Friday, November 22nd
Anthony
I feel like I might be coming down with the flu or something. I was feverish and ached all over. I felt like I had horrible heartburn and looked up from where I was sitting just in time to see my sunshine walk towards Evan. I had to get over there and support her and push my feelings aside.
I sat on the back of the couch next to Colin and kept my mouth tightly shut. I held my breath while Evan put his hands on her arms as he leaned closer to tell her something I couldn’t hear. I wanted to yell at him to get the fuck away from her ears. Those were mine. I suck on those. Mine.
I thought of that deep dark bruise she has on her upper arm where Evan was touching. He didn’t know her body like Colin and I did. My stomach hurt when he took her hand and led her to the chair. My hand.
Soon he’d have her head buried in his lap and I don’t know if I could stand watching that. He told her to undress and she began fumbling. This was stupid for us to have allowed this on the main floor. We should have insisted a private room where she couldn’t be distracted or potentially triggered by sounds of other scenes. This was too much.
Nerves were getting the best of my sunshine and she tripped and fell. I jumped off the back of the couch and met Evan’s eyes. Why the fuck was he looking at me and not her? She should be his focus, not me! She held her hand outward as if she was anticipating him to hit her.
“Anth, you have to help Evan,” Colin said quietly to me.
Seeing Sydney preparing herself to be hit by Evan broke my heart. She was sheltering her head and had her eyes closed facing the other way. I kept my head about me and approached the scene respectfully and slowly. Evan was crouched by Sydney but wasn’t touching her. I stopped at a respectable distance. Evan looked up and motioned me over.
“Little sub, I think you need your Dom,” he said quietly to Sydney.
Fuck me. Why does everyone have to do that shit? He’s only confusing her more. I knelt down and took hold of her arms and pulled her against me.
“I’ve got you, sunshine.” I kissed the top of her head and felt myself calm down now that she was in my arms.
“I think she’d like to play, but she needs you, Graves.”
Normally I don’t have random threesome partners and never, ever played without the second male being Colin. But for Sydney, I would. She had wanted this so badly and I would do damn near anything for her and to bring a smile to her face. I wanted her happy. I took her face in my hands and searched her eyes for fear of continuing. She looked calm again.
“Sunshine, do you still want to play?”
“Yes, Sir.”
My heart was pounding as if I was running in a marathon and my stomach felt like I had been punched. It was a simultaneous reaction to hearing her call me “Sir” in Irons. The fire was already lit deep in me and I had it under control, to a simmer; but calling me “Sir” in here was like throwing gas on the flame.
I nodded at her and told her to get into the present pose and looked over at Evan letting him know I was deferring to him. It was his scene after all. I was here for Sydney. Evan recognized this, nodded his thanks, told Sydney to stand up as he stood behind her. He began stroking her arms and then moved his hands to the top of her skirt. Fuck, I don’t know how long I can watch him touch her. I had to remind myself that this was for her and I had to remain calm and as professional as possible. Despite it ripping me apart.
“Eyes, sunshine.” Since I wasn’t the one touching her, I had to maintain form of contact with her. Evan was the first man to touch her sexually, aside from Colin and I, since Howard. Sydney flinched when Evan touched her sides. I stepped forward to get her to engage and connect with my eyes. The only way I could keep on top of how she really was doing was with her looking at me. Her eyes jumped to mine and I could see calmness come over her and a smile appear on her face. Evan ran his hand up the outside of her legs. He threw a cocky smile over at me.
“Little sub, go take his shirt off.”
Without hesitation Sydney came over to me and began working her hands down my torso opening my shirt as they went. Her eyes were ablaze and excited. Oh fuck me, her hands felt good on my body. Her fingertips lightly grazed my chest as she opened my shirt. She pushed the shirt off my shoulders and I tossed it over to one of the chairs.
“Take her panties off, Graves.”
