Chapter Twenty-Two
Eliza – Tuesday
I still felt like shit when I woke up the next morning. I’d waited around all last night to speak to Milo, to tell him that I’d be going back to my house soon, but he never arrived. He must have been enjoying his fishing trip, which was good, but bad for me...
As I staggered out of bed, rubbing my bleary eyes, I wondered if he’d be around today to talk to. I wasn’t sure if I was up to the conversation, but it needed to be had. I wanted to know how he was going to feel about it all. I wanted to know if he was as disappointed as me.
“Come on, Veil,” I murmured quietly, actually feeling a little bad about stealing him all night long. “Let’s get you something to eat.”
My heart thundered as I tiptoed into the front room, but fortunately – or unfortunately, I wasn’t totally sure – Milo wasn’t there. His bedroom door was shut, which meant he’d come home last night, but he was still asleep. I sighed deeply, nodding to myself with determination before heading into the kitchen.
“Okay.” I pulled some stuff out of the cupboard and set about cooking, wondering if the smell of bacon might wake Milo up... but no such luck. He must have been exhausted and out of it. This clash in our schedules sucked, especially if I would be leaving soon.
Still, there wasn’t anything I could do – I had to work. Even without all the bills piling up on my shoulders like lead weights, I needed to work. I had to make the business succeed. I still wanted to make things better. I desperately needed to expand, and that wasn’t going to work if I kept taking time off.
After eating about as slowly as I could, I dove into the shower. With the hot water running all over my body, loosening my muscles and my inhibitions, my mind wandered without me having any control over it.
I thought about Milo in the way I was doing my best not to, especially around him so my face didn’t flush red, totally giving me away. I thought about his hands all over my body, my lips brushing my neck, his tongue flickering over my breasts, and it wasn’t long before my eyes had slid shut and I was in a full-blown fantasy, imagining him in the shower with me.
It was killer, knowing that he was just out there, that he wanted me, too, and that I could grab him at any given moment. It was getting harder and harder to continue doing the right thing, to keep being smart.
Maybe it didn’t matter that I’d end up with a broken heart. Maybe I needed to enjoy him while he was here. I realized that I’d been short-sighted. What I’d actually regret was not having an incredible time while he was here. He was the absolute best I’d ever had, and it seemed a shame to push that aside.
Okay, so seeing him with Phoebe the other night had made me fiercely jealous and that sensation would likely continue when he went home, but maybe it wouldn’t be so hard when I didn’t have to see it, when it wasn’t thrust in front of my face. Now that there was a time limit on us, I felt like I needed to take drastic action. I just wasn’t sure what.
As I jumped out of the shower, I pulled my clothing on quickly, now needing to get out of this cabin before bumping into Milo. I wasn’t sure that I could handle seeing him with everything running through my mind. I needed to talk to Laynee, even if I knew what her advice would be. I hoped she’d take my feelings into consideration and give me some smart advice, but I never could be sure.
“Shhh.” I patted Veil quietly, trying to keep him quiet. “I’ll see you later, okay? I won’t be long, just... Be good.” But he wasn’t listening to me; he was howling away to himself.
I clicked the door behind me and let out a deep sigh of relief. I’d gone from being desperate to see Milo to needing to get away quickly, and that didn’t stop here. I rushed to my car.
God, this is insane. I knew I was acting like a crazy person, but it was beyond that now.
By the time I pulled up outside the salon, I felt a sense of hysteria overcoming me. I needed to talk. I felt like I was bursting with the information building up inside of me, but it didn’t take me long to realize that Laynee wasn’t here yet.
To distract myself, I grabbed the cleaning equipment and furiously started to scrub the place, taking out my sexual frustration on the floors and mirrors. Everything was already clean, just as it always was, but I needed to do something, and unfortunately for me, the book of appointments was pretty empty again.
Shit, how the hell am I going to change that? Sure, renting out the cabin was working well so far, but I had no idea if I’d be able to do it again. I wasn’t sure if I could strip the memory of me and Miles off the walls. It would be far too weird...
And I certainly didn’t have any intention of getting myself in the same confusing mess again! I wanted this business to work. I was so desperate for it to pick up, why wasn’t that enough? Why couldn’t I just magically make that happen? Couldn’t the universe sense my desperation?
“Hi!” Laynee sang as she finally joined me. “Oh, God.” Her face fell the moment she saw me. “You’re cleaning like a maniac; what’s going on? Something’s happened, hasn’t it?”
She slumped into one of the chairs and leaned forward to examine me closely. “Is it Milo? Has something happened? Did he react badly to the news you’re moving back home?”
