yet to be seen.
“You’re beautiful, Sydney.”
I made eye contact with her in the mirror and when she started to look down to shy away, I caught her chin. I shook my head at her letting her know I didn’t want her looking away.
“I still look bad, Sir. I might have a beautiful dress on, but I still have all of these.” She whispered as she held her wrists up and pointed to some cuts and scars.
I set my chin on her shoulder and took her hands in mine so she’d stop pointing out superficial shit. I laced my fingers with hers on each hand and looked into her blue eyes in the mirror.
“I didn’t say that you looked beautiful,” I paused and took her earlobe in my mouth and sucked briefly. I whispered in her ear, “I said you are beautiful, sunshine.”
I gave her butt a playful swat and handed her the sweater she had sitting out. With that, we headed to Urban Towers. I held her hand while we drove but I could feel her anxiety building about tomorrow.
“Sunshine, talk to me. Why are you so quiet?”
“I’m nervous about tomorrow.”
I gave her hand a firm squeeze hoping to infuse some strength in her. “I know you are, sweetie. I will be there for you. I promise.”
I winked at her and got to see my smile. Tonight was going to be about fun because I had a feeling tomorrow was going to be difficult at best. I held her hand and kept her as close to me as possible as we made our way through the casino. My goal for tonight was pleasure and a chance to treat her to a nice night out.
“Mr. Graves, your table is ready.”
Our table was situated on the side of the restaurant that overlooked a quiet waterfall. I know how much she liked the waterfall at work, so I thought this would be perfect.
We picked up our menus and as if on queue, Sydney asked me if I should select her dinner. I picked her hand up and looked across the table in her eyes and ran my thumb over her knuckles. I helped her with ordering because she seems to like that and it removes one worry from her shoulders. After we ordered, I sat back and admired the view of Sydney. I imagined her in many scenarios that featured rope. Nothing advanced like suspension or tying her to an apparatus, just wrapped in rope. A nice pattern around her breasts or maybe her legs wrapped up in a sexy pattern. Sydney would start to make eye contact and then look away. So shy.
“Do I make you nervous, sunshine?”
“No, Sir. I just...” She stopped talking and gazed around the restaurant and then looked back at me. “Sorry. I haven’t been to many nice restaurants. You and Colin have taken me to a lot of nice places. I just was taking it in. And getting used to just you and me.”
I leaned forward in my chair and took hold of her other hand. She looked like she was starting to get jumpy the way her eyes started dancing around and I wanted to calm her.
“Just like the night I took you to Colin’s party, I’m still me. You’ve been used to me for a while now, sunshine.” I gave her a few minutes for that to sink in and calm her mind from running away with itself. I took a sip of my Coke and eased back in my chair.
“So, tell me Sydney. How does a cutie like you get through high school and college without a date?”
“Um, I don’t know. I wasn’t very popular or pretty. Just average. Boring.”
She seemed to be going back in her mind, remembering things. Her cheeks were red and I decided not to venture down this road. It looked like it might be painful.
While we waited for our dinner we talked about movies and music and hobbies. I learned a lot about this little light sitting in front of me. She liked various styles of music, didn’t watch much television or go to the movies. While we were talking about movies, her eyes got really bright and she seemed to get excited about the topic. She revealed that her guilty pleasure were superhero movies and it made me smile as I watched her explain which comic book character movies she liked the best. She was animated as she spoke of a handful movies but the X-Men movies were her favorite. It was wonderful to listen to her speak about herself and interests. I wondered how much of this stuff Howard knew or if the asshole ever bothered to find out.
“Tell me about your hobbies, sunshine. What do you like doing in your spare time?”
“Um, spare time. Hmm, let me think a second.” Her eyes danced around the table and then her eyebrows perked up but then fell again. “Um,” her voice trailed off again and her eye contact dropped. I squeezed her hand and her eyes met mine. “Promise you won’t laugh, Sir?”