I looked deep in her eyes and kept looking for something to tell me to stop, but I never saw it. I put a hand on her shoulder and then another on her waist just above the chapped skin and slowly turned her to face Evan. She hadn’t flinched when I touched her and her body felt calm under my hands. I placed some kisses on her shoulder then down her back as I knelt down until I reached the place between the two dimples above her butt. I had my hands on her waist and pressed my face against her lower back. Something came over me as I knelt there with my face pressed against her back inhaling the vanilla scent. Mine. I opened my mouth but couldn’t make the words come out. I hooked my thumbs under the elastic of her panties and slid them down and off. My sunshine was bare naked. Every wound, every welt, every cut, every burn and every bit of torment that Howard inflicted upon Sydney was out for anyone within proximity to gaze upon.
“Good, little sub,” Evan murmured.
Evan sat a few feet away in his chair admiring her. I had to push the urge down to cover her back up. His scene. I had to help and give support. That was my role. I had to give her some direction though as Evan was still somewhat clothed. I pushed the bile down before I instructed her to take Evan’s pants off. I put my hand over my stomach, ran my hand through my hair and paced a few feet near them. Belt.
“Stop!” I said loud enough for both to hear and look over at me. “Evan will undo his belt and then you’ll remove his pants.”
I looked at Evan and could tell we were both thankful that a potential issue was adverted. For fuck’s sake, I’ve got to pull it together and pay the fuck attention. Evan undid his belt as I did, and then Sydney took his pants the rest of the way off. Of course, fucking Evan wasn’t wearing underwear. He knew he was getting blown by my sunshine tonight so why the fuck bother? Fuck, I shouldn’t be doing this. I wasn’t in the right frame of mind. I was being sarcastic to myself and that wasn’t good. I had to pull it together. Concentrate Graves and deal with it afterwards.
Evan was hard and let his eyes roam all over my sunshine. I felt like I was burning up and thought I could be sick at any moment. My chest was aching and I began to wonder if this is what it feels like right before a heart attack. I felt sick, dizzy and was sweating.
“Pull his cock out and put it in your mouth, little sub,” Evan instructed her.
Fuck me! I stood still and kept looking in her eyes while she unzipped me and pulled my dick out from behind my boxer briefs. I saw the top of her head get closer to my abdomen and then I felt her warm mouth. Her sweet, warm mouth forced my eyes to close. Oh, fuck I was in trouble here. She worked on me for a few minutes before Evan spoke up, yanking me from a calm, special moment.
“Graves, put her on the coffee table on all fours. She can blow me while you fuck her from behind.”
I wanted to tell him to go fuck off. He was ready to enjoy the main course of his scene. He went to a drawer in one of the end tables while I helped Sydney onto the coffee table. I checked her eyes; clear and dilated pupils. She was okay but I was far from it. I let my hand rub gently down her back and jump over a nasty looking welt and reconnected with her skin just below the wound. Mine.
Evan stood in front of her and tossed a condom over her head so it landed on her back. It hit one of her welts and she jerked. Fucking Evan. He made a face when Sydney reacted and realized that wasn’t a very considerate move on his part. He picked it up and handed it to me.
“I get the front,” he announced.
Yeah, no fucking shit. It’s what he fucking negotiated with her. Wait. I hadn’t negotiated anything with her. Thankfully, Evan picked up on my unease with the situation.
“Little sub, are you okay with Master Graves taking you from behind?” He looked down at her and asked as he brushed her hair off her face.
“Yes, Sir.”
I ran my hands through my hair before opening the condom wrapper quietly. I quickly glanced up at Evan and got his attention. He still hadn’t opened his and I held my hand out for it. He looked at me cautiously but handed it over. I opened the package quietly and handed it back over her head to him. He understood that I knew something he didn’t. I know lots he fucking doesn’t. This was my sunshine. Mine. I quickly rolled the condom down my length and rubbed over her butt cheeks. I could see that Evan was now ready.
“Tell me your safe word, little sub.”
“Red.”
“Open,” Evan instructed.
I felt like passing out. I had to turn my head when I saw him push into her mouth. My sunshine’s mouth. Mine.
No, not mine. I can’t give her what she needs. I’m too dark for her. She needs someone like Colin.
“Ready, sunshine?”
“Mmmhmm.” She wiggled her butt at me. It made me smile and feel better. I sunk into her in one move and I gently held her sides. I couldn’t watch her work on Evan’s dick with her mouth. Hearing Evan’s grunting noises were enough and I could do without the visual.