“No, he doesn’t know yet,” I admitted with a pout, putting some elbow grease into one of the walls, despite the fact that there weren’t any stains there. “He wasn’t home until late last night. I think he went fishing with Landon or something.”
“Landon? Really?” She raised her eyebrows in shock. “That seems random.”
“Well, I don’t know.” I flustered a little bit. “I think he came down here for some sort of investment thing, and I guess Landon must be it...”
“So, maybe he isn’t leaving for good.” She grew excited by that news, her eyes lighting up and her hands gripping onto the chair. “Maybe he’ll be back here a lot, dealing with his company, or whatever.”
“Does it work like that? I don’t think it does.” I didn’t want to be a downer, but there wasn’t any point in getting happy about something that would never happen. “I think investors just hand over the money and wait for their return. I doubt he’ll be back here again.”
“Oh,” she said, looking as defeated as I felt. “Oh, okay, that sucks.”
“Yeah, so I didn’t see him last night or this morning, so I haven’t had the chance to tell him anything yet. And now my apartment will be ready tomorrow, and I won’t get a chance to... to...” To be honest, I wasn’t totally sure how I wanted to finish that sentence.
Luckily, at that moment, our first and only customer for the day strolled through the doors, taking the heat off me. It was Miss Ramsey, an older lady who actually didn’t live too far away from my apartment.
“I’ll do this,” Laynee murmured. “You take a moment to work out what you want to do.”
That was all well and good, but I knew what I wanted to do – I just wasn’t totally convinced that it was the right thing. I sat down, my brain flickering from decision to decision, tuning everything else out, until Laynee raised her voice loud enough to drag me back into the room.
“So, Miss Ramsey, I have a hypothetical question for you.” She shot me a look, and I gave her a blank, confused expression back. “What would you do if you had a totally hot guy living under your roof, one that you wanted bad, and he wanted you bad, too...”
I gasped loudly, unable to believe that she was being so brazen. And using my life, too... although I had to admit that I was intrigued to see where this conversation would lead. If there was one thing I desperately needed, it was advice.
“But you had to leave for whatever reason, and you were afraid of getting your heart broken?”
“That isn’t a problem,” Miss Ramsey scoffed. “That’s got an easy answer.” I leaned forward, forgetting trying to be cool. I needed to know what this obvious answer was and why I couldn’t see it. “I’d bang his brains out; life is too short to be worrying about feelings. You want to regret what you have done, not what you haven’t.”
“I totally agree.” Laynee gave me a knowing look, and I couldn’t help smiling back, my face heating up. That was what I wanted to do – badly – and when she put it like that, it was more and more difficult to see why I wasn’t doing it.
Ugh, this is crazy. Why aren’t I just hopping into bed with this gorgeous man? Why am I so concerned about what might or might not happen in the future? I already got the sense that he wanted me – he’d certainly been more than up for it the last time – but then we went and had that stupid conversation, deciding to just be friends. Can I be that inconsistent? Will he think I am crazy if I totally change my mind?
Okay, so I needed a plan for this; I needed to decide what I was going to do. I was thinking about this now, considering it, and I had to go in there with a game plan. I needed to cook dinner, set the scene, and then maybe something could happen. Maybe once we spent a nice evening together and I dropped the bombshell on him, he wouldn’t be able to resist and he’d make the first move.
I could just picture the scene now. He’d stand up, shocked, and beg me not to leave. Then he’d wrap his arms around me and pull me in for a loving embrace, kissing me hard and passionately. Then he’d carry me and take me to the bedroom, where he’d ravish my body...
“Eliza,” Laynee suddenly snapped, dragging me from my thoughts. “Are you okay? We lost you there?”
“Oh, God, sorry.” I leaped up, knocking a whole bunch of papers to the ground as I did. I was so embarrassed to have been caught thinking such naughty thoughts, as if they could read my mind. “Ugh, I’m an idiot today, sorry.”
“Yeah,” Miss Ramsey stage whispered to Laynee. “I think my advice was right. She does need to jump this man’s bones. It might sort her out.”
I rolled my eyes, hating the fact that discretion wasn’t an option here, but there was nothing I could do now. I just had to hope that Milo didn’t communicate with many people while he was here, that he continued to pretty much keep to himself, so I could keep my dignity intact. At least, a little bit.
Well, I’d likely be safe until tomorrow anyway, and that was when everything had to come to an end. After that? Well, it probably wouldn’t matter anymore – a thought that damn near killed me.