“Sunshine, I won’t laugh. Why do you think I’d laugh at something you enjoy doing?”
I wondered if she’d been laughed at over this before. Maybe by Howard.
“Um, it’s kind of dorky. Stupid, maybe.”
“Tell me, sunshine. I want to know you. All of you. I promise I won’t laugh. You should know by now that I’m not judgmental and I don’t break promises.”
She smiled, sat up straighter and began rubbing patterns on the back of my hand with her fingers as I held her other hand. I was curious about what she liked doing but felt ashamed about it.
“I like to write.”
Sydney looked down as if afraid to see my reaction but then looked up at me through her eyelashes and a small smile appeared on her face when she realized I found absolutely nothing wrong with it. I met her smile with one of my own.
“It’s not stupid, Sydney. I think that’s great. What sort of things do you write about?”
“Um, just stuff. Stuff.” She said rather quickly and I swear that I saw her eyes fill up with tears. Sydney looked away and I felt that I needed to move away from this topic. Things were making sense to me though. It’s how she dealt with Howard. She had no one to talk to, no one to help her, no one to hold her, no one to bandage her up. She dealt with it all on her own and the only outlet she had was a piece of paper and a pen. I’m so glad Colin gave her that notebook. He has no idea how good it’s been for her and I was going to tell him. He needed to know that he was doing something right with her too. I squeezed her hand and nodded at her. I hoped she knew that I understood why she most likely liked to write.
As we continued to talk about ourselves, she kept using the word “um” every now and then, which indicated that she was nervous. I had hoped the longer we sat together talking, the word “um” would be used less until it faded away. But it was still very present.
“Sunshine, why are you nervous? And before you try to deny it, please know that I can tell you’re nervous.”
She set her fork and knife down and looked over the ledge to the waterfall. Fuck, I can’t do this right. I can’t get her to talk like Colin can. I say the wrong things.
“Sorry, Sir. It’s just a lot to take in. This is a really nice place and you’ve brought me here.”
“Yes. Yes, I did. I wanted to. Period.”
I got the impression that she felt like she didn’t belong again. She seemed to get what I was saying and didn’t argue with me.
“You and Colin are too good to me.”
“You deserve to be treated well. You’re a sweet girl.” And I’m in love with you, I wanted to add but didn’t know the right way to say it. When I say it to her, it’ll be the right way.
We continued to chat away and when the waiter came by I pointed to the M&M brownie sundae on the menu while Sydney looked down at the waterfall. I didn’t say anything but sat looking at her while we waited for the dessert. Her eyes hold a lot of emotions. She’s a cautious girl and is afraid to trust, yet somehow she’s trusted Colin and me from the beginning. And she’s learning to trust our friends, because she knows we trust them. She trusts our judgment and is getting better. But I can’t help but go back to her trusting Colin and I so quickly. She nearly dies at the hands of a so-called Dom, but she easily trusts two very dominate males. I didn’t know for sure if I could take care of her the way she needed, but I knew that I’d gladly die trying. And so would Colin.
The dessert was placed on the table and Sydney and I were each handed a spoon. I looked over at her and saw the brightest smile I’ve seen.
“Anthony, it has M&M’s!”
“I know. Don’t worry, I’ll eat around them, sunshine.”
I motioned for her to dig in while I snapped a picture of her eating the sundae, smiling and then sent it to Matt and Colin. It’s so easy to make Sydney smile. She’s not a complicated, bratty sub. She’s perfect for me.
After we ate she and I strolled through the casino and I showed her a lot of the restaurants and bars. We walked outside by the pools where music was playing. I pulled her against me and took her lips. She didn’t hesitate and kissed me back. Mine. She blushed and smiled. So fucking cute. I could take care of her. Give her everything under the stars. With her hand in mine we continued to stroll the grounds of Urban Towers.
“So, how did your interest start in rope and rigging? The rope photographs at Irons are impressive.”
