Monday, December 2nd
Anthony
Fuck me! How in the hell am I ever going to function normally after tonight? Earlier when Colin suggested we go to Irons, I was skeptical. We had just met with Chris and found out about her fucking neighbor that her gracious adoptive father pushed her into “helping.”
Colin and I were on either side of Sydney, lost in a flurry of emotions. This being in love thing is the best feeling I’ve ever experienced, but it’s also making me feel like I’m spinning out of control. Colin and I were going to seriously start discussing expectations for Sydney tomorrow. Maybe by then I will be able to think clearly.
Even though I feel like I’m off balance, I know with certainty that Sydney was quickly becoming everything to me. I knew Colin felt the same and I was more than happy about that. Sydney had grabbed hold of us long before we even felt it and when we did feel it, it came with a wrecking ball force. She deserves to be happy and pain free for the rest of her life. And we’re going to make sure she gets that.
She was asleep and I began to lazily stroke her tummy. I think I had even drifted off to sleep a bit earlier. I was that relaxed. I can’t remember the last time I came so hard. My throat was raw and I needed more water. I made sure Colin was touching her under the blanket and then I slipped myself out from her soft hand and sat up. When I sat up and saw that Blake was sitting in the room, all I could do was smile and laugh a little.
“Doing okay, Anthony?” He asked as he leaned forward in the chair. I went to answer him but I barely had a voice. He laughed and handed me a bottle of water. I drank the entire bottle before coming up for air.
“Yeah, I think I’m doing just fine, Blake.” I glanced over at Sydney and made sure we weren’t waking her up. “How long have we been out of it? I think I fell asleep.”
Blake looked at his watch and shook his head. “Not long. Maybe close to an hour. Colin is really wiped, as is Sydney. You’re looking the most alert.”
“I feel good. I…” I stopped talking. What was wrong with me? I don’t blab about feelings to other guys. Sydney has me so off balance.
“It’s okay to talk about your feelings, Anthony. You’re allowed to. I’m not your folks.”
I hated how that sounded. He made it sound like I didn’t talk about feelings because of them. And fuck, maybe that’s exactly why I didn’t care to talk about feelings. But hell, he didn’t have to call me on it. I glanced down at Sydney. She was still sleeping. I returned my gaze to Blake.
“I feel like I’m bouncing close to the edge of a trampoline.”
Blake laughed as he looked at Sydney and Colin before looking at me.
“Anthony, you’re deeply connected to her and in love. Love feels like that, especially in the beginning. It will settle down and you’ll manage to relax.” Now Blake looked a little cautious with his words, which grabbed my attention right away, and I busted his balls over it.
“You know Blake, you shouldn’t be afraid to say what’s on your mind.” I was proud of my double standard jab at him.
He nodded and then spoke up. “I’ve known you since your early twenties. I remember when you first walked through the doors downstairs. You were a young man trying to get accepted and selected by a Master for a mentor. I watched you in the classes and the interviews. I never made a habit out of taking on a new Dom but I saw so much potential in you. You were very passionate about everything you did and you took everything very seriously. There was a sense of maturity about you that was well beyond your years, but there was also darkness about you. I knew you had skeletons in your closet and that your past was something you’d rather never talk about. I pushed you and watched you grow into the Dom you were meant to be. You quickly exceeded my expectations and hopes that I had for you with the exception of one thing until very recently. I wanted you to find a little sub that would make you question everything. I knew that once you found her, you’d give her everything you had to give. And, in return she’d give you everything you ever needed and were missing. Over the years, I’ve watched you play and interact with submissives and bottoms but never saw that spark of connectivity. Until Sydney.”
I glanced back over at her and tugged the blanket up around her shoulders to make sure she didn’t get colder. Blake was right though; Sydney definitely created a spark in me.
“She makes me feel good, Blake. Things I’ve never felt before.”
“She has turned you and Colin inside out. The way you two are with her is a breath of fresh air. You two connect with her on a deeper level and all three of you feed into each other and support one another. I’ve watched more scenes than you and Colin combined and I’ll tell you that scenes become so much more when one very special ingredient is involved…love. The three of you have unconditional love for one another in spades.”
Blake and his infinite wisdom. I can’t knock him though. He’s had the most positive influence on my life and he did mold me into what I am. I’m a better man because of him.
Colin was awake now and had propped himself up on one arm but stayed where he was and began rubbing on Sydney’s arms. He looked exhausted. Tonight took a lot out of the three of us.
“Anth, we should get going.” Colin suggested while he dropped kisses on Sydney to slowly wake her up.
Blake stood and handed Colin and I our clothes. “Take all the time you guys need. I don’t want the three of you leaving before you’re ready.” He gave Colin and I hard stares before he headed back out into the hall. Colin and I had heard him loud and clear. He didn’t want either of us driving unless we were on solid ground. I knew that I wasn’t on solid footing yet and Colin was more fucked up than I was.
“Let’s get dressed and go sit downstairs for a while. We’ll get something to munch on and some more liquids in us,” Colin suggested.
“Sunshine, time to get up.”
I kissed her lips softly and she stared at me with those sleepy, dark blues. Her eyes are so beautiful. I wanted a smile from her though so I bent down and licked from her right ear down her jaw and then up the left side. She gave me the smile I was hoping I’d see and then she giggled. Too fucking cute. Colin wrapped her up in his embrace and held her on his lap while he rubbed on her arms.
Fuck, that’s right. Sydney had gotten cold so quickly after sex. I remember rubbing on her to infuse some warmth to her skin. I reached out and put my hand on her cheeks to check her temperature. She wasn’t cool but wasn’t really warm either.
“I know, baby. It’s not very warm in here is it?” Colin asked her while he rubbed on her.
