Chapter 3 – Dylan
I made my way to the doctor’s office. I was still trying to figure out what I wanted to say to her. The last time I’d seen her, all she’d got me thinking about was what was going to happen to me and Maya. I didn’t like the thoughts that she brought up in my mind. I’d let it get to me, and I’d taken it out on Maya. It had done me good, though, and I’d gotten a lot off of my chest. I think it also changed the way that Maya looked at me. She was starting to really understand that I wasn’t prepared to share her anymore. I was ready for it to be just us.
That night, after I talked to her and told her what I was really feeling, Maya had come by later. She’d stayed long enough for us to both get the pleasure of each other, and then she stayed the night. It was the first time that I’d gotten to hold her in my arms all night and not have to worry about her husband in the morning. Maya hadn’t mentioned him, and that was just as well for me.
I wanted to tell someone the good news, and I knew that it was Camilla that I wanted to tell. In a way it was because she’d told me that it was one way and now that I knew it wasn’t, I wanted her to see it as I did, for what it truly was. We were in love, and although we hadn’t met in the most ideal way, there was sweetness to our meeting. It was going to be a good story to tell our grandchildren one day.
“Hey, Dylan. It’s good to see you here.”
I walked into her office and took a seat across from her desk. She sat back down, and the smile was genuine. She was happy to see me, and even though she was wrong about me and Maya, I knew that she was going to be happy for me. Camilla was always rooting me on, and she was one of the only people in the city that I knew was on my side.
“It’s good to be here, Dr. Camilla.”
“After last week’s tension, I was afraid I might not see you again.”
“I’ve been coming here for so long it’s really like habit nowadays.”
She smiled back at me, but I could tell that she had something on her mind. Her eyes weren’t as clear as they usually were, and the attention was still not there. The doctor had something else to think of, and I wanted to pull her back in. I was going to tell her the news that was literally ready to burst out of me. The longer I sat there, the more excited I was to tell her.
“So I saw Maya several times last week.”
“Maya, yes, the woman that you met from the online site, right?”
I shook my head and told her that Maya was the one.
“You warned me not to get my hopes up because she was married.”
She looked confused, and then I saw something else in her eyes. “Yes, well, I just don’t want to see you get hurt. I was not meaning that it can’t work because she’s married. So how did your meetings go?”
“They went well.” She seemed to have a completely different outlook on it today. Where was the doctor that was warning me about it so much the week before? What had changed? Or did she just see how much it meant to me and was as hopeful as I was?
“It went great, actually. After our talk last week, I had a lot of stuff on my mind. It was hard for me to think about her with her husband, and I wanted to know if she was ever going to leave him. I found myself saying more than I’d originally planned to.”
“And?” She encouraged me to go forward. The interest was back. I wasn’t just there to give her my sob story. I wanted her to hear some good news as well. My life was changing in such exciting ways. I was in love.
“Well, I told her that I didn’t want to share her anymore, and I told her how much I cared for her.”
“Good for you, Dylan. That’s good that you’re becoming so open with how you feel. How did she take it?”
The doctor was nervous, and I wanted to prolong it a little bit more. I wanted her to know that it was okay, but I liked the idea of making her sweat a little.
“Well, I don’t know. It was weird to say it all out loud, but I think it worked out, because she ditched her husband for me.”
“Oh?”
Now she was surprised, and that made me smile.
“What, are you surprised that she would leave her husband for me?” Why was I getting so defensive about it all?
“No, it’s just not what usually happens. You’ve been coming to me a long time, Dylan, and it’s hard for me not to care. I want you to be happy. You deserve it, after everything you went through with your wife. I’m just more realistic, I suppose. I’m glad that what you have with her is more than the average relationship. I want you to be happy.”
“Do you think it’s wrong that I want to be with her even though she’s married?”
Camilla stopped and pushed the short hair back from her face. She readjusted her glasses, and I could tell that she was really thinking about it. “Well, I know that morals are subjective. There’s obviously something going on in her marriage that makes her want to leave it. I don’t know what that is, but there could be trust issues later, I would imagine. With any relationship, though, there are always obstacles. Maybe you can look at it as: at least this obstacle you can see coming.”
She’d changed her tune on all of it completely, and I had to wonder what had gotten into her. It wasn’t like Camilla to be so wishy-washy about her moral guidelines. That was part of the reason that I kept going, but now I had to guess what had changed her.
“So you think it’s okay?”
“Like I told you last week, Dylan, there’s no judgment here. You’re a client that I care about and I just want you to be happy. You can understand that, can’t you? I’m not her doctor, I’m yours, so I’m automatically on your side.”
“Whether I’m wrong or not?”
“Wrong is never that easy. If you’re happy and you’re going in with your eyes wide open, that’s good enough for me.”
“What has gotten into you?”
She shrugged and just kind of looked off. “I don’t know, Dylan. I guess I’m learning that everything isn’t as black and white as it appears.”
There was something else, but I wasn’t in a position to press her. I spent the rest of the time talking about Maya and how everything was perfect. I didn’t have time to wonder what had changed Camilla’s mind so completely. I was wrapped up in my own little world at the moment, on a cloud that I never wanted to get off of.