“I sort of fell into it, I suppose. Kind of a quiet way for a kinky guy to get off. I was pretty young when I joined Irons and took advantage of every opportunity to learn things. A Master was giving lessons on erotic bondage. I picked up on it and started doing it in the club with some subs in rope. The rest, as they say, is history.”
We headed back inside and I led her over to a set of elevators for penthouse residents. She didn’t know that I lived here. I held her hand and let my wallet hoover over the card reader and then the elevator opened. She and I leaned against the back wall of the elevator and we were greeted with the automated voice.
“Destination, penthouse.”
I took a chance and glanced down at her and my eyes were met with her smile and a flirty gleam in her eye.
I smiled at her and squeezed her hand. While I watched the floor numbers zip by I began to second-guess my decision to bring her up here. I knew it was a positive step for me but I hadn’t really thought about how she’d react. Would she think I was bringing her here expecting sex? That wasn’t the case at all. I had never brought a woman here. And until Sydney, I’ve never wanted to. But this was a part of me and I wanted to share it with her. It wasn’t nearly as nice or comfortable as Matt or Colin’s places were, but this was mine.
We arrived on the top floor and I led her down a corridor to my door. Five penthouses made up the entire fiftieth floor and one was mine. I swiped the card and the door to my sanctuary popped open and lights began to come to life. I held the door open and motioned her in. She smiled and stepped across the threshold and I followed. I noticed that valet had sent the overnight bag up and was sitting on the counter.
I let her explore the entryway that spilled into the kitchen, dining area and great room. It was an open floor plan and the great room had floor to ceiling windows that overlooked the Las Vegas Strip. It was a bachelor’s party place though I’ve never used it as such.
“Oh, wow! Look at this, Anthony!”
Sydney quickly walked over to the windows and looked up and down the Strip. I slowly wandered behind her and watched her look out the window.
“This is the coolest hotel in the city I bet. This view is amazing.”
I leaned against the window and looked down at her while she gazed at the city lights. She didn’t know that I brought her to my place and thought we were in a hotel. How would she know anyhow? I never told her I lived here. As I glanced around, I realized how sterile and empty this place really is. It always has been empty. Except now, I had this beacon of light wandering around in here. I brushed the back of my hand down her cheek and felt my heart begin to beat faster when she leaned into my hand. She smiled and looked up at me. I felt that funny ache in my chest and stomach. This love shit is going to kill me.
“This isn’t a hotel, sunshine. Urban Towers is a casino but all of the living space in the towers is owned. People live here.” I paused until I saw the light bulb go off. She turned and looked around the place and then back at me. “I live here. This is my home.”
“Yours? But…” she turned and looked at nothing. Nothing here would signify that a person calls this their home.
“I never really cared much for decoration. Obviously.” I smiled at her and she took hold of my hand and continued to gaze out the window.
“This is the most amazing view.”
“I used to think that too, until you popped into my life. Then I discovered that the best view is waking up seeing you asleep on my chest. You’re what I love looking at.” I waved my hand at all the lights and the view. “This doesn’t smile back at me or make me feel good. You do.”
She looked nervous again and began looking down. She was frowning and I could tell that she was thinking because her eyes were moving rapidly from side to side.
“Hey,” I tilted her head so she’d look up at me. “What’s wrong? Do you want to leave? We can. I just wanted to bring you here and show you where I live.”
“You…you like looking at me?”
She was at a loss over that? Colin really can help her in the self-confidence department. I smiled at her and told her that I enjoyed looking at her and watching her smile. I poked her nose with my finger and moved away from the window towards the kitchen.
“You’re going to have to get used to that, sunshine.” I took my blazer off and tossed it on a chair before I made it to the kitchen. “Would you like some coffee?”
“Yes, please.” She followed me to the kitchen and hopped up on a barstool. I probably surprised her when she saw me move around the kitchen knowing where everything was. I started the coffee and rolled up my sleeves and kept my eyes on hers. I stretched my arms out just to the side of me and leaned on the counter gazing at her. She innocently sat there and continued to look around.
