Chapter Thirty-Seven
Justin – Sunday
“So,” I started slowly as I cooked the eggs breakfast I was making for Annie. “Do you mind if I ask what your plans for the future are now? With regards to Boffees, I mean?”
I hated to tackle such a serious subject so early in the morning, but now that I was in, I was all in and I wanted to know how we could make things work. This was my roundabout way of getting to that because long distance would only take us so far. Eventually, we would have to get to that, so why not look at our options now? It made perfect sense to me.
“Hmmm,” she sipped her coffee thoughtfully, then brushed a stray strand of hair out of her eyes.
Her natural morning look was the most beautiful of all, especially when I remembered all the things that we got up to the previous night. She was so sweet, so innocent, but so sexy, too. She was the perfect balance of the all the best things, and it made me smile to know that she was mine.
“Well, I don’t think that I’ll be looking for any further investment,” she completely stunned me by saying. She was so ambitious before, so determined. I hated to think that I had taken that away from her. “I think what I want to do is stay here in Florence to focus on the store that I have for the time being.”
“Really?” I gasped in shock, laying the plate of food out in front of her. “But I thought…”
“I know, I know,” she smiled at me, taking a bite. “It was all that I ever wanted, but now… Well, now I think I might be seeing things more clearly. It isn’t just about the percentage of the business that I’ll have to sacrifice to get the money I’ll need; it’s time, too. I don’t want to be racing about from city to city, leaving Rae all the time, especially not when she starts school and she’ll have to be in one place all the time.
“Plus, I’m loving the close relationship that I have with my mom at the moment. It wasn’t always that way, not when I was with Rae’s father, and now with my dad gone…I guess I really don’t want to lose her.”
She smiled brightly at me, showing me that she’d put a lot of thought into her decision and it was the right one for her. I was pleased for her; she deserved to have the life that she wanted. “Also, I’ll need the time to write the rest of my books, now that I have that contract to complete.”
I mock sighed and leaned back in my seat, staring right at her. “So I guess there’s no chance of you opening a branch in Portland, then?” I was only joking, but I couldn’t help hoping that she might just say yes. My business was there, my entire life was there, Garret was still there; I couldn’t just give all of that up so easily. Not without a lot of organization.
“I’m afraid not,” she shrugged her shoulders regretfully. “I don’t think that Boffees would do so well there, anyway.”
She was probably right about that one; it was the sort of place that thrived on the sort of small community that Florence offered. I couldn’t hate her for making that choice. Not when I understood it so well. After learning about her the previous night and her relationship history, I felt like I understood her a lot more, and I liked that. It made me feel special and built our bond even more. I would just have to make some changes of my own when the time came – I wasn’t trying to rush things.
“That’s fair,” I wrapped my arm around her shoulders. “But you can’t blame a guy for trying.”
She kissed me lightly on the lips and rested her forehead against mine, allowing me to see deeply into her eyes. As I gazed upon her, I knew that she was the obvious choice, and that it’s be easy to uproot everything for her. Sure, there would be challenges along the way, I wasn’t being naïve about it, but knowing what was waiting for me on the other end would make it all worth it.
“Now,” she smiled brightly. “I don’t know what your plan is for the day, or when you have to go home, but I’m about to go and pick up Rae from Mom’s if you want to come with me.”
I felt so honored that she would even ask. It must have been so hard for her to trust me around her daughter, even more so than other moms, but she had, and that had to mean that I was something incredibly special to her. It was just lucky really that Rae liked me, too, because I had the strong sense that I would have been out on my ear if she hadn't.
“I would love to come!” I agreed happily. “But I was hoping for five more minutes with you first.” I wiggled my eyebrows suggestively at her, and she giggled at my request.
“Oh yeah?” she decided to play it innocent, which made me join in with the laughter. “Why’s that? What could you possible need five minutes for?”
“Oh, go on then,” I grabbed her arm and pulled her up onto my lap. “Let’s go wild, and make it ten.”
***
Rae was absolutely full of beans as we picked her up, telling long and complicated tales of what she’d gotten up to with her grandmother.
That made me appreciate Annie’s need to stay in Florence even more; how could she take away the small amount of family that Rae had from her? I hadn't asked because it didn’t seem right to, but it didn’t seem like the rest of Rae’s father’s family were involved in her life, either. It was just her and her mom.