Interesting. Colin thought it wasn’t very warm in the room. I stared at him wondering if I should say anything. I wasn’t hot or cold but felt pretty normal. I decided to leave that stone unturned for the time being and got off the bed.
Once Colin and I were dressed we helped Sydney dress. She stood leaning against Colin and wrapped her arms around her abdomen. Neither of them looked with it. I slowly took hold of the play collar and pulled her into my arms and told her how proud of her Colin and I were. She looked up at us with that sleepy smile of hers. Sydney is learning to accept praise from us and glowed knowing she made us proud.
“Are you sore anywhere, sunshine? I asked while I rubbed my hand gently over her lower back as she snuggled again my chest.
“No, Sir. It was a very full feeling though. Kind of felt like I was being split in two.”
I couldn’t help but laugh while I glanced at Colin. I continued to rub her lower back and kissed her head. Little fragile kitten was going to have to get used to that full feeling.
Down in the main room we took up the seats where we usually sat. Colin pulled Sydney onto his lap while Sydney let her head rest on his shoulder. I knew they were both chilled so I grabbed a soft throw from the basket under the coffee table and draped it mostly over Sydney, though Colin would gain some warmth from that.
“I’m going to go get us some Cokes and something to eat.” I looked only at Colin making sure he was okay before I left them. He pulled himself together and said they’d be waiting for me.
While I waited for the drinks, Seth came over and leaned on the bar next to me.
“Hey, that was an awesome scene you guys did with Sydney. Just about everyone packed the hall to watch. Everyone couldn’t say enough good things about the three of you. Very classy the way you controlled her and kept her mind from running away with itself,” Seth said as we both turned to look at Sydney and Colin. “How is she doing, man?”
“Sydney is doing well. She’s getting better.”
“That’s great news. I don’t know if you know, but everyone is pulling for her. A lot of the Doms and Mistresses that are close to you guys or Blake know of Sydney’s situation and are all hoping for the best for her.”
“Thanks, Seth. I don’t know what to say.” I nervously rubbed the back of my neck. Had I been this blind? Apparently all I’ve been able to see has been Sydney. “I didn’t know. But I’m glad you told me. Please pass along our thanks to anyone who asks.”
Seth nodded and then helped me carry the drinks and the bowl of munchie mix over to Colin and Sydney. Colin brought his arms out of the blanket to take one of the drinks and hold it up for Sydney to sip through a straw.
Colin drank pretty fast and shoved some of the munchie mix in his mouth. He was doing better by the time I glanced at my watch. It was going on 11:00 p.m. I turned my head to see who else was around. After the incident with Paul in the dungeon, I’ve tried to be more aware of my surroundings. I usually was aware, but that night Sydney clouded my mind. I was going to start making sure that Sydney starts paying close attention to her surroundings as well. Being as jumpy and nervous as she is around crowds, I have a feeling that she is already the aware type. But just in case, I’ll make sure Colin and I talk with her about it before she goes out shopping with Gina again. My eyes landed on Blake. He was leaning on the bar watching us.
Turning my attention back to where my focus needed to be, I nudged Colin’s foot with mine.
“Ready, Col? It’s late. We need to get her home.”
Just as we had done previously, we took Sydney to the side to remove the play collar. I knew she was still somewhat out of it from our playing. It was special for many reasons. Colin held her hair up and she looked down at the floor as I approached her to remove her play collar. She did this the last time too right before she broke down on us Friday. I pushed her chin upward with my index finger and saw her nostrils flare.
“Eyes,” I said softly.
Very slowly her eyes met mine. What the fuck? They were watery. My heart began pounding as I thought back to Friday night and how much she cried in the lobby. I worried we were headed straight for that again. To give her credit though, I know how emotional everything has been and what we did tonight was much higher on the emotional chart. I wanted to make sure she was okay and just coming down from that high. I thought I could try to get her to smile.
I reached out and playfully took hold of the collar and tugged her gently towards me. Her eyes lit up and a beautiful smile appeared on her face but tears still spilled down her cheeks and she quickly tried wiping them away. Colin’s hand came up to catch tears on one side of her face while my free hand caught the other.
“Baby, why the tears?” Colin asked as he walked around to stand beside me.
Sydney began shaking her head rapidly and brought the back of her hand up to her lips. She was smiling but the tears continued to fall. Colin pulled her into a hug while I still had my fingers on the inside of her collar. Sydney leaned her head on Colin’s chest but wrapped her hand around mine on the collar.
“Tonight was special, baby. It was emotionally heavy and I think we’re all a little drained from it. It’s okay to cry, we’ve got you.” Colin kissed her forehead and reached around to the back of her neck and began to unbuckle the collar. “Let me get you out of this, baby, and we’ll go home.”
I felt her body tense and her hand gripped mine a little tighter. Almost desperately. I watched her facial expression and felt the way her body reacted when the collar came off. I figured she was reacting to Colin’s hand up on her neck. She still gets a bit nervous with hands near her neck. She swallowed hard and watched me roll the collar and put it in my pocket.
We helped her into her sweater in the foyer as Blake came over to us. I knew what he was doing. He was just making sure that Colin and I were fit to drive. We were fine now and I was sure that Blake felt comfortable with that as well.
Colin and I each took hold of her hand and led her outside to the car. I casually glanced around our surroundings as we headed towards the car.
“Col, I’ll drive. You sit in the back with Sydney and hold her.”
“I can do that,” he said while he held the door open for Sydney.
Sydney chimed in and said she felt fine and Colin could sit in the front if he wanted to. Absolutely no fucking way. But before I could even say anything, Colin had it under control.
“Baby, not a chance. It has nothing to do with if you are feeling fine. We want you in one of our arms. So climb in.”