“I like your blue cabinets. They match your car and your watch. Is blue your favorite color?”
I nodded and watched another smile appear on her face. She told me that blue was her favorite color too. I smiled and poured us each a cup of coffee and we headed over to the couch. I sat on the couch and propped my arm up on the back of the cushions and she leaned right into me. I felt my chest start to act up again but I didn’t worry about it now. I welcomed the feeling.
“I can’t believe you brought me here, Anthony. Colin told me that you don’t bring anyone here.”
“That’s right. Just Colin, Matt and Blake. I think Gina’s been here once. And you.”
“I’m flattered. I’m honored that you think enough of me to bring me to your home. You know Colin and Matt like the back of your hand, and you don’t bring them here much but you brought me here and barely know me.”
I let my head lean back on the couch cushions and laughed. Seriously, how could she think that?
“Sorry, sunshine. I don’t mean to laugh, but how can you say that?” I brushed a piece of her hair behind her ear and looked deep in her eyes. “I know some of the most personal, intimate, deepest and darkest things about you that a person can know about someone else.” She nodded and looked down but I caught her chin, kissed her and pulled her back to lean on me. I stroked her arm as I continued.
“I know what’s in the nightmares that wake you up at night, and I know what it takes to chase them away to calm you so you can sleep. I know you love M&M’s, especially the green ones with the blue ones being a close second. I know you look downward when you feel shy. I know you twist and pull at your fingers and say ‘um’ when you’re nervous. I know you’re cautious when in a room full of people, and I know you try to keep track of all of them. I know that you have a huge, giving heart despite everything you’ve been through. I know how to make you smile. I know you like to have your nipples pinched and your clit rubbed on the left side. I know you’ll always prefer cheese pizza. I know you love Converse shoes and that you’re into kink.” I heard her sniffle and knew they were good tears.
“I know you feel safe with Colin and I, and I know you’ll be a wonderful submissive to your Dom because you’ll give him your personal best; all of the time. I know that you crave to be held and hunger for affection. I know your hips are still tender but, you like when I rub lotion over them. I know you’re my sunshine and Colin’s baby. I know you held onto me for dear life that horrible night. I know you worry about not being good enough for a good Dom. I know that Colin cares about you as much as I do. I know when I wink at you; your cheeks get red and your eyes sparkle. I know you’re worried and scared about tomorrow. I know that your left hand is your dominant hand, even though you write with your right hand. I know you come quietly because you’ve been told not to make any noise. I know you love superheroes. I know you’re scared of closets, but you’ll push your fear aside for someone else’s benefit. I know that before Colin and I, sex scared you. You were hurt by it. I know you like having your tummy rubbed when you don’t feel well and that you treat my bicep as a security blanket.” I reached down and wiped away her tears with my thumb and pulled her to sit on my lap so I could look in her eyes.
“I know, that I don’t know, how you got all of these cuts and scars, but I know I’ll find out. I know Colin and I can replenish what Howard took from you. Colin and I can help you find yourself and help you explore the lifestyle.” I smiled at her and pulled a smile through her tears. I pulled her closer so our foreheads were touching.
“I don’t know everything Sydney, but I know that I want to be in your life. And Colin does too.”
She nodded at me and wrapped her arms around my shoulders and hugged me. I held her close and whispered in her ear, “I know more about you than you think, sunshine.”
“You know more than anyone. You are so special to me, Anthony.” She kissed me and my heart swelled with pride. I was important to her. We sat like that for a while and then I wanted to lighten the mood. Tomorrow had the potential to be rough and I wanted tonight to be fun.