I closed my eyes and moved gently with her. She started bouncing back against me wanting it harder or deeper as if she couldn’t get enough of my dick. I was turned on by being able to play with her in the club, but I’d rather Evan not be involved.
I looked down and concentrated on slow, deep thrusts. I made sure that I wasn’t holding her too tightly. I was trying to block out the noises coming from Evan. I was close to having a heart attack I thought. My chest hurt and wasn’t letting up. I need to see a doctor or talk to Matt. Something isn’t right.
Sydney pushed back at me for more. She was undoing me. Evan was pumping faster into her mouth. I felt Sydney’s pussy clench down on my cock and I stilled to try and control myself. Fuck me, I lost it. Sydney was coming on my cock but was quiet as I knew she would be.
“Sunshine,” I whispered and closed my eyes.
I heard Evan making some noise indicating he was close and suddenly I felt Sydney go stiff. My eyes popped open and I looked down at Evan’s hands on the back of her head. Fucking kidding me? We fucking talked about this!
“Evan,” I got his attention and pointed at his hands. He quickly yanked them away and shut his eyes while he moaned.
“Ah fuck!” He moaned, pulled out from Sydney’s mouth, ripped the condom off his dick and blew his load all over my sunshine’s face. I stood there appalled as he continued to spew on her.
“Fuck, Evan! Red, goddamn it!” I said with enough force to get him to look at me. And I’m sure most everyone else on the main floor turned to look at me. I was livid. I pulled out of Sydney gently and went to where Evan stood in front of Sydney. I knelt down and took her face in my hands. Fucking Evan’s fluids were all over her face. My sunshine’s face. Her eyes were somewhat glazed over and she lowered her head to look at nothing in particular or maybe to hide.
“Sunshine, sweetheart look at me,” I whispered to her. Fuck! I looked over to find Colin and saw him standing closer now with hands on his hips and Matt was right beside him. Both looked pissed but were both waiting at a distance. I knew they’d jump in the second they knew it was necessary. They better fucking jump in. I was beginning to panic. Movement from behind me caught my attention and I turned to see Blake set a couple clean towels and a bottle of water down on the coffee table. I looked back at Sydney and she appeared to still be the same.
“Sunshine, look at me. Let me see your eyes…please,” I whispered the ‘please’ part so only she’d hear me.
Evan had moved and was now standing behind me.
“She okay?” He asked me quietly. He actually had the fucking balls to ask me that. I quickly went to the coffee table and grabbed the two towels and knelt in front of Sydney again.
“Graves, is she okay?”
“Move, Evan.”
I tilted her head up gently to look at me and I saw something flicker in her eyes and they began to soften. I smiled at her and began wiping her face off with the damp towel and then pat dried it with the other towel. There, better.
“Eyes, sunshine. Keep them on me.”
Her eyes focused on mine and I felt an aching pain in my chest. Fuck, not now chest. I stood, zipped and buttoned my jeans quickly before I picked Sydney up. I had to get her away from all this fucking shit and give the best aftercare I’ve ever given. I grabbed a throw and draped it over her as I carried her.
“Graves!”
Evan still wanted his fucking answer. Did he have eyes?
“She’ll be okay, Evan,” I said as I brushed past him.
As I got closer to Colin and Matt, Colin nodded at me like I was doing something right. I fucking hoped so. A lot was riding on me right now. Colin and Matt both put their hands on my shoulder as I passed and Colin pointed to an empty area by the windows that faces out over the landscaping in the back of the building. Paul was standing off to the side with his arms folded, watching. I couldn’t give a fuck about anyone else right now but Sydney.
I sat down on the sofa with Sydney cuddled against me and her head resting against my chest and shoulder. Her hand rested against my chest, right over where the aches were coming from. Maybe it was the pressure of her hand, but the aches seemed to subside for the time being.
“I’ve got you, sunshine. Just you and me.” I lowered my head to kiss the top of her head and then let my own head rest against the cushions.
What the fuck was happening to me? She felt perfect in my arms. I could take care of her. I could. I knew her fears, worries, some of her past torment and knew how to make her smile. That had to be worth something.
