Chapter Seventeen
Milo – Saturday
Why didn’t Eliza want to stay with me? Am I that... un-cuddly?
I mean, I wasn’t expecting her to want to marry me or anything, but it was usually me making the quick escape. It felt strange to be on the other side of that. It actually made me feel a little bad for doing it myself. Maybe I should have been a little more thoughtful; maybe this was karma coming back to bite me in the ass.
I tried to sleep, but those thoughts plagued me and swirled through my brain, affecting my dreams and constantly waking me up. I wanted to believe that she just didn’t know me or trust me well enough to sleep in the bed with me, but I had the horrible sense that it was something more.
Maybe I would find out this morning, now that I was awake early enough to hopefully at least have a cup of coffee with her, and I’d be able to judge the situation. I patted Veil and encouraged him out of the door and into the living room area. He didn’t race off to the window like he did when Eliza wasn’t there anymore, but I went anyway, just to check.
As I spotted her vehicle still sitting there, I let out an audible sigh of relief before spinning around to see her standing right behind me with a bemused look on her face.
Shit, how embarrassing. I actually felt myself flush a little bit as I was caught in the act. There wasn’t any chance of me looking and acting cool now – the cat was out of the bag. I wanted Eliza around. I still wanted to spend time with her, and now she knew it.
“Morning,” she said casually, as if she didn’t know anything, at all.
“Yeah, good morning.” I shot her a shy smile back. I felt grateful that she wasn’t making a big deal out of anything; it made it much easier to overcome. I wanted to at least get back to a place where we could have that awesome friendship between us.
Of course, I wanted a lot more, but I would be okay if she didn’t, especially as I wouldn’t be in Florence forever. The last thing I wanted to leave behind was a broken heart, nor did I want to take one with me. “Coffee? I’m getting good at the pot now.”
“Sounds great.”
As she sat at the kitchen counter, flicking idly through a magazine sitting on the side, I couldn’t stop myself sidling glances at her out the corner of my eye. I felt drawn to her, as if we were magnetized, and every single time I looked at her, I noticed something else I liked. It was almost as if this was the first time I could see her clearly, and everything about her was amazing. That black, wavy hair, those piercing hazel eyes, her sweet, milky skin...
God, I wanted to kiss her. If this were anyone else and the situation were any different, particularly if it had happened before I got sick, I would have just acted upon that urge without thinking about the consequences. Now, though, I needed to be careful – this situation felt much more sensitive.
“So, do you have a busy schedule ahead of you today?” I asked her casually, hoping to gauge her reaction. “Lots booked in?”
Her eyes snapped up to me, but from the odd look she gave me, she wasn’t thinking about work. “Maybe,” she finally said slowly, “we should talk about what happened last night.” I nodded, dumbfounded. This was new. “I don’t know if it was... a good idea. It’s probably best for us not to get involved, considering you’ll be leaving soon enough.”
“Okay,” I almost whispered as a reply. Despite the fact that I’d tried to gear myself up for that and had assumed that I would be okay with just being friends with Eliza, I couldn’t stop the cold, sinking sensation that filled my chest. “Yeah, sure.
“So, are you cool with... just going back to the way that things were?” She narrowed her eyes, actually looking a little scared that I might say no. “I mean, we could still go out for drinks tonight, if you’d like? It might just be me, you, and Laynee, though. I doubt Marc will be there.”
“Yeah.” I gulped down the thick ball of emotion that lodged in my throat, trying to sound like I had everything under control. “Yeah, that sounds great.”
“Thank you.” She moved toward me and kissed me lightly on the cheek. “I appreciate you being so understanding. I’m not a... That sort of person... I just, well, you know...”
She was rambling again, her cheeks heating up. It made me want to reach out and grab her – but I couldn’t; we’d just agreed. I needed to stick to what we’d just decided.
Getting it out of our systems hadn’t solved the problem, at least not for me. If anything, it had made my need for her a whole lot worse. And now, I couldn’t have her, making her even more tempting! I was in a real mess.
“It’s okay.” I smiled as brightly as I could muster. “Now, you get to work. I’ll see you for drinks later. I have a new security company to find today anyway.” If I could do something positive, it might take my mind off everything and make me feel better. “I’ll see you later.”
I retreated to the bedroom, feeling sadder than I thought I would. Eliza was just another girl, someone to have fun with. Just because she was different from what I was used to, didn’t mean I had to read too much into it. We’d had our fun, and at least we could still be friends.