I nipped playfully at her lip and held her face in my hands. Her face felt so small in my hands and she felt so breakable. With her chin between my thumb and index finger, I pulled her closer to me until I could feel her warm breath on my lips. I wanted this young woman. My eyes closed as I pressed my lips against hers. I claimed that sweet mouth of hers and let my tongue mingle with hers. I finally pulled my mouth away from hers and smiled when she leaned towards my face for more.
“Sydney, has a man ever made love to you?”
She shook her head. I didn’t push for a verbal response. Her head motion was loud enough. I wondered if she had been a virgin when she met Howard in her twenties. I knew she was involved with Howard at least since she started working for Openin. So that was at least ten or eleven months ago. I could see her having been with him a little longer. Not much though because I don’t know how she’d survive much more. Most likely she wasn’t a virgin when she met him. She’s almost twenty-eight and I was kind of glad that asshole wasn’t her first.
“Sunshine, I’d love to be the first man to make love to you.”
She nodded and began kissing me again. I calmed myself down and told myself over and over that I had to go slow and be extra gentle with her. Colin and I have been with her sexually but we haven’t made love to her. To be honest, I don’t think I’ve ever made love to a woman. It’s all been kinky fucking. Just physical, dominating sex. But each time I’ve sunk into Sydney at Colin’s, I’ve felt something for her.
She reached between our bodies and playfully flicked my nipple. I gazed into her sparkling, flirty eyes. What the fuck was I going to do with this girl? I just shook my head in wonder at her and listened to her gentle, playful laugh.
“Sydney Morgan Burke. What am I going to do with you?”
She looked up at me through her eyelashes.
“I don’t know, Anthony something Graves.”
I picked her up and carried her down the hall to my room all while making out with her. I unzipped her dress on the way. I gently set her on the bed and gazed in her eyes as I took my clothes off slowly. I took them off slowly so it would calm me and keep me from moving too fast. I removed the condom from the pocket of my jeans. I took a few from Colin’s just in case and set the one from my pocket on the nightstand.
Once I was naked, I knelt down and took her shoes off and made a trail of kisses from her left foot going up her leg to her hip. I didn’t touch her pussy but got a whiff of her arousal and drug my tongue from her left hip across her tummy to her right hip. I made a kiss trail from her right hip down to her right foot taking her panties down as I went. She giggled and I felt myself harden. Control Graves, I told myself. Calm and controlled.
I took her by her hands and pulled her to stand up. I kissed her lips while I slid the straps off her shoulders and felt the material brush my skin as it dropped to the floor.
“Sunshine, yellow to slow, red to stop. Understand?”
“Yes, Sir. Anthony.”
Fuel for my fire. I gently pushed her to lie down and I placed soft kisses on her bruised tummy as I made my way down to her pussy. It was intoxicating for me. I gave her slow, soft licks and then treated myself with a long lick from her slit all the way up to her clit. She moaned lightly and began to lift her hips for more. I laughed quietly, and gently pushed her hips back down to the mattress. Painless sex play nearly gives her an orgasm. I leaned over her small frame, holding myself up with my arms, elbows locked, hands resting by her sides. I lowered to take a nipple in my mouth. I massaged the hard pebble with my tongue and felt her waist rise up off the mattress again. I couldn’t help but laugh quietly and calmly as I pushed her hips into the bed. I knelt between her legs and reached for the condom while keeping my eyes on her. I opened the package quietly and rolled the condom down my length and went back to kissing her. I kept myself propped up on my arms and didn’t let my body weight press into her. I couldn’t risk it being a trigger and didn’t want her to feel trapped under me. I wasn’t a light, small guy and worried my 6’2” and 225-pound frame might overwhelm her.
I found a comfortable position on my side and pulled one of her legs over my hip opening her up to me. While I continued to kiss her, I slowly pushed myself into her warm, wet pussy. I stilled, and kept us in that position for a bit. I leaned my head back so I could look at her and make sure she was doing okay. She was smiling and those dark blue eyes of hers consumed mine.
“Okay, sunshine?”
“Yes, Sir.”