She shifted in my arms and I quickly looked down at her and made sure she was covered. The warmth of her body felt so nice. I’ve never felt more content than I do with Sydney. I stroked her hair and kissed her forehead again. She let her hand drop from my chest to my abdomen. No, I liked when she touched my chest. I don’t know why exactly. I’m not sure if it calmed me or took the pain in my chest away. I just know I liked it and I wanted it. I bent again to kiss her and reached under the blanket, took hold of her hand and held it against my chest.
“I like this, sunshine.”
I felt movement of her cheek against my chest. She was smiling.
“I like it too, Sir.”
Sir.
All of a sudden the sofa dipped and I pulled Sydney tighter against me right before I felt a thumping fist on my shoulder. I glared at Evan. He raised his eyebrows then opened a bottle of water and handed it to me. I nodded at him, took the bottle and held it up for Sydney to drink.
“Sip, don’t guzzle, sunshine...good girl.”
Sydney sipped while I held the bottle and her eyes twinkled at the ‘good girl’ praise. When she signaled that she had enough I downed the rest of the water. Evan took the bottle and rubbed on Sydney’s legs over the blanket. I felt Sydney’s hand try to open and close against my chest indicating that she was uncomfortable or would rather Evan not rub on her. I looked over at Evan and shook my head and prayed that he would just listen to me and not question it.
“Is she okay, Graves?”
“She’s getting there.”
“Are you okay?”
I whipped my head around to stare at him. Why the fuck wouldn’t I be? Yeah I was pissed about him coming all over her face like an out of control twenty-something, but I had her in my arms and was doing fine. Aside from the chest pain. Maybe he could tell I wasn’t feeling right.
“I’m fine, Evan.”
“Alright, I’m going to go over to the bar for a while. You sure you’re okay with her?”
“We’re fine.”
He gave Sydney’s blanket clad leg a pat and said, “You’re right where you belong, little sub.” I didn’t know what to think anymore. I couldn’t think anymore. I just needed to shut my head off and hold Sydney.
I wanted him as far away from us as possible right now. He thumped me on the shoulder again as he got up. He jostled me, which jostled Sydney. What the fuck was wrong with him? I cuddled up with Sydney again and we settled down. We sat in silence for a while before I spoke to her.
“Sunshine, are you doing okay?”
“Yes, Sir. You’re here.”
I was doing something right. She was talking and I had made her smile. I made sure she was warming up and had fluids in her. I let my chin rest on top of her head and closed my eyes. This might be the closest to heaven that I’ll ever get. And if it was, I’d be happy with that.
I had dozed off with her in my arms and awoke to a male’s hand adjusting the blanket around Sydney. Sydney hadn’t moved or reacted nervously to the hand. Colin. She doesn’t flinch at his touch. Guilt suddenly washed over me. Colin is perfect for her. He’s calm, knows what he’s doing and can actually help Sydney. I can’t. Not like him.
“Hey,” Colin said quietly.
“Hey.” I paused and looked down at her and then up at Colin. I knew he was angry over how the scene with Evan went and he was concerned about her. “She’s okay, Col. We’ll want to talk to her after she has time to process it. But she’s okay. She’s warm and has been talking.” I kissed her head again.
“She’s okay because of you, Anth.”
I pretended not to hear that. I didn’t need anyone else telling me anything like that, feeding my ego. Especially Colin. Colin was so much better for her than I was.
He held a small bag of M&M’s in his hand and opened the package before handing it to me. I shifted some to sit up and adjusted Sydney in my arms so I could use both of my hands. I poured the candies into my palm and held them out for Sydney to pick through. I knew she’d eat up the green ones first. Those are her favorites. Colin and I watched in amusement while she ate the green ones.
“You know, they taste just like the other colors, sunshine,” I teased lightly with her.
She looked up at me with those dark blue eyes and smiled. She popped a yellow one in her mouth and looked upward as if she was pondering something.
“No, the green ones taste better.”
Colin and I laughed and I pulled her against me to kiss her lips. Those lips. What I had intended to be a chaste, sweet kiss turned into a passionate, mingle of our tongues. What was she doing to me? My body felt foreign to me and I felt out of control. Colin sat and talked quietly with us for a while and soon Matt and Gina joined us. They were holding my shirt and Sydney’s clothes.
“You okay, Anth?” Matt asked as he frowned and looked over at Colin. Was my body betraying me that badly?