Chapter 3 – Jesse
As soon as I saw his face, I knew that I’d picked the right dress. I wanted him to see me differently, and while I was adamant that it was only a date, it was clear to me then that I wanted him to want me. What was so wrong with the idea of him choking a little because of how hot I was? I didn’t see anything wrong with that – and it was not out of the realm of possibility now that I’d seen his reaction.
“Do you like it?”
He nodded his head so fast that locks of his shoulder-length brown hair moved out of place. I had to stop my hand from wanting to right the rebellious strands, but I didn’t think that it was a good idea. He was looking at me as if he wasn’t going to be able to control himself if I pushed him any further. The look in his dark blue eyes was hard to take, but I forced myself to meet his gaze anyway.
“Yes. God, Jesse, you’re…”
“Beautiful? I think you already said that.”
I liked having Scott off of his game for a moment. It felt like he was always getting the best of me, and there was something to be said about having the upper hand. I liked it more than I should have. My eyes swept over his suit, which looked much like the one he wore every single day. I’d never seen him in anything casual, and I had to wonder if he even could be casual. He was always so serious that it was hard to see a lighter side of him.
“Do you want me to take your coat? You’re going to start burning up in here with the oven going.”
Scott smiled at me, but didn’t answer me one way or another. When I moved towards him, he finally started to realize what I was doing and let me take the jacket. I hung it up on the coat rack by the door, and when I came back into the room, I could tell that he was still staring at me. He hadn’t moved from his spot. Maybe the dress was too much?
“So I hope you’re hungry. I figure if you’re going to cosign for such a large amount of money and only wanted a meal for it, it better be the best, right?”
“Anything you make will be fine. I’d be happy if it was a bologna sandwich, as long as you made it.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. More than anything else I was shocked that he even knew what bologna was. I’d only had it a few times when my father would lose his job and money was tight, and a man like Scott knowing about it was surprising.
“When have you ever had bologna? If you’d had it before, I would bet that you wouldn’t be so quick to accept that for your dinner.”
“Do you really think I always had all of this money?”
“Yeah, I think so. You kind of act like you’ve always had it.”
Scott didn’t take my words as a compliment, and although I was being a bit sarcastic, I was a little surprised at how he responded to me. It was like he didn’t want to hear it. I think I pissed him off a little bit, which was surprising because I’d never seen the fast temper that he was displaying then.
“I didn’t mean any offense, really.”
“No, you’re most likely right. I do act like I was born into it, but I wasn’t. I was raised by a single mother. I knew who my dad was, but he was never around and he didn’t help out financially. It wasn’t until a year ago that I ever had more than a five-minute conversation with him. But I think he only gave me the business because of what I had going on. He knew that he could drop it in my lap and walk away.”
It was more than he’d ever said about himself, and I wasn’t sure what to do with the information. I couldn’t see him as a poor kid who wanted love from his father. It was a hard image to relate him to, but for a second, I could see that same little boy in his eyes. Scott made sure that the look was gone before I could say any more about it. It was gone so quickly that I had to wonder to myself if I’d actually seen it or not.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to assume. I would have never thought that about you. You seem to have it all together.”
He chuckled. I wasn’t sure that I saw the humor in it, but it was clear that he did. What was so funny about the poise that he had?
I could smell a little bit of something burning, and it reminded me that I was supposed to be cooking for him, not making him upset because of thoughtless questions and comments. He made me feel guilty for being so callous, and I told myself that I was going to be more careful with my words. I didn’t want him to think that I didn’t care about him. I did.
Going into the kitchen, I turned off the pan that was searing some meat and turned it over. It wasn’t black, just a darker brown than I would have liked, and it was all that I had, so I was going to make do with it. He wasn’t going to know the difference, I assured myself, not if he would have been happy with bologna. That didn’t really set the bar very high at all.
“What are you making?”
“Lamb with roasted potatoes, veggies and homemade ice cream.”
“So you’re going all out.”
“Well, I thought I was dealing with a rich man. I thought I was going to have to do better than hot dogs and cornbread.”
Laughing at me, he assured me that the menu that I just told him sounded better. “I wouldn’t mind hot dogs, but I’d much rather the lamb. It’s one of my favorites. How did you know that?”
“I didn’t. I’m glad that you like it, though. I should have asked you this morning what you wanted me to make, but you would just tell me to make whatever, so I didn’t even bother asking.”
“Yeah, I’m happy whatever you want to make. As long as I’m with you, Jesse, nothing else matters.”