I held her against me and rolled us over so I was on my back and she was on top of me. She kept looking at me and held her hands tensely on my shoulders. I took her hands in mine and pushed her up to full sitting position. I began to let go of her hands but she tightened her grip on mine and I saw a hint of nervousness in those eyes. I got it. This was a vulnerable position for her. Holding my hands gave her strength. I smiled and nodded at her letting her know that I understood. I moved slowly with her sitting on top of me and stared at her. I felt like she might very well be an angel. From our positioning, the light from the hallway was shining around her. She was gorgeous as she sat perched on my cock, gripping my hands as we moved slowly together.
Her eyes shut and she began meeting my thrusts. She was close. Her hands flew from mine and grabbed onto my chest. She was digging her nails into my chest and I felt like she threw more gasoline onto my fire. I willed myself to keep calm but with those nails in my skin it was hard. It really turned me on. I set one hand on her hip and let my other one take hold of her nipple. I began rolling it between my fingers and felt her pussy clamp down on me. I couldn’t help but smile at her. Can’t take the kink out of the fragile kitten. She began gripping me a little harder and was grinding down on me more.
“That’s it, sunshine. Grab my cock with your pussy.”
Apparently dirty talk also creates a positive explosion in her. She moved just a few more times and then came quietly. She was starting to bend in the middle and then flattened down against me. It was when her body became parallel to mine that my own orgasm caught me off guard. I held her against me by her butt cheeks while I came.
She was breathing hard and resting against my chest. We stayed like that for a long while until I finally softened and slipped from her, which caused her to laugh softly. I love that sound. I pulled the sheets up around her because I knew she was already getting cold.
Finally I got up just long enough to get a damp cloth to clean her up a bit so she wouldn’t get chapped. I remembered to leave the bathroom light on and shut the door part way. She liked having the light on. I also left the hall light on for her and climbed into bed. She instantly fell in our usual position with her body pressed against me, head on my chest and my arm around her. As we lay quietly, skin-to-skin, all I could think of was how this young woman has changed my outlook on things. I wanted to give her everything and be her everything. I swallowed hard and glanced down at her head resting on my bare chest.
“Davis.”
“What?” She asked sleepily while swirling her fingers in my chest hair.
“Davis. Anthony Davis Graves.”
Sydney propped herself up on an elbow and looked in my eyes. A beautiful smile spread across her face. She told me ever since that day in the courtyard at work when Colin and I gave her our Irons cards that she’s been trying to figure out our middle names.
“I never would have guessed yours was Davis. I thought it might be Daniel or possibly David. But I never thought of Davis.”
I reached up and brushed a few tendrils behind her ears while I gazed into her eyes. She has gorgeous eyes. They’re so caring and when I talk she seems so interested in what I have to say. I gently pulled her downward to put her head on my chest again.
“Anthony, tell me what Colin’s middle name is. Gregory? George?”
“Gage. Colin Gage Everett.”
In her sleepy voice she whispered Colin’s full name and mine. I could feel her smiling against my chest. It was getting late and tomorrow was our appointment with Chris.
“Sleep well, sunshine.” I kissed her forehead and drifted off to sleep.
“No…’lease stop.” I was groggy but was getting jostled around a bit. I felt a hand graze over the wound on my chest from Paul’s whip and jerked awake and looked down. Sydney’s hand. Nightmare. “Fire, ‘lease stop…my…back.”
I sat up and pulled her onto my lap as she was pushing against me a little bit. This was common with her nightmares as she came out of them and separated from the dream state to reality. I expected this reaction each time and let her push at me until she sorted out that she was safe. I stroked her hair and kissed her forehead as I do each time and reminded her she was safe.
“Sunshine, sweetheart. It’s just a bad dream. Relax, sunshine.”
When her eyes opened, it made my chest hurt to see her so scared and hurting. She frowned and looked down at her hand that was pushing against my wound. I looked down and saw it was red and there was some blood. Quickly she removed her hand and started to apologize.
