Chapter Twenty-Three
Milo – Tuesday
I tried to spend the day productively. I tried to get my plans for Landon in order, making note of everything he wanted to do so that when I went to Justin for advice, I had everything in my mind. I was excited about this opportunity, happy to move forward with it, but I wanted to get everything nailed.
But I wasn’t getting as far along with it as I would have liked, since my mind kept wandering in a different direction. I kept thinking about Eliza, driving myself crazy. And the fact that I hadn’t heard anything from her didn’t help things. I just wanted to see her, speak to her, and know where her head was at.
Is that her?
Veil jumped up excitedly, racing to the window, which meant her car was pulling up in the driveway. I quickly raced to the mirror, checking out my slightly disheveled appearance. I screwed up my nose at my expression, unhappy with what I saw, but it was far too late to change. In fact, I was pretty sure that I could hear her steps outside the door.
My heart pounded in my throat, emotions dancing in my chest. I smiled brighter than I ever had before. It was official. I’d become a sad little schoolboy with a crush. I didn’t think this was desirable to women – if anything I felt like it might put Eliza off – but I just couldn’t stop it. I had absolutely no control over myself anymore.
“Hey.” I slid into the front room. “How’s it going? Oh, oops, let me help you with that.”
She was struggling in with more grocery bags, which made me feel bad. Sure, I’d more than paid for my time here, but it didn’t feel right for her to be spending so much money on me. She was having money and business troubles, yet she kept buying me food when she didn’t have to.
“I would have made dinner,” I told her as I took the bags from her hands. “Sorry, I didn’t even think about it.”
“Actually,” she sighed sadly, setting things down before turning to face me. Her soulful eyes looked cold and distant, causing a hollow sensation to burst across my chest. Whatever words were about to come out of her mouth, I already knew that I wasn’t going to like them. “This is more of a goodbye dinner than anything else.”
What? I wanted to scream, to cling to her, but I forced my lips to remain sealed and my arms to stay clamped by my side. Even if I didn’t like it, I had to hear her out.
“The landlord finally fixed the pipes in my apartment, so I can go back home. Tomorrow, actually, so I wanted to let you know how grateful I am that you had me here. It would have been difficult for me if you didn’t.”
“Oh, sure...” I gulped, trying to make the sadness go down. I should have known that this was coming, I should have been expecting it, yet it hit me like a thump in the face. “Oh, right, well, of course.” I shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant, but from her expression, I didn’t think I was totally pulling it off. “Well, it’s been great having you.”
“I’m just going to get changed, and then I’ll be out to cook.”
As she raced away, seemingly wanting to keep her emotions from me, too, I wanted to yell out, to beg her to stay, to tell her that Florence wouldn’t be the same without her by my side, but I couldn’t. This was a business arrangement; we’d started this knowing that it wouldn’t be for the full two months, but still... It was all happening too soon.
I glanced down at Veil, wondering if he could understand the situation, too. Before Eliza came into my life, I wouldn’t have even considered him comprehending anything, but now... Well, now I wasn’t so sure.
“I know, buddy.” I smiled, ruffling his fur. “It’s gonna suck without her.” I didn’t feel as silly talking to him now – it was becoming much more natural to me. “But we gotta do what we gotta do.” I’d be gone soon enough, anyway; this was just a good way to prepare for me for that.
I can’t let her go. All logic aside, I just wanted her to stay.
“So, how does stir fry sound to you?” she called from the other room, making me miss her even more. She wasn’t even gone yet, and I felt empty without her. “I thought something quick would be nice, and I got some wine, too.”
“I’ll start it,” I told her, trying to keep my tone upbeat. “That’s so simple, even I can manage it.”
“Thank you.” As she came back into the room in shorts and a casual t-shirt, the image of her tugged violently on my heart strings. I wanted to go to her, to hold her, to never let her go – but this night wasn’t about that. It was us having a friendly goodbye, a thank you dinner. This would likely be the last time we saw each other before I left.
“So, how did things go with Landon? Did you enjoy your fishing trip?”
“I actually caught something!” There was that pride again, lacing my tone. “It was awesome; he showed me around the factory, too.”
“And are you thinking of investing?” As she handed me a glass of wine, our fingers brushed against one another, sparking that electricity all over again. We didn’t acknowledge it, though.
“I am, actually. I didn’t think I would, but he has a lot going for him. He’s smart, he’s got a good business head, and he deserves some encouragement.”