“So, how are things?” Annie’s mom asked me discretely as she went off to pack up her daughter’s belongings. “Annie looks happy.”
“Things are good between us,” I told her as a proud joyful feeling filled me up. “I’m really glad that we’re finally where we are.” I wasn’t sure how much she knew, but I got the impression that they shared everything these days. “I feel bad for when I wasn’t exactly…perfect, but I hope now that she’ll give me the chance to make up for it.”
“Trust me, when Annie lets you in, it’s for good.” She nudged me playfully. “You’re the lucky one.”
“Oh, I know,” I insisted. “I feel lucky. She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and I hope you know that I’ll never do anything to hurt her.”
“Believe me, I know. You would be out the door in an instant if I thought you would.”
To know that I had her approval felt really good. To know that she thought I was worthy of her daughter made me feel like maybe I just might be, and I knew then that I wouldn’t ever let her down.
“Thank you, I really appreciate that,” I told her warmly. “And you must all come up to Portland some time to visit…”
“Ah yes, that must be causing you both some issues,” she replied knowingly, hitting the nail right on the head. “Have you any plans for the future?”
“Well, it’s too soon right now,” I tried to answer her diplomatically, but she shot me a look confirming that she wasn’t buying that at all. “Okay, so I have been thinking about it a lot, and although we both have ties to each place, Annie has a daughter and that overrules everything else. So eventually, I’ll find a way to come to Florence.”
“Wow, that’s a massive sacrifice. You must really adore her.”
I love her, I thought, but I didn’t say that part aloud. I simply nodded instead. I didn’t want anyone else to know how I felt before Annie did. It was all about finding the right time to say it.
“Come on, Justin!” Annie eventually yelled, breaking our conversation apart. “I think Rae might just about be ready now.”
As Rae argued with her, we both chuckled quietly and said our goodbyes. In that moment, it hit me how much I didn’t want to leave, and it wasn’t just for Annie; it was for everything. I didn’t just have stuff waiting for me in Portland: I had friends and a readymade family waiting for me here, too. It wouldn’t be anything of a sacrifice – if anything, it would be a privilege.
I drove Rae and Annie back home in a relative silence, wondering how I could fast forward my plan to mostly retire from the company early so that I could make the move happen. I was going to have to train someone up to be a manager, someone that I really trusted to keep everything going well, and that would take some time. But it wasn’t impossible, so if I focused on that…
“What are you thinking about?” Annie asked, resting her hand on my leg.
I bit my lip and shot her a look. Could I tell her? Would it freak her out to know how seriously I was taking all of this? “Just the future,” I decided to tell her semi evasively.
“Yeah, I’ve been thinking about that, too,” she replied virtually silently. “It’s a tricky one, isn’t it?” Clearly my questions this morning had got her thinking. “But we’ll find a way to make it work, right?”
I looked at her, then in my rearview mirror to see Rae sitting there happily singing away to herself. This would work somehow, I would find a way. But I couldn’t tell her any of my plans just yet, in case it didn’t work out. The last thing that I wanted to do was disappoint her. “We’ll find a way, don’t you worry about that.”
As I dropped them both off at home, I felt like my heart was being torn from my chest. If I didn’t have so much to go back for, if I didn’t have a meeting with my brother’s lawyer in the morning, plus a load of business meetings to catch up on all week long, then I would have just stayed with her. I could tell that she wanted me to from the saddened look in her eyes, but she wouldn’t ask. There was one thing that Annie understood well, and that was responsibility.
In the end, I had to literally force myself to drive away, and as I did, I allowed my mind to wander.
I thought about how difficult all of this was for me, with Garrett, and how it must have been so much worse for Annie. If I was worried about the family reputation, then I couldn’t even begin to imagine what it must have been like for her. And, with a newborn baby to attend to, as well.
Sure, I wasn’t experienced in what life was like with a baby, but I could only imagine that it was a never ending chain of someone relying solely on you for everything. No sleep, no real rest, stress every second of every day…plus that nightmare on top of it? That prospect was too unbearable for words.
How did she manage to fit everything in? I couldn’t wrap my head around how she’d actually managed to do it all without super powers, it was amazing.
She was an incredible woman, the absolute best – and now she was mine, and I would never ever let her go. She wasn’t just beautiful and smart, like I’d first assumed when I met her; she was brave, too. Powerful and strong. Just the sort of woman that I needed in my life.