“Sunshine, stop sweetie. Don’t apologize. It’s okay.”
She started looking around the room and I saw a flash of panic. She was a little disoriented still.
“Sweetie, it’s my room. Remember? We went to dinner, had that M&M sundae and came upstairs to my place. It’s my place. Just you and me. You’re safe.”
Her head stopped looking around the room and she nodded. I felt her sag in my arms and then the tears started.
“Shhh, it’s okay.” I quickly glanced around trying to find a throw or a blanket that I knew I didn’t have.
Colin always had them lying around. I’m so clueless. I gathered her in my arms and carried her to the bathroom and pulled a big towel off the rack and draped it around her. I carried her to the kitchen and set her on the counter. Her head hung and the tears continued to fall.
“My back hurts, Anthony.”
She looked up at me with eyes that tore right through me. She kept arching her back trying to reach around to touch where she hurt. She pulled her hand around and looked down. We were both shocked when we saw blood on her fingers. Her breathing immediately sped up and I moved a little quicker than I meant to and pulled the towel off her shoulders. I saw what had happened. One of the places that had been healing up had a scab forming over it. Part of the scab pulled away from the skin and she was bleeding there. Before I tended to that, I knew I had to calm her down.
“Sunshine,” I said; but she was just staring at the blood on her fingers. I took the towel and wiped the blood from her hand. “Eyes.” I waited and she looked up at me.
I explained what happened. She probably moved around during the nightmare and the sheets pulled the scab away. She understood and even smiled a small smile at me. But I could see the shame and guilt on her face.
I went to my bathroom and frantically looked for a bandage. Fuck! I didn’t have any. I grabbed a few tissues and headed back to the kitchen. I pulled some tape from the drawer and began making a bandage. With a pen I drew a smiling sun and held it up for her to see.
“That will work.” She smiled at me and I gently taped it to her back. In the morning, I’d get a proper bandage on her.
I glanced around my vacant looking kitchen and remembered the M&M’s. I pulled open a drawer and took out a small bag of the candy. She smiled and I felt like a hero. I grabbed a bottle of water and the candy in one hand and picked her up and went to the couch.
I was just getting settled with her when she asked, “What’s that yellow thing?” The sock monkey. I reached over and grabbed it off the chair and leaned back on the couch. She was lying between my legs and took some M&M’s from my hand when I set the monkey on her stomach over the makeshift blanket.
“It’s for you. I actually got it the day I went shopping for some clothes for you. While you were in the hospital, Matt told Colin that it would be good for you to have something to hold. So when I went shopping, I saw this and picked it up. I know what you’re thinking; did I forget to give it you? No, I didn’t. You had been hanging onto my arm at night and I was being selfish. I didn’t want you to stop holding onto me for the monkey. So I kept him here.”
“The monkey is definitely cute and soft. But he can’t take care of me like you can.”
I was thrilled to hear her say that. She liked the monkey and held it over her chest. We ate the M&M’s on the couch and then once she had a chance to calm down we went back to the bedroom. I glanced down at the sheets and saw a little blood from her cut where the scab tore away.
“Sorry about your sheets, Sir. And for hurting your chest wound. I made you bleed.”
“It washes,” I told her so she wouldn’t worry. But then she said something that hit me like a ton of bricks.
“Water washes it all down the drain.”
What disturbed me so much was that she and I both had a lot of experience with washing blood off of us.
We got into bed and I held her close until it was time to get up. I wasn’t able to fall back asleep. It was 4:35 a.m. when we got back in bed and I began letting my head run away with thoughts. I was careless not to have bandages around for her and I didn’t even have a fucking blanket for her. How clueless can I be? If Colin saw the tissue bandage I made and taped to her back he’d slug me for being an idiot. I hadn’t even thought about the ink possibly seeping through from the tissue. What if it gave her an infection? I glanced down at it and slowly peeled it off.