I was just going to have to find a way to be totally okay with it, for real.
***
Does she have to look so heart-stoppingly beautiful? I thought scathingly to myself as we stepped through the doors of the local watering hole.
There wasn’t anything particularly special about this bar; it was clearly just the best place available, but when Eliza stepped through the door in that deep-green dress, the whole place lit up. She was a real vision of beauty, one that made it hard to just stick to the friendship rule.
Okay, so maybe that was just in my eyes. None of the other guys sitting at the bar, clinging to their beers as if they had nothing else to live for, noticed her, but she was all I could see. It was as if the sun’s rays were beaming down on her alone.
“Hey! Eliza!” A girl who had clearly had a couple before we even arrived came bouncing over to her. She was sweet and pretty, with a stark-black suit that clung to her hips and contrasted with her light hair well. “And you must be Milo.”
She gave me a little wink, but one that was much more knowing than it was flirty. She seemed to know that Eliza liked me and possibly that I did her, which meant that I would have to try and get the chance to speak to her alone later. Just to see what I could find out...
“It’s nice to meet you. I have some drinks at the bar; shall we get a table?”
We followed her and sat down. Instantly, the girls started talking about work, which gave me the chance to sit back and watch them interact. Despite the fact that Laynee was a little younger than Eliza and worked for her, they seemed to have a strong friendship that was nice to see. It meant Eliza was a good person, only confirming what I already knew about her.
After only a few moments, Eliza excused herself to go to the bathroom, giving me the chance to speak to her friend. I wasn’t sure what I wanted to find out exactly, especially if we were just going to be friends, but I couldn’t seem to stop myself from being desperate to know more. I actually wanted to know everything about her; it was strange!
“So, you been friends with Eliza long?” I started blandly, trying to sound casual. I didn’t want her to guess what I was up to.
“Yeah, ages.” She did a mock over-the-top sigh. “I don’t know why that girl is still single; she’s so awesome. Pretty, too, don’t you think?”
“Erm, yeah, I do.” From the way she said it, it didn’t seem like she knew everything. Eliza hadn’t told her best friend about us hooking up. What does that mean? It seems a little strange. Is she embarrassed by me? “Yeah, she’s a great girl. I don’t know why Josh was such an asshole to her...” My ears pricked up at that. Who the hell is this Josh character? Is he the reason she tried to push me away? “I’m glad he’s out of the picture. He was never good enough for her.”
But before I got the chance to question Laynee further, Eliza was back at our table, silencing us both. “Shall I get us in another round?” I asked to cover up the awkwardness now surrounding the table. “What do you girls want?”
I smiled at the girls in turn as they put in their orders, then I made my way to the bar while I stewed over Laynee’s words. There was something that she was getting at, something that she wanted to tell me, but I couldn’t quite figure out what it was. Is it that Eliza still has feelings for Josh? Is it that her friend wants me? Or is it that Eliza actually likes me? A concept I haven’t dared let myself believe.
“Hey, there.” I felt a soft hand touching my shoulder, and I spun around in shock to see a smile I didn’t recognize staring back at me. “My name is Phoebe. I don’t recognize you. Are you from around here? I would have thought that if I’d seen you around, I would have noticed for sure.”
“Erm, no...” I shook my head, a little bewildered. What the hell is going on here? “No, I’m on vacation.”
“You are? Well, that’s just great.” She sidled closer, pressing herself up against me and giving me the chance to see down her top. “I could always... show you around if you wanted.”
Okay, now I get it. She was coming onto me – had I been out of the game that long? The way she was flickering her eyelashes at me, her lips pouting, her breasts sticking out... she wanted me bad. I could have taken her into the bathroom and screwed her in a heartbeat, but I didn’t want to.
“I don’t...” I wasn’t even thinking about the words leaving my mouth because I didn’t care. “I don’t really...”
I flicked my eyes backward to see Eliza looking pale and freaked out. The moment our gazes connected, she darted her eyes away, but the damage had already been done. She had seen me connecting with another woman, and she didn’t seem to like it. In fact, she looked seriously perturbed about the whole thing.
Maybe she did like me after all – a thought that made me smile widely. Maybe that big speech that she made back at home about returning to normal was all a brave act. Maybe she didn’t mean it at all.
“Sorry, I have to get these drinks back to my friends.” I blew Phoebe off quickly, not even caring to look at her reaction, and I made my way back to Eliza, excited to see where the night would lead. The possibilities were now endless...