“Yeah, he’s a good guy. I think he’ll do well. But if you didn’t think you were going to invest, then why did you come here? You booked a pretty expensive trip for two months, and you didn’t even think you were going to get anything from it.”
Because I almost died... Because I got sick... Because I needed a break from my shitty life. I could have told her everything. I could have opened up to her, but for some reason, I still couldn’t do it. I just didn’t want that sympathy in her eyes; I didn’t ever want to see her looking at me like that.
“Oh, because I wanted a break,” I told her evasively. “Sometimes running casinos and life in Vegas, it’s all just a little... blah.” Shit, I sounded like an arrogant idiot. “I don’t know. Don’t you ever think about running away?”
“Well, maybe I did a little when I lost my grandma because everything here reminded me of her. But aside from that, I’ve never wanted to leave. Florence is my home, and I love it here.”
Another person obsessed with Florence – there had to be something in that. It did seem to me like the sort of place a person remained in forever, and not in a scary, claustrophobic way, either. In a nice, contented way.
“Yeah, I can see that,” I replied with a smile. “It’s amazing here.”
“So, do you ever think you might come and visit again?” she asked innocently, sparking my interest. She wanted me to come back. She wanted me to visit again, and maybe I would.
“Yeah, maybe,” I replied carelessly. “I do like it here, so we’ll see.”
I glanced up at her for a reaction, and for a second, I was sure that I saw a smile on her face.
Neither of us mentioned it again, and we had a very casual dinner where we both avoided any difficult topics. It was the perfect way to round off such a wonderful time, if we were going to remain as just friends.
However, there was no denying the thick sexual tension that clung to the air. It went unspoken, neither of us even acknowledged it, but it was there the whole time. There would be the occasional look between us, the odd brush of a hand, her foot brushed against mine a couple of times, but still neither of us acted upon it. I kept waiting for some sort of sign, yet somehow it never came.
“Well,” she said as she finally slung her drink back, finishing off her last glass of wine. “I suppose... maybe it’s time to get some sleep.” She looked imploringly at me, and I wondered if that was my chance, but before I could act upon it, Veil barked loudly, breaking the magic of the moment. “Goodnight.”
“I’ve enjoyed you being here, you know,” I finally called out, causing her to spin around and look at me once more. “It’s been awesome, and while I’m glad your apartment livable again and that your landlord finally got off his ass to do something... it’s going to be weird without you here.”
She nodded quickly, her eyes filling up with tears, and then she turned quickly and shut the door behind her, leaving it at that. I guess that answered my question: it seemed like we were done, so I needed to go to bed myself.
I sighed sadly, cursing myself for not being braver, for not taking action sooner. Now I would have another long and sad night alone in my room, and tomorrow, she would be gone. That’d be the end of it completely.
I was an idiot, but it was too late now.
“Come on, Veil, let’s go.”
But I couldn’t quite make it. I didn’t quite get to my room. I just stood there, staring at Eliza’s door, my mind flickering between decisions. It would be so easy to go to bed, to forget about it all, but it’d be much easier to knock on that door and to finally make it happen. I had no idea what she truly wanted, whether she thought it was a good idea, but I also didn’t want to regret anything.
My heart was pounding, willing me to step forward.
What if she rejects me, reminds me that we’re just friends?
Can I sleep knowing that she is there, knowing this is my last chance?
Shit. There wasn’t any fighting it anymore. I stepped tentatively forward, praying that this would be okay, that this would turn out the way I wanted it to.
I lifted my hand, preparing myself to knock, my body freaking out like crazy, but before my skin could actually connect with the wood, the door swung open revealing a shocked, flushed Eliza.
“Oh,” she gasped, staring at me. Our eyes communicated a million things with each other, emotions we had no idea how to say aloud, and that sent our sizzling chemistry running wild.
I felt a wild, animalistic need building up inside of myself, and my whole body trembled as I almost lost total control. There was something about Eliza, something that brought out a side of me that I didn’t recognize, and I wanted to explore that further. I needed her. My body was pulsating for her. That magnetism was back and dragging me in toward her, and this time, I just wanted to succumb to it, to fall into her arms.
Our lips crashed together. I had no idea who made the first move, just that our arms were tangled around one another and that we were stuck together like glue.
I felt whole, complete with her in my arms, and when she pulled me into her room, it was as if all my Christmas wishes had come true at once. She was my dream girl, and she made me feel phenomenal. She was the only thing I wanted in the whole damn world – and that thought scared and thrilled me all at once.